Alexis Has No Valentine. Then She Has Too Many
Last year a bunch of us wrote our version of how Alexis should spend V-day and I had so much fun reading what everyone came up with. This year, it looks like Alexis will not get much of a V-day and I think that is just wrong. So I am giving her an almost too good valentines day. She deserves it! Only I am a little short on time so I will have to post the conclusion later. Alexis is not the nut in this story, it is the men in her life who crave her attention and it is making them a little nutty!
7 Nut Assortment: An Alexis V-day story
Alexis was ready to settle in for the night and try and forget what day it was.
"February 14th, who deemed that the national day of love anyway?"
Alexis scoffed as she thumbed through the TV Guide. She was disappointed to find only very sappy made for TV movies were on.
"So what if I am a little short on sweethearts this year! I hardly need a man in order to feel fulfilled, or massage my tired feet or tell me I am special."
She picked up a magazine and idly flipped though it. She only found articles about making your love life better and stories about reunited high school sweethearts. She throws it down in disgust.
"I am an independent, woman of the 21rst century! I can spend February 14th alone. I do not need to be showered with flowers, which would only make me sneeze! Who needs a box of candy shaped like a heart. Most candy has nuts and I hate nuts! Besides, chocolate is so unhealthy!"
She picked up a science magazine and read an article about the health benefits of chocolate. She groaned and threw the magazine down in frustration. She had ordered take out from Han’s House of Wontons. She expected to open the door and see the little delivery boy holding a box of sweet and sour pork. What she finds instead is Zander, holding a paper heart made out of pink construction paper and a chain of paper lace
"Zander, what are you doing here?" Alexis asked him as she gave him a sincere smile.
He looked a little embarrassed as he held the home made card out to Alexis.
"Happy Valentines Day, Alexis."
"Zander, did you make this yourself?" She beamed happily.
"Yea I hope you like it." He blushed a little.
"I love it! No one has ever made me a homemade Valentine before." She replied excitedly. It was the truth, no one had even presented her with such an honest expression of their feelings before.
"Well, I thought maybe you would be my Valentine, Alexis. Emily called me and told me that she is coming home, but since she is not here right now I am kind of lacking a Valentine." He blushed again as Alexis took the card from his hands.
"I would be honored to be you Valentine. I think it is great that Emily is coming home." She assured him and indicated for him to come inside the apartment.
"I think it is great too!" Zander beamed happily. "I have more to say to you Alexis." He hesitated for a moment.
"I am having Chinese take out sent over . Would you like to stay and eat with me, Valentine?" She gently teased, hoping to set him at ease.
"I wish I could stay, but I really came over to tell you I am sorry for the way I have treated you these past few months. After Carly faked her own death I felt guilty and confused. I took it out on you Alexis and I had no right to do that. You have done so much for me and my feeling for you run so much deeper than the cheap infatuation I had with Carly. Can you find it in your heart to forgive me, Alexis?"
He was practically in tears and there was not doubt in her mind that he was 100% genuinely sincere.
"Zander, of course I forgive you." She gave him a sincere, mothering look and wanted very much to hug him, but she could see the relief on his face. She was about to tell him that she understood how romantic feelings, even when they were misplaced and ill conceived, could cloud a person’s judgment. She did not get the chance however, because there was another knock on the door.
"That is probably the Chinese food." Alexis announces, over her shoulder, as she walks to the door.
Once again, she expects to find her dinner, once again she is surprised to find out she is wrong. She opens the door to her nephew, Nikolas.
"Nikolas, hi, I didn’t expect to see you tonight." She hugged her relative and tried to keep disappointment out of her voice and off of her face. After all she was getting kind of hungry.
Nikolas was about to say one thing, then he looked around the room and his eyes fell on Zander. Their gazes locked and the blood ruining through the veins of both of the young men started to boil.
"What is he doing here?" Nikolas demanded. He not only saw Zander as a nuseicne, he saw him as a threat to his relationship with his aunt .
Zander stood up and flexed his jaw and shook his head.
"Alexis, I don’t want any trouble. I am just going to leave! We can have that take out another night." Zander made for the door. If there was one thing in the world Alexis hated more than anything else it was male posturing. She was not going to stand it in her own apartment, not even if it started with her beloved relative.
"Zander, you have to stay. You are my Valentine." Alexis insisted and tired to block his exit. Nikolas looked like he might pop a vein.
"I thought I could be you Valentine, Alexis." Nikolas insisted. Alexis was taken slightly aback and Zander got a knowing smirk on his face.
"Unless you feel that you are only entitled to have one Valentine?"
