Jack made small pacing movements in the corner of the infirmary, occasionally stopping to pound a fist against the wall. He tried not to focus on the sounds coming from beyond the curtain surrounding Daniel’s bed. It had been nearly twelve hours since he had spoken with Sam and Teal’c. There still wasn’t any news there.

Pausing momentarily to pound his fist against the wall again and trying to block out the half choking, half gasping sounds coming from Daniel’s bed, he didn’t hear the low electrical crackling sound or see the faint blue glow coming from the bed nearby.

Rubbing his temple he tried to think about what had just happened. He had been sitting beside Daniel’s bed talking about nonsense things when Daniel had started to gasp. At first he thought Daniel was waking up but that thought quickly fled as several of the monitors started alarming and he realized that Daniel couldn’t breath. Janet had been in her office and had run out just as he started yelling for help.

Jack looked up just as the curtain was pulled back emitting Janet, “Doc, how is he? Is he…”

Janet held up her hand and Jack immediately quieted, “It was touch and go there for a second but we managed to get the breathing tube down and it’s working fine now.”

Janet could tell that her news was devastating to O’Neil and she really wished that she didn’t have to say what she had to say next, “Colonel, Jack, it might be time for you to start thinking about some difficult decisions.”

He quickly turned away from her but not before she saw the anguish in his eyes. “I’m not pulling the plug.”

“Jack…”

“No!” Jack snapped his head around and looked her right in the eyes, “As long as there is a chance that Sam will find the right planet and you can keep him alive I’m not doing that!”

Nodding, Janet gave his arm a comforting squeeze, “Ok. It’s your decision. I’ll be in my office if you need me.”

Jack pushed past the curtain only to be confronted with the reality of his decision. Daniel lay on the bed, pale and gaunt, IVs running into both arms, thin wires running from beneath the blanket to various pieces of equipment surrounding the bad. He winced as he made note of the newest piece of machinery, the ventilator. It’s thick plastic tube narrowing where it was taped, entering Daniel’s mouth. Jack pushed past his shock and edged around the bed to Daniel’s head, “Daniel, you have to trust me, ok? Daniel, I order you not to give up. You hear me Danny? No one dies until I say so. You got that? No one dies, Danny.”

Hearing the one sided conversation, Sergeant Anderson turned away from the still curtain.

Two days later Jack sat listening to the soft whir of the ventilator as it pumped life giving oxygen into Daniel’s lungs. He watched as Daniel’s chest rose and fell with each false breath. Janet had already told him that medically Daniel was considered brain dead and that his body just didn’t know it yet. Teal’c had mentioned that even if a sarcophagus could be found it may not work at this point and he finally had to agree that Daniel was gone.

The lights had been dimmed and Teal’c had placed a lit candle on the bedside table. Earlier he had spent several hours meditating beside Daniel. He called it Kel’Not’Whatever. Jack understood it was suppose to cleanse the spirit and help the departed in their journey to the next life or something.

After Teal’c had finished, Janet leaned over and whispered a few words into his ear and even the General came down and bade him goodbye. Jack had tried to coax Sam out of her lab but she wouldn’t stop working until the very end. Janet and Teal’c couldn’t get her to stop either. Not even Janet’s threat to sedate her had worked.

Jack shook his head. He would have to find her as soon as it was over. He stood up and brushed Daniel’s hair away from his face. How the kid could stand it in his face all the time he could never understand. He remembered countless times he had teased him about it, telling him he should get a real haircut. Jack leaned down so that only Daniel could hear him, “Danny, I know what I said but if it’s too much, just let go. Ya’ hear me, Danny? If it’s too hard, don’t fight anymore. Just let go.”

Jack straightened up and took a deep breath before slowly letting it out. He looked across the bed and nodded his head. He closed his eyes as he heard the flick of the switch that would cut the power to the ventilator keeping Daniel alive.

