I couldn’t help but laugh. “Yeah, I guess so. She’s just good at getting what she wants.” I paused for a minute, choosing my words carefully. “I should learn a thing or two about that from her.”
Willow gave me a strange look and my heart tripled its beat for a second, but she shrugged it off and reached for the bowl of salad. “So what have you been up to lately? I haven’t seen you for a while.”
“Um, not much. A little of this, a little of that…” I trailed off, shrugging. “I’m moving to Ohio.”
Will froze, giving me a surprised look. “Ohio?”
I nodded.
“Um, wow. Ok. Ohio. That’s… kind of far away,” she rambled, putting the salad bowl back while not realizing that she hadn’t even taken any. I smiled a little and reached for the bowl to put some greens on her plate. “Why Ohio?”
“I don’t know. It’s nice there, and it’s a little break. Zac is going with me too,” I told her. Realization dawned on her and she nodded knowingly.
“I get it now… Reagan’s in Ohio…” she said. I gave her a sheepish grin.
“I had to do it for Zac,” I explained.
“That’s a big thing to do for your brother,” she replied. I nodded. Willow looked down and saw that I had put some salad on her plate. “Thank you.”
“No problem.”
Conversation was halted for a brief, awkward moment as neither of us knew quite what to say. Willow put some of my mother’s casserole on her plate, then passed the dish to me. I put some on my plate and set the dish down, but didn’t touch my silverware. I took a little breath, then looked over at Willow.
“How long will you-”
“Will you come-” We said at the same time. We laughed a little, awkwardly. Willow looked worriedly down at her plate, her hands clasped tightly in her lap. Concern took over me. “Will? Something wrong?”
“What were you going to ask me?” she questioned. I swallowed thickly.
“I wanted to know if you would go with us, me and Zac, to Ohio,” I repeated. Willow gave me a confused look.
“Why?”
“I don’t know,” came out of my mouth automatically. I clamped my mouth shut and shook my head quickly. “No, no I didn’t mean that. I just… I want you to go too. I don’t want to be away from you.”
“I don’t think it is such a good idea…” Will started slowly. I shook my head again and took her hand.
“No, it is a good idea. It’s a great idea. You can talk to your boss, see if you can do some work long distance…” I tried desperately to convince her that it was right for her to come. Willow still looked hesitant, and my eyebrows crinkled in thought. “Do you even want to come?”
“I don’t know,” she replied.
“Don’t say that.”
“Then what can I say? I honestly do not know if I want to.” Willow took her hand away from mine and stood up, and then walked over to the sink. She stood their quietly for a moment, looking out of the window over the sink out into the dark yard. “One part of me thinks that it would be fun, but another part thinks… maybe that’s just too much time for us to be together.”
I stood up also and walked over to stand beside her. “Why don’t you want to spend time with me?”
“It’s not that I don’t want to… It’s that I shouldn’t…”
“Why shouldn’t you?”
“Because.” Will turned to face me, her eyes clearly showing worry and confusion. “I don’t trust myself with you.”
I suddenly found myself captivated by her look of innocent confusion. I knew she was waiting for me to say something, but no words were able to form on my tongue. Only one thing went through my mind at that second, and I decided to throw all caution aside. Following my instinct, I slowly brought my hand up to cradle the side of her face and leaned down just enough so that our lips touched.
“Hi babe,” I greeted. A shocked look crossed her face.
“Zac? What are you doing here?” she demanded, looking around quickly before pulling me into the house and closing the door quickly behind us. I smirked.
“Gee, Reagan, I’m happy to see you too, but please, contain your excitement!” I joked, then gave her a confused look. “What’s wrong? I thought you’d be glad to see that I’m here.”
“My aunt will kill us both if she catches you here,” Reagan told me, grabbing my hand and dragging me through the house, into the kitchen, and then out into the backyard. She paused for a moment when I yanked my hand away.
“Hey, calm down a second. Your aunt left, I saw her go,” I told her. Reagan narrowed her eyes.
“You’re watching my house?” she asked. I shrugged a little.
“Just today. I wanted to know that your aunt was gone before I came any closer.”
“What are you doing here?”
“Isaac and I moved here,” I answered. Reagan’s eyes widened.
