Chapter Six
THE Marines quickly dashed to the window. One by one, they descended the ladder, which kept weaving back and forth like snakes when they were under the spell of a snake charmer.
As Gomer was descending, the ladder finally cracked. "Look out, Sergeant!" he yelled.
Instantly Gomer crashed down on Carter. Boyle watched in astonishment.
Boyle and Gomer helped Carter up. Carter glared at Gomer. "Pyle, does everything always have to end in disaster with you? You could have broke your neck!"
"I know Sergeant, and I would've too, if it hadn't been for you," Gomer replied. "I sure hope I didn't hurt you."
Boyle remembered a time in the past when the very same thing had happened.
Carter glanced around, worried now. "I just hope we didn't attract attention. If we were caught coming out of the professor's window, we might be arrested because someone would think we'd stolen something or even hurt the professor!"
"Mercy!" Gomer cried. "Would someone actually think that? We're tryin' to help the professor!"
"Of course we are, Pyle, but the police wouldn't believe us. Especially when they questioned Professor Merriweather and he said that he hadn't asked us to help out."
"Well, Vince, I don't think you have to worry," Boyle assured Carter. "I don't see anyone around."
Just then they heard someone walking around up in the office.
"Golly, Sergeant, do you think whoever's up there heard us talkin'?" Gomer asked.
"They'd better not have!" Carter retorted. "All of what we said is confidential. Nobody should hear it!"
"Boy, it sure has been some day, hasn't it, Sergeant?" Gomer commented. "Flying saucers, ominous phone calls, government documents being stolen, the duty hut being ransacked, a piece of un-earthly metal . . ."
"Hey! Government documents were stolen!" Carter burst out.
"We know that, Vince," Boyle responded, unsure of what Carter was thinking this time.
"Well, among those documents were missile plans, right?" Carter said triumphantly.
"They sure were," Gomer said. "Terrible, terrible, terrible!"
"Well, don't you guys get it?" Carter persisted. "Missile plans!"
Suddenly realization dawned on Carter's friends and they looked at each other, then at Carter, in shock.
"You mean the ‘plans' in the phone call could've been the missile plans?" Boyle queried.
Carter nodded.
"But surely you don't think that Professor Merriweather stole the plans!" Gomer said, horrified. "He'd never do a thing like that!"
"Who knows, Pyle?" Carter replied airily. "Criminals usually turn out to be the ones you'd least suspect."
"But not Professor Merriweather!" Gomer insisted. "Not him!"
Boyle was equally appalled. "Really, Vince! I don't think that the crook would be him. Maybe the ‘plans' mentioned aren't even the missile plans!"
"Put two and two together, Boyle," Carter replied. "The plans are gone, and then someone calls on the telephone talking about bringing the plans! It all fits!"
"Golly, Sergeant, I don't think we should jump around to conclusions like that," Gomer protested. "Maybe the ‘plans' the caller referred to were plans for the development of a new kind of metal."
"I didn't know Professor Merriweather invented metals, Pyle," Boyle said. "I thought he just studied them."
"Hey! I've got it!" Carter exclaimed. "Professor Merriweather stole plans for a new kind of metal!"
"Why, Sergeant Carter!" Gomer reprimanded.
"Well, what else? It's either that or the missile plans!" Carter answered.
"There's that door we couldn't get into," Boyle mused. "The inner office where the professor analyzed our metal."
"We'll have to go back there soon with an official lock-picking kit," Carter decided. "We'll catch that crook!"
"I really don't think he is a crook, Vince," Boyle insisted. "Remember what the caller said? ‘Bring the plans or you'll never see her again!'"
"Yeah. So?" Carter demanded.
"So maybe someone kidnapped a friend or even a relative of the professor's and if the professor doesn't bring the plans, well . . ." Boyle let the others think about the rest.
"Hey! That's true!" Gomer exclaimed. "So if he did steal the plans—which I'm sure he didn't—it was probably to get his friend back!"
