Why Does Twilight Make Me Cry?

Darien glances up when the bell on the door to the restaurant jingles. His partner is rambling about different techniques of interrogation and Darien is nodding accordingly. He doesn’t recognize her face or her hair, he recognizes her by her walk, the delicate placement of her sneakers on the linoleum.

Her once long blonde hair is now curly, short and red. It curtains her face. Darien can’t control his stare; he is awestruck by the appearance of his past lover. She is tall with an hourglass figure that he has memorized. Her legs disappear into a short, loose skirt. She dons a white tank top and has a dark tan. He hasn’t seen her in seven years, since he left her crying in a heap on the balcony of their apartment.

“Fawkes? Fawkes, you look like you’ve seen a ghost, you okay?” Bobby Hobbes asks, waving a French fry in his face.

She looks around, innocently, and meets Darien’s gaze. She has the most piercing blue eyes, he thinks. She pales with recognition.

“Goddammit,” Darien breathes.

She recovers herself and walks to his table. “Darien. How are you?” The lilting voice that made her a local star, is shaky.

“I’m good, Lia. You’re looking…good. How are you?” Darien is at a loss for words. There is an intensity that he hasn’t felt since their parting between them.

“Good,” She smiles nervously and tucks a curl behind her ear. “God, Darien, you’ve still got that power over me, the power to stop me cold.”

Bobby Hobbes stands up. “Excuse me a minute,” He winks.

“Oh no, I’m not staying,” Lia apologizes. She takes Bobby’s arm and eases him back into his seat.

“I have somewhere to be,” She says. “Bye, Darien.”

Darien reaches out and touches her elbow. An electricity passes between them. “Lia, wait.”

“Don’t. It’s been too long,” she whispers.

“Long enough for you to forgive me?” He asks. Hobbes watches the exchange, intrigued and embarrassed.

She smiles and turns back to him. “Oh, Darien. You were always forgiven, but you were gone.” She walks away. She takes a bag from the lady at the counter and exits, clearly shaken.

“Who was that and why aren’t you going after her?” Hobbes asks.

Darien hops up and runs through the door, jostling a waitress. Lia is standing on the sidewalk, looking at the door that Darien runs through.

“Lia.”

She shakes her head. “Goddamn you and your eyes. I think I could’ve walked away if you were wearing sunglasses or something.”

He stands close to her. He remembers her scent, he taste. “It’s been a long time, Lia.”

“Too long, Kitty.” Her face softens with his nickname. She always said he was too cute to be a ‘cat’ burglar.

“I’m sorry. I never had the words to call,” Darien says, taking her arms, gently.

She shivers with his touch. “Darien…good I hate what you do to me, you bastard.”

“Doesn’t our history owe me a chance to try and explain?”

Her blue eyes spark as she meets his eyes. “Our ‘history’ owes you a slap in the face and a puddle of spit.”

He holds her arms and she doesn’t pull away. She tilts her head.

“Wow. You look like you care,” she says.

“I’ve changed. Everything has changed. I’m not the man you used to know.”

Lia smiles. “You were never a man, Kitty, you were the oldest boy I ever met.”

“Fawkes! We gotta go,” Hobbes calls from the van behind him.

“You gotta go,” Lia says, inches from his lips, his kiss.

“Can I call you?” He breathes.

“No, Kitty, don’t.” She replies. “Someone’ll get hurt.”

“Nobody hurts you like I do,” Darien replies, echoing an old song.

“Fawkes!” Bobby yells, inside the van now.

Darien pulls out a crumpled card. He presses it into her hand. “Call me, Lia. Come on, it won’t bring damage.”

She kisses him softly on the cheek and smiles. “It already has.”

She turns away and Darien stands, watching her walk away.

“Fawkes!”

Darien climbs into the van, dazed. Bobby pulls away before he can even close his door,

“We’ve got to be downtown to meet that informant,” He explains.

“What?”

“That girl, she’s an ex of yours?” Hobbes smiles, realizing how shaken his partner is from the encounter.

“Oh god, Hobbes. That girl is Lia. She’s the only girl I ever…goddamn.” Darien can’t classify her.

“So what happened?”

“She doesn’t want to talk to me,” Darien replies.

“No, Fawkesy, what happened between you and her? You tell her you worked for UNICEF, too?” Bobby grins.

Darien shakes his head. “I wish. We were too young. We loved each other too much. You know how people say you can’t have too much of a good thing? Bullshit. We blew up like sodium and water. We just had too much passion. And I left her.”

“You left her? Did you cheat on her or something?”

Darien sighs. “We just flamed out. I don’t know. One night I just realized that I couldn’t live without her, that I couldn’t breathe right without her and I flipped. I was scared and I went into this jealous fit and broke everything in the house. She just watched me. And I left, went to a bar, fucked a girl and left town. I couldn’t face her after that, and I knew if I saw her that I would never be able to let her go.”

“You just left? No note?”

“I was twenty-four. I didn’t know how to do anything but quit. I left all my clothes, everything. Wasn’t she beautiful?”

Bobby shakes his head as he parks the van. “Fawkes, you’re crazier than I am. You had that beautiful girl and you just trashed it.”

Darien sighs. “Tell me something I don’t know.”

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

<>

“Darien, get off me!” Lia laughed, gasping for air as Darien tickled her. Her waist-length blonde hair was splayed on the beige carpet beneath her.

“I didn’t hear the words!” Darien replied, his long legs trapping her underneath him.

“UNCLE!” She shrieked, and he released he. He collapsed beside her. Boxes and garbage bags full of their belongings surrounded them. After dating three months, they decided to save cab fare and get a place together.

Lia caught her breath and straddled his prone body. She looked down on his content face. She ran her fingertips across his skin.

“This is good. You’re good.”

