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Ask Bob for 04/02/00 & 04/09/00

04/02/00

Ask Bob!

By "Bob Martines"

Q:
What's with this Weirdcrap? Where did you get the name and why do you bother?

A:
Good question, I can best answer your question with a song...

But I don't know one.

So just forget that first question, it's stupid.

The name came from an exhaustive think tank session between myself and "Jon," I mean "John." We thought and we thunk until we could hardly see or walk straight.

Well the spinning room effect may have been the result of all the beer we drank during the "think tank" session. As usual we came up "empty handed."

We still had no name.

Then by some miracle, I recieved an email.

A very special email.

It was sent to me by mistake, by someone I don't know, but it was just what we were looking for! Call it divine intervention, call it dumb luck.

The email had a baby monkee that put his finger in his butt, smelled it and fell off a tree. I wanted to display it with this article but for some reason I had trouble downloading it.

Perhaps in the future.

And now you know.

.04/09/00

04/09/00

Ask Bob!

By "Bob Martines"

Little Jimmy Baker writes:
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I am considering selling the fur from my duck-billed platypus because it seems to be the vogue thing to do and, quite frankly, I need the money.
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What should I do?

A:
Don't be ashamed of your financial hardships and don't start developing sympathy for small furry animals, and ugly ones at that!

Take a good size club and smack that duck-billed platypus on the head (aim careful so you don't ruin its fur) I recommend the Treadle Baby Seal Clubber used by Baby Seal clubbing aficionados everywhere.

Here's what one looks like...

To learn more about Clubbing Baby Seals for Fun and Profit...Click Here!

And now you know!