We [why do I always say we? Oh well...] find ourselves at Seventh Heaven, with Cloud, Yuffie, Cid, Vincent and Elena.

Cloud: How come shes always hanging out with us? She's the enemy for crying out loud!
Cid: Shut up Cloud! She's my and Vincent's friend, so she stays!
Cloud: (mutters) Old coot...
Cid: Say that again!
Cloud: Uh, what?! I didnt say anything, it was Yuffie!
Yuffie: Hey! Why me, its always me!
Vincent: Because you are usually the one who causes all the trouble around here...
Yuffie: Nobody asked you, you vampire!
Elena: Dont call him that!
Yuffie: I can call him that anytime I want to, blond bimbo!
Elena: Thats it! (attacks Yuffie and they start a cat fight)
Vincent: Ladies...please....
Cid: Shut up! Dont you know how exciting these cat fights can get?
Cloud: Yeah Vincent. It wasnt easy to get them to fight, so let us enjoy ourselves.
Vincent: You guys staged this?
Cid: Yup. Now if I could only get Shera to come over....
Vincent: *Sigh* At least you're not making any bets...
Cloud: Bets?! I knew I forgot something! Oh well, Cid, I bet ya 10 gil Yuffie kicks Elena's butt!
Cid: Youre on! How about it vampy? You in or what?
Vincent: OK, I got 20 gil says Elena will be the victor.
Cloud: Alright, its your money...

Elena and Yuffie are still fighting each other, but Elena manages a lucky punch and knocks Yuffie out cold.

Cid: Yahoo!
Vincent: Boo-ya!
Cloud: I hate it when you guys win! (pays them their money).
Elena: Ow! Im really hurt here, could someone help me?
Cloud: Not me! You made me lose my money!
Cid: Dont be so rude to her!
Cloud: I can be as rude as I want to!
Cid: Oh yeah?
Cloud: Yeah!
Cid: Thats it! (attacks Cloud).
Vincent: (to Elena) I doubted you could do that. (helps her up).
Elena: What? Make them fight? That was easy, now, about my money...
Vincent: (sweatdrop) Uh, I spent it on that new transmission for my car! Yeah!
Elena: Oh, in that case you have to pay me another way...
Vincent: Uh-oh...

At the Golden Saucer....

Elena: Come on Vincent! Let's go to the Speed Square!
Vincent: Do you delight in torturing me?
Elena: No...but if you dont like it, we could go check out that play about some dragon and princess!
Vincent: D'oh!

During the play... (they were the 100th couple or whatever)[I forgot some of the dialogue, so sue me!]

Knight: Oh! You must be the legendary hero, Alfred!
Vincent: (thinking) Should I kill this guy? Nah...too many witnesses...(out lout) Um, yeah...
Knight: You must save the princess from the Evil Dragon King, but first talk to the king! (King and Wizard walk in)
Vincent: (thinking)The things I do for that woman...(out loud) Um, so what's the deal with the dragon?
King: The Evil Dragon King has taken my daughter, you must save her! Talk to the person who can help you!
Vincent: (thinking) Who did Cloud tell me he talked to? (walks to wizard) (a tomato hits him) (thinks) Wrong person--Hey! Who threw that?! If I find out, I'll kill them!

In the audience..

Rude: Nice shot Reno!
Reno: I suppose, but I was aiming for his face....
Rude: We still have time to embarrass him, then maybe Elena will come back to us!
Reno: Yeah, would you like some popcorn?

The play...

Vincent: OK wizard, I would like to know, uh, the princess measurements, I think...
Wizard: This is no time to have fun! But look, the Evil Dragon King comes and he has the princess with him!
Elena: Please save me my hero! (winks and whispers to the dragon) Now remember what I told you to say!
EDK: *Growl* I will return the princess on one condition, the great hero must swear his undying love for the princess!
Vincent: ....! (thinks) $#%^&&%$$#$# ??!!! That's not what he's supposed to say! Oh well, Ill play along I guess...but how to make it convincing...?
Reno: What the hell?! Thats not what he says!
Rude: Look at that vampire! He's blushing!
Reno: Of course! He made the actor say that! I will kill him!
Rude: Who? The actor or fang-boy?
Reno: (pauses) Both...
Vincent: I, uh, (sweatdrop) I love Elena with all my heart...
EDK: You gotta do better than that!
Vincent: Im not finished yet! Uh, She, uh (gets an idea) she is my moon and stars, her beauty outdoes the goddesses of time past, her voice is like honey, without her I dwell in total darkness...
Elena: (wipes a tear away)That's so sweet!
EDK: Your words have touched my soul, I will let the princess go free! (aims Elena at Vincent, but pushed her too hard and she falls flat on her face) Oops...
Elena: (on the floor) Ow!
Vincent: You bastard! (turns into Chaos) *ROAR* (EDK runs offstage where Vincent follows, curtain goes down)

Later, at the food court....