“You’re good for me,” Darien replied.

She kissed him. “Am I part of a daily balanced breakfast?” She grinned, her lips against his ear.

“You’re all five food groups rolled into one,” He replied, and soon, they weren’t talking.

They barely heard the knock on the door. Lia pulled down her t-shirt and went to the door.

“It’s your probation officer,” She said, over her shoulder. She pulled open the door. “Hi, Bennie.”

“Afternoon, Lia. Where’s my felon?” The graying man asked, as she let him in.

“Over here. How are you, Bennie?” Darien asked, lying on the floor with his hands behind his head.

“Okay, Darien. I’m just checking to make sure you’re sticking around town.”

“He’s only got a month to go, Bennie,” Lia said, perching atop a nearby box.

“Exactly,” Bennie grinned.

Darien sat up. “Bennie, Bennie, Bennie. When are you going to get it?” He stood and went to Lia. “This lady is my life.”

She looped her fingers through the belt loops on his jeans and pulled him toward her. “We’re linked, Bennie, attached at the hip.”

Bennie, a year from retirement, smiled. “You’re loony, that’s what you are.” He tilted his head a little and asked Lia, “What do you see in him?”

Lia grinned. Darien watched her, curiously.

“Well, Bennie, when the light’s just right and I tilt my head to the left about a quarter inch and I’ve had three shots of tequila and a cigarette, well, then I see the sweetest, most caring man I’ve ever met.” She kissed him on the lips and then turned to Bennie. “But basically, he’s good in the sack.”

Bennie laughed, going to the door. “Watch that one, Fawkes. She’s a firecracker!” He closed the door behind him as Darien and Lia disappeared into each other’s arms.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Darien doesn’t say anything as Hobbes pumps his informant for information. He has so much to say to Lia but she just walked away from him. He hurt her much more than he meant to.

“Fawkes, come on,” Bobby interrupts his thoughts. Hobbes stands beside him, the informant long gone.

“Sorry.” He follows him to the van.

“That girl must be something else to make you this quiet. Ready to head back to the agency?”

“Sure.”

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

<>

“Darien? Is that you?” Lia yawned from the bedroom as she heard the door slam. When she didn’t get a response after several moments, she went to the doorway.

“Kitty?” She called, flipping on the light switch.

“I’m so sorry, Lia,” Darien gasped, holding his arm against him. He was dressed in black but the only thing Lia saw him wearing was a grimace of pain.

“God, Darien, sit down, baby!” She pulled him into the kitchen and pushed him gently to the floor.

“Lia,” Darien started.

“Darien, hush. I’m going to cut this shirt off, okay? Are you alright, baby?” She tried to focus on the task at hand.

Darien didn’t want to look in her eyes, but he did anyway, but all he saw was worry.

Lia cut off his shirt and found the bullet wound in his upper arm. “Oh baby, no,” She sighed. She left him for a minute and returned with a first aid kit.

“Are you okay?” She asked. Darien didn’t answer. She took his face in her bloody hands and made him look at her. “Darien.”

“I’m okay,” He said, humble.

She took his hand. “Baby, I’ve got to clean this. It’s a clean wound, no bone or anything but this is going to hurt. Just hold onto my hand, okay?”

“Crap. Okay.” He closed his eyes. Lia closed hers too when she positioned the bottle of rubbing alcohol over his wound. He let out a yell once she started to pour.

“Damn,” He said, shakily, as the sting faded to a throb.

“Sorry…let go of my hand, please, so I can bandage you.” She put a pad on each side of his wound and wrapped them tightly with gauze. Finally, she leaned back on her heels.

She took his hands and squeezed them. She slowly got to her feet and turned to the sink, then washed her hands. Darien watched her. She was wearing white boxers and blue button-up shirt, both Darien’s. She had his blood on her arms and legs.

“Lia, are you…” Darien started. She walked away. Her back is to him as she opened a drawer and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. She clicked on the stove and heated up an eye. She lit her Camel off the heating eye. She took a long drag.

“I thought you quit,” He said.

“I thought you quit,” She replied, tears running down her face.

He pulled himself to his feet and went to her. “Lia, I’m sorry…”

“I knew you weren’t going to change, but…Darien, you’re hurt! You’re not supposed to get hurt!” She cried.

“Baby, it was an accident!” He protested. “Please, don’t be angry…I can’t handle it if you’re angry.”

“I’m not angry, you stupid bastard,” She choked. “I’m scared! What if some cop knocks on my door next time and tells me you’re dead! God, Darien!”

“I’m okay,” He said, realizing suddenly the depth of her feelings. “Lia, I’m all right.” He hugged her tightly with his good arm. He started to stagger, the loss of blood finally affecting him.

“Kitty? Come on, let’s get you into bed,” She said, supporting him as they stain the carpet on the way to the bedroom.

“Nobody was supposed to be there,” Darien explained quietly.

“I don’t want to hear about it, Darien. Just lie down.”

He collapsed into bed. She sat, cross-legged beside him, holding his hand. He drifted off into sleep but she watched him all night, chain-smoking and watching him breathe.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

“What’s up with Darien?” The Keeper asks, whispering into Bobby’s ear in the Keep.

“Old girlfriend sighting,” Bobby replies, quietly.

Darien is pensive. He sits across the room from them. He’s sitting at the Keeper’s desk, but for once, he is not picking at her files or fiddling with her computer.

“Do you guys need me anymore?” Darien asks, suddenly.

“Not really. Go on home partner. Remember, be here tomorrow at nine,” Bobby nods.

“Sure thing, night.” Darien exits quickly, before he changes his mind.

He goes to his apartment and free falls onto his bed.


