Trapped Behind the Looking Glass

This is a look at a day in the life of Alexis as seen from both her and Sonny‘s POV. Alexis still lives in penthouse #2, Sonny is still oblivious to the fact that she is carrying his child and Carly is still just as bitchy.

6:00 am slip out of bed before Carly wakes up. As if she has ever opened her eyes before 10:00 anyway. Quickly shower, shave and get dressed. Use my key to let myself into penthouse #2 and wait for Alexis to come downstairs.

7:00 am Wake up to find Sonny waiting in my living room to go over contracts. Lightly scold him for breaking and entering. Remind him my time is valuable and I can’t always be at his beckon call. Admit to myself that I'm ecstatic to see him. Kick his butt out when he starts to whine about Carly.

7: 00 am This woman is wonderfully predictable. She scolds me for letting myself in and tells me her time is valuable. I know that secretly she is happy to see me. I can see the joy in her eyes when she comes downstairs and sees me sitting on the couch. If I really believed that it bothered her I would stop coming over. The truth of the matter is even after all this time and after all we mean to each other Alexis and I are still dancing with the true depth of our feelings for each other. These morning meetings over coffee contracts are a part of that dance. This connects us and we need this as sure as we need oxygen to breath. It took me a long time to convince her to work for me as my lawyer and it took even longer for her to open up to me and trust me as a friend. Alexis and I are very much alike in that way. We do not trust easily and it is even harder for us to open up to a person and allow them into our hearts. However, once they are in our hearts there is no turning back. I can not remove her from my life or my heart and I know she feels the same way about me. Alexis and I love the exact same way.

7:30 am If I could manage it, I would kick myself hard on the backside. Things were going so well between me and Alexis then I had to go and ruin it by mentioning something that Carly did. I knew the extent of my mistake the instant her name spilled forth from my lips. Alexis can insist until the day she dies that it does not bother her that I am with Carly, but I know Alexis and I know it does bother her. Her body changes when I mention Carly. The she becomes all business like. Now, for the most part, I love Alexis when she is in full business mode. She is cute when she is trying to be serious. Especially when it is a reaction to my teasing her about being too serious! But, I know she is just trying to shut me out when she goes into business mode in reaction to my mentioning something about Carly. That hurts me, it hurts me very deeply. Mostly because I know that Alexis is hurting as well. I am always afraid that I will hurt her more if I stay. So, I leave. Only I do not really leave. I stand outside her door and linger and wonder if I can really feel her standing on the other side, needing me as much as I need her.

8:00 am Walk to bakery and buy chocolate éclairs to satisfy second trimester cravings for chocolate. Think of Chloe. Look both ways before I cross the street. Double check before I cross the street.

8:05 am I wait until I hear the elevator arrive and depart. I make my way into the hall and stop a moment to inhale her lingering scent. The smell of her newly washed hair lingers with the fragrance of her perfume. Gardenias! I wonder if she always smelled like Gardenias or is she started to use that scent after we returned from Puerto Rico. If she always used it, I never noticed before. There are a lot of things about Alexis that I have only recently noticed. The way her bangs fall in soft wisps just about her beautiful chocolate eyes. The way her dimples peak out like a shy child when she smiles. The way that her lips turned up in a frustrated pout has the power to lift my sprits.

8:30 am Stop at Whyndams to buy a bigger briefcase to hide second trimester spread.

8:30 am Try to recover after watching Alexis eat chocolate cream puffs at the bakery. More on that later, because if I think about it too much I am going to be late for court and I will miss Alexis defending me on some trumpeted up charges.

9:00 am Arrive at court house to defend Sonny against trumpeted up charges. Remind myself that I’m happy being his lawyer and friend. Hope the harpy isn’t with him. Give Sonny sizzling looks across the court room when he arrives, thankfully without the old ball and chain in tow.

9:00 am Arrive at the courthouse and watch as Alexis gives me very sultry looks across the courtroom.

She wants me, I can see it in her beautiful eyes. Try and hide my panic as I realize that she really really wants me!

10:30 am Wipe the floor with Dara in court. Leave new, bigger briefcase in the aisle so she trips over it on the way out. Just to add injury to insult. Stifle a laugh as the judge and everyone else looks on. Drop a hint to Sonny by asking him if my new suit makes me look fat? Roll eyes when the question shoots right over his head. Will someone please give this man a dollar so he can buy a clue?

10:30 am Alexis wiped the floor with Dara and then just to add injury to insult, she left her brief case where Dara would fall over it. Alexis is noting short of a miracle. The way she defends me with such ease leaves me in awe. She waves her hands and the charges disappear. He beautiful, magical hands. The things she can do with those hands when she is between a set of satin sheets is nothing sort of a miracle as well.