“You what?!”
“We moved here. To be closer to you,” I said, grinning and reaching out for her. “And now I am closer to you-”
“No, Zac, go home. Just go back to Tulsa. No one asked for you to come here,” she declared, pushing me away from her. I gave her a confused look.
“But… but I thought you’d be happy?” I replied.
“You’re just going to cause problems. I don’t understand, Zac. You know that I’m going back to Tulsa eventually, why couldn’t you just wait for me there?” she asked. Hurt filled my eyes.
“Because I want to be with you now. I want to be here for you so you don’t have to go through this alone,” I told her. I reached for her again. “Reagan, please, I’m not going to cause problems. Your aunt will never know that I’m here…”
“Go home Zac, please,” Reagan stepped away from me, giving me a pleading look before turning and heading back up the porch stairs. I watched her go, confusion filling my senses. Just before I was about to walk away also, I saw Reagan stumble on the stairs. In a flash, I was beside her and put my arms around her. “Zac…”
“It’s ok, it’s ok. Sit down,” I told her, helping her sit on the steps. “Are you okay?”
“I think… I’m…” her voice faded away as her eyes rolled up and she passed out, going limp in my arms. I swallowed thickly and reach up, gently tapping her face with my hand.
“Reagan, wake up. Reagan?” I said quietly, shaking her gently. I heard a door close inside the house and looked up sharply.
“Reagan? I’m home!” A voice called. My heart stopped for a second as I contemplated what to do. Should I stay with her and get caught? Or should I run? I decided that I didn’t want to risk getting caught and cause any problems, so I carefully rested Reagan on the stairs and dashed off towards the line of trees at the edge of the property. Once safely hidden behind the trees, I stopped and looked back. Reagan’s Aunt Kathy appeared at on the porch and knelt down beside Reagan. As I watched, Reagan woke up again and Kathy helped her stand up, and they both disappeared into the house.
I was sitting on the couch with my guitar, nothing new there, going over some lyrics when Zac came back from visiting Reagan one day. I barely glanced up, pretending to be absorbed by my work, and Zac tossed himself down into a chair across from me. I squinted in thought at the words on the page before me, then scratched out a line and began to replace it. Zac sighed.
“Hi Ike,” he stated.
“Hi Zac,” I replied, writing furiously as words came to my mind. He waited for a second in silence for me to say something else, but I kept on with my writing.
“What are you doing?”
“What does it look like I’m doing?”
“I don’t know. Writing. Are you writing another song?”
“Does it look like I’m writing another song?”
“Yeah… Are you going to keep answering questions with questions?”
“I don’t know. Are you going to keep asking me questions?”
“I didn’t know that I was bothering you by trying to start a conversation. Forgive me for being human,” he grumbled, standing up. Guilt instantly gripped me, and I sighed a little. I put down the pencil and rested my arms criss-crossed over my guitar.
“I’m sorry Zac. I didn’t mean to be rude,” I apologized. He paused at the door and turned around to look at me. He had a puzzled look on his face.
“What happened, Ike? You used to never get like this. Now you’re a hermit. You spend all your time in this apartment, writing depressing love songs, and snapping at me for everything that I do. What happened?” he asked. I looked away from him and shook my head, picking up the pencil again and absently tapping the eraser against the coffee table.
“Nothing. It’s not important,” I replied. He came back and sat down again across from me.
“Well, something had to have happened. People don’t just change like this for any reason,” he commented. He paused for a second in thought. “Well, unless they’re pregnant, but then it’s because of the whole hormone thing, and…”
He trailed off when I gave him an uninterested, eyebrow raised look. He grinned a little. “You’re not pregnant, are you Ike?”
“Gee Zac, I never thought of that. Maybe I am,” I joked flatly, and he giggled.
“I’m sorry. I’m just trying to figure out why you’re being like this. I want to help you. I have to live with you and deal with you in this never-ending state of bad mood, and I really want to help get you out of it,” he explained. I shook my head once again, then started drawing little designs on the paper which held all of the lyrics I had been writing that afternoon. “Does it have anything to do with the fact that Will decided not to come with us?”