Her nephew asked as he reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small ornately wrapped box. He made sure to knock the box against his jacket pocket in order to knock lose the card that was addressed to Gia.
Alexis eyed the box with suspicion.
"You brought me a gift?" She asked as she unwrapped the box to reveal a ruby incrusted Faberge egg. Alexis gasped and Zander nearly fell off the couch.
"This was one of my favorites when I was growing up." Alexis excitedly told both of the boys.
"Well, you are my favorite aunt after all." Nikolas beamed as he shot Zander a triumphant grin.
"I also came here to apologize to Alexis." Was Zander’s reply.
Nikolas thought for a moment.
"I came to apologize as well. Alexis I am so sorry for not supporting you more after you had Kristina. I should have come to see you right away. I should have been by your side when you were in labor. You are really the only family that I have left and from now on, the two of you will come first in my life. Alexis, you are the smartest and bravest person I know and I will support your choices regarding how and with whom you raise your daughter. Can you forgive me for momentarily losing faith in you?" Nikolas looked at her with eyes full of sincerity.
"Wow, two apologies in one night and two Valentines to boot! How much more lucky can I get tonight?" Alexis beamed as she hugged Nikolas. She saw him instantly relax.
Just then she heard another knock at the door.
"Maybe I can get more lucky. This has to be dinner!" She happily threw the door open, prepared to embrace the delivery boy. She almost threw it closed once more though when she saw it was not the Chinese take out and it was not even Lucky Spencer.
"Luke! What do you want?" Alexis scowled.
"Now, now Natasha, is that anyway to greet your Valentine." Luke swaggered in the door without being invited.
"I have enough Valentines." Alexis rolled her eyes and indicated the boys.
"You can never have enough Valentines." Luke mused as he flopped down on the couch.
"Unless you come bearing a gift or you are here to apologize, you can get out!" She points to the hallway.
Luke sprints out and comes back right away carrying a large stuffed bear with a banner that reads: "Be Mine Forever." He plunks it down on Alexis’ lap.
"I am still waiting for an apology!" Alexis demanded.
Luke thought and thought and thought, but nothing came. He looked at Zander, but the but shrugged his shoulders. Then he looked at Nikolas.
"Tash, I am terribly sorry that your father happened to be one of my biggest enemies. I think we could have some real fun if we ever got together in a carnal fashion. Since you are a Cassadine though, I can never see that happening. I could never thrust you. I might waked up in the morning with a knife sticking out of my back.
Luke gave the room a proud smile. It was almost as if he expected applause or a pat on the back. Alexis frowned. Luke thought for a few more moments.
"Won’t you please be my Valentine?"
He continued. Alexis just shook her head in disappointment. She looked up at the now open door and saw Ned and Jax standing in the hallway with bemused expressions on their faces. Jax was holding two vases of roses and Ned was holding a guitar.
"Now I get it, you are all playing a joke on me. I suppose to two of you want to be my Valentines as well?"
She gave them a look that indicated that she was not amused.
"As a matter of fact we do." Jax answered as he handed her the vases of flowers.
"I wrote you a song, would you like to hear it?" Ned gave her an infatuated schoolboy grin.
"Not now!" Alexis snapped and made Ned jump back several feet. A wounded look crossed his face.
Alexis turned and glared at Luke.
"This had to be your idea. Only you are twisted enough to come up with an idea like this on Valentines Day! I can just hear you going over your plan in your head Luke! Poor little Natasha is all alone with no man to romance her. I know, I will get together every man who has ever done her wrong. We will ambush her at her apartment, pretend we are sorry for all our wrong doings, lavish her with gifts and then pull the rug out from under her and admit it was all a joke."
She floped down on the couch and crossed her arms in disgust.
"Great plan Tash, only I didn’t come up with it." Luke answers honestly.
"Why would I put in with Luke to do that to my favorite aunt?" Nikolas questioned her.
"I made that heart myself and my apology was sincere" Zander responded with hurt in his eyes.
"That is what I forgot." Jax smacked himself on the forehead. My apology.
Jax takes her hands in his and looks right into her eyes.
"Alexis, you are my favorite ex wife. However, you are more. You are my best friend and the woman I admire most in the world. I trust you and although I may not always see eye to eye with you on every subject. Your input and support is one of the most valuable things I have in my pitiful life. I know I have not acted this way recently. The minute Brender came back in my life my brain headed south for the winter. I became obsessed with her and I forgot all about the one person who I know I will always be able to count on, you Alexis. My brain has since returned from vacation and I promise you that if you allow me to be your friend again, I will never forsake what we have for anything else ever again." He gave her a questioning look, but one filled with hope. He had Alexis in tears by the end of his speech.