11:30 am Early lunch at the Grill with Ned. Cry on his shoulder because I‘m feeling fat and I‘m afraid my child will hate me for keeping it from its father. Try to avoid death stare from my sister Kristina. Remind myself that I can do this alone and that I am really happy having this child with our without the father.

11:30 am Alexis is having lunch with Ashton at the Grill. I heard her talking to him on her cell phone in the courthouse hallway. I was going to ask her to have lunch with me, but he asked her first. I am not jealous though. The hell I’m not jealous! What does he have that I don’t, besides Alexis for lunch that is?

12:00 pm Breath!

12:00 pm Carly calls and demands that I take her out to lunch. I smugly insist on going to the Grill!

12:03 pm On the way out of the Grill run into Sonny and Carly who are arriving for lunch. Remind myself to be nice. Use several two syllable words while talking to Sonny. Desperately try not to laugh as I watch Carly as her mind starts to melt down trying to figure out the meaning of the words. Flirt with Sonny while Carly has her back is turned.

12:03 pm Alexis actually asked me earlier if her new suit made her look fat? Does this woman realize how beautiful she is? She has curves that go from here to next Tuesday. Of course, seeing her in one of those buttoned up suits makes me think about what she looks like out of the suit. I no longer see the lawyer in the suit, I see the woman in the black lace slip underneath the suit. There is something different about her though. I just can not put my finger on what it is at the moment. Whatever it is, it is making her more beautiful. I wonder if she ate lunch. Maybe she has an eating disorder. No, then she wouldn’t eat chocolate cream puffs. What if that is all she eats now, that and popcorn of course? What if the bakery closes and Alexis starves?

12:30 I pretended to listen to what Carly was saying during lunch. She kept droning on and on about how Jax stole the club and gave it to the skank Skye. I wanted to point out that Jax did put the money up for her to start the club and she did steal $100,000. Actually, I could have cared less what Carly was saying. All I could think about was the cream puff bakery closing and Alexis starving. Now I know for sure what I have to do. First I have to get rid of Carly though.

1:00 pm Thank God Lunch is over. Carly and I went for a walk on the docks. I considered killing Carly and tossing her body in the water, but decide against it for the moment. Alexis told me she would never defend me against murder charges. I am sure she would make an exception where Carly is concerned, but I am not certain. Why risk loosing Alexis forever just to get rid of Carly?

1:30 Left Carly at the dancing fountain in the park. Water shoots up from the ground in random patterns. That always keeps her happy and entertained for hours. Now I need to tend to business, namely making sure that Alexis will always have all the cream puffs she can eat.

4:00 pm I bought a bakery! Not just the contents, the whole thing. Every brick, window, shelf and bag of flour in the place now belongs to Michael J Corinthos Jr. This is not just any bakery mind you, it is her bakery. The one that Alexis visits every morning. Now, she will never have to live without cream puffs! More to the point, now I will not have to live without watching her eat cream puffs. Alexis is a sexy woman, but the she eats cream puffs is just down right sensual. She just goes for it, devouring the things whole while making these erotic moaning sounds and arousing exclamations! She pretty much treats life the same way and it is extremely sexy. She just kind of digs in and does not let go. Lets just say that I am living vicariously through a pastry, but at least such feelings keep me alive. The feelings I am having right now just thinking about it remind me of the feelings she stirred in me the morning after we first made love. When she was eating that strawberry. She thought I was teasing her, but if she knew the truth about how much she turns me on, she would probably run screaming from my life.

4:30 pm Visit Jax at the lake house. Ask him to make me one of his famous protein drinks, which I’m sure is healthy for the baby. Take one sip, kill jade plant, which belongs to Skye, by dumping remainder of protein drink when Jax turns his back.

4:30 pm I lost track of Alexis because I had to go home and take a cold shower after thinking about her eating cream puffs. It did not come close to working.

5:00 pm Stop at Kelly’s for cheese burger, fries and chocolate shake to wash away protein drink aftertaste. Grab another chocolate shake to take home.

5:00 pm The shower did nothing to cool my desire for Alexis. Luckily Carly came home from the park and that was enough to cool me off. I had forgotten completely about her watching the fountains. For some reason she did not seem to care. She just started whining about how Jax stole the club from her and gave it to that barracuda Skye. I shut her up by promising to take her there tonight. At least it will get my mind off of Alexis for a few hours.

5:30 pm While riding up to my penthouse in the elevator fantasize about having an erotic encounter with Sonny in said elevator.

I ask Carly if she picked Michael up from school at 3:30. She forgot, I guess she was too distracted to by the dancing fountains.

5:33 pm Push the stop button on the elevator in order to finish fantasy. Decide that fantasizing about having sex with Sonny is almost as good as the real thing.

