"A dry crust eaten in piece is better than steak every day along with argument
and strife." -- Proverbs 17:1
Nice to see words like that in the Bible. It gives reassurance to those people who find themselves having
to bail out of some miserable situations in life. Many people dread the words "separation" and "divorce" --
others tend to be so self-righteous and look down on people who have had to go through those miseries of
this life.
I, too, used to think poorly of people who got into trouble along the road in life...until I found myself in
trouble too and then, I learned to be more forgiving and less prejudiced against people in situations that
society snubs.
It is regrettable that so many people, blinded by either erotic or emotional romance, get hitched so quickly
that they fail to realize the impact of what they are doing. Sad too, these days, to see people check in and
check out of marriages almost as fast as they purchase, use and later throw away and replace a disposable
watch. Unlike watches, people have feelings. They also create property, and children, and all kinds of
links and ties that are absolutely disturbed forever, whenever a divorce or other disruption occurs in a
family. I know. Been there, done that.
It means much to me in my RealWorld to have been married to the same woman for over 25 years. She
is a beauty, she is a faithful companion. She lacks a lot of things that many men demand, but I appreciate
knowing that she is always there for me. I also treasure two vows that bind me to her before God. Yes, I
said "I do" at an altar at 12:34pm Eastern on September 21, 1974...but before that I vowed to her now
departed parents that I would love and care for her: mentally, physically, and spiritually for as long as I
live. Such has not always been easy...but I hold dear the fact that this woman -- stricken with epilepsy
and social stigmas since the age of 15 -- would literally be institutionalized and die, if I failed to be there
for her. She supplies me just enough love and all the faithfulness I need, to make the journey worthwhile.
I made the mistake of starting out trying to change her. Our marriage improved dramatically when I
finally learned that it was me, the man in the mirror, that needed to change.
There are a lot of chat buddies here who claim they are so impressed with the kind of person I seem to
be. Trust me, I was not always that way. After sailing through two marriages in which I took my partners
for granted and failed to give them total love and support -- when I reached the current Mrs. Keeper -- I
was flummoxed. Here, was a woman whose health and mood was so variable, that there was positively
no way to take her for granted. I had to master trying to understand her experiences, her moods, her
whims, her needs and her way of expressing love. Once done that -- over years and years of trial and
error -- it is down to an art that is so perfected that we can even communicate without having to say a
word -- because our minds are in perfect sync and harmony.
So friends, how well do you know that partner of yours? Before you tie the knot, do you really know
what their bad days are like? And are you willing to give them the time and space for a tantrum or two
when they need to let off steam? Or are you so wrapped up in yourself that you just don't care...and you
spend the night snarling and hissing at each other, because you can't find a way to satisfy each other?
The Song of Solomon inspires me to the true depths of love that is truly eternal. Despite all the somewhat
racy Old English reading therein, there are some true nuggets and I leave you with one from Chapter
8:6-7. <
"Set me as a seal upon your heart with a permanent betrothal, for love is strong as death and jealousy
is cruel as the grave: it flashes fire like hot coals of a very hot flame.
"Many waters cannot quench love, neither can the floods drown it. If a man/woman tried to buy
everything to buy love with everything that he/she owned, they could not do it...it would be
contaminated and come to naught." --very liberal translation based on King James Version and
Living Bible.
With Love, The HartKeeper
The HartKeeper 