"Right now, I could care less if Luke put you up to this or not, Jax. That is the sweetest thing anyone was ever said to me." She wiped her tears away and gave Jax a gentle kiss on the cheek.
"Yea, real sweet! I guess that is why they call him Candy Boy." A voice called from the doorway.
Alexis looked up to see Sonny leaning against the doorframe with a huge smile on his face. He looked relaxed, he looked good. Alexis had to fight some deep set primal urge to rip his clothes off and take him against the hall wall. It made know sense, but primal urges rarely were based in logic. Ned turned around and glared at Sonny.
"Beat it, Sonny! I was next and after I say my peace and sing my song to Alexis the rest of you are going to be redundant anyway."
Alexis eyed the bathroom and the toilet and wondered if she had time to bow to the porcelain god while Ned and Sonny finished up their measuring contest. Then she decided that maybe she should wait until she heard what they had in store.
"Get on with it, Ned! I am expecting take out in moment." Alexis rolled her eyes.
He started to sing his apology.
"Oh dearest Alexis. I treated you so bad. I pushed you and belittled you. I drove you away. In a semi no less. Then I wooed your dead sister. Yes it was all about you! I am so sorry I was a jerk and if you take me back. I will bend to your will until I crack." The word crack was such a high note it nearly cracked the vases containing the roses.
"That reeked!" Luke commented.
"Keep up your day job!" Nikolas added, giving a thumbs down.
"You say you want to be an American Idol? An alley cat has a better chance at a record contract than you" Jabbed Zander.
Ned ignored them and looked right at Alexis.
"So what do you say? Will you be my Valentine?" He gave her a hopeful look.
"Well, I agree with the sentiment of the song. You have been a pushy jerk." Alexis shrugged
"So you forgive me and will take me back?" He asked while the other men in the room groaned.
"No, sorry but that semi has left the weigh station for good!" She ignored the frown and defeated look on his face.
"At last, the only man I really wanted to see tonight!" Alexis looked towards the door, past Sonny and to a blushing take put delivery man.
"Chinese takeout." The man replied.
"She will not be needed that!" Sonny pushed the man back into the hall, tipped him and sent him on his way before Alexis could mouth off the words "What the h*ll do you think you are doing?"
"You do not need take out Alexis." Sonny shook his head in a scolding manner.
"Talk about pushy! You call that man back here this instant Sonny Corinthos! That was my dinner!"
Alexis gave him a look that meant business and then looked on in astonishment as he wheeled in a cart with several covered dishes.
"I slaved all day over a hot stove to prepare you a Valentine feast fit for a goddess." Sonny fluttered his eyes at Alexis in a seductive manner.
I am sure it is delicious, Sonny, but why are you here?" She gave him a puzzled look.
Sonny took a deep breath and hopped he could find the right words. When he started to speak, he let the verse flow from his heart.
Alexis your were the best thing that ever happened to me. You were the brass ring and I threw it away for some cheap prize out a of a gumball machine. I am so sorry that I left you and went back to Carly. I thought I loved her, but I really had the love of my life and my soul mate in you. I know that I am not worthy of your forgiveness and I know that there are too many reasons why we can never been together. For one, I know you will never forgive me for my part in killing your sister. You should not have to forgive me. I always claim to protect the people I love, but the ones I love the most I always find a way to hurt them the most. The best way I can think of to protect you and your daughter now is to stay away from the both of you forever, but I want you to know that I will spend my whole life alone. Because if I can’t have you Alexis I don’t want anyone. Now eat before your dinner gets cold."
Sony uncovered a lavish feast and pulled her up a chair. The other men sat there in baited anticipation waiting for her reaction. Alexis had to swallow back tears before she could speak.
"Are you going to eat?" Was all she could muster.
"Naw, I can get my fill just watching you eat." Sonny sighed, and looked to the other guys for confirmation. They all nodded in agreement. Alexis picked up her fork and felt a little uncomfortable with so many eyes on her.
She was actually relieved to hear another knock on the door. She bounded up and opened it to find Cameron standing there holding a big box of candy in the shape of a heart. He looked around the full to brimming room in astonishment.
"Happy Valentines Day Alexis! Are you having a party and forget to invite me. I brought you candy. I know you hate nuts. So I scanned all the boxes in town and made you up one big box with pieces that do not contain any nuts." He handed the box of candy to Alexis, was wearing a look on her face much like that of a rabbit caught in the headlights of an oncoming Mack truck. Nikolas jumped up from the couch and confronted Cameron.
