Title: Just Between Me And Me
Author: kbk
Disclaimer: Stargate: SG-1 = not mine. Characters of such = not mine. Various tat = mine.
Rating: R for language
Notes: This won't make sense if you haven't seen the specific episode. Gist of it is: Loki, an Asgard, replaces Jack with a clone who has all memories etc, but due to stuff, the clone has only been aged to physically about fifteen instead of forty-sth. And at the end mini-Jack goes off to high school, which we all thought was sick and wrong.
Notes: Later on mini-Jack comes back, so this has been Jossed, but oh well.
Notes: 1000 words exactly, because I felt like it.

Hey. You awake now? Good.

I came to tell you I'm off. Going to work with Maybourne and associated. Don't worry, it's strictly skills-only. I'm not about to tell them anything important.

I know what you're wondering. Why work with him? Yeah, he's a fuckhead, but... He talked to me like I was me, Jack. Me. Jack. You all forgot I'm not a kid. Did you honestly think high school would keep me occupied? What, you actually believed I'd go around lusting after fifteen-year-old girls? Last time I did that was twenty-three years ago, and I didn't know how old she was. For god's sake, they're younger than my son would be! And the vapid looks on their faces if I mention anything from more than ten years ago... They don't remember the Gulf War! I fought in that! I have nightmares from that! How the fuck would I explain that to anyone?

I have twenty-five years of experience behind an innocent young face, and you can't tell me you don't know what an asset that is. You think the Air Force are funding me out of the goodness of their hearts? Hell no! They expect me to sign straight back up as soon as I graduate. Go through Basic Training again for appearances - because I enjoyed it so much the first time, bastards - and then out on black ops like I never stopped. Without the dicky knees and so forth.

You look surprised. You honestly didn't think about it, did you? You just put me out of your mind. Shoved me in a corner with all the rest of the stuff you didn't want to think about. I didn't have that option. I wake up every day with a teenage body and a middle-aged mind. Yeah, yeah, I know, you're in the prime of life - save it for someone who hasn't been there for the hangovers.

Hey, the gag isn't too tight, is it? Sometimes I over-compensate, still. Let me see. Oh, for... Jack. I. Know. All. That. You. Know. Am I going to have to knock it into that thick skull of yours? I know all the escape tricks, and I know how to counteract them all, so all you're doing is hurting yourself. Suppose that's what I'm good at though.

God, this is schizophrenic. And get that look off your face, you of all people shouldn't be surprised when I use big words.

Speaking of big words, you think I could call Daniel? 'Cause, y'know, I miss him. I miss all of them. That really wasn't fair. At the risk of sounding like a teenager, that totally sucked. They were my friends, and just 'cause you happen to be the original - oh, and tell me you haven't freaked out about whether or not that's true and you'd be lying - you get to keep them. Bastard.

Also, I still can't buy beer. Maybourne keeps me supplied, but that's not the point.

I can't even talk to them once in a while? I mean, yeah, it would be weird, I get that. But you live weird! You talk to aliens on a regular basis! You can't cope with me wandering in and out of your life every so often?

I know, it's hardly your fault, but that's my life, damn you! Me. The pronouns here are impossible.

Just because you look right. Just because technically I'm only sixteen months old. I think I have a right to be bitter, here. I bet I'm the only kid in high school with PTSD.

How 'bout I pull everything else out of the corner with me, huh? The screaming nightmares, they're fun, and before Harry found me I didn't have anything to help deal with them, so thanks for that. Charlie! He'd look a bit like me, but darker, wouldn't you say? Which is odd, considering Sara's intrinsic blondeness. Speaking of blondes, how's Carter? You ever... nah.

How about the other kid, hmm? Laira's kid. Be a few years old now. It's a good age. Remember that fishing rod I gave Charlie, his fifth birthday? He was damn proud of that. The stillest he ever sat, the first time we went fishing and he had his very own rod. Didn't catch a damn thing, of course, either of us, but it was a good day nonetheless.

Yeah, I'm a bastard. This is news to you?

I think I'm really more of a bastard than you, right now. More like I was before that first trip to Abydos. Before I met Skaara. Before I met Daniel.

I nearly turned up on his doorstep one night, about a month after... all that stuff with Loki. I was about ready to collapse in tears, and I wanted someone sympathetic. You know what stopped me? I missed the damn bus.

I'm allowed the odd moment of weakness. I blame that particular one on the hormones.

Shit. I really am being a bastard, aren't I? Sorry, I just... I lost my whole life. I lost my life, and you're just going on living it.

I'm not about to untie you, you understand, because you'd kick my ass - well, maybe not, but you do have an advantage in the brute force department, so I'm not about to risk it. But I'll call someone to come get you. Huh, Daniel or Teal'c? 'Cause Teal'c wouldn't say anything but he'd look at you, the way he does. And it's further for him, and he'd have to sign out of the base, but then Danny might be at work anyway...

Well. You won't be seeing me again. It was pretty stupid of me to come here at all, but I felt like... I don't know, I just had to see you one more time, let you know I'm leaving of my own volition. Not that you'd worry or anything, but I'd hate for George to waste resources on me.

Guess I won't be seeing you.