Invading the Fellowship

Part Two

 

"So…" said Katie. "We've been kicked out of Rivendell! Go us!!"

            "It's all his fault!" Sami pointed at Gimli, simply because the Dwarf of the party hadn't been mentioned yet.

            "Argh! Ich! Ech! Auch. Ach. Argh again. What did I do?" Gimli the extremely ugly little dwarf grunted.

            "I dunno," Sami replied. "Just felt that someone needed to mention your name."

            "Argh."

            "He needs a wider vocabulary," Renee whispered.

            "Yeah," Megan agreed. "Sounds like Gollum with his limited vocab."

            "Hey now," Katie said, "Gollum is actually a very intelligent…thing…"

            "Suuuuuuuure…" Megan commented sarcastically.

            It was at that moment the four girls realized the rest of the Fellowship was staring at them rather oddly…again.

            "What are you looking at?" Katie asked. Sam looked at her, and she ran to hide behind Haldir.

            "Hey!" Sami exclaimed. "Where'd you come from?"

            "Came to protect Miss Katie from the Evil Hobbit." He glared menacingly at Sam, and Sam ran to attach himself to Frodo. Frodo looked disturbed by this.

            "Anyways," Megan began. "Where exactly are we going again?"

            "We're off to destroy the Ring…" Renee sang.

            "The evil, bad Ring of Sauron…" Sami chimed in. The two of them skipped around in circles.

            "Hey!" Megan shouted suddenly, making Sami and Renee trip over each other. Megan looked around. "Where'd the rest of the Fellowship go?"

            "Um…there they are!" Katie exclaimed. They ran down the road to catch up with the rest of them.

            "Phew," Renee said. "You guys almost left us behind!"

            "Damn," said Boromir.

            "What was that?" Megan asked sharply.

            "Oh, nothing!" He smiled angelically.

            "Ew! Don't do that!" Sami cried.

            "Do what?" Pippin asked.

            "Smile!" she answered, shrieking. "Ew, ew! Don't you have any Altoids? Or Crest® Whitening toothpaste?"

            "What?" Merry, not to mention the rest of the Fellowship, was obviously confused.

            "Never mind."

            "Here, I have gum!" Katie pulled out a huge bag.

            "You always have gum." Megan rolled her eyes. "Your locker's full of it!"

            "Here," Katie tossed a piece a Boromir, who amused himself with the wrapper. Katie felt a tap on her shoulder. She looked up to see Legolas. "XD…hi…"

            "Do you have any Dentyne Ice?" he asked, blinking.

            "I have Orbit!" Sami piped up, tossing a piece to Legolas.

"That's not fair!" Renee pouted at Katie. "How come he asked you for gum and not me?"

"Well, she has the bag," Aragorn pointed out the obvious. He took it and distributed the gum throughout the Fellowship. "Now you all have an endless supply of gum."

"And I still have all of mine!" Katie looked into the bag. "Must be one of those food-multiplying Jesus tricks.

"Another what?" Pippin asked.

"…XD…never mind." Katie shoved the bag back into her backpack. "Hey…where'd all my pudding go?"

"I didn't take it. Hey, what's that?" Sami pointed to a bunch of rocks in the distance.

"It's the ruins of stuff," Gandalf replied, heading to the front of the pack. "We'll camp there for the night." He dragged the group towards the rocks.

"Ahh!" Renee fell down after tripping on a rock. "My ankle! I think I sprained it!"

"Faker." Sami mumbled.

"Let me see it," Legolas said, bending down next to her.

"XD…I'd take a picture, but someone stole my camera," Katie said, while eating Chex Mix.

"I have one!" Megan snapped a picture. "Gee, Sami looks mad." She pointed over to her, and Katie noticed she had turned red and there was steam coming out of her ears.

"Argh, I'm mad too!" Gimli grumbled. "Don't have any beer."

"That, or you're constipated," Pippin said.

"Argh!" Gimli said again, then waddled over to a rock and sat down.

"With your ankle that badly sprained, you can't walk." Legolas picked up Renee. "I shall carry you the rest of the way there."

"Here," Katie said to Sami, handing her a baseball bat. "Sam's over there. Go vent your anger…blow off some steam." Grumbling, Sami took the bat and dragged Sam behind a rock. The rest of the Fellowship winced as they heard very painful screams.

"The enemy could be close behind!" Frodo blurted out. "Let's hurry up and get to the rocks!"

"K. Sami! C'mon!" Megan called. Sami reappeared, dragging a bruised and unconscious Samwise behind her, and followed them up the hill to the rocks.

"Grrrrrr…" Sami griped as she watched Legolas mend Renee's foot.

"Hey…where's Katie?" Megan asked. "Found her pudding. Merry had it."
            "I was hungry!" Merry insisted. "She dragged Frodo off to go hunting for mushrooms anyway."

"What about Sam?"

"He's over there." Merry pointed to the fat hobbit chained to a log. "Haldir's chained him up after following them into the woods."

"Keep off of it for a few days and you'll be fine." Legolas finished wrapping Renee's ankle.

"Argh! Fancy elf…stupid…" Gimli complained.

"Uh…yeah…" Megan nodded. "Whatever you say. Hey, what's for dinner?"

"Crisp bacon and potatoes." Pippin poked the potatoes in the fire.

"Oooooh…yummy." Megan grinned. "But I have an urge for fishsticks.

"Me too!" Renee and Sami said in unison.

"I think there's a box in my backpack." Katie walked up, carrying a basket of mushrooms.

"Here, let's cook them." Pippin quickly grabbed the mushrooms and started cooking them.

"Okay, okay!" Katie blinked. "Chill."

"Mushroom good in the stomach taste." Gandalf said, then fell over.