Carter parked the Jeep in Company B's parking lot. "Well, it's a lead," he said, not especially wanting to think about it. "But it's late. It's nearly midnight. So we'll talk about the whole thing in the morning."
"Someone definitely seems to be trying to do something drastic," Colonel Gray told Carter, Gomer, Boyle, and Hacker later that day. "Perhaps they're trying to warn you not to investigate." He paced the floor. "But we must find those government documents! They are very important for the future of our country."
"Yes, sir. We understand, sir," Carter said, speaking for everyone there.
"Golly, sir, there's no tellin' what the spies could do when they have those papers!" Gomer exclaimed.
"Maybe we'll have to go undercover, sir," Carter suggested.
"Yes, that is a possibility, isn't it?" the Colonel mused. "Whatever you do, you must be very careful!" he warned. "These spies will stop at nothing to keep you away!"
"Flying saucer! There's no such thing!" Hacker said.
"Golly, Sergeant Hacker, we don't know that for sure." Gomer held up the pamphlet they'd found last night at the professor's office. "This little booklet talks all about the famous UFO sightings, including the one at Roswell, New Mexico."
Hacker waved a hand dismissively. "Oh, that's all nonsense! It was some kind of government test and those so-called aliens were crash dummies, like the government admitted several years later."
"I don't know about that, Sergeant Hacker," Gomer said doubtfully. "It might have just been a story because the government didn't want to cause a national panic. That was nice of them," he reflected. "I know some people who would go into hysterics at the thought of aliens roaming the earth."
"Oh, for heaven's sake, Pyle!" Carter exclaimed, exasperated. "Hacker's right. It was just a government test."
"Or maybe a floating espionage device," Hacker added. "But it wasn't really from outer space, Pyle. There's no such thing as life on other planets."
"We don't know that, Sergeant." Gomer refused to let his mind be changed. "I really saw a flying saucer. I really did."
Hacker abruptly changed the subject. "What about all these crazy incidents today? Why would anyone steal a bag of flour?"
"Maybe they're just trying to make you blow your top," Carter suggested.
"Well, that's crazy!"
"Maybe it wasn't just a practical joke."
Everyone turned to look at Boyle. He had been silent all this time, listening to the conversation. Usually, when Boyle kept silent all through a conversation and then said something, he had something very interesting to say.
"Maybe someone actually hid something in the flour for safe-keeping and now they stole the flour to get it back."
Carter looked unconvinced. "That's crazy too! Who would hide something in a bag of flour for safe-keeping? And how could they?"
"Well, if it was one of those cloth bags, they could cut it open and then sew it back up," Boyle replied.
"Actually," Hacker said, "it was a cloth bag."
"Shazam! You mean we've got smugglers here?"
"Could be."
"This is getting ridiculous!" Carter threw up his hands in disgust. "There's all these mysteries that probably somehow connect, only we can't figure out how!" He began naming them. "There's the government documents. There's the flying saucers—or whatever they are—with their odd metals. There's the professor's ominous phone calls. There's these intruders at the Lodge mansion. There's . . ."
"It was probably just ordinary intruders, Carter," Hacker interrupted. "Surely ordinary intruders don't have any connections with these other cases. In fact, how would the UFOs connect? You're probably standing in the middle of three or four separate and distinct mysteries."
"But why would ordinary intruders be doing the odd things that these did?" Carter protested.
"I didn't know there was anything odd about it," Hacker replied. "They seemed to behave just like regular intruders, from what I've heard. If you were at any house and there were intruders, wouldn't they knock you out if you were getting close to discovering them?"
"Sure. But why, of all the times, when you're just going through a drawer looking for a flashlight?"
"It's simple, Carter. They'd hit you so you wouldn't find them with the flashlight."
Gomer and Boyle looked at each other.
"What about when you're out in the yard looking for your friends and the kids?" Boyle spoke up. "Why then?"
