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   There is a lot of misunderstanding about Love. What is it? How 
can you tell if its true love? How is love expressed? The questions  
seem endless...and so are the ideas about what Love is. 
Each of us will have to come to our own understanding. 
Here is what I found as a guide and want to offer to you for you 
to consider. 
    LOVE NEVER HURTS! Any pain coming from my loving someone 
comes from my self-centeredness. The pain comes from my  expectations/ demands. 
    LOVE IS GIVING! Giving freely in the best interest of the other person, no strings attached, otherwise it is just a form of manipulation. 
Without any question or concern about how that will affect me. 
Wanting the other person to be happy regardless of how it affects me. 
That is my basic guide to Love. Simply it has to do with I think and feel  
about what is best for the other person, without considering myself.    
When I start thinking about myself and how I will be affected or what I will get out of it, that is no longer love it is selfishness. Any thought about me, turns into self-centered concern. 
   When I give a gift, it isn't much of a gift if I am going to tell you what 
to do with it, how to take care of it, or put any limits on it. A gift needs to be  given to another so it is theirs to do with as they choose. They can use it or not, throw it away or ruin it, maybe even give it to someone else.  
   They may choose to put my gift on a shelf and not use it. It's none of my  
business, once I gave it away it isn't mine anymore. It's theirs to do as 
they choose.   
   Love is a gift. Once it is given it is no longer mine. It can't hurt me 
unless I have some kind of strings attached to it. Then it isn't Love it  
is some kind of selfish trade.