words mean only what meaning you attach to them

from the mouths of idiots.
Words mean only the meaning which you attach to them

"... your terms of endearments grow progressively more disturbing." Justin Eason. (Blame it on Steven, who is my favorite little Sugarfetus, aren't you sweetie? Yes you are!)
"Ohhh I like you, let's fuck." Will Bigger (I have no idea if that's the right way to spell his last name. But that's how it sounds.)
"No... I'm not gay. My wrists are just broken." Will Bigger
Steven took me to a party at one of his friends house. A few days later his friends had this to say to him:
Friend1: Why do you bring over chicks who don't put out?
Friend2: ... Could you just bring her back over so she can reject me again?
"Writing can be really expressive." ~ Justin Eason (Justin goes to UNC Chapel Hill... now all I wanna know is how he got in?)
"You need to be spade." ~ Ryan Rembert (Ah Ryan, I wish it were that simple)
(In an internet conversation I had used "LMAO") "Laugh your pituitary gland off" ~ Will Ames

"I have standards?" ~ Justin Eason

All of the following came from one conversation with Steven Matthews

"If she's attractive, you're just hoping she's one of those girls that has no standards."

(I asked him how his trip to New Orleans had been.) "It smelled like feet and alcohol."

"These girls keep telling me their problems and I just feel like saying: 'What does that have to do with you having sex with me?'"

"**** **** is cursed by God. [later in the conversation]... I mean, you could shit on his face and it wouldn't make a difference." Steven is going TO HELL! Names deleted to protect the ugly.