"Intruders are eccentric," Hacker replied.
"And why didn't they steal anything?" Carter demanded. "They had plenty of time to get stuff, so why didn't they?"
Just then a large rock soared from around a corner at them. It landed with a loud thump.
Hacker and Carter took off in the direction where it had come from, while Gomer and Boyle examined it.
"There's a note attached," Boyle realized, prying the rubber band off.
"Mercy! What does it say?" Gomer asked.
"‘Just forget about everything—the intruders at the Lodges', the government documents, the flying saucer, the professor's calls—everything! If you don't, you won't be as lucky next time,'" Boyle read.
"Why, that's terrible!" Gomer said indignantly. "Who'd write a note like that?"
"A real crook," Boyle replied, using caution when picking up the rock. "We can take this thing over to the police station and have them dust it for fingerprints."
After they stored the rock at the duty hut, they began to grow uneasy. Hacker and Carter certainly were taking a long time chasing that rock-thrower. Neither Gomer or Boyle had seen them as they were taking the rock out of the building where the Colonel's office was.
"Maybe we'd better go look for them," Boyle said finally, after another five minutes.
"We'd sure better!" Gomer agreed. "There's been so many odd things happening on the base today, who knows what'll happen next!"
And so Gomer and Boyle set out to look for the two sergeants.
"Where are they?" Gomer cried.
"They've got to be somewhere," Boyle said, trying to be optimistic.
When they arrived back at Company B's duty hut, to their relief, Carter and Hacker were there.
"Sergeant Carter! Sergeant Hacker! Where in the world did you two go?" Gomer exclaimed.
"Just chasing the rock-thrower, Pyle," Carter replied simply.
"We were really getting worried," Boyle said. "We looked all over the base for you and couldn't find you."
"Oh, he ran up the stairs all the way up to the roof," Hacker began. "Carter and I thought he was going to do some fool thing and followed. When we got up there, he jumped us. We managed to wrestle away from him and I went to find the MPs. We got him carted away to jail. He won't confess to anything, not even jumping us, even though we definitely know he did that if nothing else."
"Mercy!" Gomer said. "No wonder we couldn't find you—up on the roof! We never would have thought to look up there, would we, Corporal?"
"I should say not," Boyle responded. "You guys are lucky you didn't fall off!"
"Just one more odd incident we can add to our list," Carter remarked cynically.
"I've gotta go," Hacker said suddenly, rushing to the door. "I left one of the worst cooks on the base on duty back at the mess hall." He quickly departed, leaving the other three to ponder over the mystery.
"It's all so weird!" Carter burst out.
"That rock that guy threw at us had a message attached," Gomer spoke up. "Show him, Corporal."
Boyle held out the note and Carter read it. "‘Just forget about everything—the intruders at the Lodges', the government documents, the flying saucer, the professor's calls—everything! If you don't, you won't be as lucky next time.'" The sergeant looked up. "‘Next time'? What ‘next time'?"
"Maybe the next time he throws a rock," Boyle suggested. "Or maybe just next time something ominous happens."
"Terrible, terrible, terrible!" Gomer commented sadly.
"Well, we'll sure have to watch it wherever we go," Carter realized. "Who knows what could happen to us?"
"That's a creepy thought," Boyle remarked.
"Maybe we ought to call the professor," Gomer suggested. "If he's in trouble, he might tell us."
"That's a good idea," Boyle agreed.
Carter got out the phone book. "University . . . Professors . . . Maxwell . . . Merman . . . Ah! Here we go—Merriweather." He picked up the phone and dialed the number. In a minute, the secretary answered. She sounded strangely brusque.
"Hello, Professor Merriweather's office," she said curtly.
"Hi there," Carter said. "Could you connect me with the professor's office?"
"I'm sorry," replied the secretary. "That would be impossible."
"Why?" Carter asked. "If he's not available, I'll call back later."
"I should say he's not available!" burst out the secretary. "He's vanished!"