Darien has changed a lot since his life with Lia. After leaving her, he devoted all his time to becoming a better thief, which landed him in jail a second time. Finally, with his third strike, he was waiting for his ride to prison when his brother showed up with an opportunity. Darien volunteered to be a test subject on his brother’s project and was implanted with a biosynthetic gland that can be activated to turn him invisible. Since his brother’s death, Darien has been working with a government agency that supplies him with the regular injections he needs to counteract the gland’s secretions that cause insanity.


So now, he is constantly on call with the Agency and is always under a microscope. He’s an ex-con superagent and he’s miserable. Seeing Lia today was a reminder of how good life can be, how life used to be worth living.

He hears a timid knock on his door. He sits up and walks the few steps to the door.

“Lia, hey,” He says, opening the door.

She holds up the card in the palm of her hand. “Your address is on this card. Along with a shopping list. Since when does Darien Fawkes buy dryer sheets?” She smiles.

“I’m the new and improved Darien. Come in.” He moves out of her path and she enters.

She has changed clothes. She’s wearing tight flared jeans and a short black v-neck shirt.

“Nice place. Kind of retro.”

Darien closes the door and turns to face her. “Did I tell you how goddamn beautiful you are?”

She blushes. “It’s really been too long if you sweet talk is getting through to me, Kitty.”

She surveys his apartment again before taking a seat on his pool table.

“I don’t know what I’m doing here, Darien. It’s been seven years, for God’s sake, but…seeing you today…I guess it’s been long enough for me to forget why I hate you so much.” Lia brushes a curl out of her eye.


Darien takes a seat beside her on the table. “I remember. I left you. I’m sorry.”

Lia laughs, sadly, looking at her dangling feet. “I thought about you. I had all these scenarios of what I would say to you. Sometimes I’d walk away, sometimes I’d slap you, sometimes I’d kiss you…but when I saw you today, you know all that I could think about?”

Darien shakes his head as she turns to him.

“I thought about that night your friend died and I came home and found you standing in the shower. You were shivering and wrinkled and you’d been standing there for hours. I remember wrapping you in a towel and you kept saying, ‘he’s dead’, over and over. That’s what I thought about.” Lia touches his face, tracing his jaw. “You look like you did that night, Darien, and I…I loved you too much back then to be able to walk away.”

She takes his hand. “What happened, Darien? You look so sad, like a little kid lost in the mall or something.”

Darien smiles sadly. He kisses her gently on the lips. “I’m a different man. It’s a long story and I’m not allowed to talk about the important parts.”

Lia raises an eyebrow but doesn’t question it. They sit in silence for several minutes.

Darien squeezes her hand. “So what happened to you? Married? Kids? Album?”

She laughs. “None of the above.” She looks at Darien, curiously. “You know, none of the other guys ever made me feel the way you did. There’s just something about you I never got over.”

Darien looks out the window, but squeezes her hand. “I know that feeling. You are the only woman who ever understood me. Whenever I felt low, you were the only one who could bring me back up. You’re the one I still have dreams about.” He looks at his shoes. “You’re the one I regret.”

“You regret me?”

“No, never. I mean, I regret my choice. I mean, I’ve done some stupid things before, but leaving you was my stupidity masterpiece. Nothing ever made sense after you.” He smiles at her. “I left the only good thing that’s ever happened to me.”

They are quiet again.

“How’s Kevin?” She asks.

“Kevin died last year,” He replies, quietly.

“Oh, god, I’m sorry,” She gasps.

Darien nods. “You know, I was always spoiled. I never really knew what it was like to be all alone. When my mom died, I had Kevin. After that, I had you. When you were gone, I still had Kevin, but with Kevin dead…I really miss him.” He glances at Lia. “I miss you too.”

She kisses him, surprising him. The kiss lasts longer than either expects and is more intense than intended. She pulls away, suddenly, and hops down. She stands in front of him, holding his hands.

“Guess what I do now.”

Darien examines her. “Advertising?”

“Nope,” She smiles.

“Modeling?”

“Fuck you,” She laughs.

“I give up,” Darien grins, enjoying the playful and glowing Lia he used to know.

“I’m in my sister’s old line of work.”

Darien gasps. “You’re a stripper?”

She slaps one of his hands, playfully. “No, an exotic dancer. Be politically correct, Kitty.”

“Wow,” He grins. “I can see why, you’re gorgeous. What’s your stage name?”

“Luscious Lia.”

Darien laughs. “Perfect!”

“I make great money and I’ve got quite a nest egg from day trading.”

“Okay. My turn. Guess what I’m doing now.”

She looks him up and down. “You’ve still got the same sense of fashion. Hmm, car thief?”

He shakes his head.

“Jewel thief?”

“Nope.”

“Give me a hint,” She pleads.

“I’m not a thief.”

Lia gasps. “I’m stumped.”

“I’m an o-ffic-i-al government agent.”

“You’re shitting me!” She punches his shoulder. “Good for you! But aren’t you going nuts? You loved your job more than anybody I ever met!”

Darien sighs. “I’m kind of out of options. It was life in prison or this.”

“Good choice,” She grimaces.

Darien pulls Lia against him and kisses her. She tastes exactly like he remembers. As they get reacquainted, their hands explore each other. As soon as Darien’s shirt falls to the floor, the phone rings.

“Crap,” He says.

“Saved by the bell,” Lia pants, red and flushed.

“What?” Darien answers the phone, out of breath.

“Fawkes? You working out or something? Why are you breathing so hard?” Bobby Hobbes asks.

“I ask again. What?”

“So impatient!” Hobbes pouts.

“Hobbes,” Darien starts, annoyed. He watches Lia examine a comic book from his counter.

“Okay, Fawkes. The fat man needs us here tomorrow by nine.”

“Hobbes, I know that,” Darien sighs.

