Now you call me a bitch in heat and
I call you a liar
And we'll throw stones until we're dead
Away from here
I wanna be
Away from here
Away from every little thing
Every little thing
I used to love your every little every little thing
Your arms beneath me
Your lying beside me
I used to love your every little every little thing
So call me a bitch in heat and
I'll you a liar
And we'll throw stones until we're dead
~~~~~Throwing Stones, Paula Cole
"Thank you all for coming."
Buffy looked up at the producer of 'The Real World' and was unable to repress a gulp. The others living in the house, who were all seated around the kitchen table, did the same. "Well, we kinda had to, considering," Buffy quipped weakly with a half smile.
The producer sighed. "Listen, this isn't scripted, you guys do understand that, right?" he asked, looking at each one in turn slowly and measuringly, his gaze remaining longest on Angel and Joey.
"Sure we do," Buffy said after no one else said anything. She was wondering how she'd become designated group speaker when the producer spoke again.
"Well, let me tell you, getting cat heads in the mail isn't exactly the norm on this show. This is supposed to be what a group of friends living in a house together would do with another group of friends. See, we were trying to try something different with this, besides total strangers. However, well, there's different and then there's just plain bizarre. This is starting to become more and more bizarre."
"We're sorry," Buffy muttered. "Look, it's just, well, I can't speak for everyone," that she said rather pointedly as she looked around the completely silent group, "but we didn't plan on any of this stuff. Anyway . . . it's unpredictable. Isn't that good?"
The producer threw up his hands in frustration. "No!" he shouted. "Listen to me, if this isn't going to work, let us know. Now. So we have time to get a new cast in here, and we can forget any of this ever happened. Obviously there's something going on here we don't know about." He stared at Buffy steadily, understanding her position as speaker for the group.
"I don't know where you're getting that," Buffy replied simply. "I mean, there's nothing going on, except with Spike." She shrugged slightly. "It's not our fault he's in New York. I swear we didn't set this up before hand, or anything like that, at all. I thought this show was supposed to . . . well . . . show . . . exactly what was going on in the house. I understand if our lives are a little to hot for you guys to handle, I mean if you want something more tame and normal for MTV, then go ahead, but I thought you guys were supposed to be risk takers and the like."
"Fine. We'll give it another few weeks. But if things don't start normaling out somewhat, well, let's just say during the next few weeks we will be exploring alternate cast options." After a moment of silence he continued with, "And confessions. There is supposed to be one a day. Not one every five days. And when you do go to a confession, you're supposed to say what you're thinking and feeling about everyone else." The producer stared at Angel. "And when you're making one, saying more than twenty words would be appreciated."
"Sorry," Angel muttered uninterestedly.
"Arg!" The producer grunted in annoyance before turning around and leaving. As soon as he was gone Buffy began to get a little bit upset at the rest of the group.
"Thanks a lot you guys!" she complained. "Why do I have to be the one doing all the talking?"
"Maybe cause you're the one who wanted to come?" Xander suggested, and Buffy glared at him before leaving as well. Angel followed her out a moment later. Soon the group around the table dispersed, and they all went their seperate ways.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Willow tried not to reveal her real feelings as she spoke with Oz. "You really sound like something's wrong, and I would hate to be the focus point of whatever is bothering you."
"I'm okay, really. There's no reason to worry," Willow said quietly. She wanted to tell him what was going on, that the vampires had tracked down Buffy, that their happy getaway has turned into business as usual. She wanted to tell him that her best friend of forever just slept with someone else. But she didn't. Instead she simply kept repeating, "everything's fine."
"Well you don't sound fine. Far from fine. You know, and I know, that you could tell me, right? If things weren't fine?"
"I know, but I'm fine."
She could hear Oz sighing on the other end. "Okay. As long as you are okay. Do I have to say I miss you? Because I do, miss you."
"I miss you too. I should go now. I'll call you maybe tomorrow."
"How about I come out there? Make sure everything is okay."
Willow thought about it for a minute. "Yeah, okay. I'd like that."
"Good. Then I will see you soon." He hung up the phone. Willow did the same, and leaned back in the chair.
Pacey came into the kitchen where Willow had been talking. "So, how are you?"
"I'm fine, why does everyone keep asking me that?" Willow sounded slightly rude.
But Pacey didn't notice. "Just making sure we are one big happy family! Your man, well, not really your man, but your man just the same, is coming down, so you might want to split."
Willow turned to hear Xander come down the stairs. She slipped out the front door to avoid him. "Guess she's still mad, huh," Xander asked Pacey.
"I don't know man. I can't figure out the female species anymore. It's best that we just leave them alone."
"I just don't get it. I know I hurt her and everything, but it's not like we were dating or anything."
"You know," Pacey started, "that's the problem. You could be with someone, and she could be with someone, but you guys were supposed to have that unwritten law that neither of you would sleep with anyone. Kinda like Dawson, Jen, and Joey. Joey can't have anyone or else Dawson would be mad. Dawson can't have anyone, or else Jen and Joey would be mad. Jen can't have anyone, Dawson would be mad and Joey would be happy. If you ask me, it's all way too complicated." Pacey headed out towards the pool and Xander followed. "You best bet? Stay away from her for a while. Eventually she'll forget about it."