5:33 pm Carly races out to go get Michael. I bet she comes back without him though. Anyway, it allows me a quiet moment to myself to fantasize about making love to Alexis. I am sitting on the couch and she Alexis walks in the door wearing a trench coat. She pulls it open to reveal a sort, black, little lacy number and black stockings. Her hair is pulled loosely up on top of her head and her lips and cheeks are flushed. I know I have a Madonna/Whore complex, but this is my fantasy! She gives me a sultry look and goes to the kitchen to cook me a gourmet meal. Hey, I said this was my fantasy! So sue me! I have a really good lawyer who is an expert at getting me off! Boy does she ever know how to get me off!

6:03 pm Find very angry Carly waiting for the elevator on the penthouse level. It seems she has been waiting for the elevator for 30 minutes! I guess she has never heard of taking the stairs. Ask her this very same question in Pig Latin. Watch as the remainder of her brains ooze out her ears. Consider pushing Carly down the elevator shaft. Decide against it for the moment. Give her my very melted chocolate shake as a peace offering.

6:03 pm This fantasy is really starting to get good. I am sitting on the couch. Alexis has slowly undressed me and is straddling me while she feeds me strawberries by hand. In between bites we kiss and run our hands over each others bodies. She gives me cream puff kisses, if you know what I mean and I am pretty sure you know what I mean. Alexis is doing a lot of that exclaiming that I love so much. There is a plate of those wonderful pastries sitting near by and Alexis is reaching for one. Alexis has talents that never manifest them selves in the court room. It is all in the hands with her. Well, maybe her hands and her mouth as well. I have never asked her where she developed these talents, but I am pretty sure that she never used them on Ashton. If she had, he would have never let her run out of his life. The morning after we made love I told her she was a revelation. Just when things are really about to get interesting in my fantasy, I hear a high pitched shrill coming from the hallway near the elevator. The sound of Carly’s voice completely breaks my concentration and ruins the fantasy. She has to be yelling at Alexis, because she does not use that tone with anyone else.

6:05 pm Wait in the hallway until Sonny comes out of his penthouse. Give him a very sultry look, then close the door in his face.

6:05 pm Two minutes later when I am sure that Carly is gone I step out into the hall. Alexis stands there and gives me this very sexy look. Then she turns on her heel, goes into her apartment and slams the door in my face! I have half the mind to knock on her door and when she refuses to let me in to just use my pass key and open it myself. Then make it crystal clear to her that I want to make wild, passionate love to her for the next 12 or so hours. I would have done that, if my cell phone had not rung at that very moment. It was Michael's school calling to let me know that he had been sent home with one of his teachers. If I did not pick him up in 20 minutes they would report his mother Leticia to the police for child abandonment. Leticia as Michael’s mother, that is a funny thought. I could hardly let Leticia go to jail just because Carly had gotten distracted at the park. Or cold I? If Leticia was arrested, Alexis would have to go down and defend her and I would get to see Alexis in action. I smile crosses my face at the thought, but I decide against it for the moment.

6:10 pm Breath! Then give the little one a pep talk about how much we love daddy even though he can be an obtuse pain in the butt most of the time.

6:10 The elevator still smells like gardenias, even though Carly was the last person in it. I wonder if Carly notices the scent. Probably not, at least I hope not. This is something I do not want to share with Carly. She once bought a bottle of gardenia scented perfume. I lied and told her I was allergic to Gardenias. I did not want to associate them with anyone but Alexis.

7: 00 pm Get sick and tired of being cooped up in the penthouse alone. Put on a pair of black flare legged pants and a black halter top. Look for a pair of flats, decide on sandals. Thank god that my second trimester body looks really hot in a halter top. At least I have something going for me! Head for Club 101.

Listen to a lecture by Michael’s teacher about punctuality and responsibility. I try to explain that today was Leticia’s day off and that it will not happen again. The thought crosses my mind that if Alexis were the boy’s mother this would never happen. I imagine Alexis pregnant with my child and being a mother. The teacher scolds me for not paying attention. I feel like I am back in grade school.

7:30 pm Loose track of how many men offer to buy me drinks since I walked in the door. Maybe the second trimester of a pregnancy and a halter top are not such a good mix after all.

7:30 pm Take Michael to Kelly’s for a burger and fries and a chocolate milk shake. Try and explain to him why Carly never spends any time with him. Fail miserably.

8:00 pm Nikolas and Gia arrive saving me from having to threaten to sue half the room for sexual harassment.

8:30 pm Pretend to be interested as Gia drones on about the problems of being a top supermodel and the future wife of a prince. Refrain from asking exactly when the wedding will take place. Make a mental note to sneak over to Whyndamere and loosen the railing on the parapet and then use promises of presents from my nephew to lure Gia to her death.

8:30 pm On way to Club 101 with Carly. Listen to her drone on and on about one insipid topic after another. Jax and Skye are arriving just as we show up. There is bound to be some kind of a conflict. I prepare for the worst.