I froze at his suggestion, a stupid move on my part because it showed Zac that he had hit the nail right on the head. He sensed this and grinned. “Ahh… I’m good.”
“Don’t feel too sure of yourself,” I countered, tossing the pencil down again and resting my guitar on the couch as I stood up. I went into the kitchen and began to rummage through the refrigerator, and I heard movement in the archway.
“What happened with her?” Zac asked. I shook my head.
“Nothing. I misjudged some things, that’s all,” I explained, settling on a bottle of Sunny Delight orange juice and grabbing it out of the fridge. I decided to try and change the subject. “How’s Reagan doing?”
“Better. The doctor told her that she fainted last week because of a vitamin deficiency, and he gave her some vitamin supplements to take. Now what happened between you and Willow?” he shot back, catching onto my attempt at swaying the conversation off of me and Willow. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to avoid the question forever, so I gave in.
“Ok, well, mom decided to play Cupid for the evening and…”
“You called?” I asked, stepping into the nursery. Olive turned to me with a smile.
“Yeah. What are you doing downstairs?” she replied. I shook my head and sat down on the floor with Brad Jr. and started playing with his toys with him.
“Nothing, just reading a little. Why?"
“I was just wondering, that’s all. You’ve been staying in a lot more often recently. Why’s that?” she asked. I shrugged. “When are Isaac and Zac coming home?”
I tensed slightly at the mention of Isaac’s name, but made sure to keep my face turned away from my sister-in-law so that she wouldn’t see. “Um, I’m not sure.”
“Oh,” was all Olive said as she finished with Melissa, and then joined us sitting on the floor with the baby on her lap. “It’s kind of strange that they didn’t ask you to go with them. Don’t they usually do that?”
“They did,” I informed her flatly, rolling a toy truck across the carpet to Brad Jr. who promptly turned it around and rolled it back to me.
“Did they?” Olive sounded surprised, and I nodded. “Well, why didn’t you go with them?”
“I didn’t really feel like it,” I replied, and was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell. I stood up. “I’ll get it.”
“Oh yeah, I forgot that we were having company,” Olive stated, giving me an innocent look. I narrowed my eyes at her slightly for not telling me, then hurried down the stairs and too the front door. I opened the door and saw Taylor standing on the other side. He smiled as I looked surprised.
“Hey Will,” he greeted, giving me a hug.
“Hi Tay, what’s up? Come in,” I offered, opening the door wider to allow him to come in. “So what’s up?”
“Nothing, I just thought I’d stop by and see how you were, what you were up to,” he replied.
“I’m just relaxing, reading a little, stuff like that,” I explained. There was noise at the top of the stairs and we looked up to see Brad Jr. scooting down each step on his butt, with Olive holding Melissa right behind him. She smiled when she saw us.
“Hi Taylor, how are you?” she asked.
“I’m good, how are you?” he replied, returning her smile.
“Great, thanks.”
“T!” Brad Jr. shrieked, seeing Taylor and calling him by his “designated” name.
“B.J.!” Tay exclaimed, stooping down and lifting the child in his arms. “What’s up big guy? That’s a nice truck you have there. What kind is it?”
“Fire truck,” Brad informed him, holding the plastic toy up for Taylor to see better. I smiled at their interaction. When Reagan had her baby, Taylor would make a great uncle. He’d had enough practice with kids already. Tay set my nephew back on the floor, then turned to me with a grin at Olive and the kids went into the kitchen for a snack.
“He gets bigger every time I see him,” he commented. I nodded in agreement, and led the way into the den off the hall.
“Yeah, he’s our little weed,” I said with a smile as we sat down on the sofa. Tay looked around a little, and I had the feeling that he hadn’t stopped by just to see my nephew. “So what’s up? You’re here for a specific reason, I’m assuming?”
Tay turned to me slightly surprised, then he smiled. “You know me too well,” he said. I nodded in agreement, smiling also. “Well, honestly, there is something that I wanted to… invite you to.”
“Invite me to? Are you having a party?” I asked.
“No,” Taylor replied, shaking his head. “More like a ‘Happy Birthday’ trip somewhere.”
