daddy's little girl

I see the light under the door and so

I go in to see him

I want to put my hand on his tired shoulder

Smell his after-shave, sense his love and weariness

But I know if I did, he wouldn't turn to me in love

He wouldn't smile and hug me.. show affection for his only daughter

No.

Instead he would just glance back, then turn to glare

Get out Get out Away Away from me

With that little seed of hatred,of rage and resentment that's been in

His eyes - his soul - for as long as I can remember

Then the words, the anger rush to stab me like slivers of

Ice and I cringe and hurt inside, that he can't speak of

Good and right things, that he must speak only of

What is wrong and hurtful and shaming

And the years fall away to leave me defenseless and terrified

My only escape is when he is too disgusted to keep hurting me

He turns his back

Not now not now not ever not mine not Mine

And those years are mine again

And the little girl is hid and the woman stands there

Crying and angry, unable to understand this thing

That should have been

Her father.

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