Title: Facts (of the mind, the soul, the body and the heart)
Author: Monchy
Rating: G
Category: slash, romance
Disclaimer: not mine
Summary: "Anakin is not very sure of why he does what he does (...)
Obi-wan onlyu does something when he is very sure about it."
Anakin is not very sure of why he does what he does. He doesn't know why he spends hours training when everybody keeps repeating him that he is the best fighter the order has, or why he can't spend more than five minutes meditating. He doesn't know why he goes to clubs looking for casual sex either, and he isn't capable of understanding why he married Padme. He isn't very sure of why he hates Mace Windu or why Yoda scares him. A lot of times he wonders this things and when he can't find an answer he crosses the Temple in the darkness of the night, enters Obi-wan's room y cuddles next to him in bed, relaxing when he embraces him and presses him against himself. He doesn't know why he does that either, but Obi-wan makes no questions and embraces him and is warm and he feels protected between his arms.
Obi-wan only does something when he is very sure about it. That is why he trains extra hours with Anakin and why he meditates a predetermined time every day. He likes to keep his control, so he has learned to avoid lust and desire and that is why he never accompanies anybody to a club, he doesn't like playing with his defenses. He knows this reasons have earned him the trust of the Council, although Yoda looks at him as if he knew he had done something wrong. He wonders if he finds his relationship with Anakin weird, but when he comes in the middle of the night he can't help embracing him. Is the only thing he does without full understanding, but Anakin feels good against his chest and needs him and doesn't bore him with useless explanations and is warm.
Anakin has always been more emotional than recommendable in a jedi. He puts his heart before his mind and that hasn't cost him just his arm, but many incidents during his short life. But he loves his mother and won't stop doing it; he feels some kind of fondness for Padme and will keep feeling it. Death and confusion haven't stopped his heart from beating for those he loves, so he can assure – with pride and joy – that the Council won't do it either. He doesn't know how to define what he feels when he runs to hide in Obi- wan's arms, but he knows he doesn't want to loose it..
Obi-wan has never been a visceral person. Before doing anything he meditates it over and over again, looking for the best way to take the right steps. That was why the void that appeared inside him when Qui-gon died was so strange to him, and he surprised himself when he started crying like a kid. The Code hadn't prepared him for such an intense emotion, or to his feelings towards Anakin. The truth is he doesn't know what it is, just that it makes his heartbeat strong and that he doesn't want to loose it..
Anakin's favorite body part are hands. They are a very sensitive part of the body and, placed in the right spots, capable of producing electricity. That is why he covers his metallic hand with a glove, because is not natural. Obi-wan has beautiful hands and Anakin knows it because he can't stop staring at them. They are big with long and elegant fingers but very masculine, a bit calloused from the years of holding a saber. Some nights he dares taking them between his own and entwining their fingers, trembling because Obi-wan doesn't reject the metallic touch of his artificial hand. Then he usually wonders how those hands would feel caressing his body. It scares him to know that it would be like being in heaven.
Obi-wan has to admit that his fetish are necks. It is the most appropriate part of the body to lick, kiss, bite and mark, and it is the one that produces the most pleasurable sensations in a subtle way. Anakin has a neck that is made to caress, and Obi-wan knows it because he is obsessed with his Adam's apple. It is a strong and long neck but not exaggerated, it has a natural elegance and a sensual perfection. When Anakin is between his arms he drives those thoughts away, although he embraces him harder unconsciously. Sometimes he wonders what would happen if he descended his lips to the soft skin and if he would feel his pulse quicken underneath his mouth. He frightens at the thought that it would be like kissing heaven.
Anakin decides one day that he doesn't like living in doubt, so he opens his eyes and looks at Obi-wan. His eyes are opened and his lips parted and is sensual and perfect. He leans a little and kisses him. He leaves his lips above the other one's making a silent question and tries to calm the trembling that is going trough his body. When Obi-wan starts returning the kiss and hugs him tighter he understands that he trains so he doesn't have to think and that he doesn't meditate for the same reason, that he looks for cheap sex and married Padme to substitute the contact he didn't have and that he hates Mace and is scared of Yoda because they know about his real desires. But that doesn't matter any more because his lips are still pressed to Obi-wan's and he is warm and he loves him.
Obi-wan likes to look at Anakin while he is sleeping, that is why he is surprised when one day he opens his eyes and stares at him. He looks frightened and he is opening his lips and is beautiful and perfect. When he closes the distance between them and kisses him, he is grateful that he waits for an answer. Obi-wan knows what the shivers he is feeling mean, so he returns the kiss and presses him tight against his chest and he starts understanding that he fights and meditate to drive certain kind of thoughts away, that he avoids sex because there is only one person who he wants to loose control with and that Yoda knows it even if the Council trust so much in him. But Anakin is kissing him and everything else looses importance because he is warm and he loves him.
FIN