Too Close

~Part 4

Author: Stephearth
Rating: R, Sexual situations, Adult situations
Category: Drama, Romance, Adventure, Angst (J/MP)
Archived on: March 26, 2000
Timeline: Post-"Donateresa"
Spoilers: "Donteresa" and mild "Amensia"
Summary: Miss Parker visits Jarod during his stay at the Centre and
things develop that may have fatal consequences
for both of them.

Author's Notes: This story is based on the wonderful Picture Challenge by
Emily to the fan fiction list: Pretendfic
at egroups . . . Enjoy!!! Do Not Archive without Permission. . .
Please 8^ ) Thanks!

Dedication: Well this one has to be dedicated to Emily, for creating
such an inspiring picture and challenge. But I'd
like to also dedicate this one to the wonderful and very kind
authors and fans of the Pretendfic list! You guys are simply wonderful!!!

Disclaimer: The characters portrayed in this fan fiction belong to NBC
and any other copyright holders. No infringement is intended.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The sweeper to Jarod's left pulled his arm hard, but he didn't care as they descended in the elevator. His mind was on Parker; he'd seen Mr. Parker standing outside of the SIM lab as the sweepers dragged him from the room. The look in his eyes made the knot in the pretender's stomach tighten and he was filled with concern for Miss Parker. What had he done? They'd done? They'd both been willing in the kisses shared between them. He had forced it to happen, sure. Pushed her into facing the intensity of the feelings between them, he had put her life at risk.

An hour ago it had seemed like the only thing to do. The only way to get beyond the unknown, the feelings he didn't quiet know what to do with. But he knew now as he watched the door to the elevator open, revealing yet another dark corridor in the Centre's sub-levels, that he should have waited, forced her into facing this bond between them outside of the Centre's walls. Maybe then things would have turned out differently. Jarod was brought out of his thoughts but a sharp jerk to his right arm as the sweepers pulled him into the dim hallway. Jarod was aware that they had stopped on a well-know level, sub-level 20, Isolation. They were punishing him, he had crossed the line, but it had felt good and he'd do it again, in a heartbeat. The pretender really didn't care what they did to him. He would survive; the Centre would not risk losing him, again. What concerned him was what they would do to Parker that worried him. He cursed this place for always having power over everything between them.

They pushed him further down the hall before coming to a rough stop in front of a small door. As the door opened Jarod struggled against the sweeper's hold. He hated being in isolation; he pulled hard against the sweeper on his right, pulling the tall man off balance slightly. He knew he could escape, it would just take time, but he couldn't fight the panic rising within him. The escape plan, he had to remember that he told himself. He had designed it to handle changes in location within the Centre's walls. After all, he knew the Centre well, and even if the meeting with Parker had simply turned into a screaming match he would be moved, they had to punish him somehow. The sweeper recovered instantly and with the aid of the other two men pushed Jarod into the dark room. As the door closed and the dim light from the corridor disappeared Jarod sat in the blinding dark on the cold floor. Time was on his side down here, so he sat there, suppressing the panic. Losing himself in the memory of what had happened in the SIM lab between Parker and himself. He brought a hand to his slightly swollen lips and traced them, he could still feel her, taste her, smell her. She was inside him now more then ever before, would be forever.

~*~*~*~

Parker sat in the brightly lit room, her eyes hurt, her back hurt, and she wanted to go home. She glanced down at her watch. Five and a half hours! Her mind screamed. They've kept me in this room for over five hours! She looked around for the hundredth time. Nothing, the room was starch white with intensely bright lights over head and a hard bench beneath her. She had paced the room for the first two hours, and then she had tried to calm herself down by staring out the small glass window at the darkened room beyond. She had finally allowed herself to sit down and rest. She was so tired, physically and emotionally. The entire time she had not allowed herself to think of Jarod, or the kisses they'd shared. She was fighting for her life now, no time to fantasize about the man who had brought her here. That wasn't entirely fair, she chided herself. She had let him get close to her, push her into the kisses and the feels. She couldn't be fair right now; she had to think about her own survival.