"I thought Venezuela was a resort..." Eddie
(I asked him why crazy people like me.) " I don't know Tia...pheromones?" ~ Steven Matthews
"Ass? I don't try to get ass... It tries to get me." ~ Lance Hutto (If Lance and Levi were in a stadium together everyone else would have to leave to make room for their egos.)
"Enter as many files as you wish; up to ten at once!" ~ Angelfire
(I showed him a picture of me standing between Skye and Sharon) "You're the creamy center in an idiot oreo." ~Ryan Rembert
"Ohhh Tia, you're just an equal opportunity slut, aren't you." ~Steven Matthews
"Wanna know how to get out of ever doing yard work again?... gouge out your eye."~Robert Cooley
"Thank you and fuck you."~Johnny Patterson
"**** and **** are fags. Tell ****s girlfriend to come visit me." ~Will Ames [names deleted to protect the innocent.. Will is just mean]
"I'm sorry... I'd insult you or something but I'm just too tired." ~ Ryan Rembert (thanks)
"You know what we used to do for fun in high school?... Beat whores with newspapers."~Robert Cooley
"These shoes are comfortable.... just not to walk in."~Tia [ok, I had a Tina moment.]
{I was explaining the dating rules and when everything should take place} "So how long before we get to the foreplay?" ~ Levi Green
"adolescence"~Johnny Patterson [had to be there]
"Well you're not ugly and you're not handicapped"~Will Ames [no wonder I love you]
"I think it's in my left leg." ~ Tia [Steven is the only one who will get this]
"I'm not gay, I just didn't stop him from sucking my dick."~because of the possiblity of death by ass kicking I'm not naming this person.
{I was talkinging about a guy I know being insane}"You know that could be a sign of genius. {I say "Well some people think I'm insane does that mean I'm a genius?"}... Ohhh I'm sorry Tia, in your case that just means 'fucked up'".~Steven Matthews
"Bring me some tea goddamnit, cause I'm a red hot piss vixen." ~ guess
{while comparing his (ex) girlfriend to a suppository because she was constantly up his ass}"I feel like saying "Why don't you fucking dissolve already" ~ Steven Matthews
"Yeah there was some fuckin goin on... good cardio man." ~ Robert Cooley
{trying to sound like the croc hunter}"Oh I've really pissed 'er off now. Let's see what she'll do if I compare Matchbox20 to LoveFist. Oh boy look at 'er go. Watch, I'm going to stick my leg in her mouth and see if she chews it off."~Steven Matthews [yeah that's why Prince sucks man]
"You are never allowed to speak again." ~ Ryan Rembert
"I don't even really pay attention to the good looking girls... I kinda try to pay attention to the ugly girls who would be interested in me." ~ Steven Matthews [bad bad]
"If you have to refer to men as meat, at least specify that I'm filet mignon." ~ Levi Green
"Yeah, stupid has been going around lately. I've got a case of it myself... but I think you may need to go to the doctor for yours, you've had it since I've known you." ~ Ryan Rembert.
(I asked how the date went) "Well he speaks in complete sentences...." ~ Skye Senterfeit
"It's sad that clothes I buy for two dollars look better than the ones you buy for twenty." ~ Steven Matthews
"You wonder why you can't keep a boyfriend... I don't" ~ Ryan Rembert (Yes I love you too)
"I can't masturebate... it's not night time yet." (?) ~ Sharon Martin
"Are you dreaming about killing oxen?" ~ Steven Matthews (Only Meg, Justin, Steven, Jon, and Beth will get this.)
"Your homework is to get trashed and draw strange pictures." ~My art teacher.
"Who has weed? I'm fresh out, I'm a freaking college professor, and a straight artist whith a wife who looks like Michael Jackson. I need weed." ~ Art teacher.
"What's the Civil War." ~Amber Lang (She's from the North and I had made a joke about us recreating the Civil War if she didn't stop doing something. She seriously did not know what the Civil War was.)
"Oh, I didn't know the phone had to be hooked up to that thing to work." ~ Amber Lang (Yeah C of C accepts people like her. Apply now)
"I am SOOO full, I wish they'd hurry up and bring that toast."~Tina Altman
"Have you ever noticed that the road gets darker at night?"~Tina Altman [no she's not blonde]
"I BROKE MY CLIT, I BROKE MY CLIT!!!"~Brandy Williamson
{while playing a joke on a friend, he was referring to me}"God, she actually sounds like a real girl"~Kenny Pittman
{after telling him about someone talking shit about me} "I can't believe she called you a whore. That's the fartherest thing from the truth... You're to butch to be a whore."~Brandon King [irk]
"You should go to Nashville... so I won't have to hear you anymore."~Brandy Williamson [such great friends I have]
{before going to see Titanic}"I bet someone's going to die in this movie"~Tina Altman [she was serious]
"Oh Jesus, you're dating THAT poster child for birth control??" ~Barney Campbell
"I hate these slow as ass people."~Shannon Berry [exactly how slow is ass?]
"If that's true I'll fall down and kick my own ass." ~mom aka The Beast
"Yeah, you wanna knock da bottom outta dat ass don't you."~Brandon King
{I was telling her that I may go to church the following Sunday}"Oh really? Well be sure to tell me which one so I can warn the fire department beforehand."~Tina Altman [smartass]
{after he had told me to do something I asked "and who's daddy are you" he looks around, confused}"I don't know.... that kid over there kinda looks like me."~Barney Campbell [to understand how funny this was you have to be aware of the vast number of women Barney has slept with, last count before he got married was at the high end of 70, but he wasn't exactly sure]
"I don't want yall to think bad of me just because I stabbed that boy"~Chris Allen [who is now in jail... for stabbing someone else]
"Why you all up in my grill like a piece of Matchlight?" ~ Brandy Williamson
"I'm about to go where every man has gone before." ~ Lance Hutto [funny]
"My job has just sodomized my weekend." ~ Al [some guy who plays guitar at school all the time]
"She's been fucked so many times you could probably do a 360 with a mack truck in her pussy." ~ Barney Campbell
"A river, a lake, and a pond are all the same thing. Go look it up in the dictionary." ~ Angel Grimsley [Not Angel Fouch]
"The link to your student pages has attracted the notice of some folks whose notice we do not want-leading to disablement of the feature. Congratulations! That's an achievement and proof that you can write stuff with impact. Unfortunately, I didn't get to read it. But that's okay-let's conduct the rest of this class without attracting unwanted attention from the Bible Belt." ~ Kreg Spivey {my ENGL 102 and Creative Writing teacher}[YAY!!! I'm a trouble-maker!!! YAY!!]
"Oh my God now I know you're on drugs. You'd have to be to do some kind of shit like that." ~ Mom [I showed her my tongue ring]

Sex Quotes
Some of these were just too good not to put up. I'm not listing the names.
"TIA: So when do classes start? / HIM: You're a good lay... just thought you should know." Well thankie. I'll ask people when classes start more often.
(I was doing something very nice for him and he says with surfer dude intonation, completely serious)"Whoa dude, you're making me want to like fuck and shit." ~ I laughed for days, my friends laughed for days, my Mom laughed for days. I'm laughing now.
(fist time I had sex, it lasted two minutes) "I was ok untill you started moving..." ~ excuses excuses
(I had Pneumonia) "Come on baby... all you'll have to do is lay there." ~ geez
"Let's make babies." Nothing could kill the mood faster than that statement.
"I'll pay you if you don't make me wear a condom." ~ geez

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