...Continued
The Sunday morning sun had risen hours before and his mother finally retired to the rented hotel room after the fever holding Nick finally let loose and disappeared. Jarrod sat by his sleeping brother’s bed, his chin resting on his fist when he looked over at the opening door. Suddenly, the suave, sophisticated attorney jumped up onto his feet. His calm demeanor replaced with an unexpected wave of uneasiness and wariness at the arrival of the sapphire eyed blonde with one of his ranch hands. The very young man who had occupied his thoughts the night before and into the morning.
On his crutches, Heath stood six inches inside the room meeting the eyes of his neighbor before shifting sideways to look at Shorty and drawling, “Shorty, send the wire and I’ll meet you at the sheriff’s office when I’m finished.”
“Sure, boss.” replied Shorty, hesitating for a brief moment before leaving.
“Heath, how are you?” questioned Jarrod quietly, recovering his calmness after the unexpected arrival.
Cocking his head slightly, Heath studied the older man before lowering his eyes and sighing, “I’m fine.”
“Sure..you..are..brother.” groaned Nick weakly, his words taking the other two men in the room by surprise.
The weak spoken words took Heath by surprise, his stunned eyes reflected his inner thought before he took a breath and Jarrod watched him shut down emotionally.
“Heath.” whispered Nick, slowing lifting two fingers and motioning the blonde to come closer.
Crossing the room, Heath reached the side of the bed and leaned on his crutches, holding a hand out which was grabbed by the weak rancher. "I just came by ta say thanks, Nick.”
Nick felt the beating of his heart stop for the briefest of time at the lack of emotion in the sapphire eyes, the weariness in the blonde’s face denoted the cost of the discovery. Nick suddenly felt an overwhelming need to extract a promise from the man before him, a promise of time. He didn’t understand it but knew it was needed and he knew it had to be a promise he obtained today.
“I’m…fine.” said Nick trying to push himself up in the bed, wanting to be eye level with his new brother, gasping in pain and scowling when Jarrod chastised him.
“Dammit, Nick! Lay down or you’ll rip out your stitches!”
Heath watched the interaction between the two men, the two who’d grown up together, the two who had the same father as him. He closed his eyes for a moment at the feeling of wonder at the brotherly touch Jarrod used on his injured sibling. The eldest son’s hand squeezed Nick’s shoulder, held his hand in support and wiped the sweat the movement caused the dark haired man to expend in his weak condition.
Heath felt an overwhelming need to feel what he’d missed experiencing during his childhood, the loving touch of a father with a hand on his shoulder, a tousling of hair. He’d never had it and never would. Again his mind screamed out why? WHY?
Suddenly he opened his eyes at the feeling of two sets on him and reached into his pocket, pulling out the key. Picking up Nick’s hand closest to him, he saw the frown on the faces of the brothers when he placed the key into the large hand. The large hand dwarfed the piece of metal.
“Thanks, Nick but we’re putting our honeymoon off for a while.” explained Heath quietly, releasing the large wrist and stepping back slightly from the bed.
“Heath..” said Jarrod, his words stopped by the hand which suddenly covered his. The hazel eyes of his younger brother were intensely staring into the sapphire eyes of the new brother.
“Don’t..do..it” whispered Nick, his words causing a furrow to appear across Heath’s forehead from his deep frown, his puzzlement showing.
“Don’t do what?” asked Heath softly, his eyes lowering before the intense glare of the other’s, mentally chastising himself for not being able to match the glare, his innards doing a mexican hat dance from his turmoil.
“Don’t…leave.” whispered Nick, his pain medicine wearing off, his back on fire. Jarrod saw the signs and left the room to get Dr. Merar.
“Barkley..” drawled Heath, his words stopped by Nick’s gasp, the pallor of his face turning whiter. Concern and worry speared out of the sapphire eyes and he grabbed the closest hand, wincing from the strong grip. “Nick?”
“Wait..til..I’m..better.” moaned Nick, his face breaking out with perspiration. “Promise..me..time.”
Holding the large hand in both of his, Heath wanted to say no, he wanted to tell this man he didn’t think time would help. He wanted to escape this new reality. He wanted to escape his thoughts. He wanted to flee like a rabbit dodging the coyote. He wanted to flee like a mouse scampering away from it’s feline enemy. He wanted to run as fast as Charger across the grassy lands.
He wanted to do all those things and yet, he found himself giving his word, promising the time his new brother lying on the bed wanted.
“I promise, Nick. Just til you’re better.” stated Heath, relief filling him when the physician appeared with Jarrod and laudanum was administered. The hand gripping his slackened as the pain lessened, the pain killer taking the wounded man back into sleep.
Heath’s word was as binding as a legal contract when given. He gave Nick Barkley his word and even though he said the words, he silently wished he wasn’t a man of character, a man of his word. Now, he was bound to his word and bound to the promise.
Placing the large hand on the bed, Heath nodded to Jarrod and turned, making his way into the outer room, groaning inwardly at the sound of footsteps following him. Jarrod followed and put a hand on Heath’s arm when he reached the waiting room.
“Heath, we need to talk.” said Jarrod, his legal mind needing proof, his inner self telling him the proof was right before him.
Turning to the man, Heath shook his head, “I can’t, not right now, Jarrod.”
Nodding in understanding, Jarrod sighed, “Then, listen to me, okay?”
Lowering his eyes, Heath gave a slight nod of his head and stared at the floor as the soft, words danced like a flower in the wind from the lawyer’s mouth. His tone soothing and gentle, his message loud and clear.
They had another family member and the Barkley family would not willing give up without a fight. He was one of them and he belonged within their family, the family would see to it legally.
Heath felt a bitterness rise up within him and his hands clenched the grips on the crutches, his jaw clenched against the anger he suddenly felt. His head snapped up and where previously there was no emotion, his sapphire eyes burned out of control, his words hissed when they left his mouth. To the lawyer, the tone was firm and heated, the message loud and clear.
