Batman: "People who stay in glass hotels shouldn't throw parties."
Batman: "I did think it would all end differently, somehow less ignominiously. To drown in my own anniversary cake!"
Bruce: "It's sometimes difficult to think clearly when you're strapped to a printing press."
Bank Manager: "Thank goodness you're here, Batman! Two girl bank robbers just robbed my bank while the policewomen did nothing. And then they took off into thin air in a getaway car..."
Batman: "Sometimes you can see a great deal in thin air, Sir."
Batman: "Since there is no life on Mars as we know it, there can be no intelligible Marsish language."
Batman: "Whatever is fair in love and war is also fair in crimefighting."
Batman: "A reporter's lot is not easy, making exciting stories out of plain, average, ordinary people like Robin and me."
Robin: "Gosh, Batman, is there anything you don't know?"
Batman: "Oh yes, Robin. Several things, in fact."
Batman: "How little do we know of time, Alfred. A one-syllable word, a noun. Yesterday's laughter, tomorrow's tears."
Batgirl: "How can I help?"
Batman: "By standing directly under that grating and concentrating on the Indian Fakir command, Rassi Seedha Rucko. Hindi for 'Rope stay straight'."
Batman: "I'd rather die than beg for such a small favor as my life."
Robin (about Mad Hatter): "But when you testified against him at his last trial, he said he'd get you if it was the last thing he ever did."
Batman: "Few men die of threats, Robin."
Robin: "You were right, Batman, we might have been killed."
Batman: "Or worse."
Catwoman: "If I were to kiss you, would you think I was a bad girl?"
Batman: "Bu...uh...no...No of course not Catwoman."
Batman: "I'll do everything I can to rehabilitate you." Catwoman: "Marry me." Batman: "Everything except that."
Catwoman: "I could give you more happiness than anyone in the world." Batman: "How do you propose to do that?" Catwoman: "By being your partner in life, I mean it's me and you against the world." Batman: "What about Robin?"
Batman: "At the risk of sounding conceited, young lady, we're not just anyone."
Bruce: "Yes, I think I should be running along as well, Barbara. Uh, it wouldn't be proper for the two of us to be here alone in your apartment without a chaperone."
Batman: "What's your name?" Molly: "Molly." Batman: "You interest me, strangely."
Marsha: "You mean you're not in love with me?" Batman: "I'm not even mildly interested."
Batman: "The red speck appears to be chile and the green speck is avocado. Do you know what that means?"
Batman puzzling over a clue: "It must be something connected with his trying to tell us something."
Batman: "Just what are you doing, and to whom are you doing it?"
Batman, analyzing a bullet in the wall: "Judging from the trajectory of the angle, and figuring the wind at six knots per hour north by northeast as per this morning's weather report...X times six squared... over... logarithm of that... yes! You see? It came from that room on that floor!"
Batman: "If my calculations are correct..." Robin: "They usually are." Batman: "...Someone should be coming through that window within the next six seconds."
Robin: "Batman, look! What skinny macaroni!" Batman: "No, it's spaghetti, Robin. A variety of alimentary paste, larger then bernachelli but not as tubular as macaroni." Robin: "Ghoti is fish?" Batman: "See here. English phonetics. GH becomes F, as in tough or laugh. O becomes I as in women. TI becomes SH as in ration or the word nation."
Batman: "To the alley!"
Batman: "To the spa!"
Batman: "I did a little extracurricular crime-detecting while Dick Grayson was doing his homework."
Robin: "Let's go!" Batman: "Not you, Robin. They have strict licensing laws in this country. A boy of your age is not allowed in a drinking tavern."
Robin: "You can't get away from Batman that easy!" Batman: "Easily." Robin: "Easily." Batman: "Good grammar is essential, Robin." Robin: "Thank you." Batman: "You're welcome."
Robin: "That's an impossible shot, Batman." Batman: "That's a negative attitude, Robin."
Batman: "That's one trouble with dual identities, Robin. Dual responsibilities."
Batman: "In fact, Mr. Wayne is taking Mrs. Harriet Cooper, a devotee of Miss Glaze's, backstage before the performance to meet the dazzling star." Robin: "While Dick Grayson, I suppose, stays home and works on his essay on glaciers?" Batman: "Right again, Robin."
Robin: "Where'd you get a live fish, Batman?" Batman: "The true crimefighter always carries everything he needs in his utility belt, Robin."
Batman: "Man-eating lilacs have no teeth, Robin. It's a process of ingestion through their tentacles."
Bruce: "Just because we're traveling, I don't think that Dick should neglect his studies, so we brought along one thousand key works of literature, his biological specimens, and also his own desk." Dick: "Yes, I expect to study hard."
Robin: "If we close our eyes, we can't see anything." Batman: "A sound observation, Robin."
Batman: "What took you so long, Batgirl?" Batgirl: "Rush hour traffic, plus all the lights were against me. And you wouldn't want me to speed, would you?" Robin: "Your good driving habits almost cost us our lives!" Batman: "Rules are rules, Robin. But you do have a point."