Our favorite drama queen, Melissa, opens episode three by checking herself out in the mirror and announcing to the room that she is gonna get herself a man today. She tells everybody that things just don't seem right and she is sick of being around so many attractive, unavailable people in the house. In other words, nobody in the house is interested in our little drama queen, so she is going to put herself out there in the best way she can: loud and dramatic. The roomies go out to a club called "The boot bar and grill." In the confessional, Melissa admits that she has a problem: She needs boys to pay attention to her. Melissa gets her mack on outside with some frat guys. She asks them how old they are and one of the guys says 21 and the another guy says 19. Melissa calls them babies. The guys asks her how old she is, and she says 22. Almost old enough to be their mother, that Melissa is. "rolling eyes" She puts her hootchie infrared laser on a guy name Matt. She asks him is he in a frat and he tells her yes. She tells him that he doesn't look like a frat boy because he looks half-way normal. As you can see, she knows how to build up a man's ego. *smirk* She asks frat Matt if he had a little girlfriend, and he says he definitely doesn't. Melissa tells frat Matt (MTV's nickname for him) that he IS going to pick her up tomorrow, and he had better dress up appropriately because it WAS a date. And the little punk that frat Matt seems to be, he says ok. Melissa tells him she is leaving, and she walks off with the roomies. (I guess in the part we didn't see, Melissa gave frat Matt her name and address or he is a New Orleans voodoo doctor psychic.)

Real World Matt and Melissa are sitting in the room and he is looking at a picture of Melissa's old boyfriend. Melissa tells Real World that he is a drummer. In the confessional, Melissa says she just happens to date scruffy and strange white boys. Melissa tells Real World Matt that her old boyfriend was a 21 year old virgin. (a 21 year old virgin that is a drummer in a band?? Hmmmm, maybe he just wasn't trying to give HER none.) In the confessional, Melissa says that she can get the best of everything completely on her own.

The next day(I guess, who knows?) Danny answers the door and gets handed a priority mail letter. Kelley, Julie and him look at the outside of the envelope and see that it has to do with broadcasting. All the roomies gather around while Danny reads the letter from a guy named Elton, director of New Orleans access television operations. The letter informs them that they will be working with Elton at his production facility. The letter goes on to say that Elton wants to set up an initial meeting with the roommates to discuss their employment. Everybody is very excited. David thinks it is tight and says as long as it has to do with T.V, that's all he needs to hear. I guess he thinks the Real World is a radio show. Kelley thinks that an opportunity like this can help her career. Kelley tells somebody on the phone about the job and how she is going to take over Oprah's job. "For the exception of any talent or money, I think I can do it.", Kelley tells the other person on the phone. Ok, know she didn't, but I thought she should have.

The roommates go down to the production facility to meet Elton. Elton explains to them about the job. He tells them that they are going to produce a live T.V show. He tells them that he will not accept anything less than perfection from the roommates. Jamie asks Elton if they were actually going to do the producing and if there is going to be a training session. Elton explains to them that there will be a training session and they will be doing the production. Elton tells them to focus on content more than the technology side of it. The roommates find out that the show will be a weekly one. Kelley asks Elton if the next time they all meet up again, did he want them to have their ideas together and Elton answers yes. Jamie asks did they have access to a car, and Elton tells them to take a walk with him. They all walk out to a garage and go running to a GMC truck. They are all very excited. I think that David is thinking about all the honeys he can mack in the truck and what he can do to stop the roommates from wanting to ride……only an assumption.

Melissa is sitting in front of her mirror(what seems to be her favorite spot) putting a whole lot of makeup on, getting ready for her date with frat Matt. Jamie lets frat Matt in the house, and in the confessional, Melissa says that she is going to try new things because she is in a new place. Jamie asks frat Matt where he is taking Melissa, and he says he doesn't know, but she did mention that she had to run a few errands. WHAT? See, Melissa is one bold chick. And frat Matt is one dumb boy. If somebody were to ask me to run errands on what is supposed to be our first date, I would have to throw them a bus token and be on my way. Don't tell me Melissa asks this man to get dressed up nice so that the can go shopping?? Melissa and frat Matt leave for their date. Melissa is very impressed with frat Matt's car and tells him that she never went with anybody who had a car. She says she always had to pick up their dates because they were trifling men with no jobs.(too easy to comment on, so I won't.) She gets in frat Matt's car and tells him that they are official on a date. Spineless frat Matt says, "Ok". Hmmm, anyway, he asks her what did she want to do and she reads off an address. She tells him that she has to go get a new coat, but after that, it would be him and her. See, frat Matt, this is your chance to drop her off in front of the store and be out!! But you're a wimp. She asks frat Matt what his major is and he says he is a business major. She tells him that he is spoiled rotten and asks him has he ever had a job. He says he works only in the summer because his dad has a rule about working and going to school. Melissa tells him that she told her dad that she wanted a car and her dad told her she must want a job.(sounds like my mom when I was younger) They arrive at the coat store. Melissa walks in the place yelling, "It's me!!" She introduces frat Matt to the coat girl and asks him, "Isn't she cute?" Melissa told the coat girl that she told frat Matt that she(the coat girl) was cute and not to hit on her. The coat girl walks Melissa and frat Matt to the back to look at coats. Melissa tries on a coat that looks like a skunk on crack and the coat girl, who is evidently working for commission says, "It looks good on you!" Melissa says she needs a long coat to cover up her ghetto booty. She tries on another coat and decides that that was the one she wanted. Melissa and frat Matt leave to go get something to eat, and Melissa proclaims that she wants rice and that is all she eats. They go to a little deli and both order the same meal. Melissa jokingly says they must be in love. After frat Matt brings the food, she asks him how much it costs. He takes her coat and folds it up and puts it in the empty seat and she is shocked because nobody has ever done that for her. She tells him he is so nice and asks him why isn't he dating anybody. He says he was dating somebody for about a year, but it was over. They get up to leave and he puts her coat on her. She is in awe. She tells him he is "just the cutest thing" They are outside walking and he grabs her "doggy bag" and carries it, she tells him he is so nice that he is grossing her out. In the confessional, she says it is not like her to date somebody who opens doors for her and pays for everything. I don't know if she is happy by this or it is a turn-off for her. Maybe she is looking for a man to pimp slap her to show he cares, I don't know.

