unordinarysk8erchick: The note was going to be my last attempt. But seeing as I never gave it to you, I'm doing my last attempt right now. Now if you're going to do what you've been doing for the last week, so be it. I'll be gone. But I'm not worrying about this anymore. There's alot of stuff I've been having to get rid of this year. And it's not fun. And if you wanna go the dump truck too, hell, I'm not going to stop you. Obviously, none of our so-called friendship means anything to you if you choose that. And I won't hold it against you. But I have right to fucking know either way. You owe me that.

sarcastic_skies: Our friendship does mean something to me, contrary to your popular belief. But it seems like when I do get to see you, I have to see Rebecca too! Not that I have anything against her, but when youa sk me to talk to you about our friendship, she's right behind you! I'm sorry, but I don't want to talk to Rebecca and Rebekah at that moment. I want to talk to Rebekah.

sarcastic_skies: Plus, after the first argument we had this school year, it seems like I'm getting the ice ray constantly.

unordinarysk8erchick: She's not here right now. It's you and me. And it's extreamly hard to NOT see you with Rebecca. Lunch is the only time I get too, and she's been a good friend to me. I'm not going to not hang out with her to make you happy. And I'm not upset about the freaking scream-match, I don't know how many times I'm going to have to tell you that.

sarcastic_skies: And maybe I am jealous. I understand you're making new friends, and I accept that. It's gut wrenching sometimes. New inside jokes, nicknames, boys. All things you neglect to tell me about. So I feel like the third wheel constantly.

unordinarysk8erchick: And I know that hurts. I know that it sucks to feel that way, because I've felt unwanted by our gang the whole year. But that's what happens when you feel that way. You leave, and you find new people. With friends, you have inside jokes. You have new nicknames. It's all this neverending cycle. I've told you about Logan. But she's right in the thick of it, so she knows more. It's impossible to include you on that big of a leval, because I don't see you enough to.

sarcastic_skies: And I'm not asking you to not be friends with Becca. She's a nice girl. But it's like, when I sit with you at lunch you don't even talk to me. 99% of the conversation you talk about is with Becca!

unordinarysk8erchick: That's because you've been so completley detatched this year, I feel like you don't WANT me to say anything. And when I do, you roll your eyes and sigh. And I'm to the point where I won't try anymore, when I get that back.

sarcastic_skies: I don't roll my eyes. But I sigh when I feel like I'm getting an icy comment.

unordinarysk8erchick: I've been in an icy mood. Which you can't fully understand, because you're not there. And neither am I. I know that. It's hard, it's new and high school, and we're all trying to adjust. But you're not Becca. You've known me forever. And you seem too willing to give that up.

sarcastic_skies: ANd yes I've been detached this year, I've completely stopped going to lunch because there is no point to sitting with someone who ignores me completely unless it's to give me a look.

unordinarysk8erchick: You make the decision to fade to the backround. I don't do it for you. You don't say a word either, don't lay it off on only me.

sarcastic_skies: i don't want to give up our friendship, you're the only friend I can actually carry a conversation with.

unordinarysk8erchick: And I'm not in any of Becca's classes either, so lunch is a time I want to catch up with her too. And everyone else. But none of our so called friends talk to me. I just want to throw up around half of you guys. So, I pull away, and none of you grab me by the arm. And I have to sit there and watch everyone just gang up on me, because it's the cool thing to do. Oh, everyone's mad at Rebekah, let's follow suit! That's exactly how it feels like, when I haven't even been there to do anything wrong.

sarcastic_skies: It's not my group anymore. Nobody talks to me unless it's convenient. And that's just the point you catch up with Becca. Just Becca. sarcastic_skies: I feel like i'm outside the window all the time.

unordinarysk8erchick: I don't see you asking to be let in. I see you running as fast as you can down the street because I'm making new friends.

sarcastic_skies: I'm running down the street to find my place in line behind all your new friends.

sarcastic_skies: You don't listen when I ask. You say icy things.

sarcastic_skies: How is that supposed to make me feel?

sarcastic_skies: Why should I say anything if you just say something bitchy, rebekah?

unordinarysk8erchick: But that's just it, I don't have all these new friends. I hang out with TWO new people. Becca, and Amanda. They're the only new addition. And you know, I can't remember once saying anything bitchy. Besides for this past week, because you've been pushing away girl.

unordinarysk8erchick: You haven't once approached me about why you've been so angry. So, who's really inside the house?

sarcastic_skies: I can't approach you by yourself!

sarcastic_skies: You're always with Becca!

unordinarysk8erchick: You're always with Maria. That hasn't stopped me.

unordinarysk8erchick: It goes both ways, hun.

