# Math 11 Humour

• Q: What do you get if you divide the cirucmference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?

A: Pumpkin Pi!

• Teacher: "Who can tell me what 7 times 6 is?"

Student: "It's 42!"

Teacher: "Very good! - And who can tell me what 6 times 7 is?"

Same student: "It's 24!"

• Q: What does the zero say to the the eight?

A: Nice belt!

• Trigonometry for farmers: swine and coswine...

• "Students nowadays are so clueless", the math professor complains to a colleague. "Yesterday, a student came to my office hours and wanted to know if General Calculus was a Roman war hero..."

• "Divide fourteen sugar cubes into three cups of coffee so that each cup has an odd number of sugar cubes in it." "That's easy: one, one, and twelve."

"But twelve isn't odd!"

"It's an odd number of cubes to put in a cup of coffee..."

• Q: What does the little mermaid wear?

A: An algae-bra.

• A mathematician wandered home at 3 AM. His wife became very upset, telling him, "You're late! You said you'd be home by 11:45!" The mathematician replied, "I'm right on time. I said I'd be home by a quarter of twelve."

• Why was six afraid of seven?

Because seven ate nine.

• Math and Alcohol don't mix, so...

PLEASE DON'T DRINK AND DERIVE

• New York (CNN). At John F. Kennedy International Airport today, a Caucasian male (later discovered to be a high school mathematics teacher) was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a compass, a protractor and a graphical calculator. According to law enforcement officials, he is believed to have ties to the Al-Gebra network. He will be charged with carrying weapons of math instruction.