“Oh, sorry. I didn’t know you were in such a mood! You okay?” Hobbes asks.

“Fine. Is that it?” Lia has sat down on his couch, reading the X-Men.

“Fawkes, you’re really moody…” Hobbes starts, but Darien hangs up.

“Do you still write little philosophy quotes everywhere?” Lia asks from the couch.

Darien flops down beside her.

“Not as much.”

Lia flips through the comic. “I remember when you said you wanted to leave a card with a little quote at every house you robbed. ‘Something to make them think’, you said, as if being robbed blind wasn’t enough to think about.”

“I’m really glad you talked me out of that.”

Lia tosses the comic down, and looks at Darien. She traces his body from his neck to the button on his jeans.

“God, Lia. I’ve missed you…All the things in my life, all the crap, it just disappears when I’m here with you.” He takes her wandering hand and kisses it. When the skin of her hand leaves his lips, he meets her mouth.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

<>

“Where’ve you been, Lia?” Darien asked. “You were supposed to be home an hour ago.” He was sitting in their darkened apartment with dwindling candles casting a flickering glow.

“I’ve had the shittiest day.” She dropped her purse and opened her cigarette drawer. “Where are my smokes?”

“You ran out yesterday. Where have you been?” Darien repeated.

“I was at rehearsal, Darien. Since when did you start keeping a timecard?” She asked, becoming defensive.

“I was worried. You’re always home before seven, Lia,” He replied, angrily.

“So I was late, big deal. Get over it.” She found a half-smoked butt in the ashtray.

“Lia,” He started to argue.

“You would not believe what happened to me today,” She interrupted. Darien didn’t notice how shaky and anxious she was. Her hair was unbrushed and she had dark bags under her eyes.

“I’ve had the absolute worst day,” She said, puffing off the butt. “I was late for rehearsal and as soon as we finished, Biff, our manager, pulled me aside and said, ‘Lia, you’re a pretty girl,’, you know in that punkass Bronx accent, he says, ‘but to get ahead , you’ve got to give a little head’ . Can you believe that?”

Darien, angry at her lateness, was even angrier after this announcement. In the last week, his jealousy has become uncontrollable and he is partially convinced that she is unfaithful because of her recent distance.

“What? Biff came on to you?” He asked, standing up.

“Bastard, I almost kicked him in the nuts,” She snapped.

“Why didn’t you?” He asked, picking up a picture and dropping it onto the floor. It shattered.

“Darien,” She gasped.

“Why didn’t you kick him, Lia?” He asked, tossing a vase at the wall. “Because you wanted it?” He dropped an ashtray. “Because your ex-con boyfriend is an ignorant bastard?” He threw a fishbowl, spilling ‘Flipper’ the goldfish onto the carpet.

Lia was crying. She grabbed a glass of water from the counter and collected Flipper.

“Is that it, Lia?” He asked, throwing another picture. “I’m not good enough for you?”

“Darien, stop,” She pleaded, hugging Flipper against her chest, her tears falling into his glass.

She backed away from him as he continued to yell and break their things. Finally, she retreated to the balcony.

Darien happened to glance at her. She was on her knees, her shoulders quaking with sobs. He dropped the lamp he had and went to her.

“Lia?”

“Fuck you!” She sobbed, gasping for breath. “Fuck you for being like all the rest, fuck you for making me love you, fuck you!”

“Fuck you, Lia,” He retorted.

She threw Flipper at him. The glass broke on the concrete of the patio and Flipper bites it under Darien’s boot.

“Fuck you, Darien! I did everything for you! I loved you, I loved you unconditionally, you bastard and you…Goddammit, you think I would cheat on you? God, Darien! You were all I needed! You were my heart! If you think I would cheat on you, then, fuck you! You don’t even know me!”

Darien’s rage faded. He couldn’t bear to see her in such pain and he knew by looking at her that she was telling the truth.

“Oh shit, Lia, Lia, please…” He started.

“Get out, Darien, fucking get away from me!”

Darien was shocked by her love for him and his own stupidity. He turned and walked out the door. It was the last time he would see her for seven years.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

“Fawkes? Fawkes, come on!” Bobby Hobbes bangs on Darien’s door the next morning. Finally, he pulls out a key and unlocks the door.

“Fawkes!” Bobby calls.

“He’s in the shower,” Lia mumbles, half-asleep in Darien’s bed.

“Oh. Sorry,” Bobby apologizes, blushing.

“S’okay,” She replies. “What time is it?”

“Um, around nine a.m.,” Bobby answers, unsure of the polite way out of this situation.

“What?” Lia sits upright, clutching the sheet against her. “Fuck me, I’m late!” She grabs wildly and pulls on her clothes in a flash.

“Do you see my shoes?” She asks Bobby, who is blushing by the door.

“By the couch,” Hobbes replies.

“God, thanks!” She steps into her shoes and starts out the door, past Bobby. She stops halfway out and turns to him.

“I’m sorry, my manners suck in the morning. I’m Lia.”

“Bobby Hobbes, ma’am,” He introduces.

“Do I look old enough to be called ma’am? Shit,” She smiles. “Nice to meet you, Bobby. Tell Darien to call me.” She disappears.

“Jesus, Hobbes, are you stalking me?” Darien groans, pulling on a shirt.

“You should have a sign on the door or something, you know, Do Not Disturb?” Bobby suggests.

“It’s my house!” Darien replies, frustrated.

“Lia said for you to call her,” Hobbes winks.

Darien clenches his fists and groans into the air in frustration.

“What?” Hobbes asks.

“I don’t have her number! She played me!” Bobby starts to laugh. “I can’t believe she played me!” Darien sighs.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Darien sees Lia the next night and she sporadically drops in over the next few weeks. She refuses to give Darien her phone number or address.