Jack sat beside the bed watching his friend. He didn’t really want to be here but he couldn’t leave. He didn’t want Daniel to die alone, even if it meant he was the one to stay. He had heard the others leave, Janet probably off blaming herself somewhere and Teal’c no doubt went to keep an eye on Sam. Daniel’s chest continued to rise and fall, momentarily broken by uneven breaths.

”Sam really wanted to be here, Danny. I know she would have wanted to say goodbye. Don’t worry though. She’ll be ok, Teal’c went to take care of her…"

He looked down at the hand he was holding. It was pale and thin and very still…so different from normal. Jack remembered hands that could express the awe of holding something that hadn’t been held in over two thousand years or the excitement of discovering a new culture or the frustration of dealing with…him, only to yield to the kindness of friendship as a joke set in…

“Teal’c is having a hard time trying to watch out for all of us. He won’t admit it but I think he does it to keep from feeling anything for now. He’s taken it as his personal mission to watch after Sam…You know her, she wouldn’t eat if he didn’t make her…She’s really taking this hard, Danny…”

Jack looked over at the monitor to his right. The slow blip of the readout was monitoring the stilling of his best friend’s heart. Best friend…Who would ever have thought that. Jack O’Neil, wise-cracking, arrogant, Air Force Colonel, ending up with a geeky, side-kick Anthropologist for a best friend. A genius one at that.

“You know you’re my best friend right? I just…I’m sorry I never told you that…”

Leaning down Jack brushed the long blond hair back for the last time as he rested his forehead against Daniel’s. Daniel’s breaths were coming much more slow and unevenly now. He had always thought the hardest thing he would ever have to see was the loss of good soldiers, sometimes friends in the line of duty. He had been so wrong. The hardest thing anyone could ever have to do is sit, holding his best friend’s hand as he quietly slipped away.

“Goodbye, Spacemonkey…”

Daniel’s chest fell for the last time followed a few moments later by the stilling of the heart monitor. No alarm sounded though. Janet had turned it off earlier. Jack stayed like that, with his forehead silently resting against Daniel’s, as still as his friend. Tears tracked down the colonel’s cheeks, dropping onto Daniel, only to roll off like Daniel himself was crying at the unjustness of it all.

“…I’m sorry.”

Jack wrapped his arms around his silent friend, pulling him up against the warmth of his own chest, ignoring the pull of IVs and other medical equipment, “No!” Rocking back and forth he let go the pent up emotions of the last week, loudly sobbing in the darkness of the infirmary, “I’m sorry…I’m so sorry…Please don’t go…I was wrong…You hear me! I was wrong…”

Sam blinked in the near darkness. Placing her hands on the table she slowly lifted her head away from the cool surface. She shook her head to clear it and pressing a button on her watch, glanced at the time. It was almost two in the morning.

She didn’t remember falling asleep but then she didn’t remember turning down the lights either. Standing up, she stretched the kinks out of her muscles and stumbled toward the light switch.

“Don’t…”

Sam turned sharply at the voice and backed toward the door. She glanced around the lab but couldn’t make out anyone in the dimness. “Who’s there?”

Something shattered to her left and she stopped, “Who are you? What do you want?” She stretched her hand out and fumbled with the instruments on the counter, trying to find something that she could use in case the unknown person attacked. Hearing slight shuffling noises, she backed away once more. Now she was close enough to the light switch that she could…

“Please, don’t…”

She had turned the lights up enough to vaguely identify the intruder. He was tall, long hair…and the voice…”Daniel…?” As she let go of the switch the light came on a bit further. It was still dim but now she could clearly make out the person in front of her…

“Samantha.”

Sam caught her breath. “Daniel! Oh my God!” Sam sprang across the few feet separating them. Flinging her arms around his neck she began to laugh, almost hysterically, “What…I mean…how…Oh God…”

She felt his arms around her, the gentle way he caressed her back…Burying her face in his shoulder she began to sob, the laughter giving way to the stress she had placed herself under while trying to find his cure. Wiping her eyes with the back of her hand she pulled out of his arms and gently ran her hand through his hair, down his cheek, his arms…”Daniel…How…how is this possible?”