He was born the bastard son of the mighty Thomas Barkley, born in a mining camp to a child recently turned woman. He may be from a Barkley but he knew exactly where he belonged and where the rest of the world knew he belonged.
The hurt and shock in Jarrod’s eyes at his furious words left Heath with a false sense of satisfaction. He’d never in his life lashed out and hurt another person out of spite but he did this day and he knew he’d regret it later when his conscience spoke to him, when he searched his heart after his mind was clear of rage.
When the door closed behind the departing blonde brother, Jarrod felt a cold hand of dread grab him and he realized the error he’d made. In his quest to make Heath understand the family would accept him, he hadn’t considered the possibility that perhaps the blonde would not accept the family. He hadn’t considered the possibility of the anger the blonde would experience at hearing his father had been wealthy while he’d grown up poor and struggling.
He hadn’t considered the possibility because he’d been too busy considering the legal side of the issues and he’d forgotten the human factor.
A boy’d been born out of wedlock. This would have made him and his mother outcasts of the town. Even the most christian of people would’ve spurned the outcasts in the blink of an eye.
He’d forgotten the human factor and he was ashamed.
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Heath’s jaw hurt from the clenching of its muscles, his hands were clenched on the hand holds of his crutches and his eyes stormed in their depths as he made his way to the office of Fred Madden. The signs of fury, the signs of rage were there for anyone to see, for anyone to notice, if they looked.
However, Audra Barkley, the only daughter of Tom and Victoria Barkley, as headstrong and protective of her family members as they were of her, didn’t look. She didn’t see the signs and in all honesty, her blue eyes quickly filled with their own storminess when she walked down the boardwalk to the office of Dr. Merar and saw Heath Thomson.
The only saving grace from her fierce inherited temper that Sunday for Audra Barkley on the streets of Stockton was her gender. The object of her anger was hobbling towards her and her blonde mane raised on its hackles. She didn’t stop to look at the signs the other blonde was emanating, she didn’t stop to think of how he felt, she didn’t stop to think he was an innocent victim from the actions of two people years before.
The problem was she didn’t stop to think, she just reacted. The clashing of the two blondes was like two immovable objects colliding, like the grating of two plates in the San Andrea fault line. It was explosive and it was not for the fate of heart.
Her tongue was as sharp as the end of the whip used on him in Carterson prison, her words cut just as deep, drew just as much blood. He had to fight the urge to reach out and shake the girl, fight the urge to scream outright at her. If she’d been a man, he’d have swung a fist to stop the wickedness of her mouth.
“I don’t believe you.” sneered Audra with contempt, having forgotten it seemed the time spent the past months with the blonde and his new wife.
The time spent in the company of the happy couple, the fun times, the joyous times seemed to have simply evaporated overnight. Audra’d quickly become friends with the auburn haired, violet eyed woman and the man she loved. She’d been Mackenzie’s maid of honor the day before and was deeply honored when asked to fulfill the responsibilities of the position. An observer to the boardwalk scene would have thought that’d been impossible based on the reaction of the two people to each other.
The female voice loaded with contempt stirred the boiling pot inside the man even higher. Contempt was one of the emotions capable of driving the blonde over the edge. Contempt was what he’d heard growing up, always contempt out of the mouths of people who every Sunday sat in church, pretending to be shocked at the sins committed around them. Ironically, they themselves sinned when they treated he and his mother with contempt.
When it came to the town bastard and his mother, the rule of do unto others as you’d have them do unto you, didn’t apply. Their voices were always loaded with contempt, their tongues just as sharp. No matter what people preached, words could hurt as much as sticks and stones. At least with sticks and stones, a doctor could patch you up. With word wounds, there was no healing for the inner hurts. No bandage could be applied, no stitching, no pain medicine strong enough to reach it. From the experience of the boy turned too quickly into a man, there was nothing worse than the hurt inside. From his past experience, those who sought to hurt you inside were the type of people who’d kick a dog for the sheer fun of it.
“I’m not havin’ any discussions with you.” hissed Heath, his dander in an uproar and he tried to move past her, knowing the trip into town had already caused more upset that he didn’t want to deal with and he wasn’t actively looking for any more.
Audra grabbed onto his arm roughly, her body rigid with anger, her face red with fury as she leaned in front of his face. “My brother took a bullet for you! You could at least have the decency to make sure he was gonna live before skulking off! He was calling for you in his fever and YOU WEREN’T THERE!”
Yanking his arm out of her hold, he pushed her back a step, taking her face out of his, “I don’t skulk and he’s my brother too thanks to your daddy who wasn’t happy in his own backyard!”
“DON’T TALK ABOUT HIM THAT WAY! HE WAS A GREAT MAN! EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT!” shouted Audra, her voice carrying down the street, stopping several people and causing Mackenzie who was walking with Rachel to come running at the outburst.
“GUESS HE’S NOT SO GREAT NOW, IS HE LITTLE SISTER?” snapped Heath, his head turning from the slap of her hand, his cheek red with the imprint.
Victoria stepped out of the hotel intent on making her way back to the doctor’s office and stopped in her tracks at the scream of outrage from her daughter, the crack of a slap sent her feet flying.
Heath’s body shook with rage and he shouted for her to answer his question, his demand and her fury bringing tears to her eyes. Mackenzie reached the two siblings before anyone else and stepped between them.
“STOP IT! RIGHT NOW!”
Heath felt his wife’s hand on his chest and he clenched his jaw tightly. Audra saw the imprint of her hand on his face and turned away, satisfaction on her face when her arm was grabbed and she was turned back.
“Audra, what is going on?” demanded Victoria, the fury on both faces of the blondes plain to see. “I asked you a question young lady!”
Shorty and Fred walked to the group standing on the boardwalk, the confrontation reported to them by a concerned citizen who’d been afraid of the consequences from the anger.
“I’m going to see Nick.” snapped Audra, glaring into the other blonde’s eyes, her message loud and clear to him. “At least I care if he lives or dies!”