A T-board investigation had been called; she recognized the procedure from the last time she had to endure it. This time was decidedly worst, this time her loyalty was more then questioned. This time she wasn't waiting it out with Sydney and Broots, she'd give almost anything to have them with her now, even Broots in his pajamas. Anyone to draw strength from to kept her mind focused. She'd seen her father talking to the members of the Triumvirate earlier, trying to talk her out of trouble. Good, she thought, she needed all the help she could get at this point. What she allowed to happen between Jarod and herself was a stupid move.

Since leaving the SIM lab she had not allowed herself to think about Jarod, she couldn't let herself get distracted by that. She thought about herself. A little self-fishiness at a time like this was forgivable, she told herself. She questioned herself, chided herself and even cursed herself for letting him get to her. How could she have let her defenses fall. Allowed him to get to her, again. Because, she told herself, somewhere in the back of your heart or your mind you've always carried a flame for him. That's why he's able to hurt you, get to you, make you do things that know one else can. Parker sucked in a deep breath and let it out slowly. This was an argument she's had before, late at night, after he'd called and they'd talked about life and love. An argument she didn't' want to have anymore. She wanted to get away from this place, away from him, and away from all the pain and anger that consumed her everyday. Parker looked back up at the door, and she allowed for the first time, since they had taken him away from her, to think about the kisses.

She had felt so free then, so alive, and that scared her more then anything now. Parker had always believed in her heart that if she could get away from the Centre, find her own life outside of these walls, then she would be free, truly free. But like a freight train the realization that she had experienced the freedom she so long sought in the essence of the Centre's world. Jarod. The prized pretender was just that, the best pretender the Centre had ever had, the man who had allowed the Centre to grow into the force it was. That of course wasn't really his fault; he was a prisoner here just as she was, just as all of them were, but the constant irony of her life, hurt. One by one each of the new realizations twisting the dagger in her heart painfully deeper. Miss Parker was uncomfortable with that admission to herself, she got to her feet, pacing again.

The loud clanging of the lock being released stopped her, the door opened to reveal the sweeper that would take her to the board table. It was time to face them, she thought, inhaling a deep breath and steeling herself. Miss Parker step forward into the dark room, all of her defense were on full alert. She had decided somewhere in that room that she would offer no explanation for her actions. She would listen, it wouldn't matter what she said anyways. They had made their decision already; it was only a formality for them to see her.

~*~*~*~

Jarod was jerk violently awake when the loud clang of the door to his cell burst open, and the blinding light from the hallway flooded his small room. Jarod was still on the floor of his cell, having dozed off in this oubliette. When Jarod shook the drowsiness from his head he looked up to see the silouttes of three large sweepers, who burst into the cell and grabbed him. Following the burley men, a smaller fragile looking man entered, pulling his oxygen tank with him. The panic that invaded Jarod's body earlier came rushing into his being like a crashing wave. The sweeper's pulled Jarod to his feet and threw him against the nearby wall.

The audible wheezing of the man Jarod hated most in the world drew closer. For an instant Jarod shut his eyes but when the raspy voice of Raines broke the stillness he opened them again and stared into the lifeless eyes of his tormentor. "Aaaah, Jarod," the horse voice sounded like knives in his chest, "Its time you came with me." Jarod watched as the bony hand rise, a string between his fingers. Jarod began to struggle, violently.

Raines backed away from the desperate man's fight until the sweepers had him under control again. Jarod was panting hard with his exsertions. Jarod fought with all his strength, but to no avail. The men were strong, rested and fed. All of which Jarod had been denied for many hours, even his short nap had not refreshed him. Jarod focused on the needle in Raines's hand as he slowly approach him again. "Noooo . . . No!" Jarod fought again, trying to twist in the hold, "aaaaaahhhhhh!!" the needle sunk deep into his upper arm. The unknown contents of the needle burned into his arm. The effect was instantaneous. Jarod felt his resistance weakened, his body felt heavy. Jarod was vaguely aware of the Sweeper's iron grips loosening as he slipped to the floor, unconscious.

