Girl In The Mirror  

The young girl fled into the dark and lonesome hotel room, tears hot and salty already pelting down her pale cheeks. Leaning against the closed door she slid to the floor, burying her head in her hands and unleashing all the pent up emotion she'd strived to conceal that day. The mask of happiness she'd projected had fooled many; it was true. But those closest to her had noticed the change and were worried about this 'pop princess' who was loved by so many.

The girl eventually struggled to her feet, face stained from tears and the occasional drop still finding its way from her somber eyes. She stumbled to her dresser and though half scared of what she'd find, glanced into the mirror. The young woman staring back at her looked wretched, usually perfect hair and makeup reduced to sorry memories. Her face was streaked with mascara and eyeliner, the latter smeared around the bridge of her nose and over her cheekbones as she'd wiped her eyes. And these same eyes were what drew the most attention. Looking into them, they told a story of a heart broken in two and stepped all over. Of a girl strong and cheerful, diminished to the dejected specimen reflected in the looking-glass.

There's a girl in my mirror
I wonder who she is
Sometimes I think I know her
Sometimes I really wish I did
There's a story in her eyes
Lullabies and goodbyes
When she's looking back at me
I can tell her heart is broken easily

Dropping to the floor once again, she leaned against the soft bed, laying her tired head upon it. Memories swept through her vision and all she could see was him. The one man who’d been there all the way. The one who was the reason she breathed, sang….the reason for her entire existence.

  He stood there in the light flooding from the from the open bathroom door, eyes downcast and hands nervously twitching at his sides. She watched as those beautiful blue eyes – such expressive eyes – rose to meet hers. She was shocked at the change she saw in his gaze. There was no longer any of the familiar love and tenderness shining forth. No warmth or caring. All she could sense in these eyes was a strange coldness; and underneath it a certain vulnerability.  His eyes made him a stranger.

'Cause the girl in my mirror
Is crying here tonight
And there's nothing I can tell her
To make her feel alright
Oh the girl in my mirror
Is crying 'cause of you
And I wish there was something
Something I could do

The cries started again, the pretty blonde burying her face within her impeccably manicured hands. She felt she’d never wept so much in her entire life – the tears slithered down her tanned skin, landing within her lap and dissolving into the material of her designer jeans.

Finally collapsing on to her orderly bed she whimpered and closed her eyes, willing the image of him to depart from her tired mind. But he remained, taunting her incessantly.

“I don’t think we should see each other anymore,” he whispered, the tone used distant and unfeeling. Hearing this heartless declaration, she let out a small cry, looking up into his eyes as if begging him to tell her it wasn’t true; that this was simply a cruel joke being played. But the reality shone plainly forth from those cold blue orbs, remote and cutting to her very core. That look; she felt afraid. So very afraid. And alone. As she continued to gaze into his stone face, he watched her and she was sure she saw a flicker of his old self. Or maybe that was merely her wishing…

If I could
I would tell her
Not to be afraid
The pain that she's feeling
The sense of loneliness will fade
So dry your tears and rest assured
Love will find you like before
When she's looking back at me
I know nothing really works that easily

She curled up on herself, moving into the fetal position and concealing her puffy eyes and makeup-streaked face in her hands. This was like nothing she’d had to deal with before. For the last couple of years, her life had been happy – carefree even. But ever since the night before when he’d pulled her world down around her, nothing rational seemed to make sense anymore. She was like a shell of her former self, coiled up on that bed in a random hotel room. He didn’t care anymore. Perhaps he never had. Lifting her head slightly, she glanced into the same mirror she’d looked into only moments before – now it seemed like years. She caught sight of herself. She realized that she gave the impression of a little girl, lost and frightened beyond belief.