“Why won’t you let me call you?” Darien asks. They are spooning in his rumpled bed.

“I just want to take it slow,” She answers.

“We’re sleeping together, Lia,” Darien laughs.

Lia smiles. “But we’re not involved.”

“What? Lia…” Darien starts to protest.

“I don’t want to love you, Darien. Not after what happened. Can I ask you something?”

“Of course,” He says, still thinking about her answer.

“Did you find my letter? Is that why you left?”

“What letter?” Darien asks, oblivious.

“You never found a letter from me in our apartment?” She asks.

“No…what letter, Lia?”

“It’s not important now…it’s in the past…I’ve just always wondered.”

Darien’s curiosity is piqued. “What letter?”

She sighs and opens her mouth to reply when the armed men burst through the door.

“What the…” Darien says, starting to get up but a tranquilizer dart pierces his neck and he falls back onto the bed.

“Darien!” Lia shrieks, but springs into action. She rips a framed poster off the wall above the bed and slings it at the three men. They are startled by her presence and reflexively duck. Lia drags Darien by gripping his arms into the bathroom. She drops him, goes back into the room and gets the phone by throwing a lamp at the men. She locks the door behind her and stares at the phone.

She slaps Darien’s face, but he is out cold. Lia tries to think of the right scenario for her. She doesn’t call the cops, she knows she should call Bobby Hobbes but she doesn’t know his number. Instinctively, she presses ‘redial’.

“Bobby Hobbes,” A drowsy voice answers.

“Mr. Hobbes…This is Lia, Darien’s friend…” She winces as the men pound on the door.

“What’s wrong?”

“Um, some men just busted in here with guns…” She starts.

“Hang on…” She hears Bobby dialing another phone and speaking to someone else.

“Are you okay, Lia? Is Fawkes…” Hobbes returns to her.

“They shot him with a…a dart? He fell flat but he’s breathing…they’re breaking down the door,” She gasps. “What should I do?” She asks.

“Just sit tight…”

Lia drops the phone. She props Darien up against the tub and grabs a bottle of his shampoo with one hand. She finds a mop behind the door.

When the door gives, she sprays shampoo in the eyes of the first man and starts beating him with the mop. He falls to his knees, holding his hands over his eyes.

She manages to knock the gun out of the next man’s hand and smacks his face with the mop. His nose starts to gush blood.

Lia grabs the gun after a beat and fires, hitting the man with the bloody nose. He falls. She shoots the man she blinded and turns to fire on the third man, but there is a flurry of men in black in the room.

“Whoa! We’re the good guys, lady!” One man says.

“How do I know that?” She asks, shakily. Bobby Hobbes enters, dressed in sweatpants and a t-shirt.

“Calm down, Lia…whoa,” Hobbes says, seeing the two bleeding men.

“She got those two, we got this one,” Another agent informs Bobby.

Hobbes casually picks up a shirt and hands it to Lia. “Here. Where’s Fawkes?”

She points to the sleeping Darien, who sits oblivious against the tub. Hobbes goes to him.

Lia steps over the two men and sits down on the bed. “Does anybody have a cigarette?” She asks, shakily.

An agent hands her half a pack and some matches. She hands him the gun and takes them, gratefully. She looks at the man, curiously. “Didn’t you tip me twenty bucks yesterday?”

The man blushes. Lia does not notice Claire, Darien’s Keeper tiptoeing into the bathroom.

Lia lights the cigarette as she starts to shake.

Hobbes comes over to her. “Are you okay?”

“I quit smoking five years ago,” Lia replies. “Is Darien okay?”

“He’s fine. They shot him with a tranquilizer gun. Lia, how did you know to call me?” Hobbes has to run damage control and find out how much Lia knows about Darien’s life.

Lia’s eyes are clouded with shock. “He said one night that his life was really complicated. He said that he could never go to the hospital, that he had a private doctor because of his job and all the secretive work he does. Besides that,” She looks at Bobby, curiously, “Darien never went real well with cops, you know?”

“No, Lia, you did the right thing…Are you okay? You look a little…” Hobbes stops when he realizes that she is dazed.

“Claire?” Hobbes calls.

Claire comes over to Lia. “Is she okay?”

“I think she’s in shock,” Bobby says. “This is Lia, Keep.”

“Lia? Lia, can you hear me?” Claire asks, feeling her wrist for a pulse rate.

Lia looks at Claire’s hand. “I’m not dead. I’m Lia.” She twists her wrist and shakes Claire’s hand.

“Are you alright? Were you hurt?”

Lia shakes her head. “You must be Claire. You call Darien, ‘Dah-ree-en’, right? You’re his doctor?”

“I’m sorry, yes. I’m Claire.”

“Is he okay?” Lia asks, finishing her cigarette.

“He’ll be fine in a few hours,” Claire replies, as Lia starts to tremble more intensely. “Do you want something to calm down?”

“No…I just need a minute…it’s been a while since I shot anyone…” She looks at them, apologetically. “My dad was a cop…never mind…” She shudders. She starts to light another cigarette but she is trembling too much to light it.

“Here,” Bobby light it for her and coughs. He hands it to her. “Lia, can you tell me what happened?”

“Sure…we were talking and these three men just burst in…I guess Darien forgot to lock the door…can you guys hang on?” She hands the cigarette to a surprised Claire and dodges several agents on her way to the toilet to vomit.

Lia glances at Darien before returning to Claire and Bobby. She takes the cigarette, paler but shaking less.