Mackenzie heard the sharp intake of breath from her husband at her friend’s statement and pushed harder into his chest, her words asking him to calm down went unheeded, both tempers flaring as hot as the afternoon sun above them.
“WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?” shouted Heath furiously after Victoria’s ice-laden voice censured her daughter into silence.
Mackenzie felt suddenly as if she was trapped in a forest fire, her cheeks flared up suddenly with heat, her vision wavered. The emotion, the oppressive anger thickening the air around the two sent her reeling and she was unaware she was caught by her husband’s two strong arms as he fell to the boardwalk screaming her name.
In a flash of a second, the anger left the blonde’s body and love took it’s place. His shaking hand caressed her cheek, his arms held her still body and he didn’t notice his Aunt was there by his side until he heard her voice. Victoria and Audra knelt down, reaching out to help Rachel and his voice sent a chill through them when he pushed their hands away.
“Don’t you dare touch her! Just stay away from us! All of you!”
The memory came rushing back, faster than a hummingbird’s wing, the scene assaulted him in his mind, taking his breath away. Closing his eyes tightly, he moved his head as if he were in sudden pain, seeking to drive it back to the deep recesses of his mind, almost desperate to keep it wrapped up in the cloak of darkness the corners of his mind contained.
The memory’d been sparked by the look in the woman’s eyes at the venom in his snapped words. The hurt and anguish were a look he’d seen before in the eyes of another. It was the look of a mother in great pain, at a loss of what to do to help a child in torment. It was the look his own mother often wore after he came home from the war. It was the look his own mother’s eyes would show when his rage boiled to the surface and spilled over.
It was the look in Victoria Barkley’s eyes which thrust the memory from the past forward.
He carried inside a great deal of respect for the Barkley matriarch. She was the embodiment of love, the embodiment of strength. He’d witnessed it first hand from his visits to the Barkley ranch, the dinners spent there, the times laughing and playing games. He’d witnessed the inner soul of the woman, her caring for those around her, the unselfish giving of herself to others.
He’d witnessed all these things, he’d marveled at her character and he’d always felt welcome in her presence. He felt shame rise up within him and he turned his eyes upwards to her.
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Barkley.” whispered Heath. “I shouldn’t have raised my voice to you.”
Placing a small hand on top of his which held his unconscious wife to his chest, she shook her head and said softly, “You have nothing to apologize for Heath. We need to get Mackenzie to Dr. Merar’s.”
Gazing down at the pale woman in his arms, Heath slowly released his hold on his wife and Shorty took her from him.
“Aunt Rachel will go with you, Shorty. I’ll be right behind you.” said Heath receiving a nod from his aunt before she hurried beside the crew member carrying Mackenzie.
Fred knelt beside Heath and helped him up to lean against the building, handing the crutches to the blonde and speaking in his ear, for a moment.
“Thanks, Fred.” drawled Heath with an appreciative nod. “I appreciate that.”
Fred patted the former bounty hunter on the shoulder and watched as he made his way down the boardwalk, Victoria and Audra following a few steps behind. Entering the room he departed only a few minutes earlier, Heath saw the look of surprise in Jarrod’s eyes after he entered the waiting area from Nick’s room, his hat in his hands.
“Heath? I thought you were going to Fred’s when you left here.” stated Jarrod, noting the look of almost defeat in the sapphire eyes before he turned away from the attorney and sat in a corner chair. Leaning forward with elbows on his knees, he resumed the same stance as the other night, when they were waiting for word on their brother.
Confused, Jarrod started towards the blonde, stopping when his mother and sister entered the building. The women wearing a look of concern and worry on their faces.
“Jarrod, will you take Audra into Nick’s room? I’ll stay out here.” stated Victoria, her eyes relaying to her son not to ask questions, knowing her daughter would fill in the blanks where needed.
“Certainly, Mother.” said Jarrod, leading his sister into Nick’s room and closing the door.
Victoria watched her two children enter the room of Nick and she made a mental note to have a discussion with her girl later. Taking a breath, she sat in the chair next to Heath’s, the impulse to reach out and touch the tormented young man had her hand reaching towards him. Realizing the fragility of the physically strong man beside her, she laid her hand back in her lap. She was afraid she’d cause him more pain, more torment.
“I’m sorry too, Heath.” offered Victoria softly.
Lifting his head from his hands, the sapphire eyes met the gray eyes and he inquired, “Why? Why are you apologizing? You didn’t do anything wrong, ma’am.”
Lowering her eyes, the grand woman before him felt a rush of tears spring into her eyes and she shook her head. “I’m sorry for the pain all of us have gone through these past two days. I’m sorry I didn’t realize when I first looked into your eyes why I felt you were familiar.”
“Mrs. Barkley, lots of people have blue eyes.” sighed Heath. “That’s no reason to blame yourself.”
“Perhaps for most people that would be a true statement, Heath.” admitted Victoria, her gray eyes glistening with wetness. “Not for someone who has your eyes though. The sapphire color, the shape of your eyes and the way you convey your emotions through them…that’s a Barkley trait. Both Tom and his brother, John, had the same eyes.”
Wiping a hand over his face, Heath took a shaky breath before sitting back in his chair, whispering quietly. “Mrs. Barkley, I can’t talk about this. I don’t know what’s up and down anymore. I don’t know if I’m coming or going. I can’t do it.”
“I know, Heath. I’ve been feeling the same way.” agreed Victoria, reaching out and placing a hand on his forearm, searching the soulful, telling eyes.
“We are both innocent victims, Heath. Innocent in the sense we are now affected by the actions years ago of two people. When you’re ready, I’ll be here and perhaps we can find the answers we need together. Whatever they may be, good or bad, no matter what the truth may hold.”
The offer of her support in the search for the truth surprised the blonde. He hadn’t expected it and he admired the strength she was showing him. Whatever the answer, he knew she would want the truth above all else, no matter the cost to herself or the memories of her husband, no matter the cost of the family in the eyes of the community. She wanted the truth and it showed in her gray eyes.
His eyes left her at the entrance of Dr. Merar and Heath stood up.
