9/30/2003

10:29 PM

Logfile from Chase.

 

6 Train - East Side Line

For the past five years, the East Side Line has been undergoing some major rennovations. Many of the stations are now better lit with new tiling and sometimes decorative artwork. The trains themselves come in three varieties: the old redline, the old silverline and the brand new silverline. The staions are as follows:

67th Street - Hunter College {Central Park} (farthest north)

57th Street - Lexington Avenue {Midtown Manhattan}

42nd Street - 5th Avenue {NY Public Library}

34th Street - 6th Avenue {Fashion District}

Houston Street - East Village {The Village}

Canal Street - Lower Manhattan {Chinatown} (farthest south)

Sayuri is here.

Obvious exits:

67th St.   57th St.   42nd St.   34th St.   Houston St.   Canal St.

 

It's hard to pretend that life is normal when one's world has crumbled around them so easily, but that's exactly what Sayuri's attempting to do.  She smiles at her friends as they get on one car while she waits for her train, but as soon as they're out of sight, her sunny facade falls to be replaced by a melancholy mien.  The rush-hour crowd suddenly feels too oppressive and she's pushing her way upwards towards the surface blindly, unable to maintain the lie around people who don't matter.  She's not used to this hurt, this feeling of vulnerability, and she has no way of coping.  She just wants to curl up until it goes away.  Until her heart heals and hardens.  Right now everything is just too raw.

 

No matter that Chase is still nursing a stab wound to his shoulder and the other assorted this and that that lends to him being far less than a hundred percent, the boy got out today and started walking the streets in search of someone. In a city of this size, those skillz of his help immensely. And so, here he finally is weaving through the crowd to finally spot Sayuri. He waits for a moment, watching her, and then waiting as she comes closer, only to stand in her path. "Sayuri?"

 

That voice... Sayuri freezes as her gaze drifts upwards, eyes widening as she meets Chase's gaze.  And then she's turning away, taking a deep breath before she trusts herself to speak.  "Tomi-chan," she returns his greeting with a husky whisper.  She forces a false smile, though  her eyes don't quite connect with his again, as she starts to babble.  "How are you?  Imagine running into you here, of all places."  She thought that she'd get more time to heal before she had to face him again, but pride won't let her look weak in front of him anymore.  Or at least that's what she's telling herself repeatedly, but then it just becomes too much as she just needs to get away.  "Oh my, look at the time.  Gomen ne, Tomi-chan, but I'm... I'm late."  Please ignore the way her voice cracks on those last two words.

 

Chase watches her cautiously, resting on the balls of his feet just incase he needs to dart after her or something along that mien. No frowns of any kind, he simply watches her, eyes the only things to reveal just how much concern is there. "I'm not doing to good, actually. Could be better..." He draws in a slow breath, sighing, "Please don't leave? I've spent half the day trying to track you down, and I... really need to talk to you. Please?"

 

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," Sayuri returns automatically, not sure what to make of his words.  The general rush of people coming and going fade into the background, unnoticed because they don't matter anymore.  Only Chase does, and yet past habits have her closing herself off, trying not to let him get a chance to hurt her again.  His pleading throws her plans out the window, though, as she raises her eyes to blink confusedly at him, stilling.  "You've been trying to find me?  Why," she asks on a whisper, eyes bright.  "I... I think you made yourself perfectly clear the other night."

 

"I think I pretty much well mad an ass out of myself the other night," Chase mutters, still watching her rather carefully. "As a matter of fact, I know that I did. And I think that I messed up big time. I thought that I was doing one thing to protect you, when in fact I was doing something else." His gaze doesn't drop or flicker to anyone else because he is far, far too intent upon Sayuri. "Will you listen to me?"

 

Sayuri's heart is pounding wildly in her chest, it's frantic beating reminding the girl that she's still alive.  That she's still in love with the seishi, no matter how much she tries to deny it.  "I don't need protecting," she murmurs softly, unable to drop her gaze away, his intensity effectively trapping her.  But she does need him.  Slowly she nods her head in acquiesce, "Hai, Tomi-chan."  She steps back, adding, "But not here.  It's too public."  She holds a hand out towards him, a tentative movement, as she asks, "Shall we take a little walk?"

 

For a brief moment there, a faint smirk actually crosses Chase's features in reaction to her comment on protecting. "If you are going to be hanging around me, you'll have to get used to me doing that." He nods his head though, reaching a hand over to take her hand in his, "No, definitely not here. You pick the place and I'll go with you." Deliberately letting her choose a place that she would probably be more comfortable at.

 

Washington Square

The buildings are of average height in this part of the city and the streets are narrow and filled to overflowing. But this particular area boasts of one open space. Washington Square Park covers approximately four city blocks with greenery and benches, and a place in the village to sit and contemplate nature. Several points of interest can be found here. In the northwest corner of the park is an elm tree that legend proports was once a hanging tree, which gives it its current nickname, "Hangman's Elm." The tall marble archway that heralds this part of town stands tall and proud, made in commemoration of the centenntial Washington's Inauguration, its design based on the Arc de Triomphe in Paris.

Surrounding the park are a variety of residential buildings, as well as dorms and classroom buildings of the sprawling New York University. More often than not, the relatively residential area is filled with students, ranging from the cleancut law school kids, to the magenta-haired liberal arts rebels.