'Cause the girl in my mirror
Is crying here tonight
And there's nothing I can tell her
Oh the girl in my mirror
Is crying 'cause of you
And I wish there was something
I wish there was something
Oh I wish there was something
I could do

I can't believe it's what I see
That the girl in the mirror
The girl in the mirror
Is me

“It’s me,” she whispered in a voice full of disbelief. “That’s me there in that mirror looking like I just lost my best friend.”
But I did…

He left, the frostiness of his gaze sending a pain through her heart. She didn’t understand it. How could he possibly be so cold and unfeeling after talking to her so normally just the other day? When had this change come about, this decision been made? Confusion and hurt mingled to consume her completely.

I can't believe what I see
No....
The girl in my mirror
The girl in my mirror is me
Ohh...is me

As she sobbed plainly and openly upon her bed, trembling and naked of all feeling except hurt, there was a tentative knock at the door. Her head snapped up. She didn’t want to talk to anyone. She just wanted to be alone.

The knock sounded again, this time more insistent. She groaned through her tears, rolling over and sliding off the bed. Why couldn’t people just leave her by herself in these moments of pain?

She stumbled towards the door, wiping her eyes with the back of one hand. She really didn’t care who saw her like this; anguish all on the surface, visible to the naked eye. Besides no one who wasn’t authorised was allowed on this floor. It was for her and her party only.

She gripped the handle of the door and slowly pulled. As her eyes landed upon the forlorn figure standing in the light from the hallway, she gasped and shook her head, preparing to shut the door once again. But his arm reached out to stop her, grasping her small hand in his and looking at her, straight into her soul.

'Cause the girl in my mirror
Is crying here tonight
And there's nothing I can tell her
To make her feel alright
Oh the girl in my mirror
Is crying 'cause of you
I wish there was something
I wish there was something
Oh I wish there was something
I could do

“Brit?” he questioned cautiously, the pain he himself felt evident in his voice. “I…I’m sorry.” He hung his head, the curly golden tendrils bouncing a little at the movement.

She looked at him, fighting between her anger and her love. Anger took over for the meantime.

“How could you?” she spluttered, eyes flaming. “How could you do this to me and then just leave like nothing meant anything anymore?? Didn’t you think that this would hurt? This is killing me Justin!!” She closed her eyes and attempted to regain some aspect of normalness. “You left me without even saying goodbye….and you hurt me so deeply. You really think a little word like ‘sorry’ is going to fix everything? What I don’t understand….why? Why did you hurt me like that?”

She watched him, searching for some clue as to why all of this had happened.

“I…I couldn’t deal,” he admitted while looking at the floor. “Everyone was pushing….hurting me and hurting you. I hated that. I hated not being able to see you without twenty magazines or newspapers immediately knowing about it. I hated people spreading rumour after rumour about our relationship and everybody – even some of our closest friends – believing them. I hated the way we had to hide, to cover up every little meeting and date with a statement from one of our PR setups. I hated having to keep our relationship a complete secret! So instead of all that, I decided to end it.”

This she understood. She hated it all too. But why did this mean they had to stop seeing each other? They’d gotten through it before, they would again.

“So why are you here?”

He looked up at her, his translucent eyes holding just as much pain as hers did. If that was possible. “Because I’m sorry.”

“Is that all?”

“No,” he confessed. And it all poured out. “No….I missed you too much. I can’t do this. I can’t live without you Brit. I’m sorry for all that I said, but I just realised I can’t do it. I can’t. You’re everything to me.”

She stared at him, seeing the sincerity and hope in his eyes. “Are you sure?”

He nodded furiously. “Of course I’m sure! I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”

She looked down, unsure herself. Could she take it again? Would she be strong enough? Maybe this breaking up was for the best….

Who am I kidding? I need him just as much as he needs me. We’re joined…soul mates.

“Do you promise this will never happen again?”

Once again Justin nodded frantically. “I love you Britney. I know this may sound cheesy, but I always have and I always will.”

“Come here you big lug,” she smiled, grabbing him and hugging. The rest of the tears fell and washed away her remaining anger. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too.”

This was the story so now i ask you to send Anna - the author - some feedback. Thanx.

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