“How is Zie?” asked Heath, his heart stopping til he heard the man’s voice.
“Sit down for a moment and we’ll talk.” smiled Howard waiting til the blonde was seated again, taking a seat on the table in front of him. Victoria stood to leave and Heath’s voice stopped her.
“You can stay, ma’am.” said Heath turning his attention to the physician, suddenly feeling a moment of great fear. “She’s not sick or anything, is she?”
“Heath, Mackenzie is dehydrated and fainted because she hadn’t really eaten since yesterday morning.” explained Howard. “You’ve both been under a great amount of stress and I think it, well, aggravated the situation. Miss Caulfield if giving her some juice but when you get her home, I want you to make sure she takes in lots of fluids and gets some rest.”
Smiling with relief, Heath nodded and shook the physician’s hand. “Can I see her?”
“Sure, she’s in the room next to Nick.” smiled Howard watching the blonde enter the room and his aunt depart.
Mackenzie was sitting up on the examining table when her husband came into the room and approached the bed. Sitting beside her, he pulled her into his arms and placed a kiss on her forehead. “Ya’ scared me, Zie. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, Heath.” assured Mackenzie. “I didn’t mean to scare you, honey.”
Lifting her chin, he placed a tender kiss on her lips and winked, “Well, you certainly got my attention, darlin’ and stopped the fight.”
Tears sprang into her eyes and Heath stammered, “What is it, Zie? Honey?”
“Heath, you and Audra were both so angry with each other!” exclaimed Mackenzie, dismay quivering her voice, his fingertips brushed her tears off her cheeks.
“I know, Zie and I’m sorry for what happened. Fred’s gonna come out to the ranch tomorrow so I don’t have to come back into town.” said Heath, running his fingers through her hair and gazing into the violet eyes. “I just want to go home and try to spend the rest of the day in peace and quiet with you.”
Nodding, Mackenzie wrapped her arms around him and whispered, “Let’s go home.”
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Closing the door behind his sister, Jarrod was surprised when Audra fell into his arms and burst out into tears. Sobbing against his shirt, he couldn’t hear her words and he rubbed her back while the tears fell. Several minutes passed before the water receded and she took his handkerchief, drying her eyes and wiping her face.
“Audra, what’s happened?” asked Jarrod brushing back a piece of blonde hair that escaped from the others.
Biting her lip, Audra shook her head and stammered, “It’s all my fault, Jarrod!”
“What’s all your fault, honey?” puzzled Jarrod.
“Dr. Merar is examining Mackenzie and it’s all my fault!” exclaimed Audra pulling out of his arms and using her hands to empathize her words. “I don’t know what got into me!”
Taking a deep breath, Jarrod grabbed his expressive sister by the shoulders and stared into her light blue eyes. “Audra, calm down and start from the beginning. Why is the doctor examining Mackenzie?”
Confusion flew across her face and she whined, “Jarrod, do you want me to start from the beginning or tell you about Mackenzie first?”
Nodding, Jarrod sighed, “Start from the beginning, honey.”
Wringing the material in between her fingers, Audra’s shaky voice slowly relayed the morning events to her big brother, the man who’d stepped in when their father was taken from them. The man who’d always listened to her worries, concerns, dreams. The man who’d slowly turned from brother to pappy when he stepped in to take the place of their fallen father.
She was ashamed of attacking Heath on the boardwalk, in broad daylight, in front of the whole town. She had aired the family’s dirty laundry out in a public forum, she’d not fallen the example her mother and father set over the years. Family business, discussions or disagreements were to never be shown outside the mansion. In order to succeed, the family had to portray a united front to outside eyes. In the Barkley family, there was no divide and conquer.
She just couldn’t control her temper, lack of sleep from replaying Nick’s heroic act kept playing out in her dreams, turning them into nightmares. The sound of him crying out for their new brother in his feverish state fueled her temper and she readily jumped on the opportunity which presented itself.
The light blue eyes were filled with regret, disappointment and sadness as the story slowly unfolded. Audra had made a large mistake that morning as he had also. They’d both handled their separate situations badly, with inappropriate words, inappropriate emotions.
Jarrod realized his little sister had stopped speaking and was now staring at him, her eyes wide in her pale face, her hands shaking from reliving what she’d done.
“I’m afraid I acted poorly this morning, also.” admitted Jarrod, shaking his head in amazement. “I’ve been so busy thinking about the legal side of Heath being our brother, Audra, well, I’ve forgotten about the man we’ve been fortunate enough to get to know over these past months. I acted like an attorney, protecting the family and not as one brother welcoming another with open arms.”
“Jarrod, what are we going to do? I hurt him terribly and he just responded in anger because I attacked him. I don’t blame Heath, it’s not his fault.” said Audra, the tears starting again.
“Now’s not the time to speak with Heath. His focus right now should be on his wife and not having to deal with two people who were acting out of character. If we had both listened to Mother, none of this would have happened.” stated Jarrod. “In a couple of days, we’ll ride over and try to talk with Heath. I don’t want him to think my last words to him were my true thoughts. This situation is hard on all of us, but worse for him and Mother.”
Thinking on the suggestion, Audra’s face lit up with a hopeful smile and she nodded, “I think you’re right, Jarrod. In a couple of days after things have calmed down, we’ll talk with him and get it all straightened out.”
Hazel eyes watched his two unaware siblings from the bed, their conversation hadn’t been in hushed tones, they had forgotten there was a third person in the room and he was not happy. The cries of sorrow from his sister had been the sound which woken him. He had fought back to awareness at the sounds, the desire to know who hurt her and caused the falling of tears, rushed through him.
The unfolding story, words twisted with nervousness and disappointment at herself didn’t belay the burning deep inside him. His eyes widened and then narrowed at the admission from the man whose legal mind was strong as a bear trap and just as deadly in a court of law. The older brother he’d followed after and looked up to all his life was after all just a man. A man who it seemed was capable of letting himself get lost in the details and not be able to look at the bigger picture.
