Prue opened the front door of the manor and slammed it furiously behind her. She glanced around for her sisters, but they were no where to be found downstairs.
"Phoebe! Piper! She yelled, feeling herself grow more and more annoyed by the second. No one answered, so Prue decided the lack of response constituted a louder scream. "Phoebe!! Piper!!" She pricked up her ears to hear even the faintest sound, suddenly fearing the worse; in the Halliwell manor, that is all one can think when something odd seems to be going on. Faintly, Prue heard the sound of laughter from the back yard. Prue's fear immediately turned to anger once more. She stomped outside, only to find her two sisters in their bikinis, lounging in a three foot filled inflatable pool that bought at their local toy store. Both were sipping pina colodas.
"What the hell is this? Malibu Shores?!" Prue bitterly asked as her heart started to finally slow.
"No, Melrose Place," Phoebe retorted and bit into a piece of pineapple in her drink.
"I just made a whole bunch. Want some?" Piper asked, referring to the drinks.
"Well, it depends," Prue sighed. "How much liquor is in it?"
Phoebe giggled zealously. "Enough... hehehe..."
"Good, because after last night, I need a good drink," Prue answered, plopping down in the lounge chair next to the pool and pulling out her pair of sunglasses from her purse.
"Oh, that's right," Phoebe smiled an evil smile. "Big sister had a big date last night and didn't get home until..." she left off, glancing at her new water proof watch Cole had brought her back from his last trip to Australia, "11am. So, whatcha do? Where'd you go?"
"I was pretty much in the bathroom all night," Prue responded, feeling herself grow angry again.
"What were you doing in the bathroom? Hiding from his mom?" Piper joked.
"Yeah, for a bit," Prue responded, deathly serious which took Piper aback a bit. "But," she continued, "The rest of the time I just cried.
"You cried," Phoebe stated, shocked. "In the bathroom. You cried."
"Yeah."
"What could you, of all people, have to cry about?"
"Creative differences, DUI's, flight navigators... Look, that's not the point. That’s not what I am so angry about," Prue answered. She wanted her sisters to ask her what she was crying about, but the question never came. What Prue didn't realize, however, was that Piper and Phoebe just didn't care. They had had enough of her petty problems concerning such things as location in pictures and credits and didn't want to hear anymore of it. So, after a long silence, Prue answered her own question. "What I was really mad at was that the guy I was with last night wanted me to do a striptease to the theme of Mighty Mouse."
"Oh God, Prue, that's- that's- that's-" Phoebe tried to think of the right words to express her disgust. "That's just downright wrong and nasty! Please tell me you didn't do it!"
"Well..."
"Ewww!" Piper and Phoebe yelled together. Piper grabbed a handful of grapes they conveniently had laying by the side of the pool and threw them at her oldest sister.
"Hey!" Prue exclaimed, "It's not Friday night!"
"I don't care!" shouted Piper, tossing some more.
It was only after all of the grapes were laying amongst the grass in one big mess that the sisters called it quits and went back into the pool, Prue included. She just took off her day old blouse and skirt and went into the pool with her bra and underwear on; instant bikini. She spread out across from her sisters and finally let her guard down. It had been up ever since her date. Then, suddenly, she heard Phoebe gasp.
"Prue!"
"What?!?" Prue's mind ran circles in her head; was there a demon behind her? Aaron Spelling? A Warlock? All three choices were equally hideous to Prue.
"Y-you- you- you have a-a hickey on your- your stomach!" Phoebe exclaimed, still trying to overcome her shock at the evidence that her sister was indeed having sexual relations with someone other than herself this year.
Prue blushed and tried to cover it up with her hand, but both of her sisters had seen the large love bite and the damage was done. "Well," she started meekly, "He challenged my libido."
"So you let him suck your stomach?!" Piper asked, disgusted, though a plan for Leo was forming in her head...
"Well, there was no elevator nearby..." Prue Felt her face grow even redder, if that was possible.
"Damn, girl, you're my hero!" Phoebe chuckled.
"Me? A Hero? Hardly," Prue said incredulously. "No, I wouldn't say I am the hero of this family Phoebe, you are. I mean, the hottie form your dorm room, Cole, and your art professor? Now it is my turn to say, 'damn girl!'"
It was Phoebe's turn to blush. "Well, I just don't know what came over me after I read that diary."
"What diary?" Piper asked.
"The one in that box with all of the whorish clothes, shoes, and necklaces."
"Oh, I see," Piper said, secretly hoping Phoebe wasn't talking about the box Piper had saved from her little bar dancing incident...
They all sat in silence for a bit more, though Phoebe couldn't help but stare at Prue's hickey; it just seemed to scream out to her.
