| [The cheers have
just died down, until special guest ring announcer Michael Buffer steps up with the
microphone, clears his throat, and begins speaking.] Michael Buffer: And now... THE MAIN EVENT! [The crowd _explodes_ at Buffer's statement, as he looks back and forth over Madison Square Garden.] MB: Then... ARE YOU READY? [The fans pop loudly.] MB: I said, ARRRE YOU RRRRREADY? [The place EXPLODES with cheers and "IWL" chants.] MB: Wrrrresting fans... for the thousands in attendance and the millions watching at home on live pay-per-view... LLLLLLLLLET'S GET READY TO RRRRRRRRRUMBLLLLLLLLE! [The "IWL!" chants are drowned out by the chords of an IWL icon's music, and Kevin Sash appears in the runway. There are multiple reactions, but for the most part, they're all cheers.] MB: The special guest commentator... KEVVVVVIN SAAAASSHH! [The big man makes his way to the ringside commentary table, sits down, and takes a seat.] Kevin Sash: Good to be here, Nick, Lance... and you, you little piece of trash, shut up. [Axel closes his mouth, which was open from the smartass comment destined to come out. At that point, the tunes of Creed's "Higher" hit the speakers, and one challenger to the vacant World Title steps into view.] MB: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN... INTRODUCING FIRST, A FORMER IWEF INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION AND A FORMER ICWA WORLD TELEVISION CHAMPION... HE IS THE MASTER OF THE DEATH FROM ABOVE AND WEIGHS IN AT TWO HUNDRED AND EIGHTY SEVEN POUNDS... JEFFFFFF GAAAAUDET! [The battered Gaudet gets a huge ovation, and even an ICWA-like "Gaudet got it" chant. He smiles and raises a hand in the air, as if to signal victory. His World Tag Team Title lies over his shoulder.] NR: Gaudet fought hard tonight, and whether or not he wins the IWL World Heavyweight Title doesn't mean a thing to his bright future here. MB: AND HIS OPPONENT... [For a seventh time, "More Human Than Human" by White Zombie hits the speakers, and the fans rise to their feet and explode in cheers for Dan Slate. The determined ring warrior appears in the entranceway, staring at his much larger opponent. Still, he shows no fear and storms down the aisle as Michael Buffer calls his statistics.] MB: HAILING FROM ATLANTA, GEORGIA... HE IS A FORMER IWL WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT AND WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPION... HE IS THE MASTER OF THE DROP BOMB AND WEIGHS IN AT TWO HUNDRED AND SIXTY FIVE POUNDS... DAAAAAN SLAAAATE! [Slate slides into the ring and looks straight up at Gaudet, not even intimidated. Referee Hunter displays the IWL World Heavyweight Title to both men, then into the air. He backs away, hands the belt to the timekeeper, and calls for the bell. ***DING DING DING***] NR: It's come down to this! The moment everyone's been waiting for! Slate... Gaudet... the IWL World Title is ON THE LINE! LT: Both these men are fan favorites, both take no prisoners in the ring. KS: I'm pulling for Slate. LT: Why's that? KS: No "newbie" as one can put it, deserves the IWL World Title. NR: And the match is underway! Jeff Gaudet began it with hard right hands, and he backs Slate into the ropes... Irish whip by Gaudet, reversal by Slate, Slate drops down, Gaudet returns and responds with a shoulderblock, then off the ropes, Slate drops down, on Gaudet's return Slate with the dropkick that sends him to the ropes and leaves him resting on them! LT: Referee Hunter is being lenient, may I remind you, simply because we need a new IWL Champion tonight! And Slate charges Gaudet, clotheslines both himself and Gaudet over, and the battle has officially spilled to the outside! KS: Is there a no-disqualification rule? NR: Well, we can't have a champion on a DQ decision. KS: Right... LT: Slate hammering on Gaudet with some hard fists, he backs him into the guardrail and launches him for the steps... GAUDET REVERSES! [CLANG!] SLATE WENT SHOULDER-FIRST INTO THE STEEL STEPS! NR: These men may have nothing left from their tournament matches, and both have injured portions of their body to worry about! At least, Gaudet can worry... Slate can take you apart like a kid's Lego set! AF: Who you callin' a kid? LT: What? AF: Oh, ahh... nothing. NR: Gaudet's got Slate in a side headlock... running bulldog on the concrete by Gaudet! Slate's now got head trauma to deal with! LT: And Gaudet rolls Slate back into the ring, and covers! ONE! TWO!! Kick out! NR: And Gaudet looks surprised himself! He picks Slate up and Irish whips him, but holds on... knee to the gut! Off the other ropes, knee to the gut! Slate staggers into the center of the ring... GAUDET WITH A DRAGON SUPLEX INTO A CHOKESLAM! LT: That would be all right there if Gaudet was a healthy man, but he couldn't get Slate too high up for the move! Gaudet shakes his head and pulls Slate up, scoop slam... Slate down Gaudet's back and a bridging German suplex! ONE! TWO!! THRE- kick out! NR: I can't believe that! Gaudet not only had his own weight holding him down, but Slate's arms as well! LT: And he still kicked out, that shows a desire to win! KS: What's Gaudet done in the IWL, anyway? Did he beat Sgt. X? LT: No... KS: What about Adam Azure or Angel? NR: Neither. KS: Why is he in line for a title shot? AF: Duhh... he beat three other men here tonight and even won the World Tag Team Championsh-- HOLY F(bleep)CK! [All four men in the commentary booth scatter as Jeff Gaudet smashes into the table from Slate's back bodydrop to the outside.] LT: Am I on? Nick, you hear me? NR: Hear ya, we're on... Axel? AF: Yeah... jeez! You _see_ that? KS: Have you guys ever thought about doing commentary behind a Plexiglass wall? LT: Jeff Gaudet is lying here, he's barely moving, and Slate comes down to keep the offense up! NR: This is insane! Gaudet's been beaten all to Hell tonight and now he just went through our damn table! LT: Slate stomps at the injured ribs of Jeff Gaudet even more, before hauling him into the ring and going for the cover! ONE! TWO!! [An absolute hush falls over the Madison Square Garden crowd.] AF: HOW THE F(bleep)CK DID HE KICK OUT?! LT: Axel... watch what you say. AF: Watch what you _eat_, porky. NR: Jeff's got nothing left! He's running on instinct, will, or fumes, take your pick! AF: Lance is running on fumes... you stink! LT: Oh, shut up. NR: Slate is looking to finish Gaudet off, he whips him to the ropes for the spinebuster... Gaudet boots Slate in the face! Dan's clutching his head, Jeff Gaudet tucks his head between his legs, POWERBOMB! He holds on, DOUBLE POWERBOMB! GAUDET'S HOLDING ON TO THE ROPES TO KEEP STEADY! KS: Be right back... NR: What's he doing...? Oh, he just grabbed Gaudet's leg! LT: The referee is occupied! SASH DELIVERS THE SASH BOMB TO GAUDET ON THE CONCRETE! HE ROLLS HIM BACK IN FOR SLATE! SLATE MAKES THE HALF-DAZED COVER! ONE! TWO! THREE!!! DAN SLATE IS THE IWL WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION, AGAIN! ALL THANKS TO SASH! ["More Human Than Human" is heard playing over the speakers, and Kevin Sash aids Dan Slate to his feet, handing the title over to him. The music ends the PPV and does so with many cheers, or boos, but overall... confusion.] LT: Fans, we're out of time, and for Nick Roberts and Axel Fury, I'm Lance Thompson, good night! |