“Sorry, when I get upset, I vomit…anyway, these three men ran in and Darien sat up and they shot him with the dart thing and he just keeled over. I guess I screamed because they stopped and I threw something at them…then I pulled Darien to the bathroom and grabbed the phone. I pressed redial because the only people I’ve ever seen Darien call is you and the Chinese delivery guy, Lo Lee Chin.” She smiles slightly, thinking of the deliveryman. “So, when they broke down the bathroom door, I squirted the first guy with some of Darien’s shampoo, that extra-strength prissy stuff he uses,” She pauses. “Hey, don’t tell him I did that. He pays twenty-five dollars a bottle for that shit.”

“Really?” Claire gasps. “Twenty-five dollars for shampoo?”

Lia nods. “You should see the conditioner.”

“Go on, Lia,” Bobby smiles.

“So I got the first guy in the eyes with shampoo and hit him a few times with the mop until he went down. I got the second guy in the face with the mop and knocked the gun out of his hands. I took the gun and shot them.”

“You’re amazing. Are you a cop or an agent or something?” Claire comments.

“I’m an exotic dancer,” She replies, flatly. Lia glances up at Claire and Bobby. “Do you guys know Darien well?”

“Sure, why?” Bobby asks.

“Does he mop? I mean, I didn’t think Darien knew how to mop, had ever even thought about mopping but he owns a mop. Damn…” Lia seems to drift away.

Hobbes stifles a laugh.

Lia glances up again. “I think I should go home.”

“I don’t know if you’re in any shape,” Claire protests.

“There are dead people over there,” Lia says, quietly. “I need to go home, buy a pack of cigarettes, drink a few glasses of scotch, vomit and pass out.”

“Okay,” Claire shrugs. “Sounds sage. Can we get someone to drive you?”

Lia nods. “I’ll get my car later.” She follows an agent to the door. She turns to Hobbes.

“Hey, Hobbes. Tell Darien to call me.” She turns and leaves.

Hobbes starts to laugh.

“What?” Claire asks.

“He doesn’t have her number,” He chuckles.

Claire smiles. “I think I like that girl.”

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Darien comes around several hours later. He is in the Keep in his familiar chair. “What the hell?”

“Good morning, Darien,” Claire says.

“Where’s Lia, is she okay?” Darien asks, blinking through the drug’s haze.

“She’s fine. She went home. She saved you, took out two of Chrysalis’ men and called Bobby. She’s quite a girl,” Claire says.

“Took out two guys? How?”

“She pulled you into the bathroom and…” Claire pauses, thinking about the shampoo. “And beat them with a mop to get their guns. She shot them.”

“Shit…I bet she was freaked. She hates guns,” Darien tells Claire. “Her dad was a cop and she had to kill this guy when she was little to save her father. She hasn’t touched a gun since then that I know of. Damn.” Darien stretches. “She’s been through years of therapy for it. She was okay?”

“She was a little shaken, but okay. She wanted you to call her,” Claire smirks.

“Goddamn her,” Darien curses.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Darien doesn’t hear from Lia for days. The good mood he had been experiencing vanished and he became his depressed brooding self. Finally, his partner, Bobby Hobbes decides to try and help.

Bobby visits several different strip clubs to try to find Lia. Around midnight on Saturday, he walks into a classy club. It is well lit, unlike many of the other places he has visited and the men are all well dressed. The women, however, are barely dressed at all.

He finds a seat and orders a beer from the bikini-clad waitress, not looking at her. “Do you know a lady named Lia?” He asks. He had hoped that his embarrassment would have dissipated by now, but he is still flushed and nervous.

“Luscious Lia comes on at one fifteen tonight. You a fan?” The woman smiles.

Bobby is encouraged. “Actually, I’m a friend. Do you think I could talk to her?”

The woman wrinkles her face. “Everyone’s always a friend. But you have a nice face, I’ll ask her if she knows you. What’s the name?”

“Bobby Hobbes,” He replies, passing her a five-dollar bill.

“Honey, you really don’t come into many places like this do you?” She laughs. She takes his hand and guides it to the waistband of her bikini. “The money goes here.”

Bobby turns even redder with embarrassment. She struts away with her stiletto heels clicking on the floor.

Bobby sips from his beer, patiently, and about fifteen minutes later, Lia sits down across from here.

“This really doesn’t seem like your scene,” She says. She is wearing very high-cut black leather shorts and a black leather bra. She also wears knee high black leather boots. Bobby is speechless.

“Thanks for seeing me…” He stammers.

“Is Darien okay? Is that why you’re here?” Bobby realizes that she is worried.

“As far as his health goes, he’s fine.”

Lia sighs with relief. “Good. So…what are you doing here? If you came here to see me dance, well, that’s kind of creepy.”

“No, no, its not that. I wanted to talk to you about Darien,” Bobby stammers, flushing again. He tries not to look at the topless girl walking by their table.

“Mr. Hobbes,” Lia starts.

“It’s Bobby, and I know what you’re thinking. It’s none of my business, but Darien’s my partner, and even more than that, he’s my friend. And I think he loves you.”

Lia takes a deep breath. “Bobby. I know how close you and Darien are, but you don’t know anything about our relationship.”

“I know enough to see that he’s happier than I’ve ever seen him since he started seeing you again.” Bobby takes a swallow of beer. “He’s been going through a rough time lately, really rough, and I was really worried about him. Then he started seeing you and he changed. I know you haven’t talked to him since the other night, and he’s worrying me again.”

Lia nods. “I could tell when I saw him the first time the other day that he was struggling with something. He was more depressed than I’ve ever seen him, and I’m sorry you’re worried, but I can’t see him right now. I’ve got too much to process.” Miraculously, she pulls a pack of cigarettes from her tight shorts and lights one. “Darien forfeited any right to be in my life a long time ago and I was trying to tell him the other night when those men burst in that I’m not sure I can ever trust him the way I used to.”

“I’m asking you, Lia, to try. I’m not sure Darien can handle losing you,” Bobby admits.

