Title: The Dying Of The Light
Category: MSR * warning- character death *
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: FTF, and some episode references over the course of the series.
Summary: Mulder's mind races to share his true feelings with Scully as the end of the world draws to a close.
Feedback: Oh please do- xenoprobe@hotmail.com or at http://www.xenoprobe.com

Disclaimer: Not mine, never were, make no profit, have no money- do not sue.

** I have never written a fic where Mulder or Scully die, so this was a new and horrific experience for me. I was crying at my desk at work! Me? Emotional? Nah **

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The Dying Of The Light
By xenoprobe

Her face was white. When the office door swung open, I thought I might be seeing the ghost of my partner- she was that pale. Tears rimmed her eyes and the look they gave me was so... so final.

"Scully?"

She didn't answer me. Instead, I stood, listening to the hollow clack of her heeled shoes as she walked to stand before me. Her small hands rose up and caressed the sides of my face and her cheeks reddened with each stroke of my skin.

"Scully what is it?" I whispered, trying again to draw out an answer.

"It's over... it's over " I could hear her chanting with each breath. I placed my hands to her shoulders and crouched a little to stare at her face to face.

"What's over, Scully- what's going on?" I could feel panic churning in my belly.

Suddenly, noises from outside spilled into our bubble universe. Car horns, screaming and alarms could be heard. In the J. Edgar Hoover building, there was a rush of footfalls in the corridors and I began to realize that their upset was linked to Scully's. "What's going on?" I repeated.

"It's over Mulder."

She slid her arms around me and squeezed. My hands came up into her hair- as if touching it, feeling its silkiness would distract me from the trouble brewing all around us. I pressed my mouth to her head, kissing her and holding her close.

From the corner of my eye I saw someone in the doorway- it was Walter Skinner. He was crying.

"You heard." He said, his voice weakened with emotion.

"No. But I think Scully has."

"It's all over Mulder." He wiped giant tears away with the pads of his fingers and stepped into the office. "The president just announced that during a missile launch test this morning, a nuclear weapon was detonated over Moscow. It's gone- there's nothing left. We've confirmed that D.C's been targeted and has less than an hour left. It's finished."

"No- no that can't be true. I, I refuse to accept that." I couldn't formulate a complete thought. Everything floated around in my brain, disjointed thoughts about unfinished work, open cases, overdue video rentals- there was so much left to get done, it couldn't be time to go.

"You can refuse all you like, but my advice to you Mulder is to make peace with it as fast as you can, there's no time to fight." Skinner turned and braced his arm against the doorjamb for a moment, gathering his strength before moving again.

"Sir?"

"Yes." He turned our way again.

"Thank you. Thank you for everything Walter." I was suddenly struck with the need to make it personal; it was all so personal now.

"Goodbye. Goodbye to you both." I felt Scully go slack in my arms as Skinner walked away. She was crying and I could feel the wetness of her tears through my shirt- on my skin. My knees felt weak and I knew we hand to sit down.

I moved us slightly, and swept the files, folders and pencils from my desk. Then I propped Scully up for a moment while I cleared everything from the bureau's surface. Scully and I climbed on top and sat facing each other. Our silence only amplified the cries from outside.

"Scully. Scully, I-"

"I love you." She interrupted, trying to smile but she broke into fresh tears.

"Oh Scully." I wept. I had to feel her, I had to touch and be touched. I pulled her close to me and she placed a leg on either side of me, wrapping herself around me tightly. Her fingers clawed at my chest and her trembling hands fought to unbutton my shirt. Her cold hands closed over my heart.

"So strong. You heart is racing- full of life Mulder. You're so full of life." She cried against me.

My hands traced up and down her spine and every second rang like a church bell in my head. No time- there's no time. I heard the echoes of her voice inside me and suddenly I was carried off into a swirl of memories.

That first night in Oregon when she opened her robe, so young and willing to trust. The moment I chose to fight back when Robert Modell was in my head- her eyes rimmed with tears as she begged me to be strong. The tickle of her hair to my cheek as we swung the baseball bat, over and over into the night- how close she was then, I could feel her rub against me and I never wanted it to stop. The look of stone on her face the night she shot Pfaster. All that pain, all those moments they all blurred together between sorrow and joy- I'd had a hand in it all.

And then the echo of her voice outside the building in Dallas, 'Mulder! There's no time!'

It brought me back to the present and I looked at my watch- no time. Scully still sobbed in my arms.

I grabbed her shoulders and shook her, forcing her to open her beautiful eyes to me.

"Scully I want you to listen to me. Hear me Scully." She nodded slowly. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all the pain and all the loss Scully- I really am truly sorry- but I'd be lying if I said we should have never met. I'd be lying."

"Mulder no." She pleaded, not wanting to say goodbye.

"Everyday I've had with you is still fresh to me. All the times you've laughed still feel like yesterday. I remember it all Scully. Your smell, your smile " I couldn't keep it together, "Oh God, I can't lose you!"

That's when it struck me. I was instantly crippled by the thought of never seeing her again, of missing the sensation of her wrapped with me like this. My mind reeled with anger and there was no one left to shout at. I had wasted so much time.

"I'm so sorry Scully." I couldn't help the waves of tears and we both collapsed against each other sobbing. "I love you- I love you so much and I never said so- never told you. I'm so sorry."

"Shh, Mulder Shh... I know, I've always known. It's been the same for me. I have loved you so long now, I can't remember when it really started. But there's no time left for us now." She touched my face gently as if trying not to frighten me. My skin burned at her caress and I ached to feel more- so much more.

I wanted to take hours learning her lips, weeks getting to know her body and spend years inside of her. I wanted to tell her that her mind was the most precious thing I'd ever known and that her smile, Oh God, her smile meant the world to me.

"Mulder "

"Under ten minutes Scully." I spoke as if reading her mind.

In a flash of colours her mouth pressed to mine, desperately. Her nails raked over my scalp and her legs tightened like a boa constrictor around my hips. She'd actually lifted herself from the desk as she kissed me. I responded with equal force.

She tasted sweet, like a dream, but the salt from our tears reminded me that despite the sweetness, our time was tainted with salty bitterness. I was choking. I couldn't manage to kiss and cry all at once and I had to break the contact to catch my breath.

"IloveyouScully, IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou... " It was the only feeling left in me- the only thing left I could say. I pushed her back until she lay on the desk with me between her legs. It felt so right but any sexual urges were replaced by my basic need to kiss her, feel her, just * be * with her.

Our mouths mated and her lips were as necessary as air to me. We twisted and clung and wept through each tic and toc, never breaking contact.

That's when it happened. I saw her look over my shoulder at the clock on the office wall. Her lips parted in a half-smile and she whispered.

"Never leave me."

In that split second, I felt myself leave the desk, leave my body in fact, as I traveled into her. I looked back at myself through her eyes for a glint in time, feeling all that I knew- all the truth of my feelings, alive in her. Alive.

The blast ripped through time and for a millisecond the room was set aglow. Then all went quiet. But in the vast silence and darkness that followed, I could hear the whisper song of her last words...

‘never leave me...’

FIN

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