Laying on the bed, he felt his weakness suddenly disappear at the plan they decided on and he felt his own anger rise up. Daggers shot out of his hazel eyes, his fists clenched around the key he still held and his previously weak voice filled every corner of the room turning his erring siblings to him in disbelief.
“I can’t believe what you two have done. Heath promised me time. Now you’ve made everything worse.” growled Nick, his eyes pinning them to the floor, his red face a sign of his fury. “He was our friend first. He’s ready to run and you two probably just started him off!”
“JUST STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM HIM!”
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Mackenzie walked out onto the porch, glancing downward when the massive dog pushed against her leg and looked up with sad eyes. Smiling at him, she knelt down and vigorously rubbed her hands over his fur, his tail wagging his happiness at the attention.
Moving to sit on the steps, she spent a few minutes talking to the beast and showering him with her attention. Remembering when she first saw the dog, she laughed and shook her head at the idea she thought with her small stature, she could be an appetizer for the large canine.
Atilla lay on the porch beside her, now content to have her just pet the fur on his neck as he lay his head on his paws, closing his eyes. Mackenzie absently petted their friend, her mind wandering through the past three weeks. Sighing, she stared at the rings on her left hand, her husband’s handsome face flashing before her eyes. Each day their love seemed to grow.
The fall weather had set in and the cool air felt good on her face. The house was warm with the fireplace and the oven both emanating warmth. After kissing her once again mobile husband goodbye in the morning, she rushed around the house cleaning it before spending the rest of the time in the kitchen preparing a special dinner and dessert for the evening. Today was their one month anniversary and she wanted to surprise Heath with the special meal and hopefully take his mind off the past weeks.
Patting Atilla one last time, she walked back into the house and took one last look at the table dressed out in its finest. Satisfied all was ready, she walked up the staircase and changed into the white dress with lavender trim. The dress she’d worn on their first date. Sitting in front of the mirror, she brushed her hair and pulled it back with a clip, leaving its length to lay against her back.
The sound of horses returning brought a smile to her lips which changed into a frown after she entered the guest room to peak out the window. The boxes from the attic were stacked in the corner of the room, unopened. She took a deep breath and shook her head. Even though he tried to hide it from her, Mackenzie knew Heath was troubled by the last three weeks. When he brought her home after the fight with Audra, she could see the anger in him after she found him staring out the window later that night. His mind was elsewhere and when she wrapped her arms around him, he’d been startled at her touch.
Turning to face her, he waved off her questions and concern stating he was fine and not to worry. She hadn’t wanted to be another source of anxiety to him, the secret of who his father was already caused such turmoil to him and she decided to allow him to believe he had fooled her.
The days passed and she knew something was bothering him but he would purposely avoid answering her questions. She tried pushing him to open the boxes containing his mother’s possessions but he dug in his heels and resisted. Heated words had been exchanged several times over the boxes and finally she gave up. He was as stubborn as a mule. He was hurting and yet, it seemed, he was petrified to take the step to find out if the boxes held any secrets.
It wasn’t until a few days ago she realized Heath hadn’t been to Stockton the past three weeks. He would send one of the hands in to collect his aunt, pick up the mail, pick up supplies and run any other errand. One evening when he was working on the accounts, she had taken a walk and questioned Jim who confirmed what she suspected.
The blonde was cutting himself off from Stockton and the Barkley family it seemed. Later that evening, as he was sleeping, she leaned on her elbow and studied his face bathed in the moonlight streaming into the window, hoping the answer would leap out at her.
She was no closer today to an answer than any other day before. When she had gone to Stockton yesterday, she hadn’t seen any of the Barkleys. She visited Rachel and the two women spoke about the man they both loved. Neither woman knew what to do but Mackenzie felt immensely better speaking with Rachel. She loved the ranch but sometimes missed having another woman around to talk with.
After leaving Stockton on Sadie, the small horse Heath gentled for her, she felt an overwhelming urge to ride to the Barkley ranch. She’d learned from Rachel that Nick’d finally been allowed to go home earlier in the week. Mackenzie put the idea of riding to the neighboring ranch out of her mind. Heath would be deeply hurt if she went behind his back and she’d never hurt him that way. No, it would all come to a head one day and she hoped when it did, he’d be able to live with the aftermath.
Reaching the bottom of the stairs, she heard the door open and walked into the entry, smiling at the warmth and desire which sprung into his eyes.
“Zie, you look beautiful. You wore this on our first date.” whispered Heath placing a kiss on her lips. “Happy anniversary.”
“Hon, I didn’t think you’d know what day it was.” admitted Mackenzie, cupping his dirty cheek.
“Boy howdy, darlin’, I’d never forget the day we said I do!” chastised Heath with a wink and a grin. “Let me get cleaned up then we can celebrate, okay?”
“Okay, but don’t be too long cowboy.” warned Mackenzie, slapping his backside after he walked by her.
“Hey now, Zie!” protested Heath before running up the stairs with her laughter ringing in his ears.
An hour later, the couple sat together in front of the sofa staring into the fireplace, Mackenzie leaned back against Heath, his arms holding her tight. Placing a kiss on her neck, he nibbled her ear before laying a small box in her hand.
“What’s this?” asked Mackenzie, surprised at the velvet box. “I thought we weren’t going to get each other anything.”
Smiling, Heath gazed into her eyes, “I didn’t promise not to get you anything, Zie. You suggested but I never agreed. Open it!”
“Sometimes Heath you can be so infuriating.” said Mackenzie with a soft smile.
Nuzzling her neck, Heath whispered in her ear, “I have to be to keep up with you, Zie.”
Smacking his arm, she laughed and opened the box, her eyes filling with tears at the gold locket. Taking it from her hands, he opened it and showed her the pictures inside. One of him, the other of her mother and stepfather which she hadn’t known he’d taken from the album. Crying, she let him put the chain around her neck before she thanked him with a lingering kiss.
“Zie, you’re a fountain of tears lately.” smiled Heath wiping her eyes.
