Site hosted by Build your free website today!


THE ABC's of Grieving,
 ...Anniversaries, Birthdays, Cycle events...

Harlan's 26th birthday was six months after his accident. This year was spent just, kinda, moping around since it was too soon afterwards and I guess we were still in shock. The thing that hurt most that day was the ‘birthday gift' that the county brought to our home for Harlan. Randy was home and answered the door this time. The person at the door had an arrest warrant for Harlan. Here it is, Harlan's birthday, he's been gone since June 9th, and the county doesn't even know it? Talk about adding salt to a new wound!

New Years weekend Randy, Mardi, Mark (Mardi's significant other), Daryl, and I all stayed at a Bed-N-Breakfast I located on the Internet. None of us wanted to spend the weekend at home and this seemed like the best thing for us to do. Since Daryl was underage and wasn't permitted into any of the bars, we went out for a bite to eat then purchased some fireworks to shoot off. The B-N-B had a pond in the front yard so I sat on the bench drinking their complimentary non-alcoholic champagne while Mardi and the guys shot off their fireworks. It was nice but it would have been nicer if Harlan was there as well.

Now, comes May 29th, one and one-half weeks before Harlan's ‘first anniversary' . . . The day was spent with me feeling something is wrong and not knowing what. Yes, it was nearing the one year mark, but that wasn't it. Late that evening the phone rang and we found out why I was having the feeling something was wrong. My sister who came to Harlan's funeral, Penny, had died! More about this when you get to ‘The Energizer Bunny Stopped Ticking'.

June 9, 1999 was one year since Harlan's accident. We debated about how to spend it. Another Bed-N-Breakfast? No, we'd spend too much time remembering what happened one year ago. What would Harlan want us to do today? He'd want us to go out and have fun. Do something he, himself, would be doing today. We decided to spend the day at Hurricane Harbor Water Park. Harlan always had a good time there. While I ‘moseyed in the Lazy River', Mardi and the guys hit the rides that Harlan would have enjoyed. The day ended with all of us exhausted, starving, and sunburnt. Just like Harlan would have been!

Harlan's memorial service was on June 12th and Randy had to be out of town for business that day. There was no way I was going to stay home on that day so Mardi, Mark, Daryl, and I went to Granny Lou's B-N-B in Bonham. This is the first B-N-B we ever stayed at. Back in August Randy decided that he, Daryl, and I needed to get away before school started again. Fortunately, I found this B-N-B while ‘surfing the net'. Since the three of us enjoyed it so much, I knew it would be the perfect place for the four of us. Thank G-d, it did the trick!