Raines's sucked in a shallow breath and rasped, "Bring him." He turned and left the room, oxygen tank squeaking behind him. The sweeper's dragged an unconscious Jarod from the cell following the madman.

~*~*~*~

The sweeper instructed her to sit at the end of the long narrow table. Parker scanned the room, taking in all of the shadows. Her heart ached and she silently asked for strength. The three members of the Triumvirate sat at the opposite end to the room, a single lamp illumined above the woman in the middle. Brigitte sat in a high-backed chair off to the left of the board member's table. Miss Parker had a strong sense of deja vu. The room looked exactly as it had before, with one exception. A DSA player sat in front of her on the table. Parker sucked in a deep breath and stared up at the three members. Stay calm, she told herself.

"Miss Parker, thank you for joining us at this late hour," the female member spoke slowly. "An incident has come to our attention that needs to be addressed."

Parker unconsciously held her breath as she continued, "Please watch the following DSA sequence then we will discuss this situation further." The older woman nodded her head to the sweeper who then leaned over the table and started the machine.

Parker's eyes widened as the player came to life. She felt as if she would throw up what little contents were left in her stomach, from the barely edible meal they'd serviced her, as the DSA replayed a short sequence from the SIM lab that she and Jarod had met in earlier. The scene it played out was unreal to Miss Parker; she hadn't realized that she actually fought him. At the time, Parker had been unable to think straight, Jarod had simply been too close to her for your mind to work properly. Miss Parker watched as Jarod cornered her against the wall. Funny, she thought, it seemed a whole lot darker in the lab then it looks on the DSA.

Miss Parker stared at the DSA as the sweeper leaned forward to pause it on the scene. Her eyes scanned the screen. Jarod seemed so big, her own form so small, so lost. She hated that, and somewhere in her heart Parker thought that maybe they had purposely frozen it on this scene, to torment her. She looked so weak and helpless in her eyes. Jarod's arm was near her head blocking her from getting away from him. The gray tones of the DSA's screen highlighting and hiding everything. Parker read the small text at the bottom left-hand side of the screen: Jarod For Centre Use Only. Of course, she chided herself, now she'd be apart of his file forever. But, she reminded herself, she already was. They had many of her visits on file already, this wasn't really different, but to her it was. This had been their moment and yet it wasn't. The Centre took it away from them and now they were rubbing it in her face. Using it against her, in a way threating her, reminding her of the mistake she'd made with Centre property.

Miss Parker looked up at the woman that was watching her. Her face was cold and unreadable. Marked by lines of age and experience, hair streaked slightly with silver threads. Parker kept her concentration on the woman's face. There was no going back she told herself, what she'd done with Jarod was forever a part of her life and she would have to live with it, provided she lived through the T-board.

One of the male members cleared his throat breaking the tense silence and Miss Parker briefly looked into the shadows where the man sat, then back at the woman as she spoke. "Now, Miss Parker we are aware that the last several weeks have been rather stressful for you. Sustaining a gun shot wound and the events surrounding the capture of the pretender --Jarod." The older woman shifted some folders on the desk before she continued, "Your father and colluges have suggested that you take some time off and this board agrees."

Miss Parker held her breath, she could not believe what she was hearing! They were chalking her recent indesgresstion up to stress? They kept her waiting in that room for over five and a half hours while they decided she was to stressed out? She sat their somewhat stunned. She wandered exactly what her father and Sydney had said to them before silently thanking them for it. Her faces still held no expression as she listened to the female member continue. Its time for the sentence, she thought sarcastically.

"We have decided to grant you three days leave. No pay, but considered this a warning to keep your actions within Centre policy." The older woman gathered up the file folders and pushed back the chair slightly, "This leave will take effective immediately. Upon returning you will be placed on Mr. Lyle's team to locate and capture Major Charles and the pretender --Gemini. This meeting is adjured." The members rose to their feet and left the room leaving Parker stunned and unable to move. She could not believe how easy she had gotten through this. Parker herself had watched the DSA and had acknowledged that from a somewhat outside perspective it did look as if Jarod had orchestrated the entire thing but she knew better. She had allowed it to happen, and had enjoyed every second of it. Suddenly a fear rose within her. The board members had said she was to be under Lyle's authority, that she was now assigned to hunt down the Major and Jarod's clone. She wasn't free . . . they weren't granting her the freedom that came with the capture of Jarod.

