Each and every one of Michael's wall had been blown to kingdom come. Maria was sure of it. The fact that he had been crying in front of her only a short while ago was proof of that. To Michael, crying was a sign of weakness. And Michael Guerin wasn't someone to let another person see him weak like that. So Maria took the time to watch Michael when he was at his most vulnerable. Sleeping peacefully in her arms, tear tracks still wet on his cheeks.
"Sleep sweet, Michael. I'll keep you safe till morning," Maria whispered, lightly brushing the dampness from his cheeks with the pad of her thumb.
With that, Maria lowered her head down next to Michael's on the pillow, her arm around his waist as they laid with her chest pressed to his back. Michael shifted slightly, snuggling deeper into her arms. Maria held him easily, wanting to give Michael as much comfort as possible. For Michael to have actually been reduced to tears, something must have hurt him very badly. At that moment, Maria wanted to hunt down and destroy whatever or whoever had hurt Michael so much.
Unable to do that, Maria consigned herself to the inevitable and fell asleep.
It was the sound of the annoying sparrow who liked to wake her up with his incessant chirping at the crack of dawn that brought Maria back into reality. At first she remembered nothing of what had happened the night before. The feel of a warm body under her arm brought it all back. He must have moved some time during the night because when she opened her eyes, Maria found herself looking into the tortured depths of Michael's eyes.
"Hello," Michael croaked, his voice still hoarse from his sobbing the night before.
"`Morning, Spaceboy," Maria whispered, reaching out to smooth the rumpled hair from Michael's eyes. She didn't even want to consider what her hair looked like at that point. "Did you sleep okay?"
"Better than I can ever remember," Michael admitted, staring intently at her face. "Thank you."
Maria could feel herself blush slightly under the intensity of Michael's gaze. "What can I say, the drowned puppy dog look does me in every time. I couldn't very well leave you out there to catch hypothermia or something."
I'm glad that you decided to let me in. I feel safe with you," Michael told her, his eyes never leaving her face as he spoke.
It made Maria smile to learn that Michael felt safe with her. She knew that Michael was pretty messed up emotionally-- being one of three aliens on earth, with a terrible home life to boot, would do that to a person -- and knew that it would take a lot for him to admit something like that. Her smile broadened when Michael slipped an arm around her waist, pulling her body closer to his.
"Do you want to talk about what happened?" Maria asked softly, moving her fingers from his hair down to stroke his cheek lightly.
Michael let out a deep breath, his eyes falling shut for a moment. When he opened them, Maria could see the acceptance in his eyes. A reluctant type, but acceptance nonetheless.
"If they had just minded their own business, none of it would have happened," Michael grumbled, rolling onto his back. He kept his face turned towards hers, though. His dark eyes trained on her green ones. "Everything would have just gone back to normal, you know?"
"Assuming that it's Max and Isabel we're talking about, what exactly did they do?" Maria inquired, propping herself up on one elbow so that she was staring down at Michael's reclined form.
Biting nervously at his bottom lip, Michael looked up at Maria's face. "They, um.... Well, between the two of them, they managed to destroy my only chance at a normal life. Thought they were being all righteous and saving me when, in fact, they ruined it all."
Maria could hear the pain in Michael's voice as tears filled his eyes for the second time in less than a day. And, like the night before, Maria knew that there was nothing she could say that would make it better for Michael. All that she could do was be there for him when he needed her. Hold him. Comfort him. Be his rock when things got tough.
"Is it too much to ask that I get a father who gives a damn about me?" Michael demanded, swiping furiously at his eyes to keep the tears at bay. "It's not like I've ever asked for much. I just want a home. One that doesn't involve sleeping over at Max's when things get rough. Or where I have to stay away till late at night in case my bastard of a father is home. But no. Because Max and Isabel can't leave well enough alone, I don't even have that anymore. I have nothing, Maria. Absolutely nothing."
Until he said her name, Maria had been almost completely certain that Michael had forgotten her presence completely.
"You have me," Maria said quietly. "You'll always have me. And Max and Isabel and Liz and Alex. We're all here for you, Michael. Now and always."
This time, Michael didn't try to stop the tear that slid down his cheek, leaving a glittering trail in its wake. "Why? I treat you guys all like shit, but you're still here. Why haven't you given up on me like everyone else in this godawful town?" p>"Maybe because we all care about you. Because we all love you," Maria murmured, gently wiping away his tears.
"But I'm no one. You shouldn't be wasting your time on someone as worthless as me," Michael said dejectedly.
Maria's featured hardened the instant those words left Michael's mouth. "Don't you ever say something like that, Michael Guerin," she hissed, cupping his cheek in the palm of his hand and turning his head so that he was forced to meet her eyes. "Never. You're worth something, Michael. I wouldn't have let you through my window if you weren't. You're Michael Guerin. That's something. Don't you ever let anyone try to convince you otherwise. Got it, Spaceboy?"