Lia looks at him curiously. “You don’t think Darien would do anything to hurt himself, do you? ‘Cause that’s not the Darien I know.”

“You don’t know this Darien,” Bobby admits. “I’m not saying he’s going to hurt himself, I’m just saying that he might not try to save himself. Lately, he hasn’t been putting up much of a fight; he seems to let stuff happen to him. Its like he doesn’t have anything left to live for.”

“Is this about Kevin?” Lia asks.

“A little. Before you came into the picture, he was eating his lunch at Kevin’s grave every day. I hate seeing my partner in such pain.”

Lia nods. “You’re a good friend to him. You’re here, obviously out of your element, to try to get me to talk to him. I can’t promise anything, Bobby, we have a history. I was trying to keep things simple between us, but nothing’s ever simple with Darien.”

“I know that,” Bobby smiles.

“It’s really been a long time for us, and I think it was a bad idea for us to even get involved again. I’m different, he’s different, but the feelings we get are the same.” She smiles at Bobby. “I really don’t know what to do. I haven’t been to see him because I know when I see him, all bets are off. He just looks at me, and I crumble into pieces. I had to take a break and try to find my way back to myself. It took me years to get over Darien. Years, Bobby, and I think I came out of it stronger than before. But now, now that he’s back, I feel myself slipping, like I’m losing control of everything. I mean, I killed a man the other night to protect him.” She takes a slow drag off her cigarette.

Bobby nods, knowingly. “Lia, let me ask you this. Do you love him?”

“I never stopped, but if you tell him, I’ll kill you,” She sighs.

“I think he knows.” Bobby notices that she is shaking. “Lia, if you love him, then don’t you think that you should try to make it work?”

Lia shakes her head. “The question of history comes up again.”

“He was young, Lia. It was a long time ago,” Bobby defends, but he stops, seeing her face.

“Yeah, he was young, but so was I.” She looks up at him, with tears in her eyes. “I wrote him a letter a few days before he left. I had been pulling away from him, being more distance because of something I found out. I told him about it in the letter. It took everything I had to write that letter. Then he was gone. He left in a rage, leaving me in an apartment full of shattered glass.” She finishes her cigarette. “All these years, I thought he left because of that letter.”

“Did he?”

Lia shakes her head. “I asked him the other night and he said he never saw it. I believed him, but that just makes me more confused. He didn’t have a reason, he just left. When he told me that it didn’t have anything to do with the letter, I freaked. If those thugs hadn’t busted in, I think I would have left anyway. I mean, he didn’t even need a reason to leave me.”

Bobby realizes how upset Lia actually is beneath her tough exterior. He takes her hand. “This is really hard for you, isn’t it?”

“Yeah it is. I’m sorry, Bobby. I know you’re just looking out for Darien, but I…I have to look out for myself. I’m not sure it would be good for me to start something with Darien.”

Bobby nods. “I can see that. I’m sorry for coming by.” He squeezes her hand. “Lia, what was in that letter?”

She shakes her head. “It doesn’t matter now.”

“It matters to you,” He replies quietly.

“You promise not to tell Darien?” She asks.

“If you want me to,” Bobby replies, sensing that she wants to tell him.

“I do. I don’t want him to know. The guilt would eat him up inside. I don’t mind telling you because I think it might make you understand a little more why I’m so reluctant to get involved again.” She lets go of his hand and runs it through her hair. “The letter said that I was three weeks pregnant.”

Bobby involuntarily gasps.

Lia sighs. “I kept trying to tell him, but I was so scared that he would…I didn’t know what he would do. So I wrote him that letter. All these years, I thought he read the letter and left me. Now, I don’t know what to think. Maybe if I had told him, he would have stayed.” She laughs, anxiously. “Maybe me and Darien and our baby would have been happy somewhere.”

“What did you do?” Bobby asks, quietly.

Lia looks at him. “I cried. I cried for days after he left, waiting for him, sitting by the phone. I didn’t eat, I smoked cartons of cigarettes, I drank gallons of whiskey. I wasn’t worried about being pregnant then, I was worried about being alone. My sister found me about a week after he left. I lost the baby.” She lights a fresh cigarette. “See, I love Darien and I would be with him in a heartbeat if it was simply the problem of him leaving me. But I refuse to let a man break me down like that again. Darien’s the only man who could ever hurt me that way.”

Bobby nods. “I had no idea.”

“Lia? The boss needs you,” A topless girl interrupts.

“Thanks. I have to go. I’ll think about what you said, Bobby. Thanks for coming by,” Lia says, standing up.

“Thank you for seeing me,” Bobby replies.

“Hey Bobby? Take care of him for me?” She says, turning away.

“I’ll try.”

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Darien is late for work again. He walks into the Agency, exhausted from lack of sleep and nightmares. He collapses into a chair in the Official’s office.

“Fawkes, you’re late. Eberts, make a note,” The Official says.

“Already noted,” Eberts replies.

Hobbes glances at him worriedly. Darien doesn’t meet his eyes.

“Sorry boys, but there’s nothing for you today. I’m going to give you the day off. It’ll help the budget. Now get out,” The Official says. “Fawkes, stop by the Keep before you go.”

“Why?” Darien asks.

“Because you look like hell. Now get out.”

Darien follows Bobby into the hallway.

“You okay, partner?” Hobbes asks.

“I’m fine.” He runs his hands through his hair.

“You want to get some lunch?” Hobbes offers.

Darien shakes his head. “Not today. I think I’m going to go home and pass out. After I report to the Keeper, that is.”

“Okay, Fawkes. You call me if you want to get together. Okay?” Hobbes asks, but Darien is already down the hall.

The Keeper takes one look at him and prescribes bed rest. Darien winces at the sunlight when he leaves. He drives home, trying not to think about Lia. Most of his energy these days is spent trying not to think about Lia.