Vincent: I'm sorry Elena...
Elena: Sorry? About what?
Vincent: For beating the crap outta that guy...
Elena: Oh dont worry about him, that was so romantic of you though...(hearts in her eyes)
Vincent: Really?
Elena: Mm-hmm.
Vincent: Elena, would you like to, uh, I mean, would it be OK with you if--
Reno: No, it wouldnt be OK!
Rude: ....
Elena: Reno! Rude! What are you guys doing here?!
Reno: Protecting you from yourself! Can't you see?! He's manipulating you!
Elena: Huh?
Reno: (thinks) D'oh! I forgot what I was gonna say.... (out loud) Rude, explain to her.
Rude: Who me?!
Reno: Yes you!
Rude: (mutters)
Vincent and Reno: Stop muttering!
Reno: ???
Vincent: He often did that when he was a rookie while I was a Turk.
Reno: Oh...
Rude: Whoa! You are/were Vincent Valentine, AKA The Knight?
Vincent: (blushing) Um...yeah...
Reno: You are the Knight?! The greatest Turk that ever lived?!
Rude: The best leader in the force.
Elena: I never knew YOU were the Knight...
Vincent: Aww...shucks...(thinks) Did I just say shucks?! Oh yeah Vincent, that'll get Elenas respect....yeah right, you idiot! (out loud) I wasn't that good...
Reno: Then how come you were the only employee Scarlet wanted to make it with, but she had to pay you instead of vice-versa?
Elena: You made it with that slut?!
Vincent: No! I just accepted her money and ordered a certain rookie to trade places with me...sorry 'bout that...
Rude: Its OK, but I still miss my hair....
Reno: You had hair?!
Vincent: It was almost as good as mine.
Rude: Yup, some would say better....
Vincent: (getting annoyed) Some would also be dead...
Rude: (sweatdrop) But the Knight's was the best!
Vincent: (nods) Hmm....remember the time we got Palmer to stick that fountain pen up his nose?
Rude: Yeah, those were the days...
Elena: *AHEM*
Vincent and Rude: ???
Elena: What about me?!
Reno: Lets go to a movie!
Elena: Uh, sure...
Reno: Nope, nevermind, I got a date with Hooterville--I mean Tifa!
Elena: You jerk! (thinks) How can I avenge myself? I know.... (to Vincent) Vincent, he hurt my feelings...(gives him Bambi eyes)
Vincent: Grrr...Reno apologize!
Rude: Yeah Reno, dont forget what happened to that dragon guy...
Reno: Alright, I'm sorry Elena...
Elena: I accept your apology (thinks) Though I would prefer your blood...oh well...

Later...on the Gondola ride....

Vincent: So, um Elena...
Elena: (hearts in eyes) Yes Vincent?
Vincent: Um...(hears something) Hold on a sec...(looks under his seat and finds Cait Sith, minus his moogle)
Cait: Hey man! Uh, what's up?
Vincent: Come here! (pulls out the cat by his tail) What are you doing if I may ask?
Cait: Ow! Watch the tail, man! It's very sensitive!
Vincent: *Sigh* (drops Cait next to him)
Cait: Ow! (rubs his tail) So, uh, nice night, isnt it?
Elena: What are you doing here?!
Cait: Ill never say, do you hear me?! Never!
Vincent: Is that so? (pulls his Death Penalty from the holster)
Cait: (sweating profusely) It was Cloud! He told me to come here to spy on you guys!
Elena: Cloud?
Cait: Alright! Reno also paid me to come here too!
Vincent: (sarcastically) Is that all?
Cait: No, Sephiroth was another guy...
Vincent: Sephiroth?!
Cait: He has another bet with Kefka...
Elena: Another?
Vincent: He made a bet that I would some day curse, which I did....what's the bet this time?
Cait: That you score with Elena...
Vincent and Elena: What?!
Cait: Don't get mad at me!
Vincent: Why that arrogant little--
Elena: Hey Vincent, lets beat the crap out of him!
Vincent: Good idea!

At the Northern Cave....

Sephiroth: Mwahahahaha! I'm sure to win the bet now!
Vincent: (stepping out of the shadows) Oh yeah?
Seph: Vincent?! Uh, what are you doing here?!
Vincent: Me and my woman were just in the neighborhood and decided to look you up, isnt that right Elena?
Elena: (joining Vincent) Thats right. Were here for a little payback, Sephiroth.
Seph: (sweatdrop) Payback?
Elena: For messing with our lives! Die! (attacks Seph)
Seph: ....! (blocks and evades Elenas attacks)(thinking) I should kill her, but if I even mess up her hair, Vincent will kick my ass...what should I do?
Elena: (thinks) If Vincent doesnt get mad, he wont turn into Chaos, and if he doesnt turn into Chaos...wait! I know....Mwahahahaha....(rams into Sephiroth and falls back, then gives Vincent her Bambi eyes) Vincent....
Vincent: (thinks) I have the feeling shes manipulating me...oh well (turns into Chaos) *ROAR*
Seph: Yipes! (vanishes)
Vincent: (now normal) You OK, Elena?
Elena: Yeah, do you want to continue our day at the Gold Saucer?
Vincent: Sure, but lets go check out that new casino area, yeah?
Elena: You a gambling man?
Vincent: Yeah, you ever heard of a man called Setzer Gabbianni?
Elena: I think so, he was a gambler who helped destroy Kefka, right?
Vincent: Yup, he was also my Great-great-great-great-great-great-uh, lost count....grandfather.

At the casino area....

Vincent: (playing poker) I have a full house, kings high.
Other guy: Hmm...close...Full House, ACES high!
Vincent: DIE! (turns into Chaos) *ROAR*

The end ^-^