Melissa is back home telling Danny and Real World Matt about her date. She is surprised that frat Matt went out with her because she doesn't seem like his type. She says he doesn't seem to be in to her. Well, Melissa, if you would have let the poor guy get a word in edgewise, maybe he would have shown you some interest. Danny asks Melissa if frat Matt's family was loaded because he drove a nice car. In the confessional, Real World Matt says that Melissa is making it seem like her "relationship" with frat Matt is this big blown out drama. He doesn't feel they even know each other. In the confessional, Melissa says that she could date frat Matt, but she has to know he likes her and only her.

The roommates are getting ready to leave for work and they are very late. Julie is very tickled by the fact they are late. They get there and Elton is pissed. He sees Julie giggling and he says he doesn't think it is funny. The roommates give Elton their ideas for the show and he rebukes them and tells them to come up with another idea and work harder. In confessional, Kelley says that Elton is kinda a hard a**, but she feels that with him turning down their ideas, it will make them work harder to prove a point. Elton asks them who is going to produce the show, and the camera goes to Kelley's face. You can tells she wants the job, but it doesn't seem like the roommates have decided who is going to do what. Elton tells them they will meet again when they decide. Julie looks a little frustrated. In the confessional, she says she doesn't like Elton too much. On the ride home, Julie imitates Elton's strict ways and in the confessional she says that Elton thinks they are going to slack off and fail. She feels that even if they had come up with a good idea, Elton still would have told them to work harder.

Melissa is on the phone with frat Matt's friend, Warren. She is asking him what the plans were for the evening. He tells her they are going to nice places with older people, not like a college crowd. In the confessional, Melissa says that frat Matt is planning a birthday limo ride. Melissa asks Julie if she is going, and Julie says she will come. A shuttle bus comes to pick them up and Melissa comments that she thought it would be a limo. Melissa and Julie are in the bus with about 16 frat boys. And Julie is looking around like she is shocked she is there. They arrive at a restaurant and they all toast frat Matt's birthday. Frat Matt says he is thankful for his old friends and his new friends, Melissa and Julie. In the confessional, Melissa says that the evening started off cool, but she feels that guys like frat Matt and his friends don't like girls like her because she doesn't sip champagne and mingle. She feels like she can't be herself. Matt goes over and talks to their hostess for the evening, and Melissa is giving them the stank eye. She comments that her boobs look better than the hostess' and that her butt looks much better. Talking about insecure. She asks one of frat Matt's friends has he seen her butt and she stands up and shows him. Did she say she couldn't be herself?? Hmmm. In the confessional, she says that she doesn't know what to do with herself and she is scared all the time in situations. Maybe that is why she acts like she does. Frat Matt explains to Melissa that the girl was JUST the hostess, and Melissa is yawning and rolling her eyes. Matt tells her not to roll her eyes. In the confessional, Julie says that Melissa finds comfort in the attention of a guy like frat Matt. They get back on the shuttle bus and Melissa is dancing. "breaking out in a cold sweat because I am having flash backs of Melissa's rythmless dancing in the strip club in last week's episode" Ok, I'm ok, now……. Frat Matt and Melissa go back to the house and she asks Danny if the hot tub was hot, and Danny says , "Are you?" and she proceeds to do that little rythmnless dance again. Melissa and frat Matt go in the hot tub (after changing, of course) and frat Matt starts splashing. She whines and tells him to stop and he teases her for whining. He is grabbing her and asking her to come sit by him, and Melissa is getting upset because she feels that he is trying to come on to her. In the confessional, she says that he has never even asked anything about her life. She asks frat Matt doesn't he want to know anything about her, and he says, "Tell me a little about yourself." Ok, let me tell you, he could care less about knowing more about Melissa, and you can see that because he is still grabbing her and touching her. You see Kelley and Jamie watching Melissa and frat Matt in the hot tub, and they are shocked because they think that they are "getting it on". In the confessional, Melissa says that frat Matt was trying to get fresh with her, and she was grossed out. Melissa tells frat Matt that because he is rich, if the situations were different, he wouldn't like her. She asks him if he is rich, and he wants to know why that makes a difference. In the confessional, Melissa admits that frat Matt is very attractive, but she can't deal with spoiled frat boys in Gucci shoes. Ok, Melissa, you knew exactly how he was after your first date, why did you go out with him again if you "couldn't deal with it?" They get out of the hot tub and frat Matt asks Melissa can he look at Jamie's pictures. He wants her to come look at them with him, and Melissa asks in a sarcastic voice, "Do you want to make out?" and frat Matt says, "Do you?" And Melissa says, "No." Frat Matt says, "Good" She comments on his shoes and says she doesn't like boys who dress better than her. She walks him to the door and thanks her for being with him on his birthday. He gives her a big hug. You can tell he wants to kiss her, but she pushes him right out of the door and says "Call me when you get home." I don't understand how Melissa is getting so irritated with frat Matt. First of all, she came on to him. Second of all, if she doesn't like that type of man, why does she pursue it so much?? Ok, I am taking out my amateur psychology degree: I think that Melissa is ashamed of who she is, and she goes after guys she secretly envies. That could be completely wrong, but I think I am pretty close. (See what those T.V correspondence schools can teach you?) I think she should be proud of who she is.

