Tile: How Could He Not See?
Author: Erin
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I don't own them, never did.
Distribution: The Archive. Force Haven. Anyone else, just ask.
Warnings: Only if you've no knowledge of Star Wars movie-verse
at all.
Pairings: Obi/Ani. Padme/Ani.
Summary: Padme's thoughts as she thinks about Obi-Wan and Anakin.
Author's Note: I think it's rather incoherent and not quite
in her voice. But by the third movie she seemed to have lost that, so
what the hey. Slightly echoes the first Anakin drabble, "My
Everything". Uhm, goes along with the other drabbles I've
written. I'm sure you're thinking, we know.
"You love him, don't you?"
With those words, all the little niggling questions that had plagued my mind had solidified into one thought. Obi-Wan loved Anakin just as much as Anakin loved him, if not more so. And only Obi-Wan had the power to save him from this fall the Master Jedi saw coming.
Why, oh why couldn't that foolish man see it for himself when it was all to clear? Why did he think that it was me who could save Anakin just because I was his wife? Why, when it was so obviously him who held Ani's saving grace within his hands and his heart?
This quietly passionate man, with his humble dignity is the only one with the strength to hold Anakin together.
I saw it, why couldn't he? Why couldn't the Jedi Council see what they had done to them by sending him away, alone? Separating them-especially at this time-was so wrong, they needed to be together.
Anakin saw himself as being incredibly blessed to have Obi-Wan at his side. He's so pleased with the Skywaker/Kenobi team that he cannot contemplate a time when it won't be there. Their pairing is oxygen to him, it is his life's blood.
I saw how with a few words Obi-Wan could cool that passionate temper of his.
Though he railed against the way Obi-Wan treated him, he would not want him anywhere else. He would not want to be anywhere else but there, at his side. Obi-Wan is more than a father or a brother to him, more than a friend and mentor.
Anakin thought I never saw it, never felt it. But I was only all too aware of this phantom rival. The phantom rival I could never win against.
Obi-Wan Kenobi is what I never could be, his true soul mate.
And oh, how that thought stings and pricks my heart, causing it to bleed unceasingly. I, who have lied and betrayed my own conscience, do not rate so high. Hard as it is to accept, I am not his perfect love as he swears.
If I was, he would leave the Jedi Order no matter what I say to him. When fully determined, not even the Force's will can stop him from following his own whims. Yet, he listens to me and stays with them.
He stays for one reason, one alone, Obi-Wan Kenobi.
I should hate the man. Really I should for he has all that I have broken my principles for and does not see it. I knew that we would be the destruction of each other.
I just never imagined that it would be like this. To me, to be Anakin Skywalker's wife is to be alive. To him, I am only his perfect, pristine, angelic love.
And his prized, secret possession.
I once was a Queen who ruled my country. Who, in a time of great peril, made a decision to invade and free it from our enemies. I made that choice when no one would help us.
Not even our own Senator Palpatine did. For all his fine words and high moral stance, he did nothing. Yet, I admire him for the courage of conviction he shows.
Though I fear the taint he has now acquired.
The power Chancellor Palpatine possess has possessed him. I fear that it will possess my Ani as well. Possess him and take him farther from me than I have the will to follow.
Farther than even Obi-Wan has the strength to save him. I know that if Ani does fall, I will die at his hand. I know and I will walk willingly into it, hoping that he will yet be saved.
Be saved by the one who couldn't admit the depths of his love for Ani to me, yet his actions clearly reveal it.
End.