“I know, I’m sorry.” agreed Mackenzie, turning and kneeling in front of him, taking his hands in hers. “Heath, I didn’t get you anything.”
“You’re the only present I want, darlin’.” replied Heath, his words husky with emotion, his hands brushing through her hair and undoing the clip holding the locks in place, loving the look of it falling forward and framing her face. “You’re all I need.”
His hands ran through her hair and he kissed her again sending her spiraling from his passion. Her eyes closed at the feel of his hands moving up and down her back, pulling her into his arms, lifting her and carrying her up the stairs. Sitting on the bed with her on his lap, she left kisses on his neck and unbuttoned his shirt slowly, his body quivering from the trail of her lips across his skin. His fingers lifted her dress over her head, his desire building from the feel of her hands on his body. Claiming her lips, he explored her mouth before running his hands up and down her skin. Deliberate slowness of caresses, touches and undressing completely fueled their want for each other. Unable to hold back the need, she welcomed him to join with her, their bodies rapidly moving in time with one another. Her lips called his name and as one they gasped when their passion overflowed leaving them shuddering and holding onto each other, not wanting to loose the moment of oneness and tenderness.
Laying with her head on his shoulder and her hand on his chest, she leaned up and searched his eyes. He smiled into the loving violet eyes, his hands rubbing her back lightly.
“In eight months, you’re gonna be a daddy, Heath.”
Tears sprang into the sapphire eyes and he wrapped her tightly in his arms, kissing her face, his voice thick with happiness. “Thank you, Zie. Thank you.”
Chuckling, she sighed, “It takes two, honey. I’m just glad you’re happy.”
“Happy? Oh, I’m more than happy, Zie.” grinned Heath, his eyes lowered in wonder as he gazed at her stomach and ran his hand over it. “A baby is growing in there. Our baby. It’s amazing, isn’t it?”
Laying on her back, she brushed her fingers through his hair, the look of wonder and love in his eyes taking her breath away. Pulling his face to her, she kissed him and whispered, “I love you, Heath.”
“I love you, Zie.” smiled Heath, his tears of joy springing out of his eyes and he wiped them away. “Hell, I’m a fountain of tears now.”
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Rising early, Nick ate breakfast in the large kitchen, his mind wandering over the past weeks during his confinement. Always a physically strong man, he was never a good patient when he was sequestered to a bed from sickness or injury. His natural enthusiasm for life, his natural state of constant movement made inactivity a form of torture to the dark haired man. His last stint in a bed was also made difficult by his sense of loss from the lack of the blonde’s presence, his thoughts of his father which created anger and sadness in him.
His father was a man who he felt never would have knowingly performed an injustice on his fellow human being. However, it appeared he was no more perfect than any others in this world. He’d had a child out of wedlock with a woman other than his wife. He’d forsaken his wedding vows for time with another woman, be it a night or more, it didn’t matter. What mattered was the secret he kept to himself for over nineteen years before his death reared its ugly head two years too late. Two years after his death, too late for his father to look his other son in the eyes. Too late for his father to look his mother in the eyes, too late for the man to look his other children in their eyes. Too late for an explanation for his actions, too late to soothe the hurt in all of them. The secret was revealed two years too late.
While Nick had lain down the law, so to speak, in forbidding Jarrod and Audra from seeking out Heath, he’d never requested the same of his mother. Smiling, he knew he wouldn’t have dared suggest it to her. When he spoke with her, she relayed her talk with Heath in the waiting room, her words to him. Nick took her hand and smiled into the gray eyes which filled with tears before she blinked them away, squeezing his hand in hers.
His mother was a woman who valued truth and honor. She would accept nothing less than the truth, she deserved nothing less than the truth. He wanted to give her the truth, to give her some semblance of peace with the past which’d been thrust forward and lain at their feet. She would accept the truth and only after its discovery, would she be able to move on into the future.
Placing his plate and cup in the sink, he put on his coat, his hat and left the mansion through the kitchen door. Walking across to the bunkhouse, he opened the door, greeted the crew and made his way to the separate room where his foreman slept. Knocking on the door, he entered closing the door behind him, departing ten minutes later and entering the barn.
Saddling Coco, he felt apprehension rise up within him as he lead his favorite horse out of the barn and mounted, unaware two separate sets of eyes watched him from the mansion. Jarrod and Victoria watched the start of the mission, their minds wondering if Nick would have any success.
Jarrod, himself, secretly requested an investigation into Heath Thomson’s past and a copy of the blonde’s birth certificate. He knew of the blonde’s birthmark and would admit, he had his father’s unique eyes. But his legal mind needed solid proof. Proof which he could hold in his hands was what he sought. Nick and his mother would not have condoned the investigation had he asked their opinion.
After a heated argument between the three siblings, which their mother had broken up they realized Nick’s anger had caused him to tear out his stitches and the wound to bleed again. Only the skillful hands of Dr. Merar had been able to stop the flowing of blood again. The family’d been afraid Nick’s anger had done him in but he pulled through, a testament to the iron will in his younger brother. His brother had been so furious with his and Audra’s behavior, the eldest son and the only daughter bowed to his wishes of no further contact with Heath. They would let Nick have the chance to speak with Heath after he recovered. He’d been able to get a promise of time from the blonde and now, Jarrod, prayed Nick would be able to get their new brother to consider them family.
It had been four weeks since the day of Heath and Mackenzie’s wedding when Nick crossed onto the Thomson ranch. He loved riding across the open range, he loved the outdoors, he loved even the grunge work, hell, he loved everything which came with being a rancher. This was the life he’d been born into just like Jarrod had been born into the legal profession and Gene the world of medicine. He’d never doubted his place on the ranch and he wondered how different things would’ve been if Heath had grown up with him, by his side. Shaking his head clear of the thoughts of what might have been, he took a deep breath after he topped the hill and looked down on the ranch before him.
He felt pride rising up as he took in the sprawling ranch, the improvements made under the direction of his brother, the careful planning, the erecting of solid buildings. Heath worked hard to obtain his dream and he deserved it as much as anyone.
