A/N: Calisto MT is Merry, Comic Sans MS is Pippin

Day One:
We’re bored. Stupid island.
It’s not an island, you idiot.
Oh, shove it up your Horn of Gondor.
That would hurt. Hey, look! Fishsticks! I love these things!
What? Where?

Later
We’re not going to last long here. Too boring.
Ha! You’re not going to last long. I’m going to win!
Yeah, right. Let’s go see what Frodo and Sam are doing.

Later than the other later
Sam prefers to sit awfully close to Frodo. I never noticed that before.
Frodo had a funny look on his face…well, I would too if Sam were that close to me.

Day Two:
Lalala.
Lalalalalalalalalalalala.
LALALALALALALALALA!
Hey, let’s stay up all night!
Okay!
We can steal Gollum’s fishsticks!
And Gandalf’s pipeweed!
And Gimli’s helmet!
And the peach-scented soap!
And Arwen’s nail polish!
And Galadriel’s lip gloss!
And Elrond’s dress!
And—huh?
Um…

Later
Legolas is gone.
Stupid prat. Split end, my ass.
What? A split in your ass? What does that have to do with anything?
…Never mind…

Still Later
Hey, Pippin, who am I? "MY PRECIOUSSSSSSSSSSSSS…"
Oh, that’s easy! Aragorn, right? No—wait—Boromir. Galadriel is what I really meant to say.
Okay, okay, another hint. "MY PRECIOUS FIIIIIISHSTIIIIIICK…"
Ohhhhhhh, okay, I get it now! I know, I know, Gandalf!
Oh, god. Let’s play a different game now…
It was Arwen all along, wasn’t it? I knew it!

Day Three:
It’s the third day.
Still bored.
What should we do?
Race you around the hut 46,708,911 times!
Okay! Ready, set, go!

Later
Am out of breath now.
I won!
No you didn’t. You cheated.
Did not!
Did too!
Did not! You cheated! You only went around 46,708,910 times!
You’re the cheater.
You are.
You, you, you!
You, you, you!

Even Later
What does Pippin stand for, anyway?
Nothing! I’m Pippin from the Chicago Bulls! Haha!
Yeah, right, and I’m Merry Poppins.
But it’s Mary Poppins.
Oh, shove it up your—ow!
Hahaha.

Day Four:
Hahahahahaha…before he left, Legolas used Arwen’s brush. Apparently, he really does shed. She found one blonde hair in it.
Getting scared. Gimli is wanting to braid our hair. Told us so while he was trying to join today’s race around Aragorn in the field.
Said he had vegetables…that was the hardest part to resist. But we kept running.
Still bored.

Later
Running out of things to do.
Played hide-and-go-seek. Forgot who was hiding and who was seeking.
Stole another fishstick.
Yeah, that was fun.
Pippin, I’m bored.
Me too.

Even Later than Later was when Later was Now
I’m tired.
Yeah.
And bored.
Yeah.
What do you think, Pippin?
Yeah.
What?
What?
What?
WHAT?
Oh, nevermind…

Day Five:
Aragorn is weeeeeeird.
Uh-huh. He’s been sitting in that wet field forever.
Bet his butt is numb. He’ll probably catch a cold. D’you think we should bring him his cloak?
Pippin?
Yeah, Merry?
Shut up.

Later
99 bowls of pipeweed on the wall, 99 bowls of pipeweeeeeeeeed…
Light one up, pass it around, and everyone gets all happy………weed………
That doesn’t rhyme!
Sure it does, you just don’t know it yet.
Huh?

Later, later, later
Eyes…burning…just saw Elrond in Arwen’s dress.
I thought the color complimented his eyes.
Pippin?
What?
Shut up again.

Hahahahaha…guess what!
Yeah?
Tomorrow’s gonna be awesome! Found Aragorn’s journal. He’s still out in the field. He says there’s a secret stash of carrots in the second room!
No way! This rocks!
Yep…I can see it now…

Day Six:
Haha! I stole Gollum’s fishsticks!
And I tangled Arwen’s and Galadriel’s hair together while they were taking their “beauty naps.” They’re gonna be soooooo mad…
Also tripped Gimli this morning.
This is funner than anything else!
Hey Pippin! Look at this!
At what?
Pipeweeeeeeed…
Ohhhhhhh…

Later
Aw, come on Sam, it was just a bit of fun!
Yeah, really, it was nothing personal!
I didn’t mean to touch you!
Ew! You touched him?
So did you!
No I didn’t! I wouldn’t ever touch him!
Oh no!
I can’t believe you touched him…ew…

Even Later
Pothead wars! Yeah!
Merry, again! Ready, set, go!

Day Seven:
Merry!
What now, Pippin?
I have the carrots!
SWEET!
Carrot confetti! Yeah!
Oh no!
What?
The carrots just fell off the cliff!
Oh…race you to them!
Okay, this place sucks anyways!
WOOHOO! I can run faster than you!
No you can’t! Haha! Down and down and down we go, where we land—OUCH—I know…