"Are you the one that tied up the MRI machine all morning?"
Nikolas squawked and stamped his foot like an angry rooster.
"Of course he was" Zander replied in a flipped manner. "He only cares about himself, not the rest of the world."
Cameron took a deep breath.
"Alexzander, it is nice to see you not spending the holiday in jail or flat on your face in some kind of gutter." He pointedly replied. Alexis was sure she saw Zander give his father an obscene gesture. Alexis gave him a scolding look. Cameron turned his attention back to Nikolas.
"Maybe I was the one tying up the machine." Cameron causally and innocently replied as if using an MRI to scan pieces of chocolate was perfectly acceptable and normal. This made Nikolas even more angry.
"There were patients who needed that machine! I am running a hospital, not Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory."
Nikolas angrily insisted.
"You might be happier if your were running a chocolate factory."
Cameron remarked in a most diplomatic tone.
"I have been telling him that for years."
Luke chimed in at a most inopportune moment. Although, there probably would not have been a really good time for him to chime in.
"That is it! I want you off the staff of GH!" I want you gone. Nikolas angrily replied.
"I don’t work at GH, jr." Luke cracked a smile.
"I think he means me!"
Cameron volunteered enthusiastically, or at least with as much enthusiasm as he tended to show about anything.
"Yes, I mean you, Dr. Lewis you are fired!"
Oh, you can’t fire me, because your aunt is in love with me. He casually informed him. The whole room turned in shock and looked at Alexis for confirmation.
"I most certainly am not in love with him! I hardly know him and I can not stand him on a good day! " Alexis insisted as her voice rose a notch or two.
"She is in love with me!" Luke volunteered.
"I am the love of her life!" Ned insisted.
"I am the only man she ever married." Jax reminded them all.
"I would be lucky to have her heart!" Sonny pouted.
"Then, Dr. Lewis you are so fired!" Nikolas gloated
Alexis wanted them all to go away and bring back her Chinese take out.
"Nikolas you can not fire him. It is rude and an abuse of power! I love you and Zander as family and the rest of you can just all go to..." She stops herself. "No, on second thought I am going to go into the kitchen and make myself something to eat"
A disappointed look crosses the faces all the assembled men.
"I made you dinner." Sonny reminds her.
"I brought you candy." Cameron counters.
"I made you a paper heart with my own two hands!" Zander insists.
" I brought you fine wine. I left it in the hall because my hands were full." Jax replies as he goes to the hall to fetch the wine. He comes back with a bottle of wine and a vase of orchids. Nikolas snaches them from his hand and gives them to Alexis.
"I brought you orchids" He grins.
"The why did the card say they were for Gi..." Nikolas stops Jax before he reveals the truth.
"Orchids are my aunts favorite flower!" He beams.
"Well I used to like orchids, but now I like..." Before Alexis can finish Sonny finishes for her.
"Now she likes gardenias, which I just happen to have here."
He pulls open a box and shows her the gardenias. A smile plays across her lips. However, no one in the room wants to be outdone. Ned picks up one of the vases that Jax had brought in.
"The red roses are from me!" Ned insists.
"I brought you sterling roses!" Jax replies as he pushes them under her nose for her to smell.
Luke starts to root around in his jacket and like a magician he pulls out a bunch of life daises.
"They were my darlen Laura’s favorite flower." He smiles nostalgically.
"Shouldn’t you give those to your Laura want to be hooker friend?"
Cameron scolded as he looked around for something floral to present to Alexis.
"Do you go around talking about the business of all your patients? You know, Tash, he told me that you were crazy!" Luke gave the good doctor a big smile.
"What?" Alexis gave Cameron a death glare.
"Sorry!" He shrugged and then he spied a bunch of flowers, in a vase on a tray out in the hall and lunged for them. He presented them to Alexis happily.
"They are wildflowers!" He gleefully remarked. Alexis sneezed and 5 handkerchiefs and two pieces of Kleenex were immediately placed under her nose.
"Argg! This is too much!" She threw her hands up in the air and stomped off into the kitchen.
The men all exchanged perplexed, innocent looks She came back in about 10 minutes carrying a bowl of microwave popcorn and a can of diet Coke. They were all sitting quietly on the couch. The flowers had all been removed to the balcony. Alexis decided maybe if she ignored them, they would eventually take the hint and leave. She sat down at her desk and started to go over some report. She ate a handful of popcorn and then opened her diet Coke.
