Redneck Sayings

"Well knock me down and steal muh teeth!"

"Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit."

"I'll slap you so hard, your
clothes will be outta style."

"This'll jar your preserves."

"Cute as a sack full of puppies."

"Gooder than grits."

"It's so dry, the trees are bribing the dogs."

"It's been hotter'n a goat's butt in a pepper patch."

"Wintery roads are said to be "slicker than otter snot."

"A bothersome person is
"like a booger that you can't flick off."

If something is hard to do, it's "like trying to herd cats."

"A hectic schedule keeps you
"Busier than a cat covering doo-doo on a marble floor."

"Busier then a one legged man in a butt kickin contest."

"Your momma's so fat, when she got
on the scales to be weighed, it said 'To be continued'."

"He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down."

"Uglier than a lard bucket full of armpits."

"The wheels still turning, but the hamsters dead"