unordinarysk8erchick: And it's not as if I'm not on messenger all the time. Or like I don't have a phone.

sarcastic_skies: YOu say that I'm the one whose pushing away but it actually looks like you're the one who got in a row boat and is pushing off the dock.

sarcastic_skies: You don't seem to see that you've been acting completely cold towards me. unordinarysk8erchick: How have I, when half the time, you're at a completley differant table?

unordinarysk8erchick: When I go over there, and you don't feel like moving? When I get a sigh every time I speak? When you're obviously upset, but won't tell me why?

unordinarysk8erchick: I see what it's like to have actual friends now. Ones that care. That don't put me down. That love me. That's not something I'm very framiliar with, generally. You were the only one out of all of them that was there. And now suddenly, you're not.

sarcastic_skies: I sigh: Because you say something bitchy. I don't feel like moving: because my FEET hurt. I trek back and forth with 20 pounds of books. I won't tell you why I'm upset: Because everytime you ask, you're with becca. And I dont' think I should have to digress our problems in front of a complete stranger.

sarcastic_skies: I have ONE friend. That's you. But I"m not the one who hasn't been there. You haven't been there.

unordinarysk8erchick: And that's what this boils down to isn't it? It's not that I haven't been there, it's that I've been there with other people.

unordinarysk8erchick: And you can't handle that?

unordinarysk8erchick: It's not as if I don't invite you places. But you HAVE to grasp the fact, that where I'm inviting you, I'm inviting new people too. It's not like you couldn't just come over by yourself and us just hang out. I'd be totally with that. But you haven't been very itching to do it. And Becca will always be a stranger unless you talk to her, and get to know her. Because that isn't fair. You don't even know her.

unordinarysk8erchick: < wonders if Yahoo is shitting the place up, because your typing thing goes away with out any actual IM's.

sarcastic_skies: You invited me one place. You haven't invited me over to hang. And you never give me anything to go on when i ask how you are.

sarcastic_skies: I understand you're with new people.

sarcastic_skies: But when I'm with you. You don't even talk to me.

unordinarysk8erchick: I've talked to you maybe what, three or four times, this entire week. I've only GONE one place. If you were to say, I'd rather just you and me hang, then I'd be like, okay fine. But you don't. You sigh.

sarcastic_skies: *smacks forehead* ANd I'm supposed to say this in front of Becca?

unordinarysk8erchick: Um, do I not have a phone? Or this handy dandy laptop>

unordinarysk8erchick: *?

unordinarysk8erchick: If you don't tell me that's what you want, I won't know. I can't read minds.

sarcastic_skies: YOu know what, we're going in circles. I'm just going to state my points. I don't know Becca, she seems nice. I'd like to get to know her. I'm not going to talk about our problems in front of strangers. You've been bitchy to me lately, and you do ignore me at the table. I don't want to end our friendship, but lately it seems like you do.

unordinarysk8erchick: Now let me state mine. Becca is here to stay, and she WILL be around during lunch time. Deal with it. Secondly, if you don't want to discuss our problems at lunch, then you need to take it up with me online or on the phone, and you haven't made one attempt, it's all been me. So you have no justification in that corner, either. I haven't been even around to be bitchy to you, and it's not as if you've been sweet to me either. I ignore you at the table, because A) you seemed less than enthused to be there, and B) You've sat down there about twise, both on very bad days for me.

[logs off]

unordinarysk8erchick: This is my point, instead of talking this out, you sign off. YOU'RE the one who refuses to be my friend. YOU'RE the one who's running away. I haven't changed. I'm still fucking here, but your ego is getting in the way of you even seeing that. You're beef is that I have new friends, and I'm no longer at the convienence of Halley. You don't give a damn about what's been going on in my life, so don't bitch about not knowing. You're viewpoint is seriously skewed. You're walking away, so don't get on my case for stopping to follow you. I am done with this conversation until you're the one to bring it up.

Yahoo! Messenger: sarcastic_skies has logged out. (8/23/2003 7:42 PM)

So I decided I need to list the ways that I myself, love Shego. But then again..who dosn't? But I like to think this is a bit more special, seeing as I run her listing, ya know, ya know..