"Ouch!" She exclaimed, which was a mistake because all 7 men were nearly on top of her in less than a minute.
"What happened?" Nikolas panicked.
"Do I need to call an ambulance?" Zander earnestly wanted to know. She could tell from the look on his face that he really wanted her to be hurt so he could take care of her.
"I broke a nail opening the can and it hurt a little." Alexis informed her on lookers.
"I should have opened that can for you!" Jax slapped himself on the forehead.
"Let me kiss it and make it better!" Luke insisted, grabbing her hand. Alexis pulled it away.
"I already called Lucky, he is on his way and he can help me give you a manicure. He has great color sense and he practices on LuLu" Nikolas offered. Luke made a face.
"I will hold your other hand while they file this one!" Cameron promised.
"I will put out a hit on whoever is the manager at that plant!" A devilish look crossed Sonny’s face.
"Are your shoulders tight because of your injury? I can give you a message." Jax started rubbing her shoulders, but she found it only made her more tense.
"I will draw you a bath!" Luke offered and ran off to the bathroom.
"I will wash your hair!" Cameron called back to her as he followed Luke.
"I will sing you a lullaby." Ned offered.
"I will tuck you into bed!" Sonny gave her a sexy smile. She considered that one for a moment, then Alexis stood up and pulled away from Jax.
"People think I am crazy? You are all a bunch of lunatics. I wanted attention. What woman would not want attention on Valentines Day, but this is too much! I am going to count to 30 and I want you all out of my living room!" She closed her eyes and started to slowly count to 30. when she opened her eyes she let out a sigh of relief when she realized that she was alone. Except for Sonny who was on the balcony and she still wasn’t sure if she wanted to do him against the wall or push him off. So she decided he could stay until she made up her mind. She needed a fresh soda first.
She opened up the door to the kitchen and was shocked to find Ned, sitting on a chair, buck naked except of his guitar.
"Alexis I wrote you another song."
He fluttered hey eyes at her, she creamed and closed the door out of breath. She leaned against the wall for support and decided maybe a hot bath was a good idea. She opened the door to the bathroom and found out Luke already had the idea. he was in her tub, smoking a cigar, surrounded by bubbles and her rubber duck!
"Natasha, the bath water is getting cold and I am wrinkling up." He smiled. Alexis took the cigar out of his mouth and put it out in the water. She cradled her poor, innocent, no doubt traumatized ducky and left Luke to wrinkle in the tub. She secretly hopped he would go down the drain with the other cold, stale water. She passed Nikolas and Zander arguing in the hall.
"Alexis which of us do you love more?"
She ignored them and wondered where Cameron could be. She found her answer when she opened the guest bathroom and found him naked accept for a few sheets of startlingly placed pieces of pink and red tissue paper. He was holding a picture of water and was all ready to wash her hair.
"Alexis!" He gleefully said as he held out a bottle of shampoo. Alexis rolled her eyes, closed the door and walked away towards her bedroom. Sonny was still on the balcony and Nikolas was now answering the door. Zander was sulking on the couch. She opened the door to her bedroom and was not surprised at all to see Jax, obviously naked, in her bed under her satin sheets
"Alexis I have been waiting years for this."
He opened his arms to her and she thought about taking him up on his offer. Then she heard Nikolas arguing with someone in the hall. She was curious enough to open the door and see Lucky standing in the hallway only wearing a towel. He was asking Nikolas why he has to do it? Nikolas was replying that Alexis was his favorite aunt and she deserved something special on Valentines Day. Nikolas then disappeared into the nursery. Alexis looked at Jax and then at Lucky. Then she walked out into the hall, flustering and surprising Lucky who dropped his towel.
"Nice butt!" Alexis commented as she walked by. Lucky turned red and quickly covered himself. Alexis decided that he was too self conscious and moved on to the living room. Sonny was eating the candy Cameron had brought her. She gave him a once over and causally asked.
"Why are you still dressed?" She meant it to be sarcastic. After all, every other man in town that she was not related to was naked in some part of her house. She wondered what made Sonny think he was so special. He, of course took it as an invitation and stood up and started to unbutton his shirt.
I thought you would never ask. I was afraid I going to explode any minute now if you didn’t ask me to make love to you soon. It has been far too long since I was with a real woman Alexis. The thought of you being with any other man tonight almost drove me crazy. I am glad that you finally made a choice Alexis and that it is me you want to be with. This has been a long time in the making." He had a relieved look on his face as he started to strip down. Alexis had that rabbit caught in head lights look on her face once more.
To be continued .........
GH Storybook