Katie, Sami, Renee, and Megan all looked at each other, then said simultaneously, "Pipeweed."

"Dinner's ready!" Pippin announced. "Careful with the potatoes they're hot!"

"All right. Perfect." Sami picked up a potato and flung it at Sam's head.

"Ahh!" Sam cried, ducking as the potato narrowly missed his head. "You almost hit me!"

"Yeah I know…I've got bad aim…" she faked sympathy.

"Here…" Legolas handed Renee a cooled potato. "It's not much, but you need your strength. Eat up!"

"I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" Sami kicked Gimli clear across the camp.

"What did he do?" Megan asked, dropping a hot potato down the back of Sam's shirt.

"Breathed." With that, Sami stormed off to her bed.

 

"Woohoo! Nice kick, Sami! You should have gone out for soccer!" Renee yelled after her.

There was the sound of yelling in the distance.

"Er, okay," said Aragorn. "I must go, I will search the area. I will be back."

"Er, okay," Katie mocked. Aragorn shot her an angry glance, then left. "Haha!" she laughed.

All of the sudden, they heard rocks crumbling. Someone was invading their camp! The four hobbits went into their little circle, backs against each other. Katie started digging stuff out of her backpack.

"Okay…have a surfboard, a baseball bat, another stick…why do I have that in there?"

Everyone else was starting to suspect that her backpack was not really a backpack, but instead a bottomless pit. Sam tried to steal a cookie she had pulled out. She motioned for Haldir, who proceeded to try to throw Sam off the side of the cliff. Then, a shadow moved in the distance.

"Ha! The wraiths! Sweet! I wanna picture!" Megan said, whipping her camera back out.

"Oh great, what fun this will be," Sami said as Legolas went to stand in front of Renee and guard her.

"Wait, wait, wait, I got it!" Katie said. "Haldir, you take the surfboard and hit the first one in the face. I'll take out the second one with the bat, Megan you take the stick, and Sami, you take the Sam and chuck him at the fourth one. Ready, now!

Everyone looked at her strangely.

"Hey, I'm not a light traveler!"

"Ah, okay," said Boromir.

"Yeah. Now on my mark, get set, NOW!!"

"I got one! Score!" Sami cheered as she sent Sam flying into the nearest wraith.

"We got four! Yes!" Katie cried.

"AH! AH!" Frodo screamed from the corner.

"What? What?" Katie cried frantically.

"Oh no!" Megan exclaimed. "He's been stabbed by the Nazgul!"

"Noooo!" Sam shouted, running over to Frodo.

"HEY! GET AWAY FROM MY HOBBIT!" Katie yelled.

Sam was about to retort, but then saw Haldir and backed off.

"Arrrrrrrrgh!" Aragorn yelled, charging into the clearing. "Where are the evil Nazgul?"

"Hey, bud, um, well, we already chased them away. I think you were a bit, you know, LATE!" Katie screamed.

"Oh, yes, well, sorry," Aragorn apologized.

"Hellooooo! The cute little hobbit just got stabbed over here!" Frodo said.

"Oh, yeah," Megan said. "Ahem. Frodo! No! Someone help him!!"

Aragorn raced over to him and started barking orders. "Sam, go get this flower-thing! Bring it back, now hurry!"

Sam looked at him evilly, but then walked away. "It's to save Mr. Frodo…" he mumbled.

"Okay, let's go, come on!" Katie yelled. "Hurry up, what're you waitin' for?"

"Well, for Sam to get back," Merry replied uncertainly.

"Uh, that's why we should be going!" Katie pushed them along. "Come on, come on! Pick up Frodo, Aragorn!

At that moment, Sam came running back. "Found it!"

"Dammit," Sami muttered. Sam shot her a glance, but she pointed at Katie who pointed at Haldir. Sam ran over to Aragorn and Frodo.

"Nice little security system," Renee commented.

"I want a bodyguard," Megan whined.

"I will protect you!" Gimli was now back again.

"But you're a ugly little dwarf with chunky braids and a big helmet."

"Argh! So?"

"Well…you're not exactly very impressive-looking."

"Yeah," Katie stuck her tongue out at Gimli. "You're not as cool as Haldir."

"I think Frodo's gonna die…" Renee pointed to Frodo, who was starting to turn green.

"No he won't," Sami said. "You read the books, didn't you?"

"Hey!" Arwen rode up on her horse. "Let me take him to Rivendell and fix him up."

"But…didn't we just come from Rivendell? Megan pointed out.

"…So?" Sami blinked. "Well just be in Rivendell again for a few days…"

"That would be good." Legolas nodded, picking up Renee. "Then you can get plenty of rest."

Katie handed Sami the bat again, and she dragged Sam behind a tree. Everyone tried to ignore Sam's voice up three octaves.

"I will take Frodo there! Bye!" Arwen pulled Frodo up on the horse and rode off laughing.

"Katie, she rode off with your hobbit!" Megan turned to Katie.

"I have back-up hobbits." She pointed to Pippin.

"Hey! You can't have Pippin! He's mine!" Renee glared at her.

"You have Legolas, so hush up." Katie snapped her fingers. Haldir picked her up and put her on his back, carrying her piggy-back style. "XD…this is the life."

"That's not fair!" Megan wailed. She looked over and saw Gimli. "Er…I'll be fine walking…"

"K, we're there," Sami announced.

"HUH?" The Fellowship looked up.

"^_^ we were only two minutes away from Rivendell!" Katie said, sliding off Haldir's back.

"That was a total waste of time," Renee said as Legolas carried her to some Elf-house.

"Where's Mr. Frodo?" Sam asked, looking around.

"He's resting," Elrond said, appearing. "You can see him in a bit."