Strange how things work out no? Chaos it seems. Random chance. And yet there I was, sitting over a year ago at my computer talking about a girl. Correction, a woman. A year ago and I was enraptured with her. Now I am sitting at my computer desk, quite cold because my window is open and talking to that same woman.

Strange how things work out no? I'm sitting alone, wishing that I had spent the New Year with someone, and I sit reminiscing. How strange that I, with a new set of friends, a new way of life, how strange that I would ask that woman if I were at all romantic during our relationship.

Strange how I can't even answer my own question. I don't know. I'd hoped that I was. But if she can't be sure, then whatever I did was not impressive enough to mark in her life "Hey, this guy did something really special for me". My only claim to fame is that I hurt someone totally devoted to me and that I could have repaired a bit of that damage if I had listened to my heart instead of other people.

It isn't strange however that I am too late in my apologies. I am too late in my expressions. If it's one thing I am used to, it is never being on time with anything.

I have been working at returning to the old romance locked away inside of me. Not many out there have the courage to believe in romance, not many would be willing to believe in romance in others. That is my resolve, to believe with my heart and wear it on my sleeve.