"If I'm so special, how come I'm the one who got stuck with Hank? How come Max and Isabel got the perfect life? What did I do that was so terrible that got me stuck in this hell of an existence?" Michael demanded, his voice thick with emotion.
"Maybe the Powers That Be thought that you would be the one who was strong enough to last as long as you have," Maria suggested, her fingers absently playing with some of the longer strands of Michael's hair.
"I'm not strong," Michael lamented brokenly. "I'm weak. I can't do it anymore. I'm just so very tired."
Maria gave him a reassuring smile as she leaned over to place a light kiss on his forehead. "No one said that you had to do this all on your own, Michael. You've still got the rest of us and we'll fight for you when you can't anymore. We're not going to lose you, Michael."
"You make it sound like I'm dying," Michael snorted, some of his old cynicism peeking through.
"Maybe a part of you is," Maria said with a shrug. She laid back down next to Michael, wiggling around to get herself comfortable, before slipping her arm back around his waist. "I read in a book of my mother's once that when you give up in here--" Maria tapped his head. "-- or here--" This time she placed her hand over his heart. "-- that you're as good as dead anyway because the very essence of your existence is gone."
"In English please," Michael prompted.
Keeping her hand pressed over his heart, Maria whispered, "Your spirit is dead. You pretty much become a walking zombie."
They were both silent after that. Maria could tell that Michael was thinking about what she had just said. She could practically see the wheel turning in his head and was glad for it. Maria didn't want a zombie Michael. She wanted a normal Michael. She wanted the Michael that she fought with. The Michael that put his friends' well being above his own. The Michael that fought so hard to express himself in ways that other people found so easy. The Michael that never gave up even when the odds were stacked completely against him completely. She wanted her Michael. Plain and simple. The Michael that she loved and cared about. The one who held her heart in the palm of his hand even if he didn't know it half of the time.
"Now I'm not going to say what Max and Isabel did was smart-- I don't even know what they did for that matter -- but I do know that they had your best interests at heart," Maria told him, her voice soft and calming. "They love you just as much as I do and only want what's best for you. They only want you to be happy."
Michael let his eyes fall shut as though he were trying to block out the world. "Whether they meant well or not, it doesn't change the fact that I have nowhere to go anymore. Hank knows what I am. I used my powers to keep him away from Isabel and now he thinks I'm a freak.... All the money in the world wouldn't make him keep me anymore."
"Oh, Michael," Maria practically sobbed.
"Doesn't matter, though, does it? I've always wanted out of this town and now I have my chance. I can leave now and never come back," Michael said, trying to sound indifferent even though Maria could hear the pain in his voice loud and clear.
"If you think I'm going to let you disappear without a trace, you've got another thing coming, buddy," Maria stated, jabbing him in the middle with her index finger. "In case you missed it back there, I said that I loved you. That means I'm not about to let you leave any time soon. You're stuck with me, Michael Guerin."
For the first time that morning, Michael flashed her a genuine smile. "Is that so, little pixie? And what's going to keep me here when all I want to do is hop on the next bus out of here."
"Me," Maria said confidently, practically daring him to contradict her.
Instead of rolling his eyes or turning away like Maria expected him to do, Michael did something that she never would have though he'd do in a million years. Michael gave her what was probably the sweetest smile she had ever seen then curled himself up in her arms and shut his eyes.
"If it's all the same to you, right now I just want to sleep for a little while," Michael whispered, sounding as though he was already half asleep.
With a smile of her own, Maria pressed a kiss to the top of Michael's head and settled herself down to get some more sleep. Seeing Michael go through such a vast array of emotions had thrown her for a loop. Until the night before, Maria had been almost completely sure that Michael didn't have a softer side. Granted, she knew he had every reason to keep himself guarded, but to see Michael so open had shocked her to no end.
Still trying to process the fact that Michael had let her see him so open and vulnerable, Maria didn't even want to begin trying to figure out why he had come to her. Even knowing that Max and Isabel were the reason that Michael was in this situation, she would have expected him to go to them. If only because they were the closest thing that Michael had to family.
But he hadn't gone to them.
Michael had come to her. When he needed someone to shelter him from the rain. To hold him and let him cry without asking any questions. To just have someone to be there for him. Michael had come to her. Maria hadn't forced him to, he had come of his own free will. And while it still shocked her to no end, Maria was glad that Michael felt safe enough to trust her when he was like that.
"Whatever am I going to do with you, Michael?" Maria mumbled, more to herself than anyone else, as she began combing her fingers through Michael's hair. She could remember her mother doing the same thing to her when she was younger. After her father had left and she had trouble falling asleep. Her mother had just held her and stroked her hair until all the bad thoughts went away and she was able to sleep peacefully.
Already thinking that Michael was asleep, Maria certainly hadn't expected him to answer her question.
"You can love me just as much as I love you."
And, for one moment, all seemed right in the world.