Nudging Coco, Nick rode into the empty yard and pulled up in front of the house where he was greeted with growling as he dismounted until the dog caught his scent and came bounding over. Patting the mound of fur, Nick smiled when he recalled the last time he’d been in this yard, the day before the wedding. Sighing, he thought it seemed like a lifetime ago and climbed the porch stairs. Knocking on the door, he took off his hat and grinned at Mackenzie.
“Nick!” exclaimed Mackenzie happily. “Come in!”
Holding the door open, she stepped back and allowed the large man to enter, his stature filling up the entry way. Putting his hat on one of the hooks, he smiled at her offer of coffee.
“Is Heath here, Mac?” asked Nick using the familiar nickname she suggested he used.
Shaking her head, she set the cup in front of him and smiled, “No, he’s out with Matt fencing in an alkali water hole by the mountains. How are you feeling?”
“Much better.” stated Nick with a sigh. “I was hoping to speak with him.”
Studying the hazel eyes, Mackenzie patted his hand and nodded, “You two need each other, Nick. Heath’s just as lost as you but he won’t admit it.”
Frowning, he took a sip of his coffee and smiled slightly, “I guess he’s as stubborn as me. One way to tell we’re brothers, I reckon.”
Laughing, Mackenzie stood up and turned, holding onto the table from a bout of nausea, her face paling and she felt two sturdy hands holding her up.
“Mac, you okay?” stammered Nick, concerned at the pale face and her closed eyes.
Taking several deep breaths, she nodded and smiled, “I’m alright, it’s just, well, it’s only morning sickness.”
“Morning sickness!” shouted Nick, his eyes sparkling with happiness, his smile lighting up his face. “That’s wonderful, Mac. I’m happy for you two. I’m gonna be an UNCLE!”
Patting his hand, Mackenzie sat back in the chair, her eyes filling with tears before she wiped them away. “Sorry, Nick. The baby is making me cry all the time.”
Eagerness spread through Nick at the news, his heart pounding fiercely with the desire to see the expectant father and he stood up. “I gotta see Heath! I’m so happy for him, I gotta tell him.”
Mackenzie watched the excitement in Nick and smiled at his giddiness. He took three steps to the door and stopped suddenly, his shoulders hunching and he turned slowly.
“Mac, he’s not gonna be happy to see me, is he?” worried Nick at the sudden feeling of reality rushing him.
Shaking her head, she felt the tears come and couldn’t stop them, her words tumbled out. “No, he’s won’t be, Nick. He’s talking of selling the ranch. He’s deeply hurt about something and it’s more than just finding out about his father. He won’t talk to me and I can’t help him. I tried but we end up fighting about it. I love him, Nick and I’ll go wherever he wants but running to avoid life is not the answer!”
Crossing back to the table after the tears flowed continuously, Nick grabbed a towel for her to dry her eyes and squeezed her hand. “Heath was my friend first, Mac. Having him as my brother is just icing on the cake. I’m gonna ride out and I’m not leaving til he talks or shouts at me.”
“I’m sorry, Nick. He’s such a gentle caring person. I can’t stand him to be hurting so much.” sighed Mackenzie. “I know he cares for you, Nick. I think he’s just confused and doesn’t know what to do.”
Spending ten more minutes with his sister-in-law, Nick climbed on Coco and rode towards the waterhole. Thinking of Mackenzie, he smiled and knew how lucky a man his brother was when he’d won her heart.
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Heath and Matt worked in the cool weather, enclosing the waterhole to prevent any of the animals from drinking from it. Heath enjoyed the quiet man’s company and he knew his skills were top notch. Jim and Heath agreed to give more of the foreman duties to the younger man in the wintertime due to Jim’s arthritis and inability to spend the days in the cold.
Matt saw the rider approaching and his eyes widened with surprise before a small smile lifted the corner of his mouth. He recognized the formidable and strong Nick Barkley riding towards them. He knew the Thomson ranch would be lit up with the fireworks when the two men came together. Clearing his throat, he nailed in the board and stood up, looking into his boss’ eyes.
“Boss, rider coming.”
Turning, Heath stiffened and clenched his hands at Nick riding towards them. Taking a breath, he crossed his arms over his chest and waited til Nick reached them and growled.
“Get off my land, Barkley.”
Matt Duer had always heard Nick Barkley was an impatient man. A man who wanted others to jump when he spoke, a man who strode through the world as if he owned every inch of it. Never having experienced working with the man himself, Matt never took idle gossip for gospel truth, he never relied on wagging tongues to gauge a person. Right here in front of him was Nick Barkley and his reaction to the growled command of his boss left Matt biting his lip to keep his chuckle of respect from escaping.
Putting his arm on his saddlehorn, Nick leaned forward and pushed his hat back onto his forehead, his eyes twinkling as he greeted the blonde, “Good morning to you too, brother Heath.”
Heath’s arms dropped to his side and red crept up his neck. Turning to Matt, he spoke through clenched teeth, “I’ll see you back at the house, Matt. Good work today.”
“Sure, boss.” stated Matt gathering the tools and nodding to the men eyeing each other before climbing on his horse. Riding away, he topped a small hill and rode down the side of it before dismounting, tying his horse to a bush and sneaking up the hill, his eyes intently watching the scene he’d left. Part of him did it out of curiousity, another part did it to ensure neither men let anger get the best of them and do something they’d regret.
Heath waited til Matt left before glaring at the dark haired man on his horse, his insides boiling from the blaise attitude and the smirk on his face. He took a breath and put his hands on his hips.
“Nice to see you up and riding again, now turn around and leave!” stated Heath firmly, turning and making his way to Charger.
Nick nudged Coco putting the horse in the blonde’s path, stopping his steps to the stallion, infuriating the man. Scowling upwards into the cool hazel eyes, Heath clenched his jaw and stepped sideways, going around the horse. With a small movement of his wrist, the chocolate colored horse again cut off Heath’s escape.