8:35 pm Meet Carly, Sonny, Jax and Skye coming into the club as I’m leaving. Wonder for a moment why they are coming in together. Catch Sonny checking me out in my halter top. Physically reach up and close his gaping mouth. Wink at Carly. Scrap Jax off of the floor.

8:35 pm As we are going in, Alexis was going out. This diffused the tension between Carly and Skye. It also created a new tension for me. Alexis was barley wearing a halter top that perfectly showcased some of her most appealing assets. My jaw must have dropped straight down to the floor because I vaguely recall Alexis reaching up with one of those beautiful hands and closing it for me. I have got to love that woman, she is always taking care of me. I am usually the type of man that has control over his urges, but seeing Alexis sent me over the edge.

9:00 pm Return home. Have another chat with the little one. Remind him or her that we are happy and we can do this on our own. We are strong and independent.

9:00 pm I can’s stop thinking about Alexis. Of course it doesn’t help that just about everyman in the club is talking about her. I want to kill everyone of them for disrespecting her, but that little “no defense on murder charges” rule that Alexis has keeps holding me back.

9:30 pm Go over coffee contracts in order to be ready when Sonny shows up first thing tomorrow morning. Go over briefs. Get ready to go to court in the morning. This time it is about Jason. Sonny will be there though, he is always there. If I thought he cared I would suspect that he has his boys get into to trouble just so I would have to defend him. That is what I would think if I suspected Sonny cared.

9:30 pm Alexis is probably home going over contracts for tomorrow morning. I can see her sitting on the couch with papers all around her. Those cute little glasses perched on her nose and serious expression in her eyes. She has briefs to go over as well in order to get ready for court tomorrow. This time it is for Jason, who is being charged with disturbing the peace. I will be there of course. I am always there, just to see her for a few brief moments every day. Without Carly or Ned being around. Carly never goes to the courthouse, thank God! To many bad memories. Also, she hates to see Alexis is lawyer mode. It reminds Carly of everything that Alexis is and she can never hope to be. Strong, capable, intelligent and the list the goes on. Alexis would never allow Ned to be there either. For the same reasons, Ned is not comfortable with that side of Alexis. I guess he wants her to a docile, dependent, damsel in distress. If Ned is waiting to be her hero, he is going to has a long wait. I wonder if Alexis has figured out that I have my boys get into trouble just so she has to go to court and defend them? Of course she has figured it out. Did I mention that she is the smartest person I know? She doesn’t need anyone to point out the obvious to her and she doesn’t need a man to ride to her rescue. So what happen when me and my boys run out of reasons for her to ride to our rescue?

11:00 pm Have another talk with the little one. Tell him or her that even though we are happy, sometimes it is alright to cry. Cry myself to sleep.

11:00 pm Carly is upstairs and hopefully she is asleep. When we got home there was a message from Alexis saying that she had coffee contracts for me to go over in the morning. Yes, she is wonderfully predictable. I will be waiting for her in her apartment at 7:30 in the morning. I think I will stop by the bakery and pick up the cream puffs before I go over though. Maybe tomorrow I will tell Alexis how much I really care about her. Maybe I will tell her that I live for watching her in court, that I bought a bakery just for her and that she is the only part of my mixed up life that makes any sense. Maybe I will tell her that I am in love with her and that I dream about her returning my love. Maybe I will tell her tomorrow, but probably won’t. It is safer not to tell her. It is safer not to let her get to close. Do I fear that she doesn’t love me? You bet I do! I fear her rejection, but it goes deeper than fearing that my love for her is unrequited. There are parts of my life that are so ugly and dark that I fear Alexis would be repulsed if she ever caught sight of them. It is safer for both of us if I keep Alexis at a distance. I will never be worthy of Alexis, she is to good for me and 95% of the men in this world. She is much to good for Ashton, that is for sure. Alexis is my savior, but to wish for anything else is to wish for too much. I look up at the top of the stairs and see Carly waiting for me to come to bed. I hoped she would be asleep by now, but I am not that lucky. She is angry because of the message from Alexis, but what can I do? I was with Carly once tonight and it left me feeling miserable. I couldn’t get Alexis out of my mind while Carly and I were at the club. Carly still had a key to the club office and she suggested that we take advantage of the office desk. I had all of this pent up sexual tension over Alexis. So I took Carly up on her offer. It was vile and disgusting and I felt dirty after we did it. Sometimes I wonder who the whore really is in that Madonna/Whore complex. Is it really Carly or is it me? Carly disappears back into the bedroom and I pour myself a scotch, then another and another. Until all my senses begin to dull and I feel numb all over. No thoughts or desires exist. I find my way to the couch and collapse into darkness. I live for 7:30 am the next morning, but at least I have a reason to live.