"Prue! Can't you just put something, anything over that? It's distracting me!" Phoebe pleaded.
"Distracting you from what?" Prue asked, intrigued.
"It's distracting me from watching Leo work!" Phoebe answered, suddenly looking up to the roof where the handy man/whitelighter was working. "I mean, talk about orbs of steel!" Phoebe grunted.
"Hey, that's my husband you're talking about!" Piper playfully smacked Phoebe but Phoebe maliciously slapped her back.
"No, it's my boyfriend I'm talking about."
"Huh?" Prue was confused, as was Piper. Phoebe just waved her hand.
"Oh, never mind. I've got to go get the mail." Phoebe got up and went around the front, making sure to wave and shake her butt at all of her Japanese groupies crowded around the house. The pool was filled with confused silence until she got back. Piper was just about to bring up the subject again, but Phoebe held up a letter to her. "Piper, it's addressed to you!" she said gleefully, as if she was about to explode form happiness.
"So, big deal, Phoebe. I get letters and emails all the time. In fact, I almost get as many as you," Piper said slowly as if Phoebe would get too confused if she said it at a normal speed.
"Yeah, but none from Tom Cruise!" Phoebe squealed and jumped up and down, presenting the letter. Piper looked unexcited... in fact, she looked downright disappointed.
"Oh, Tom Cruise again? I get a Christmas car from him every year. It's no big deal. From how excited you looked, though, I thought maybe it would be from someone exciting, like Scott Wolf or something."
"But, it's July," Phoebe stated with confusion.
"Yeah, I know," Piper admitted, "but Tom, I think, thinks Jesus was Born on the Forth of July."
"Ohhh," Prue said, though she was still confused. Maybe it is a life long emotion.
Phoebe finally fell asleep around 2am that night; she had been working on a new painting (it was her new hobby) and lost all track of time. She was asleep so soundly that she didn't even hear the demon shimmer into her room. He slowly walked to her bed and pulled back the covers, revealing Phoebe, clad in a parka, boots, and a fur muff. With naughty demon thoughts in mind, he started to slowly unzip Phoebe's parka, only to find layer after layer of clothes underneath. Discouraged, but not ready to give up, the demon bent down over Phoebe and kissed her. Finally, Phoebe woke up.
"Cole," she whispered and kissed him back.
"Hi Hun," he whispered back.
"Where were you all day?"
"Oh, I was working. Sorry I'm late," Cole replied. Phoebe was taken aback. Had she heard him right?
"Did I hear you right? Work? As in Assistant District Attorney Cole Turner work?"
"No, as in FBI Profiler John Grant work. Oh, speaking of that, I'm gonna have to install all of these video cameras up there and-" Cole rambled, but Phoebe cut him off.
"What the hell are you talking about, Cole?"
"You're gonna have to start calling me John, sweetheart. As for what's going on, lets just say it helps to have a father in the Australian hierarchy like mine," he finished smugly.
"But your father is supposed to be dead, honey. Your mom killed him, remember?" Phoebe said slowly as if to not confuse him as much as she was.
"Oh yeah," Cole remembered and stared off into space. Then, as if nothing happened, Cole started again. "But, any ways, we have to put this video surveillance stuff all around the manor so that if Jack attacks-"
"Who's Jack?!" Phoebe gasped. "A Demon?!"
"No, a psycho killer out to get us all," Cole shrugged. "So, I will start with these cameras tonight, right now in fact, and-" but Cole stopped talking suddenly and looked at Phoebe, confused. "Why on earth are you wearing so many layers of clothing?"
"Well, I decided I wanted to Brave Alaska for a day."
"Brave Alaska?" Cole asked, perplexed.
"Yeah, I figured you could shimmer us both to some deserted cabin in Alaska and when the food guy is one day late because of a storm, we can both try to walk all the way across that big state like idiots with some dog we'll find on the way."
"Right," Cole drew out the word sarcastically. "Why don't we just shimmer to Australia instead?"
"OK," Phoebe shrugged and Cole helped her take off her extra layers. After she finally got every outfit but one off, Phoebe wrapped her arms around Cole and they shimmered into the Australian sunset or whatever.
Prue and Piper were both in the kitchen sipping their coffee and reading the paper when Phoebe and Cole shimmered in. The four of them sat down at the table to have some of Piper's almost famous strawberry pancakes. They all sat, quietly enjoying their breakfast, until Piper broke the silence.
"Hey everyone, I want your opinion," she said, glancing around. "I think I want to join the army. You know, be a cadet, preferably in Texas. What do you think?"
"A cadet?!" Phoebe asked, totally in shock.
"Yeah, I have been thinking about it a lot," continued Piper, "and I think I could really achieve that murderous edge I have always wanted through this path. What do you think?"