The next morning, the roommates are rushing out the door to go to work. Jamie comments that Julie takes the longest to get ready. I am assuming that they weren't late this time because Elton didn't snap. Kelley is going to be the producer (no big surprise) and Danny is going to be the technical director. The workers there are explaining everything to the roomies, and Jamie admits he is getting a rush from the whole thing. Kelley admits it is a huge challenge, and she hopes to shine.

Kelley, Melissa and Jamie are sitting around and Kelley is getting ready to read Melissa's future using Tarot cards. Ok, let me just say, if you spent five minutes around Melissa, you could predict her future, but Melissa was very impressed that Kelley "predicted" hers. Later on, Melissa is telling Kelley, Julie and Danny that frat Matt dumped her. Julie wants to know if he dumped her today, and Melissa says he hasn't called her in three days so she feels like she is being dumped. Kelley says it is not considered getting dumped after one date, and Danny straight up tells her she got majorly dissed. Danny said he would have dissed her too if she didn't give him a kiss on his birthday. In the confessional, she says that she is embarrassed and that is what she gets for trying new things.

Melissa and Jamie are sitting around talking about her getting dumped. She says that had she met frat Matt in Miami, where she is from, he would not have paid her any mind. She feels that frat Matt would have snubbed his nose at her. Jamie feels that if Melissa and frat Matt lived somewhere like San Francisco, they would interact. Melissa tells Jamie under normal circumstances that her and Jamie wouldn't talk. Jamie tells her she is biased against certain people, and Melissa admits she is, but she feels that they are biased against her, also. Jamie tells her she can not group one set of people and label them. In the confessional, Jamie says that Melissa has issues with rich, white boys. He feels he is the embodiment of everything she hates.

Melissa calls frat Matt. Frat Matt asks her did she get his message about him being out of town. He also tells her that he is not sure about the whole situation with him and Melissa. Melissa tells him that she has had a bad attitude about him, too. She tells him that she feels used. In the confessional, she says that frat Matt is not attracted to her, but to what she represents by being on The Real World. She tells frat Matt that she is getting attention from people who wouldn't ordinarily give her attention. He tells her that if somebody is real with her, she will know, and if they are fake, she will also know. She tells him that he wouldn't like her in her regular setting, and he says, "Well, you wouldn't know that." Isn't that sort of admitting that he wouldn't?? In the confessional, she says that he has Gucci shoes and she is sitting around in her Target Jeans and she feels like it won't work out. Frat Matt tells her that he doesn't want to say goodbye forever, he wants to stay in touch. In the confessional, Melissa says she wants to feel like a prize because she deserves to be earned. Melissa goes in the room and tells Kelley, Danny, and Julie what happened on the phone. Danny tells her to get over it, and she says she is going to move on and it will be much easier to not speak to frat Matt again. She says that she should not be losing any sleep over this, and Danny says, "You are right, that is why you should be going to be right now." In other words, I am sick of hearing your s***, so please leave!

As the credits are rolling, Melissa is telling Danny and Kelley how she hates sex. She hates the panting and the sweat. She demonstrates how she is while she is having sex, and she says that once the sweat starts pouring, she is finished. This was probably the funniest part of this whole episode.

Ok, the winner of the "Get on my nerves" award would have to go to Melissa because she was about the only one in the whole episode. But actually, I felt a little sorry for her because instead of being who she is, she tries to hard to compensate where she feels she is lacking.

Until next time…..

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