She could hear the awe in her own voice and laughed again at the wonder of what was happening. She blinked as he brought his hand up to her cheek and brushed away a tear that she had missed.

“Samantha, what is wrong?”

Shaking her head, her smile faded, “Samantha?”

“We wish to understand.”

She backed away as his hand came back up to caress her cheek, “What?”

“It is all right, Samantha. We wish to understand.”

Sam shook her head as she tried to back away. Something was wrong, how did Daniel get here and why did he keep calling her ‘Samantha’…She was stopped as his grip on her arm tightened, “Who are you?”

“We are Daniel, Samantha. We wish to understand.”

Sam pulled away but was held fast, “No! Please!” The last thing she heard was a faint crackling sound…like eletricity…

“…Come on…Sam!” Jack gently slapped her face. He had arrived only seconds before and had been shocked to find her unconscious on the floor. “Come on…Wake up, Sam…” He breathed a sigh of relief as her eyes opened, “Sam?”

“Sir…?”

Jack put his arm around her shoulders as she tried to sit up. He watched as she looked around the lab, “Where…where’s Daniel?”

“Sam…I…I’m sorry, Sam. Daniel’s gone.”

He watched as the statement sank in. Her eyes staring at him as if he were crazy, “How could you say that?”

Confused by the anger directed at him, Jack tried to think of something to say…

“Daniel’s not dead!” Sam laughed at the ridiculous statement, “Daniel’s…He was here…he was…” She saw him flinch at the mention of the name, “Sir! He was here!” Glancing around the lab she looked for any sign of their missing friend before turning back to Jack, “I swear it Jack. He was here. You have to be mistaken.”

Not knowing what else to do, Jack just nodded and helped her off the floor, “Uh, why don’t we go see Janet? Ok, Sam?”

Still shaking her head and upset that Jack didn’t believe her, she began straitening her uniform.

“Sam…Janet?”

Meeting his eyes, she saw that he was seriousness in his beliefs about Daniel as well as his worry for her, “Yeah, ok.” She glanced around the lab one more time before switching off the light. Comforted by Jack’s hand on her back, her thoughts ran into confusion as she tried to remember what had happened…

Sam rested fitfully. She kept turning over recent events in her mind, now half convinced that seeing Daniel had been a dream. She had thought it was real, it had felt real…but then…she shook her head as she tried to recall exactly what had happened. She didn’t remember anything beyond hugging Daniel. Nothing to give her any indication that it had all been anything but a dream. Jack was right…Maybe she had just imagined the whole thing…maybe it was her mind playing tricks on her, denying the truth, refusing to give up or let go…refusing to admit that she had failed and now Daniel was dead because of it.

She couldn’t bring herself to sleep and so she found herself silently staring at the ceiling. She had feigned sleep for a while, just long enough to convince Jack and Janet that she was in no danger of going loony tunes again. She couldn’t shake the image of Janet’s hurt expression when she had insisted that they were wrong about Daniel and that she had seen him in her lab. Nor the anger in Jack’s eyes as he released her to the doctor’s care. Sam wondered whom he had been angry with the most, her for not finding a cure, himself for his own futility in the situation, or Daniel for…dying. She had watched as he stormed out of the infirmary and at that moment it had begun to sink in that Daniel really was gone.