"Well," Prue chose her words carefully. "I don't really know, Piper. I mean, Texas- its so far away and then there in the issue of actually getting through training and-"
"So, basically, you are saying it's a bad idea, right?" Piper asked, standing up so she could put her hands on her hips and raise her eyebrow.
"Yeah, just as bad as baby-sitting for your art professor," Phoebe chimed in.
"Or hiding your accent," Cole added tot he conversation.
"Or as bad as trying to run over your boyfriend with your car, or as bad as marrying some one after a few weeks or-" Prue rambled but stopped when Piper rose her hand.
"OK, I get the point! Consider the subject and idea dropped," she answered, dropping her hands to the table and staring hard at her plate.
"Speaking of subjects that are normally dropped," Phoebe chirped in, "Did anyone other than me notice that Dad totally looks different than he did three years ago when we had to face the shape shifting demons? It has always bothered me."
"Oh, yeah! I thought I was the only one!" Prue exclaimed. "What do you think it is? A nose job?"
"No," PIper contemplated. "I think it's something more. Like..."
"Like..." Phoebe pressed for more.
"Like falling down and having a permanent scar on his right eyebrow!" Piper exclaimed.
"No, that's not it," Prue groaned, annoyed at her sister's naiveness.
"Then what is it?" Piper shot back in a snide voice.
"It's like he is a totally different person," Prue said finally.
"Right, like that is possible," Piper said sarcastically. Prue just shrugged and the subject, like Piper's, was dropped. The table was silent yet again for a few minutes until Phoebe broke the silence.
"Hey, guess what! I'm the new president of my sorority!"
"When did you join a sorority?" Cole asked, surprised.
"Oh, a while ago. But, this rich bitch wants to take over... she makes me so mad!"
"Um, OK Phoebe," Prue said sarcastically. Phoebe just frowned.
"Hey, show a little respect, Prue. I mean, she did try to set me on fire."
"Hugh?!" Piper gasped.
"Oh, never mind. Long story. Any ways, good breakfast Piper!"
hat afternoon, Cole decided to take a shower. Due to all of the new surveillance cameras he installed, Cole put on his speedo swim suit so the guys at the station would not sneak a peek. After singing some of his favorite songs such as "Trains Lie" and "Stop", Cole finished washing his hair and body and opened the shower door. To his surprise (and Prue's), he was met with the wide eyes of none other than the eldest Halliwell.
"Oh my god, I am so sorry, Cole!"
"Uhh, eerrmm, that's ok. Um, my fault, I shouldn’t have been using this shower..."
"No, no! I mean, it's perfectly fine! You are, um, unfortunately Phoebe's boyfriend... Oh, wait, I didn't mean to say that. It came out wrong. I mean... What I meant was-"
Cole held up his hand and smiled, still not bothering to cover up his speedoed self. "Well, if that wasn't a Freudian slip, I don't know what is. No, I seriously am sorry Prue. Why don't I make it up to you?"
Prue glanced down and grew red. "Uhh, I don't think you have anything to make UP if you know what I mean."
"Oh, sorry," Cole said blushing, but recovered quickly. "No, really. How about I shimmer you to a beach where we can frolic in the waves and have our pictures taken by the media?"
"Are you gonna wear that?" Prue asked slyly, pointing to his speedo.
"Yeah, now get your skimpiest bikini you have, which shouldn’t be hard to find, and meet me here in 5 minutes."
"But what about Phoebe?!" Prue asked after she hesitated at the door.
Cole sighed. "You guys have been at each other's throats for months. 'I really don't get in the middle of stuff like that.'"
Prue smiled. "Ok!"
When Cole and Prue shimmered back into the manor, they both were giggling uncontrollably. All of that giddiness stopped, however, when they caught sight of Phoebe with her hands on her hips staring at them.
"What the hell is going on?!" she yelled at them.
"Oh, come off it, Phoebe. All we did was go on a little 1 hour vacation... nothing to worry about," Prue explained dramatically.
"Yeah, I DO have things to worry about when you, little miss slut who jumps at any chance to get married as soon as possible, are around," Phoebe screamed. "That's it! I can't take this anymore. Cole, you had better decide; her or me. Consider this an ultimatum and if you don't settle it, I will go to Aaron!"
"First off," Cole started, "Who's Aaron? And secondly, didn't you hear that the ultimatum was just a rumor and never truly happened that way?! My god, Phoebe, you had better go to SafeSearching and get up to date on the Rumor board!"
"You know what, Cole? I am getting sick of your neutral ways of thinking!" Phoebe screamed, not really thinking of a come back.
"Me? Neutral? Thanks," Cole smiled, knowing that it would disarm Phoebe. He was right. Prue, on the other hand, was still seething.
