What is the most watched entity at a football game? Not the barelegged mopheaded cheerleader porn models jumping up and down attracting attention to their indecent partial immodesty for lurid titillation violating such RSV Scripture as Numbers 5:18, Song of Solomon 7:5, I Corinthians 11:14-16 concerning the improper hairstyle.....and Isaiah 47:1-4 for the naked leggedness. No.

Not the "foot"-ball players nor referrees, which "foot"-ball moosers pass and carry the pigskin as much as they kick it.

You're right: it's the "foot" ball most eyes in the stadium and in TV land are more or less always on. But why call the game "foot"-ball?

Most eyes are on the "basket"-ball in "basket"-ball games. Most eyes are on the "base"-ball in "base"-ball games. Are the baskets and bases more important than the balls in basketball and baseball? And what could we call "foot"-ball games then instead? Goalpost ball?

There are no such games as "tennis"-ball, "bowling"-ball, "soccer"-ball, nor even "hockey puc." There is, instead: tennis, bowling, soccer, and hockey......even though, again, most eyes are almost constantly on the tennis BALL, bowling BALL, soccer BALL, and hockey PUC.

Since the sodomites have pseudo-succeeded in redefining the word gay from something innocently-carefree and yippie-skippie childlike to something sickening, lewdly disgusting and obnoxiously perverted, this webpage author will attempt to redefine the word fuck [in this particular webpage] to mean something maritally-legitimate, tenderly-performed, privately personal, intimately erotic, and phenomenally ecstatic.

Now, before anyone works themself up into an enraged prejudicial-turnoff tizzy, may I remind the reader that Webster's New Collegiate Dictionary informs us that the word fuck has Scandinavian origin from the Norwegian fukka and the Swedish focka - both meaning: to copulate. The dictionary goes on to add that the four-lettered word usually has an "obscene" meaning. I repeat: USUALLY. [As the man said: "What part of USUALLY don't you understand?"]

For those of you who continue having trouble baring with me for a while, let me euphemize it into palpable pablum as: "Another 'BALL' game."

Let's be honest. There simply is not enough real-life, in-fact, bonafide fucking going on. Lots of people swear at it and with it. In fact, hearing the pejorative, blue-air, f-word mantra of some one-track-mind bozos, you'd think that fucking was the most important thing they ever thought of and would like to do. But it's mostly talk and no do. By far. And if they do do it occasionally, it to them is shameful, harsh and quick, guilt-ridden, and disappointingly short-lived. In it's place is porn-agitated wasting of prostate and uterus with impotence-causing cancer-inviting self-sodomy frequently called "masturbation." So tonight when you and I go to bed (but not together, necessarily) let's try to imagine how many couples are ACTUALLY doing it and if mutually "birthday-suit" nude as they are fervently, passionately, urgently, and/or obediently doing it.