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Somewhere across town, the Doctor sat enjoying a hot cup of tea. The tea-bar was just as run-down and squalid as the bar where he’d left Nick and Alf, but marginally more to his tastes. Soft space jazz filtered through worn speakers, and an elderly bartender wiped down the tables behind him. The Doctor’s mind was pre-occupied with his very reason for coming to the dilapidated hole in space they called Gidi. What unsettled him most was not how an entire planet had been reduced to space debris, but why. Vrij was of no military significance, of no significance at all. Neither did it harbour any valuable mineral wealth that the Outer Galaxies would want to steal or destroy for unscrupulous political gain. There was nothing special about it at all, and yet someone or something, had seen fit to blow it out of the cosmos. Most intriguing, thought the Doctor as he took another sip of his tea. There was just a chance that as Gidi was the next planet in the system, that someone here might have some idea about its disappearance. Before the scuffed china had touched his lips, however, it was sent spinning through the air to smash against the wall, and his face was suddenly stinging from a vicious slap. ‘You cheating, no-good, double-crossing, useless, lazy, space bum!’ said a voice, the like of which had only previously haunted his darkest nightmares. ‘Unhand me madam!’ the Doctor boomed, standing up to face the surprisingly little middle-aged woman, with dyed red hair that stood facing him with her hands on her hips. ‘Don’t you touch me!’ she threatened. ‘It’s taken me twelve years to track you down! And here you are, drinking tea on the planet Gidi, like butter wouldn’t melt! My old Mum told me about men like you, Barry!’ ‘My dear good woman,’ the Doctor began calmly. ‘For one thing, my name is not Barry! And for another, I’ve only just arrived on this interminable planet!’ ‘Oh so it’s interminable now is it!’ stormed the woman, raising her handbag and bringing it down once more on his head. ‘Don’t you baffle me with your fancy speak you miserable excuse for a man!’ It felt like Alf had walked for miles, and the source of the strange chanting did not seem to be getting any nearer. Bugger it, she thought. What has this got to do with a vanishing planet anyway? She walked a few yards further, and was just thinking about how attractive the warmth of the “Bird of Pride” club suddenly seemed, when she stumbled on something at her feet. She looked down and cursed. ‘Oh shit. A body. Now we’re really in trouble.’ The man had been dead some time, and his body was slashed, almost from throat to stomach. There was no blood, however, she noticed. Could be vampires again, but that would be too much of a coincidence. ‘How very odd,’ she murmured, somehow not being able to take her eyes off the poor, wretched corpse before her. The man was in his late fifties, respectably dressed almost as if for a black-tie party. Poor bastard. She bent down to check in his pockets for identification, and it was then that she heard the crunch of a footstep behind her. She whirled round, but it was too late. Everything suddenly went black. Nick and Cy laughed together as they made their way out of town. Nick immediately felt himself relaxed in the company of the innocent yet somewhat intriguing guy with the dark blue, playful eyes. ‘So will your Nan be home?’ Nick asked. Cy grinned. ‘Not for hours,’ he replied. ‘She’ll be working ’til late. Here we are. Home.’ They had reached an unusually grand-looking mansion, far from the distant lights of the town. It was shrouded in darkness, save for a single light emanating from a grill in the ground. ‘Looks like someone’s burning the candle,’ Nick observed. ‘I thought it was just you and your Nan.’ ‘Nan insists we leave a light on.’ Cy laughed, placing his hand over Nick’s. He rummaged in the pocket of his leather trousers and drew out a key. Opening the door, he stepped aside and gestured for Nick to go in first. ‘Age before beauty.’ Nick smiled coyly. ‘Coffee?’ Nick nodded. ‘No sugar for me, ta.’ ‘I should have guessed,’ said Cy playfully, ‘you’re sweet enough already babe!’ He switched on a battered electric kettle, and swung a leg over a wooden chair in the stone-floored kitchen. Nick looked around, mildly impressed. It was reasonably tidy, although a weathered handbag lay on the central table, its contents seemingly emptied it in a hurry. A curious pile of junk. Other than the lipstick and knitting needles it could have been the contents of the Doctor’s pockets, such was the odd assortment of strange items scattered around. While he was busy looking round, Cy surreptitiously took a small plastic cylinder from his pocket, and slipped two chalky tablets into the cup he had set out for Nick’s coffee. As the kettle boiled, he poured water into the two mugs and smiled to himself. ‘So,’ said Cy, giving Nick his coffee. ‘What do we do now then?’ ‘So you see,’ explained the Doctor. ‘I’ve never even been to the planet Bros! Let alone married you and involved my self in a bank robbery.’ ‘Oh I’m ever so sorry, Doctor.’ The little woman smiled sheepishly. ‘It’s just you look ever so like him… Barry, that is. My ex-husband Barry. No good piece of filth that he was.’ ‘It’s not a problem.’ The Doctor smiled warmly. ‘I’d like to say it happens all the time but in all my travels through time and space this is the very first time I’ve ever been mistaken for someone called Barry.’ ‘Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?’ she asked. ‘Well for one thing,’ the Doctor began, ‘you could tell me your name. And for another, I was really looking forward to the cup of tea I was about to enjoy.’ ‘I’m Vera,’ she said. ‘And I’m sorry about your cup of tea, Doctor. You could always come back to mine. There’s some battenburg cake in the larder as well.’ ‘Ah well,’ the Doctor murmured, before fixing Vera with a shining smile. ‘I never could refuse a woman with battenburg to share.’ ‘Well that settles it then.’ Vera took his hand and led him out the teashop.
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