"I don't see Willow forgetting anything."
"Sure she will. You know when you were a kid, and you swore you'd never talk to someone again, but then you had really great news about something and you told them? And after you laughed about it, you remembered you were pissed?"
Xander shook his head in confusion.
"Just trust me. Women forget. Just relax."
"I can't," Xander said stepping into the pool. "Cordelia is coming out here."
"Oh, another female? This could get interesting."
"I'm pretty sure she's coming out here to officially dump me."
"I don't know man, I don't see why any chic would drive all this way to dump someone. She could have done that over the phone. Unless..."
"Unless what," Xander questioned.
"Unless she's coming out here to kick some ass. You know, her and Jen? Catfight! Cool." Pacey jumped off the diving board into the pool.
When he came to the surface, Xander asked, "what should I do then?"
"Stay out of their way? I think Buffy would break it up though. Find out when she's coming, and we'll send Buffy away with her man somewhere. Then we can buy popcorn and see the fight."
Xander shook his head, not really believing he was having this conversation with Pacey.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Buffy was curled up on her bed, holding Mr. Gordo close to her chest, and reading a magazine, when she heard a knock on the door. Looking up, she smiled when Angel walked into the room. "Hey!" she greeted with a smile. "Joey's not out tonight, I take it?"
"Would you stop?"
"Sorry, I'll be good," she replied, motioning towards the bed and waiting as Angel walked over to her and sat down. "So what've you been up to?" she wondered curiously, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.
"Nothing, really," he answered. "Just bored, I guess."
"Oh, well, gee, I feel special now. You're bored so you go visit your girlfriend. I feel the love." She giggled slightly and leaned against him. "I heard from Cordy," she added. "Apparently she and Oz are coming out for a visit. Think she's slightly pissed at Xander, probably going to break up with him."
Angel frowned. "Great. Then he'll be all over you again."
Buffy rolled her eyes heavenward. "Like I'd ever pay any attention to Xander. It took me months to get you out of avoidance mode, I put too much work into you."
"Oh, thanks," he replied somewhat sarcastically.
"Sorry," she said unapologetically, lifting her face up to his. "I think I need to make up for that comment, don't you agree?"
"Cameras?" he reminded her.
"Don't care in the least," she answered, kissing him passionately, and then manuvering herself so she was sitting in his lap. "I'm sure porn would be a great rating's booster."
Angel shook his head. "You know this isn't . . . " he trailed off as she kissed him again, and he wrapped his arms around her. "A good idea," he finished when she pulled away for breath.
"Oh, please," she said. "Making out isn't exactly a crime."
"True," he agreed, his protests trailing off as once again their lips met. "But still, I'd rather not have the world watch us."
Buffy perked up slightly. "I could always threaten the camera guys again," she suggested coyly.
"I don't think that would be a good idea either," he replied.
She rolled her eyes before moving away from him. "Well, we could always just talk," she suggested.
"About?"
"Um . . . the weather. It's a . . . a . . . a lovely night we're having!" she managed. "There's a moon and everything." After a look from Angel she stood up. "Why don't we just go out and see a movie or something?" she asked.
"You want to?"
"Well, look at it this way, a nice, dark movie theatre, no camera's allowed . . . " she trailed off and raised her eyebrows suggestively.
"Works for me," Angel answered, already standing and holding out his hand for hers.
Buffy and Angel came down the stairs, greeting Dawson in the living room. "Dawson, just the man I wanted to see."
Dawson looked at Buffy curiously. "What's up?"
"Angel and I wanted to go see a movie. And you being the, well, movie man that you are, I was wondering what you would recommend."
Dawson thought about it for a moment. "Out of all the movies that are out right now, I would probably suggest the X-Files. I mean you might have to be interested in that sort of thing, but Chris Carter is really an awesome writer."
"That sounds like fun, thanks!"
~*~*~*~*~*~
About an hour later, Jen came down into the living room. Dawson was still seated on the couch. He looked up to see Jen, then continued with his movie.
"Dawson, you can't keep avoiding me like this."
"I'm not avoiding you Jen."
"Yes Dawson, you are."
"Jen, I don't really want to have this conversation with you right now."
"Dawson," she began in protest. He looked passed her to see Joey standing on the steps.
"Joey, hey."
"Hi Dawson," Joey said as she walked down the stairs. She walked passed Jen without saying a word. "Want to go swimming?"
"I think Xander and Pacey are out there."
"Good, let's go," Joey pushed.
Dawson gave Joey a look, then looked at Jen and looked back at Joey. Joey just shrugged and went towards the kitche. When Dawson heard the back door close, he stood up to follow her. "Jen, you can come too if you want."
Jen shook her head and ran back upstairs.