"Hey, I'm not finished!"
"Oh, go cast some vindictive, girlie spell then," Phoebe said from over her shoulder as she and Cole walked out of the room.
"Oh my God, everybody," Prue ran into the manor screaming.
"What happened? A Warlock? Aaron Spelling? What?!" Piper screamed back concerned.
"No, they took Davey! They just took him!" Prue broke down and cried.
"What? Who the hell is Davey?" asked Phoebe, confused but still ready for action.
Prue stopped crying and looked at Phoebe with confusion. "I don't know. You tell me."
"What? Prue, you are confusing. You need to be committed," Phoebe sighed, mad at the unneeded interruption.
"I was! My God, guys, don't you care that I was in jail for killing my daughter?"
Now Piper and Phoebe were more scared then confused. PIper decided to take charge. "Sweetie... Prue... you don't have a daughter..."
Prue looked at her sisters and shook her head as if to clear her thoughts. "Oh yeah, sorry. Something must have happened to me while I was Gone in the Night."
"Oh god, you didn't let that guy suck your stomach again, did you?" Phoebe groaned, suddenly sick to her stomach. She didn't think she wanted the answer to that question.
"No, Phoebe, my libido was not challenged. Actually I am going back to school to learn more about our magik powers. Its this great little college... 'Satan's School for Girls'. Have you heard of it?"
Piper and Phoebe just sighed, turned around, and left the room.
Piper closed the door for the 23rd time that day and turned towards the conservatory. What a weird day it was. As she started to walk back into the room, the doorbell rang again. She groaned. "Arrg, I am not going to answer that!"
Phoebe and Prue looked up from their quiet activities. "Why not?" Prue asked.
"Because in the past hour and a half, at least 23 people have been coming to the house, saying they are our sister, but I know that can't be true!"
"Hey," Phoebe said, sitting straighter. "Wierder things have happened. How do you know they aren't our sister?"
"Well," Piper started exasperated, "Let me give you the highlights of the visitors we had... Tiffany Amber Thesian, Jennifer Love Hewit, Tori Spelling, S-"
"Spelling?!?!?!?! AHHHHHHH!" Prue screamed and dived under the couch.
"Calm down!" Phoebe screamed, annoyed at her sister's behavior. Lately, their relationship had been failing; it just wasn't the same sleepover type as it was before. Now they were lucky they even talked to each other. The doorbell rang again. Piper groaned and sat down, refusing to answer the door. Prue peeked her head up from behind the couch she was hiding behind. "Here's something to do, Prue. Go answer it."
Prue stood up in defiance and walked towards the door. She was met with a dark haired woman, maybe in her mid twenties, who had a large jawbreaker in her hand. She looked vaguely familiar, but Prue couldn't place her finger on it. "Can I help you?" she asked the woman.
"Yeah, are you Prue Halliwell?" she asked.
"Yes, I am. How can I help you."
"Hiya sis, I'm Paige, your new long lost sister. I was sent here to tell you that the elders, who have now been taken over by Spelling Television, have relieved you of your duties as a Charmed one and you can now leave to pursue movie opportunities." When Prue didn't budge, Paige added, "Aaron Spelling is on his way here. You had better run away before he finds you!" Well, that got Prue into action. Prue ran at top speeds as if she was running the marathon again out of the manor and off the sound stage. Paige took a lick of her jawbreaker and walked into the house, kicking the door shut behind her. She entered the conservatory and nodded to each of her new sisters.
"Hi guys, I'm Paige. I'm the youngest Halliwell now and Piper, you are the oldest one since Prue left." She looked around at the decorations. "Nice place, sisters! Where do I sleep?"
"Oh, you can take Prue's room," Phoebe replied giddily and jumped up to help her new sister with her bags. Piper wasn’t so quick to get up.
"I just don't like how they went about this," she muttered and followed them.
The following night at P3, Piper was going crazy. She had scheduled 'Dead Pink' to perform, but the lead singer was no where to be found. Essentially, Piper was bandless on one of the busiest nights in P3's career. "What am I going to do?" she groaned and faced Phoebe and Paige.
"Hey, sis, I can hook you up. I've got me some connections," Paige grinned and motioned for Piper to freeze the building, to which she did. Paige concentrated her powers of materializing towards the stage and *poof!* Marilyn Manson appeared in his full, weird glory. When her sisters looked at her with stunned expressions, Paige shrugged. "Phoebe, you may have gotten around in New York, but I myself got around in California." When no recognition and understanding flashed in her sister's eyes, Paige added with a sigh, "I dated him a while back. Weird guy. Reminded me of the cult."
Piper and Phoebe decided to leave it just like that. Why go places where the media could for you?!