I gave him a confused look. A happy birthday trip? The only person whose birthday was coming up was Zac’s… and he was in Ohio. Realization dawned on me, and I gave Tay a wide eyed look. “Oh, no Tay. No thank you. I appreciate you including me, but…” I trailed off and stood up, walking away from him.
“But what?” Tay prodded, standing up also but now following me. “Will, this is crazy. What is going on now so that you don’t want to be near Isaac, even to wish Zac a happy birthday?”
“Nothing, nothing is going on,” I insisted, tugging on my fingers nervously until I felt a knuckle pop. I flinched in pain, then turned to Taylor. “I just don’t think it would be appropriate. Isaac and Zac are there to be near Reagan, they don’t need me going too…”
“They want you to be there. I’ve talked to them, and they both agree that they’d enjoy it if you were there too,” Tay explained. I started to shake my head and turn away again, but Taylor reached forward and grabbed my arm gently, preventing me from walking away. “Look, Will, I don’t know exactly what happened between you and Ike before he left, but I do know that he’s miserable. You and I both know that he cares a lot for you, so don’t hurt him like this. He’s my brother, and I only want to see him happy, and you make him happy.”
“I can’t make him happy,” I said miserably, pulling my arm out of Taylor’s grasp. “I’ve tried. I care a lot about him too, and I don’t want to hurt him. I know that going to Ohio will only hurt him more.”
“I beg to differ,” Tay stated, and I turned to him with a worried look. “I think that you going to Ohio with me would be the best thing for both of you right now. And if I’m wrong, then I promise never to meddle in the situation ever again.”
I thought for a moment and realized that he could be right. If I went to Ohio, only for a few days, I could clear everything up with Isaac. I nodded my head, and Tay raised his eyebrow a little.
“Ok, I’ll go,” I agreed finally.
“She’ll be here for my birthday,” I said absently, running my fingers down Reagan’s blonde hair lightly. Reagan turned her head a little and grinned at me.
“Exactly. She can get me out of the house easily, and we can go to your apartment and have a little party for you,” she said. I smiled.
“That would be nice,” I agreed. Reagan gave me a little kiss on the cheek, then turned so that her back was to me again. We were quiet for a few minutes, and I grew curious. “What are you thinking?”
“Nothing…” Reagan sighed. “I miss my home.”
“Well, home misses you. It isn’t the same,” I told her. “Hence, why I’m here and not there.”
Reagan smiled and rested her head back against my shoulder. “Have you thought about what things are going to be like? I mean, not just for us, but for you and your brothers? What will your management do?” she asked. I shook my head.
“I don’t care, and whatever they do, it doesn’t matter. They can’t control my life, they can’t stop me from wanting or having a family,” I said defensively. Reagan turned her head towards me again and smiled again, then leaned over and kissed my cheek.
“Have I told you lately how much I admire you? You’re so brave. You’re ready to face anyone and any obstacle that comes our way,” she said. I grinned a little.
“Well, when it comes to the people I care about, no obstacle is too big,” I told her. We laid together for a while more, until it was 3:00 and we knew that her aunt would be back soon. We parted with a kiss, and I headed back towards my apartment. I didn’t visit her the next day because her aunt wasn’t leaving the house at all, due to the arrival of Reagan’s cousin. The next day, however, was my eighteenth birthday, and we were having a little get together at the apartment. As promised, Reagan’s cousin, Kristin, was able to get her out of the house and snuck her over. Fate works in mysterious ways, because the only people at the “party” were me, Reagan, Isaac, and Kristin, who happened to be only a few months younger than Isaac. What a perfect set up!
“Hey, pass me a slice of pizza!” I said, reaching for the box of pizza which was obviously out of my reach. I didn’t feel like getting up and moving, seeing as I was lying on the couch with Reagan, and I was too comfortable to move. Isaac sighed a little, but grinned and leaned forward to shove the box in my direction.
“I guess you can get away with being a lazy ass for today, because it’s your birthday and all,” he stated. I nodded in agreement and took a bite of pizza. Reagan laughed.
“As opposed to him being a lazy ass any other day of the year?” she teased. I shot her a playfully hurt look, and she made a puppy dog face at me for a moment before grinning and leaning over to give me a little kiss.