1. She dosn't just love me, she luffs me!
2. She gave me my Livejournal code.
3. She actually reads said Live Journal.
4. Sometimes she gets commenty with it!
5. She thought up of the idea to be the trio.
6. She supports me.
7. She loves my graphics even when I don't.
8. She tells me what I need to hear.
9. Occasionally, that's what I want to hear.
10. She motivates me to screw her over with my graphics.
11. I don't have the suck-ass JM layout at htb because of her.
12. She <3's James Marsters.
13. She puts up with my poor-me mood swings.
14. She defends me, so don't talk shit.
15. She <3's Amy Lee and Evanescence as much as me.
16. She was worried about me when she lost me @ the Evanescence concert, but knew I could take care of myself.
17. She puts up with my Mom.
18. She knew right away how much I wanted to crowd surf at the Evanescence concert.
19. She likes my hair, and offers to brush it.
20. She visits my sites.
21. She asks me questions about PSP..and makes better stuff with my answers.
22. But dosn't rub it in.
23. She trusts me enough to tell me about things she knows I'll shake my head at.
24. She knows I will support her anyway.
25. She re-wrote Walk through the Fire with me.
26. And mentions it just to get me to laugh.
27. She worries about me like a mother.
28. She dosn't worry about me like MY mother though!
29. I love her like a fat kid loves cake!
30. She <3's "Goodnight Sweet Girl" as much as me.
31. I get on her case about stuff, but she knows it's cause I care.
32. She <3's her listing.
34. Or at least tells me that she <3's her listing..
35. She has a torrid affair going on with my fish.
36. She would admit to that in public.
37. When I said that my purple room made me sick, she offered to repaint it with me.
38. She listens to my problems.
39. She knows when to stop giving advice about them.
40. She always has loads of nicknames to give me.
41. She is always honest with me.
42. She understands my Justiny pain.
43. She tells me where she thinks he should go, even when I try to defend him.
44. She puts up with me defending him.
45. She <3's Spike, but would let me have him.
46. She says it's okay for me to cry.
47. I know she'll be there for me when Grandpa leaves me.
48. I know she will be there forever, even if she moves away.
49. Even though I can be a hanis bitch, she still luffs me.
50. She tells me what words mean, but has never called me stupid.
51. She makes me smile and laugh.
52. She wants to make a band.
53. She would include me in said band.
54. Hopefully, in a floor-sweeping capacity!
55. She <3's Buffy.
56. She calls me Faith.
57. She didn't get mad when I rubbed it in that I knew Chelle.
58. She wears wet pants.
59. She knows that she should have listened to me when I told her to wear the sneakers.
60. She values my opinion.
61. We have a ton of inside jokes.
62. That neither of us remember.
63. She wants to make a graphics site with me.
64. She thinks that I'm a good writer.
65. She sings good, and tells me I do.
66. We wrote a song about my dead cat.
67. When she hit the first note, I got the shivers.
68. She will have drunken Evanescence Kareoke at my funeral.
69. She thinks she will die two years after I do, cause that's how much younger she is.
70. You would never know that she is younger, because she's more mature that even I am...
71. Though she's still fun.
72. She'll pick on Vinny with me.
73. The entire Spike body parts thing at the concert.
74. She's my light at the end of the tunell.
75. She assures me that the tunell will end, and she will still be there even if it dosn't.
76. She didn't understand that whole "My Last Breath" thing in the tunnel.
77. She didn't get mad when me and Vinny picked on her about her wet pants.
78. I don't think she noticed she wasn't wearing pants till I said something.. lol.
79. She would have given me some of her sparkly bracelets.
80. She bought me my own sparkly bracelets.
81. She was happy I hosted her.
82. I was mad at her when I did, and without even wanting to, we were soon Rebekah and Halley again, and not even mad.
83. She instant messeges me when I'm in the same room.
84. She dosn't have to even talk to make me laugh, she can do it by typing.
85. She wants me to have pride in my work.
86. She reminded me to get drinks..even though I still didn't.
87. She goes to CPR classes with me.
88. Because..I'M A NURSE!! LOL.
89. She sees the James Marsters head too.
90. I've only been writing this list for 10 minutes, and I'm already on 90.
91. It's not cause I'm a fast typer.
92. She missed Kim Possible for me.
93. She dosn't think I'm preppy.
94. She said she could never hate me.
95. We made it through the Keith thing.
96. I don't get mad when she jacks my HTML.
97. She understands that I'm an anial freak when it comes to her fanlisting.
98. She told Paul to appoligize.
99. He hasn't. *COUGH*
100. She would still want me to move in with her, even if she was married to Paul.
101. She would teach me how to sheild my ears from the madness after hours.
102. She was ready with a water bottle when I lit the match box on fire.
103. She thought it would actually blow the house up.
104. We broke the video camera. TOGETHER. It's your fault too Halley! Lol.
105. She would endure the wrath of Mom for me.
106. We already got to 106..
107. She could easily be my BOB, except the fact that I know her offline..and I don't think she can be a BOB cause of that.
108. She never once told me I was spelling ho wrong. Till I noticed.
109. She made me two fansigns.
110. She could hear my Evanescence mix do that swirly thing. Lol.

I HAVE MORE..but I have to go clean my room. Lol.