“DAMMIT, BARKLEY! ARE YOU HAVING FUN? GET OFF MY LAND!” screamed Heath furiously, his words reaching the ears of Matt who shook his head and waited without breathing for the next move.
Nick simply sat his saddle waiting patiently for the irate blonde to move again. When it happened and Coco moved, Heath jumped back and reached up, his hands grabbing hold of the larger man, pulling him from the saddle to land in the meadow grass. Swatting Coco on the backside with his hat, Heath startled the horse who ran from the area with stirrups flapping.
“HEY!” protested Nick climbing up from the ground, his surprise at the quickness of his brother’s movement turning to anger at his retreating horse. “Guess we have to ride double now, brother.”
“Ya’ start walkin’, ya might make it back in time for dinner.” snarled Heath, his turn away stopped by a hand clamping down on his left arm. Moving, Heath felled the larger man with a right hook and stood over him.
“WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME? JUST LEAVE!” shouted Heath, his arms waving in the air, his pent up frustration clear for the hazel eyes to see.
“I want you to say we’re brothers and you’re not leaving.” stated Nick calmly, climbing to his feet, rubbing his bruised jaw.
Heath shook his head and looked up at the sky, his body shaking with anger. “You sure got some nerve, Barkley. Just get your lying, forked tongued body off MY LAND!”
“WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?” shouted Nick, standing nose to nose with the blonde. “I HAVEN’T LIED TO YOU! YOU BETTER EXPLAIN THAT REMARK, BOY!”
Pushing Nick back, Heath’s eyes simmered with rage and his words sent the dark haired man over the edge. “YOUR DADDY TAUGHT YOU THE FINE ART OF LYING, DIDN’T HE BARKLEY?”
Grabbing the blonde by the shirt, Nick hauled him towards him, his eyes flashing, “I don’t know what you got stuck in your craw but we’re gonna take care of it right now.”
Matt shook his head when the fists started flying and the two men laid into each other, neither getting an upper hand until a lunge into Heath’s body from Nick sent the blonde flying backwards into the newly erected fence. Matt winced as he watched his hard work break in two and Nick sat on top of his boss picking him up by the shirt.
The dazed look in the sapphire eyes dissipated Nick’s anger, he gently lowered Heath to the ground and Nick quickly knelt by his side, examining him. Nervously, Matt watched and let out a breath when Nick helped the blonde to a sitting position, his hand on Heath’s shoulder.
“Jesus, Heath. I’m sorry!” apologized Nick, his eyes filled with sorrow at the pain they’d inflected on each other. “You okay?”
The back of his head hitting the fence before it collapsed left Heath stunned for a minute, the world had gone fuzzy before his eyes and the deep frantic voice speaking to him seemed to be muffled behind a cloth. Blinking his eyes, he pushed Nick away, his voice quivering as he moved to sit on his knees.
“Why are you here? I heard you, what you said. Why are you doing this?” stammered Heath, his eyes clouded with confusion and pain, the words twisting Nick’s heart.
Holding the blonde by the shoulders, Nick stared into the perplexed sapphire eyes and urged him to continue, “What, Heath? What do you think I said?”
“I don’t think! I know! You and all your talk!” snarled Heath trying to get out of the firm hold, his energy quickly fading from the fight.
“TELL ME!” demanded Nick shaking him slightly, his voice changing to a lower tone of pleading, “Please, Heath, tell me.”
Shaking his head, Heath felt his anguish rising back up, his words poured out taking Nick by surprise, filling him with sorrow and regret.
“I heard ya’ shouting to stay the hell away from me. Ya’ said ya’d take care of the situation when ya’ got better.” said Heath, his body slumping down in weakness, his soul laid bare from the inner wounds. “Ya’ told me once it didn’t matter my being a bastard, but you lied, Barkley. It does matter and I want you to leave. Same father or not, I’m not gonna let you tear me apart like this.”
Tears formed in the hazel eyes and Nick cupped the cheek of his brother, his head shaking in disbelief, “I did say that but it wasn’t meant how you heard it. I’d found out how Jarrod and Audra acted towards you the morning when Mac fainted. I’d just found out what they’d said and I was angry at them. NOT YOU, HEATH! THEM! You promised me time and I was afraid they had messed everything up and were gonna send you running. I was telling them to stay away not cause of your birth but cause of them. God, I’m sorry, Heath! You thought that all these weeks?”
Heath lowered his eyes, his forehead wrinkling up in pain and he reached his hand upward to latch onto a strong forearm when a dizzy spell hit him. Sapphire eyes relayed understanding of his explanation and he sighed, “Friends was one thing, being brothers is something else. I don’t know if I can do it, Nick.”
Nick nodded in agreement, “Give me a chance, Heath. It’s not gonna be easy but I guarantee it’ll be worth it. Give us a fair shake at being a family.”
“Nick, I…” paused Heath taking a shaky breath.
“What?” whispered Nick, his stomach churning nervously at the pause in the words.
“I think…I’m gonna be sick.” gasped Heath turning quickly, heaving up his breakfast while Nick held him by the arms, the ground wavering in his vision.
Nick’s eyes widened at the amount of blood on the back of Heath’s head and he groaned, “Mac’s gonna be upset with us.”
Wiping his face, Heath winced when Nick examined the gash on his head before wrapping a cloth around it. “Nick, I can’t get Zie upset about something else. I’ve upset her enough these past weeks and it’s not good for her cause she’s, well, she’s pregnant.”
Slowly turning Heath around, Nick smiled widely and pulled the blonde into his arms, “I know, little brother. Congratulations.”
‘Little brother’. The words lifted the darkness from his heart, the strong arms holding him sent away the loss he’d been feeling and Heath patted the large back.
“It’s your lucky day, Barkley. You get a chance to ride the Red Ghost.” said Heath before meeting the hazel eyes and whispering, “Brother.”
Hazel eyes softened with emotion at the whispered word and he smiled before helping Heath onto Charger, lifting the blonde into the saddle and climbing up behind him. Heath nudged the stallion forward riding back to his home with his brother.
....Continued
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