What would they do now? What was SG-1 without it’s conscience? Would the mission just go on? Without Daniel? A tear slid down her cheek and she before could berate herself, a memory surfaced…

//”I know I’, supposed to stay detached…” “Who told you that?”//

Jack wondered the halls of the SGC. He had never felt so tired as he did now. Tired of everything. Tired of making the decisions. Tired of not having the answers. Tired of losing friends…just tired. Sometimes, like now, he thought maybe it would have been better if he had ended it all that first time he went through the ‘gate…

//”I don’t want to die and I know that your men don’t want to die…it’s such a shame that your in such a hurry to…”//

Jack slammed his fist against the cold metal wall. Daniel…Sam…He pounded the wall with fury. He didn’t even feel the pain as the bone broke…

Teal’c made sure that O’Neil was seated in the infirmary before he went to discuss the matter with Dr. Fraser. He did not understand these Tau’ri sometimes. They were the last best hope for peace in the universe yet they were an emotional people. He understood grief. It was a part of him, just as it was a part of O’Neil and had been a part of Daniel Jackson. However, fighting with a wall could not bring back their young friend. Now was the time for remembrance, later they would honor his memory by defeating that which he fought so long and hard against, their enemy the Goa’ould. That was the only way that he knew to serve his friend now.

Janet carefully wrapped the tape around the extended fingers. She had been stealing glances at the man before her the entire time it took to set the bones and she looked at the man before her, really looked. She could see the grief, anger, and self-loathing in the man before her. She didn’t even try to kid herself into thinking that there was anything she could say or do to change it…”Well, Colonel, you’re lucky…”

“Yeah, lucky…”

She let the sarcasm roll by as she cut the tape and tucked the end under, “Yeah, lucky. You could have done some serious damage there. As it is, you broke two fingers and fractured a third.” Jack just shrugged as he hopped off the bed. “Thanks Doc.”

She watched him leave. Sighing, she wished there were something more she could do. Her thoughts were interrupted by an airman holding up a phone receiver…

George Hammond placed the phone receiver back on its carriage. Leaning back in his leather chair his thought turned over the events of the past week. What a tragedy…He had truly cared about that boy. Yes, he could be a pain in the ass sometimes but …well, he was usually right in the end and he had a way of endearing himself to damn near everyone. It constantly amazed him how many times Daniel had saved their collective asses, and not just the SGC either, the whole damn planet. Yeah, he was going to miss that boy around here.

Word had spread like wildfire. The grapevine in the SGC was just as swift and all inclusive as any at any other base he had ever been, maybe more so. It had taken less than an half an hour from the time Daniel Jackson had arrived on base until the time he was firmly planted in the infirmary with orders to rest. It had taken less than twice that amount of time for everyone from the gate guards to the janitor to know that not only had a certain errant anthropologist been confined to the infirmary but also that a certain Colonel was standing at attention in this very office, a certain Captain was frantically searching for an answer, and a certain Jaffa was standing sentinel over said anthropologist. And for a while just having Daniel back and knowing that the SGC’s number one team was working on the situation was enough to boost morale. Sometimes it’s all about taking care of your own…

Sometimes, things just don’t work out. Morale hit an all time low with the news that they had lost the battle and a good friend. He considered his options and determined that it was time to call in some help. Many under his command were distressed at this turn of events and he thought it best to have help on hand for anyone who felt they needed it, even of it was just a need to talk about all that happened. He had first called Dr. McKenzie in and asked him to arrange to have someone from his area available at all times to offer counseling or whatever was needed to get the SGC though this. It was shortly after that that he had received the first phone call. At first he had thought it only confirmed his conclusion that Daniel’s death had affected some deeply. Then he got another call, and another, and another…

That was when he had called Janet Fraser. It seems that Captain Carter is not the only one making contact with the recently departed Dr. Daniel Jackson…

As Teal’c walked the halls of the SGC he noticed a bustle of activity. He passed several airmen who appeared to be conducting a thorough search of the area. Stopping momentarily he questioned one such airman in regards to the increased activity. After a quick conversation he thanked the young man as he resumed his endeavor to reach the infirmary with renewed haste.

Upon entering the dimly lit infirmary, he spotted O’Neil sitting beside Captain Carter’s bed. Relieved to finally find the object of his until now futile search he made his way to his friends.

