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 Tool---"Lateralus"
I have a strange feeling the four horsemen of the apocalypse will soon be sighted coming over the horizon. This
is due to two strange and frightful things happening recently. One, OJ Simpson is backing Robert Blake. Good thing
this, since OJ is an expert on everything to do with an unresolved killing.
Two, Jennifer Lopez was named the most beautiful woman in the world by FMH magazine. I read a lot, yet have never
heard of this magazine, but that's not the point.
There are women that are more beautiful than J Blow. How about the blonde in the Dentyne Ice commercial? She makes
me pant like a dog left outside in 102-degree heat. She gets a vote from me.
Miss Cleo is another one. She's brilliant, knows how to use those tarot cards and is Jamaican to boot. What more
could you want?
Bel looks very good dressed up as a woman.
Quite beautiful, as a matter of fact.
That's what other women have told me at least. Not that I would ever have the hots for Bel, because some people
might think that is wrong.
Then there's that blonde that was driving the Toyota Celica on that road a couple of days ago. I would vote for
her too.
Even Melissa is better looking than Ms. P Diddy. Oh, wait they broke up. For now. And what does P Diddy mean? It
sounds like something a baby deposits in its diaper.
The magazine gave her a brand new Jaguar XKR for coming out on top. That's really nice, but I am curious to see
what she does with the car. A truly beautiful person would give it to someone less fortunate, like Bob who has
to drive around in a 1977 Pinto station wagon. Hell, she could even give it to a high school to be used in driver's
ed class.
I guess it doesn't matter though. She will eventually get old and the public will forget she ever existed, like
Jan Michael-Vincent.
And that's the way it goes.
COMING NEXT: I recite some Shakespeare.
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if you wanna give Stephen "A Good, Ass Whuppin."
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