Sayuri is here.

Obvious exits:

E. Houston St. (EA)   W. 4th St. (WE)   NY University

 

Leading the way out of the station, Sayuri doesn't really have any place specific in mind, in fact she's not thinking all that well because of the simple contact of her hand in Chase's.  Washington Square is close and she begins to make her way in that direction, not saying anything.  She'd just like to enjoy the feeling of having the seishi close again.  Only once she settles on a free park bench does she open her mouth, and it's to note, "Gomen nasai, Tomi-chan, demo if you're going to constantly be pushing me away under some asinine idea of protecting me, then I... I think we should make a clean break of things.  I can't keep doing this."  She looks up at the Genbu, all of her pent-up emotions swimming in the mahogany depths of her eyes.  "It hurts too much."

 

Chase follows along with her, willingly coming along as he watches her more than their surroundings. Once seated, he instead moves to straddle the bench, facing her. "That's what I thought that I was doing. I didn't want you to... I didn't want you to say those things. About dying if I did. I couldn't stand it if you did, and I still don't like it. In fact, I hate it. It scares the shit out of me." He draws in a slow breath before continuing, "You aren't the first person to say something like that to me. In fact, Sayuri... someone even died once because of me. And that is why is scared me so much."

 

"I can't help it, Tomi-chan," Sayuri says once again, looking down at the worn wood as she adds.  "I can't help the way that I feel.  Do  you think that I'd say that to just anyone?  No one's ever gotten as close to me as you have.  Not otousan, not oniisan.  No one.  I didn't want to lose you, lose what we hav- had."  She shakes her head, tears brimming silently forward as she whispers wryly, "You think it doesn't scare me as well?  To know that you're that important to me?  That all you have the power to crush me so easily?"  She keeps her gaze on the bench as he explains further, her voice emotionless as she says, "Then I'm sorry, Tomi-chan.  I... I didn't know, but even if I did, it wouldn't change anything."

 

Chase sighs, leaning forward slightly as he watches her. "I know. I know. I figured that out. You scared me so much I was only thinking about trying to keep you from doing that 'cause I felt for sure that it would happen. And that is the last thing I want for you. But I hurt you too, and I didn't mean to. I.. I shouldn't have done that to you." Right arm lifts, fingers moving over as if to try to draw his fingers through her hair. "I'm sorry. And I'll do anything to make it better for you."

 

Unbidden, the tears starts to stream down Sayuri's cheeks as she still can't bring her gaze back up to the seishi.  "You broke my heart," she accuses in a whispered voice, her words hitching at the end.  "I don't know if I can trust you with it again, Tomi-chan."  Forget that he already has it, and always will.

 

Chase ducks his head a little with her words, obviously ashamed with himself. He takes a shaky breath, and then leans forward as if to lean his forehead against her's. "I know I did. I know. And I can't begin to apologize for doing that." Guilt is once more trickling into his voice. "Please give me another chance? I want to try to fix it?"

 

Sayuri lets out a shuddering breath as Chase's smooth skin touches hers as he leans his forehead against her own.  "I don't know," she whispers honestly, the uncertainty clear in her voice.  "I can't keep this up, no matter how much I love you.  And I do love you, Tomi-chan, demo..."  Their relationship had started out so promising, so fun, but lately things have been getting darker.  More intense.  And two times out of three, Sayuri ended up getting smooshed.  Oh, she did a little smooshing herself back, something that she's not proud of.  It just seems that they do nothing but hurt each other lately.  She closes her eyes as everything suddenly becomes crystal clear.  Even though he hurts her, she knows that she'd be worse off without him.  Isn't that the reason that they'd fought last time.  "One more chance, Tomi-chan," she lifts her damp lashes to stare towards the Genbu, her features suddenly all too serious.  "I'll give us one more chance."  One more chance for her to mend her bridges and let him mend his.  One more chance at happiness.

 

Chase reaches a hand between them, gently brushing his thumb over one of her cheeks and then the other to try to cast away the tears upon them. "I don't want to make this tough on you. The gods know I don't. But it will be." He leans his head back a little so that he can look at her more clearly too. "Thank you. Thank you." And you can tell that he means it, the emotion in his voice hardly restrained. He starts to lean towards her once again, whispering, "I love you," before trying to press his lips to hers with a light kiss.

 

Eep, don't tell Sayuri things like that, Chase.  She's looking for simplicity, not assurances of more trouble.  But before she can focus on what he's said, he's leaning into her and kissing her and there's nothing she can do but kiss him back.  Wrapping her arms around his neck, she attempts to increase the pressure, attempts to take control of the kiss.  He hadn't kissed her since that terrible incident with Malachai, and she missed it, missed the physical closeness.  No matter how ill-suited they are otherwise, physically they meld together easily.  And she needs that confirmation that he still needs her, still wants her.  Just like she still needs him, still wants him.

 

Chase really doesn't give a damn about the shoulder or anything else right now. It can twinge away, and he won't care. Good arm slips around her, pulling her closer even as she does the same to him. A few more 'love you's are murmurs against her lips as she controls their kiss. He is thanking his lucky stars, literally, that things turned out the way they have, worried half the day as he was looking for her that it would all be for nothing.