Stepping close, he nodded as they stopped their quiet conversation to greet him. He looked closely at his friends and could see that the death of Daniel Jackson as well as his previous illness had taken a toll of both of them. Captain Carter appeared…frail. He had never thought that word could be applied to her but after enduring the long hours of stress without proper rest or nutrition she did indeed appear…frail. O’Neil did not appear to be in much better condition. Teal’c was aware of the long hours he had spent beside Daniel Jackson and the pain that he inflicted upon himself, both physically and mentally.

He considered what his next words should be. He would tell them of the search being conducted and of its reasons according to the young airman he had questioned. He was not blind to the delicacy of the situation and for an instant, as he looked upon their faces again and saw the pain there, he thought of not telling them. In his moment of indecision, the choice was taken from him.

“Colonel. Captain.” George Hammond walked steadily across the room, “Teal’c.”

“General Hammond.” Teal’c nodded his greeting as the man stepped closer. He knew his chance to inform his friends of the situation had been lost. He also knew that the General would not break the news harshly and so he stepped back, relinquishing his place next to O’Neil.

“General, and to what do we owe this visit?”

George turned to the man beside him and upon registering his somewhat haggard appearance decided to let the tone in his last comment go. “Colonel, I’m here to inform you of a situation that is occurring as we speak.” He glanced back down at the figure on the bed, “Captain, I’m here to set some things I know you must be thinking at ease. It seems that you are not the only one to have seen Dr. Jackson.” He glanced around the small group as he watched this bit of information sink in. He immediately noticed that Teal’c did not seem surprised, “Teal’c?”

Teal’c nodded in acquiescence, “I have already been informed of the situation.”

“All right, enough of these games! What are you talking about?”

Sam placed a hand on Jack’s arm to quiet him, “Sir, what…?”

The General let out a deep breath, “As you all know, Dr. Jackson died at 11:58 last night. Captain Carter, you claim to have seen him at 2 AM. Now, between the hours of 2 AM and 5 AM I received numerous calls from personnel all over the base reporting that they have seen Dr. Jackson.”

“For crying out loud…”

“Hold on, Colonel.” The General held up a hand to forestall the coming argument, “I know what you’re going to say and I’ve already had Dr. Fraser check.”

“And?”

Clearing his throat, the General looked straight at Jack as he gave him his answer, “And it would seem that Dr. Jackson’s…body…is missing.”

Sam sat up in the bed, “Missing, Sir?”

“We have people all over the base, searching. They haven’t found anything yet.”

“Sir, with all due respect, it wasn’t a…a…body…that I saw. It was Daniel. And he was as alive as we are.”

The General turned back to her, “We’re looking into that possibility as well, Captain.”

It had been nearly two hours since General Hammond’s announcement in the infirmary. It hadn’t taken much to convince Janet to let Sam go and soon they were all involved in the search. They had decided to split up and search but had ‘acquired’ some hands-free radios so they could keep in contact.

Jack leaned into yet another darkened room, “Anything yet, Sam?”

//Negative, Sir.//

“Teal’c?”

//There is nothing, O’Neil.//

“Ok, well, keep looking. O’Neil out.”

Jack readjusted the headset and looked at his watch, 7:30 AM. Rubbing a hand over his eyes and through his hair he shook himself trying to wake up a bit. It had been a long night. He wandered down the corridor trying doors and looking into empty rooms, searching but never finding. Twenty minutes later he jumped as Teal’c’s voice burst into his ear.

//O’Neil.//

“Jeez…Yeah, Teal’c?”

//I have found something.//

“What? Daniel?”

//I am uncertain.//

“What do you mean? Why…?”

//I am outside Daniel Jackson’s office. There are noises from within. I thought you would prefer to enter.//

“Uh, thanks Teal’c. I’ll be right there. Tell Carter. O’Neil out.” Taking a deep breath to steady his nerves, he set off in a run towards Daniel’s office.

Jack pushed the door open just enough to see through. The office was dimly lit but Jack could still recognize the man moving about the small space. It was a sight he never thought to see again…

“Daniel?”