“So have you been working on a lot of songs since moving here?” Kristin asked Isaac, sitting in the overstuffed easy chair beside his. He shrugged a little, spinning an empty Pepsi bottle in his hands.
“Yeah, a few have seemed to form themselves,” he answered her. I raised my eyebrows a little as I watched their interaction, and Kristin smiled.
“Could I maybe hear one?” she asked. I saw my brother hesitate, and I cleared my throat.
“Yeah, come on Ike. I haven’t even heard all of them,” I prompted. After a few moments of contemplating, Isaac agreed and went to his room to retrieve his acoustic guitar. The second he disappeared down the hall to his bedroom, there was a knock on the door. I sighed for a second, but knew that I had to go answer it. I gave Reagan a quick peck on the cheek before getting up and jogging over to the door.
“Got it!” I called, turning the knob and swinging the door. I looked out in the hallway to see who had bothered me to get off the couch, and my jaw dropped in surprise.
“Happy Birthday Zac,” I added, letting go and stepping back a little. Zac still looked stunned.
“Why… What are you doing here?” he stuttered slightly. Tay smirked a little and reached forward to give him a gentle shove.
“Way to welcome her,” he teased, pushing past him and into the apartment.
“No, that’s not what I meant…” Zac insisted. I smiled and patted his cheek playfully.
“That’s okay, I know what you meant,” I said. Zac stepped aside and let me into the apartment. “Well, your brother here showed up on my doorstep in Chandler and refused to leave until I agreed to come here with him for your birthday. So here we are.”
“Who was it?” a voice asked when we stepped into the apartment. I looked over and saw Reagan sitting on the couch. She grinned when she saw me and Taylor, and got up to give us hugs. “Oh my God! What are you doing here?”
“Visiting for Zac’s birthday,” I answered her, giving her a hug. “How are you?”
“I’m doing fine, thanks,” she replied, giving Taylor a hug. She introduced us to her cousin, Kristin, and I couldn’t help but notice that Isaac wasn’t there.
“Hey, you guys?” I started, giving Zac a curious look. “Where’s-”
“Did someone just knock on the door?” I turned suddenly towards the hallway, and Isaac was standing there with his guitar. He looked just as surprised to see me as Zac had, if not a little more.
“Hey Ike,” Tay greeted, giving Isaac a little wave. Ike waved back absently, his eyes fixed on me. I gave him a small smile.
“Surprise,” I said quietly. He nodded.
“Uh, yeah,” he said. Then he shook his head a little. “Uh, no, I meant it’s a good surprise. Maybe I should say hello first?”
I nodded a little and he awkwardly reached to give me a hug. “How have you been?”
“Miserable,” Zac whispered to me to answer my question. Ike gave him a nasty look, and then walked past us into the living room.
“What song did you want to hear?” he asked Kristin. I instantly felt a slight twinge of jealousy because he had only spoken to me in passing, and then I felt that I probably deserved it. Zac noticed, and cleared his throat a little.
“Actually, can you play the song later? I was thinking that we could go catch a movie or something now,” he suggested. Ike shrugged his shoulders and set the guitar down.
“It’s your birthday,” he replied. Zac smiled and nodded.
“Exactly. I say we go see a movie,” he stated. Everyone agreed and headed towards the door. Just then the phone rang, and Isaac paused. Zac gave him a pleading look. “Ignore it.”
“It might be Pat from the record company… I’ve been waiting for his call. It’ll only be a minute…” he trailed off as he dashed into the kitchen to grab the phone. Zac gave me a slightly annoyed look, and I smiled sympathetically. Reagan kissed Zac’s cheek.
“Kristin, Tay, and I will wait in the lobby,” she told him. Ike stuck his head out of the kitchen then, his hand covering the receiver.
“It’s Pat… you guys go on ahead without me, ok?” he said. Zac sighed and shook his head.
“Ok, whatever,” he agreed. Then he looked at me, his eyebrows raised. “What about you?”
“Um…”
“You stay, I know you guys have a few things to talk about alone,” he told me, resting a hand on my shoulder. “I’ll pick the longest movie to give you more time.”
“Thanks Zac,” I said. He grinned and turned to leave, and when the door was shut behind him I went over to the couch to sit down and wait for Isaac.
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