He opens his door and drops his keys on the pool table. He instinctively quicksilvers when he hears a noise inside the apartment. He recognizes the back of Lia’s head. She is sitting on the couch, flipping through an old philosophy textbook he bought at a thrift store. He sheds the quicksilver and walks up behind her.

“Lia. How’d you get in?” She jumps when he speaks and turns around.

“Don’t you remember when you taught me to pick locks? I remember.” She replies, unsmiling.

He sits down beside her. “Are you okay?”

She looks at him, curiously. “Oh, yeah. They didn’t hurt me.”

“I know. But are you okay? I know what it must have taken for you to do that,” Darien says.

Lia nods. “I think I’m okay. Sorry I didn’t come by, I had a lot to think about. I was trying to catch you before you went to work, but I got caught in traffic. I decided to just wait.”

“I’m not supposed to get off for hours. How long were you going to wait?” Darien asks, trying to contain his emotions. The room is tense but he is afraid to touch her.

Lia shrugs. “I don’t know. I hadn’t thought about it. I just knew I had to see you.”

“Here I am,” Darien says, quietly. “I missed you. I thought that maybe you were punishing me. You know, I leave you, you leave me. I deserve it, you know.”

“Yeah, I know,” She replies. She nudges him with her elbow. “I’m joking, Darien.”

He smiles, but only for her sake. “I’m sorry. I guess I’m getting a bad vibe or something. Something’s telling me that this visit is not going to be a good one.”

Lia sighs. “You’re probably right. I don’t even know what I’m doing here. I was kind of glad when you weren’t here. I was sitting here looking at your things. Everything in this apartment is so…you. You’re one of a kind, Darien. Maybe that’s why it was so hard for me to get over you.”

“Before we get into this, tell me. Is this because of our history or because of the other night?” Darien interrupts.

“What exactly do you think I’m going to say?” Lia asks, brushing a strand of hair out of his face. He takes her hand.

“I don’t know. That you don’t love me. That I can’t see you anymore. That I hurt you so badly that you can never forgive me. I don’t know what you’re going to say, Lia.”

Lia smiles sadly and brings his hand to her lips. “I don’t know what I’m going to say either, Darien.”

They are quiet. They sit and hold each other’s hand, content for a moment just being together.

“Your partner came to see me last night,” Lia says, quickly. “Bobby.”

“Bobby…he what?” Darien asks, stunned.

“He’s worried about you. He wanted me to give you another chance. I was kind of surprised. You were always kind of a loner, but Bobby, well, he seems like a good friend,” Lia says.

“He didn’t say anything to me. How did he find you?” Darien asks, still shocked.

“I think he just rode around to different strip clubs until he found me.” Lia smiles, thinking of Bobby’s nervousness.

“Hobbes in a strip joint? I don’t believe it.” Darien laughs aloud.

“Yep. He was red as blood the whole time. Has he ever seen a naked woman before?”

Darien grimaces. “Did he…”

“He left before my show started, thank god. He probably would have exploded,” She kids. “Anyway. We had a good talk.”

“About me?” He asks, cursing Hobbes’ interference.

“And me. I tried to explain to him why being with you is so hard for me.”

Darien looks at her, surprised. “Are you going to explain it to me?”

Lia shrugs. “I was hoping I wouldn’t have to. I have a suggestion.”

“What kind of suggestion?” Darien asks.

She takes her hand away and puts it in her lap.

“Lia, let me say this first. I love you. Seeing you has changed my life. You have no idea what the last few years have been like for me. You are the light in my day. You’re the first thought I have when I wake up in the morning and I dream about you at night. Before I saw you again, I was having nightmare after nightmare, but as soon as I saw you in that diner, I remembered what it was like to be in love. I love you. I want you in my life. I don’t know if I can go on if you won’t stay.” He stops, breathless. He tries to catch his breath, but he can’t read her expression. He hadn’t meant to say as much as he did, he only wanted to convince her to give him a second chance.

Lia turns away. “Darien,”

“Lia, please. Look at me and tell me that you don’t love me. Look at me, Lia,” He pleads, thinking that he is losing her.

She doesn’t look at him. She looks at her hands. “Darien. Do you know that every night after you left, I sat on the balcony of the apartment where you left me and cried? I didn’t cry the entire time, just when it turned twilight. Something about the night falling, the color of the sky softly fading to black, it reminded me of you. That color, its like you. You’re not bad, you’re not evil and black like the night, like you used to dress, you’re good. You’re like the bright blue sky, full of clouds and birds and happy stuff, but you’re not perfect. You’re twilight. You’re a little of both, but you don’t know which.”

Darien doesn’t know what to say. It is taking all his strength to keep from crying and getting onto his knees.

Lia stands up and turns to him with shaking hands. “Like I said. I have a suggestion.”

“Okay.” He waits expectantly.

She hands him an envelope. Darien opens it and pulls out a blank sheet of paper.

“What’s this?”

“A blank page,” Lia replies. She hands him an index card and leaves before he can say anything.

He turns it over. It reads: “7:00 p.m. La Chateau Restaurant: Bring the page.”

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Darien wears a nice suit and his white tennis shoes. He glances around the fancy restaurant, holding the envelope. He feels a hand on his shoulder and turns.

“You must be Darien. Hi, I’m Lia.”

He looks at her curiously. “Hi, Lia,” He plays along.

“Nice to meet you,” She replies. She takes the envelope from his hands and leads him to their table.

“Lia, what are you doing?” Darien asks, sitting down across from her.

She unfolds the page on the table. “You see this? This page is blank. No words, no pictures, nothing. No history. This is where we start tonight. Do you want to fill up this page with me?”

Darien slowly smiles.

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