Pushing the door open, Jack stepped into the room followed by Teal’c and Sam. Jack glanced back at them, uncertainty clearly written on his face. Daniel had not stopped his movement around the small room nor had he even so much as glanced up at their presence.

Taking a deep breath, Jack stepped a little closer to Daniel, “Danny?” He almost fell over as Daniel’s head jerked towards him.

“Jack.”

Jack was only a few steps away from him now and he could see that there was no recognition of him in Daniel’s eyes. The last shred of hope he held died then. “Who are you?”

“We are Daniel.”

He felt Sam’s hand on his shoulder, then her quiet voice, “We…”

Quickly raising his sidearm, he pointed it at the being now in control of Daniel’s body. With a slight turn of his head, he nodded at Teal’c who immediately left the room to alert General Hammond of an intruder. “Again, who…are…you?”

Daniel looked confused by the question, “We are…Daniel.”

“What have you done to Daniel? Why are you here?” There was anger in Jack’s voice now, “What do you want?”

‘Daniel’ stepped closer to Jack and held out his arm, “We wish to understand.”

Sam jerked Jack’s arm back, pulling him out of reach from whoever or whatever ‘Daniel’ was. “Sir, that’s what he said just before I was knocked out. He touched me and the next thing I remember you were waking me up.”

Jack took a few steps back keeping his gun raised, “Ok, I don’t know what you are or what you want, but you have until three to get out of my friend…”

Daniel looked curiously at them, He reached out a hand to the weapon pointing at him, blue sparks arced around his hand for just a second accompanied with a slight crackling noise.

Jack tiltled his head as he heard the sound, he had heard that sound before but…where…//we mean no offense…we…// Jack tightened his grip on the gun, “That was you! Who the f*** are you?!”

“Sir?”

Jack nodded his head at ‘Daniel’, “Whatever it is, it was in Anderson earlier. It wanted to know why we didn’t just let Daniel die.” Projecting his voice back at ‘Daniel’ he angrily shouted, “Is that why you wanted him to die?! You wanted his body?! What are you?!”

‘Daniel’ stepped back at the harsh words, “We have said. We are Daniel. We wish to understand.”

“You bastard…”

“Sir!” Sam could see that the colonel was not handling the situation very well. She stepped forward, “Let me…” She waited for him to look at her before she nodded towards ‘Daniel’, “Let me see if I can fins out anything…” Seeing him nod slightly, she stepped past him and held her hands out to her sides, hoping to project a non-threatening image. “You keep saying ‘we are Daniel’.”

‘Daniel’ took a step forward and nodded once.

“Who were you before you were in Daniel? Is Daniel still alive inside you somewhere?”

The air around ‘Daniel’ was suddenly lit by arcs of blue electricity. “Daniel is here. We are Daniel.”

Sam could tell that she was not going to get any better answer than that. She picked up on the only other bit of information she had, “You said you want to understand? What? What is it that you want to understand?”

More electricity sparked along his body. “We wish to understand…this…” He placed a hand on his chest.

“What…?” She thought about all of the first contacts they had ever made and how Daniel would try to communicate…”Humans?! You want to understand humans?”

Another spark of electricity, a nod. “Yes. We wish to understand.”

Sam was happy at the slight yet important breakthrough. “You said that you are Daniel…that he is here…”

“Yes.”

“Is he still here?…within you?”

“Yes. Daniel is here.”

“Can I talk to him?”

There was a long silence. “He is unable.”

“Why?” Sam shook here head, “Why is he unable?”

“He must not feel more pain.”

Sam frowned. She didn’t know what that meant. She didn’t know what she was doing and she was afraid of making a mistake. A fleeting thought wondered if this is how Daniel felt every time they encountered a new culture…”Uh...but he’s still here, right?”

“Yes.”

“Um…Pain…Is there pain? Are you in pain?”

“We do not feel pain.”

“Ok,” Sam was running out of ideas. “You said you want to understand humans…what about them?”

There was another long pause filled only by the sound of electricity, “We wish to know why.”

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