Snow White and the Eco-Disaster Dwarves
Theater Script
''Those are funny names. I thought you'd be named Bashful or Happy or Sneezy.''

by Jeannette Jaquish (c) 2013

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SET: The Forest
PROPS: Tree with a real apple hanging on it.


(SNOW WHITE walks into the forest)

SNOW WHITE - What happened to the forest? It is so quiet. No birds are singing. No squirrels or deer or rabbits playing. The trees are all brown and dying. And it stinks.


DWARVES - Hello! Who are you little girl?

SNOW WHITE - Oh, I'm Snow White. My wicked stepmother the Queen commanded the Huntsman to kill me in the forest but he let me go. I thought I might live here but the forest seems to be dying.

DWARVES - Dying? Hmm... Well I guess so. No flowers, no fruit, no butterflies. Just mud and sticks.

SNOW WHITE - Do you live here?

DWARVES - Yes we are the 3 Dwarves.

DIGGER - I'm Digger.
DUMPER - I'm Dumper.
CHOPPER - I'm Chopper Downer.

SNOW WHITE - Those are funny names. I thought you'd be named Bashful or Happy or Sneezy.

DIGGER - Oh, they moved out long ago.
DUMPER - Yeah, when the forest was still green.
CHOPPER - They left some nice furniture.

SNOW WHITE - Why did they leave?

DIGGER - I dug up their garden to search for minerals.
DUMPER - I dumped old tires and used motor oil into their pond.
CHOPPER - I chopped down all the tress around their house, to build better houses.

DWARVES - And then we built a mall on their land.

SNOW WHITE - That's terrible. The forest is ruined! Boo hoo. I can't live in this dump. Boo hoo hoo.

DIGGER & DUMPER - There there, don't cry little girl.
CHOPPER - Are you hungry?

SNOW WHITE - Yes, I'm very hungry. I've been walking all day.

CHOPPER - Look, that tree still has an apple on it. I must have missed it when I was chopping down all the trees
DUMPER - Why don't you eat it? Then you'll feel better .
DIGGER - Then we'll walk you to the mall and you can call someone.

SNOW WHITE - Thank you. A fresh apple would be delicious right now.
(Snow White bites the apple and falls down dead.)

DIGGER - What happened to her?
DUMPER - It must be a magic poison apple.
CHOPPER - Pull it out of her mouth!

(They do but she stays dead.)

DIGGER - She's still dead.
DUMPER - And there's no such thing as magic poison apples. That's just a fairy tale.
CHOPPER - Well how would a real apple kill her?

CHOPPER - Look! What are those leaking barrels next to the tree?
DIGGER - Dumper! Is that where you dumped that radioactive waste?
DUMPER - Ooops.

CHOPPER - Now I remember. That's why I didn't chop that tree down. It was looking at me.
DIGGER - Well what do we do now?
DUMPER - Are we in trouble?

(Snow White comes back to life as a zombie.)

SNOW WHITE - Brains! Brains! Brains!

DWARVES - She's a zombie! Run! (DWARVES EXIT)

SNOW WHITE (to audience) - Brains! Use 'em or Lose 'em! Don't destroy Nature! (EXITS.)

(DWARVES Re-ENTER running.)

DIGGER - Hurry! Hurry! She’s catching up.
DUMPER - Did you get it?
CHOPPER - Yes! I’ve got it right here. (Holds plastic container.)

DIGGER - Here she comes! Ready . . .

SNOW WHITE (ENTERS zombie-like) : Hungry. . . . (turns to face audience) Hungry. . .

DUMPER - Aim. . . (SNOW WHITE turns to face the dwarves, with her back to the audience, )

CHOPPER - Fire! (Throws imaginary little pill into Snow White’s mouth, or throws a handful of Skittles toward her and into the audience/ Snow White has her back to the audience and her mouth closed.)

SNOW WHITE: (stumble, gulp chew chew swallow. She turns human again.) What happened? How did you cure me?

CHOPPER - Flintstone’s Vitamins! (Shows container)

DIGGER - And now we are going to clean up this polluted mess!
DUMPER - And plant new trees.
CHOPPER - So the forest is alive and healthy again!

SNOW WHITE: What a happy forever after!

ALL - Hooray!


(NOTE: Do not throw a real candy or pill into Snow White’s open mouth or it could go down her throat and choke her. If you actually throw little candies, she should have her mouth closed and her back to the audience so they do not see that she does not eat one.)

Tree that can hold an apple
A real apple
Flintstone’s Vitamins container
Optional: Skittles – if you throw the pills
Elf Costumes
Snow White’s lost in the forest costume