Mr. Parker came toward his daughter, "Angel, I think it's best if you gather your things and go home. You look exhausted and need to rest." Parker looked up into his eyes. The disgust she'd seen in them hours before was gone, replaced with concern and even a hint of love. She rose to her feet and left the room, heading for her office. Her father was right, she needed to get home, before she broke down and cried, before her defenses dropped and she fell apart. Before the stresses that had been building up in her since she walked into that SIM lab caught up with her.

Moments later she entered her office, not allowing herself to stop moving. If she did she was sure she would break down. I need to get home, ran through her head like a mantra. She grabbed her purse, brief case, gun, and cell phone from her desk. She wasn't sure exactly how many hours she'd gone without sleep but she felt very tired all of a sudden. As she moved to the door again she was stopped but a very concerned look from Sydney. He reached out his hand and placed it on her shoulder in a comforting gesture. "Miss Parker are you alright?" He tried to look into her eyes but she closed them when he put his hand on her shoulder.

A moment later she opened them and spoke, "No, Syd I'm not. I'm very tired and I need to get home." She pushed past him and headed for the elevator. Sydney followed her.

"Miss Parker would you like me to drive you home? You don't look like your . . . ." Sydney's deep accented voice trailed off and the softness of it cut through to her heart. He was one of the few people who could do that and right now she need that comfort.

As the elevator door opened and Parker when inside she quietly said, "Yes, Sydney that would be very nice." Sydney did not need further invitation, he climbed into the elevator and pressed the "up" button.

~*~*~*~

Jarod's first conscious thought was that he was laying face down on the cold, hard floor. With a moan he pushed to his side, muscles screaming in protest. He hurt and he couldn't tell exactly which muscles were strained, he seemed to hurt all over. He felt sick to his stomach, and with a loud groan he pushed over onto his back, weakly. He wondered how many hours had passed. Time was not important in the Centre, not that he could see to read a clock or a wristwatch the darkness was absolute. Jarod lifted his hands to cover his face, rubbing his pounding temples. Jarod felt the lingering effects of the drugs dissipating from his body. What had they done to him? He couldn't remember. The last clear memory he had was of the wheezing breath of Raines as he turned and left his room. Had it been hours? Days?

A new determination arose in him. He had to get out of the Centre, now! Slowly he got to his wobbly feet. He crossed the small room to the wall, placed his palms against the cold concrete he began searching for a vent, or some other means of escape.

~*~*~*~

Sydney did not speak the entire way to Parker's house. He could sense she wasn't willing to talk about what had happened in the SIM lab or in the T-broad meeting, so he didn't push. She would talk about it when she was ready.

Miss Parker sat in the car as Syd drove, unable to think, her mind was numb and her body felt like it wasn't attached. All she knew was that she wanted a shower and sleep. They were two very simple things. When Sydney pulled into her drive way she got out of the car and walked to the door. Miss Parker mumbled a thank you to Sydney and went inside her house. Once inside she leaned against the door, instantly locking it, and stood against it for a long moment for the physical support.

Taking a ragged breath she allowed herself to relax a little. Pulling herself from against the door she walked, pulling the clothes from her tired body, to the bathroom. Reaching the bathroom she remained only in her bra and panties, having striped the rest on her way. Turning on the shower she slipped off the rest of her clothes and got under the hot spray. As the water flowed over her tired body she let a protective defense wall drop and with it some of the emotions she had lock away flooded her being. Miss Parker leaned against the tiled wall and began to sob. So much feeling was released in that single barrier, so much intense emotions came up in her that her entire body was racked with sobs.

Miss Parker had no idea how long she stayed in the shower sobbing but when the water began to turn cold and the sobs reseeded she got out, dressed in a night shirt and panties, and climbed into bed. She was so exhausted that she was barely able pulled the covers to her waist. Miss Parker pushed her head into the pillows and fell into an exhausted sleep.

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