~*~*~*~*~*~
"So, what did you think of the movie?" Buffy asked Angel as they left the movie theatre later that night.
Angel looked at her with an amused expression. "I don't know," he replied. "I didn't get to see that much of it."
Buffy shrugged sheepishly. "Yeah, well . . . " she trailed off and smiled. "I think we should see it again. Now."
"It's already four in the morning, Buffy," Angel informed her.
"Damn. Tomorrow?" she suggested.
"You're impossible, you know that," he told her.
"Yeah, but you love me anyway," she answered, leaning her head up for a kiss, which he gave to her.
"True," he conceded with the slightest nod of his head. He suddenly stopped walking, and Buffy looked at him with some concern as he looked down to see a small black cat rubbing against his leg. "That's odd," he murmured.
"What?" Buffy asked, bending down to look at the cat and smiling slightly. "She likes you." She reached her hand out to pet it, but the cat immediately lifted it's paw to smack her.
"Animals of any kind usually don't like vamp . . . um . . . " Unable to think of a good cover word Angel just shrugged slightly as he bent down as well. The cat immediately continued rubbing against him, then jumped up into his arms. Again Buffy attempted to pet it, and again the cat attacked her.
"I don't like that cat," Buffy said grouchily looking up at Angel. He placed the cat back on the street and Buffy moved next to him, eyeing the cat jealously.
"Buffy," Angel said, exasperated, as he saw the predatory way Buffy was watching the animal.
"It could be some shape shifting woman or something," Buffy told him heatedly, glaring at the cat that continued to rub against Angel. "I mean it wouldn't be the first time we've encountered . . . " she stopped, suddenly remembering the cameras, and as Angel had done just decided not to continue that thought. "After all, we just got a dead cat's head in the mail, we don't need to actually have a live cat around."
"I wasn't planning on bringing it home, Buffy," Angel said in annoyance. "Obviously it doesn't have good judgement if it doesn't like you."
Buffy's expression immediately softened and she leaned over to kiss him, but the cat hissed at her. She pulled away and grabbed Angel's hand. "Let's get away from that damn thing."
Angel rolled his eyes but followed her, and the cat followed them both.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Xander walked into the kitchen to see the others drying off, and he immediately turned to leave, not wanting to face Willow. Unfortunately upon his retreat he bumped into Joey. "Sorry," he muttered.
"It's okay," Joey answered, finishing drying her hair and placing the towel on the counter. "How're you doing?"
"Fine," Xander replied, surprised by the question.
"It's just . . . I can understand how awkward all this has to be," Joey explained.
Xander, desperately needing someone impartial to talk to, decided he had nothing to lose. "Thanks," he answered, relieved. "I don't even like her," he added. "I mean, as a friend she's okay, but she's not someone I want relationship wise. I don't know what I was thinking." Realizing he was babbling he stopped himself.
Joey smiled. "I know how that is," she agreed, thinking of times when she'd tried to make Dawson jealous with little to no success. She was unable to stop herself from glancing in the direction of the movie buff, who was currently also drying himself off.
Xander read the expression on her face and smiled slightly. "At least I'm not the only screw up," he told her, then winced. "Sorry, that didn't come off exactly how I meant it to."
"It's okay," she told him. "So if you didn't like Jen, why'd you sleep with her?"
"I have no idea," he said with a shrug. "I used to like Buffy, Willow's in love with me, and Cordelia and I are majorly involved. I don't know what I was thinking," he repeated, miserably.
Joey put her hand on his shoulder, and then surprised him and her by pulling him into a sympathetic hug.
~*~*~*~*~*~
"Hey, Cordy!" Buffy greeted as she and Angel came in view of the townhouse and saw Cordelia and Oz pulling up in a rented car. Cordelia got out, smiled wanly, and leaned against the car.
"Hey Buffy," she answered. Then immediatley her expression brightened. "Angel."
Angel strategically moved himself slightly behind Buffy, allowing her to hide him from the fashion queen as they continued walking towards the door. "Come out to kill Xander?" Buffy asked conversationally.
"Yup," Cordelia said, nodding slightly. "And then I think it's far past time I moved on, I mean, obviously Xander's to much of a hormonal teenager to handle someone like me." The last was said with a look in Angel's direction, causing the vampire to move ahead towards the door, casually talking to Oz as they made their way inside. "Seriously, I don't know what to say to him," Cordelia confessed as she and Buffy followed a few steps behind.
"Just tell him you hate him and then beat the crap out of him," Buffy suggested to the cheerleader.
"That's the problem," Cordelia said quietly. "I DON'T hate him." She looked at Angel’s feet. “Hey guys, what’s with the cat?” Buffy looked to see that the cat had followed them home. “Oh, she’s in love with him.” The two walked inside, and Cordelia's eyes narrowed as she saw Xander hugging a girl with brownish hair. Moving forward, Cordelia put her hand on the girl's shoulder. When she moved away to look up, Cordelia smiled sweetly before forming a fist and punching her, causing her to fall down to the floor.