Site hosted by Angelfire.com: Build your free website today!



ARCHIVED NEWS - APRIL 2002

26/04/02

Heeee-heheheee!... Sheesh, wasn't I tired when I did that last update?... Anyway. I still think what I wrote though. It's not something easily explained, like the fundamental nature of universe or something.

So, I just had to remind you today how good it feels to be in vacation. Well, if it wasn't for that tiny lil work due next wednesday, I'd be finished with this term. And damn it feels good to evacuate all that stress and anxiety coming from that rushed last-minute studying. Anyway. Tonight I went alone (yep, say what you want) to a show featuring the very excellent local ska-punk band The Gamblers. Those dudes play some seriously ass-kicking shit. Too bad people were either too lazy, too stiff or (more likely) too drunk to actually appreciate the music as much as it deserved to be. Damn, I may believe that the show was actualy delayed to around 20:00 but damn, even then it's rather early. Maybe the fact that people actually began to drink at noon had something to do with their state, but whatever. So there was, y'know, like a circle of no-people around the stage? At the beginning I was alone by the stage, along with a small bunch I didn't know. It took me a song or two to warmup, but after that, nothing can stop me!! When I'm started skanking I skank to the end (which usually is until the end of the show, until my legs can't bear me anymore or until I collapse of dehydratation to the ground. Actually, the two last never happened). That's it. No break, no beer, no nothing. Maybe I look rather dumb or wasted dancing - almost alone - in front of the stage (and in front of about 500 half-drunk bored students thinking "What the hell is that guy trying to do?", "Heh, that guy's lost it" or something along those lines), but hell, why should I care. I came to have some fun. I came to skank to a great band's music. That's it. As time - and excellent tunes - passed, more and more people joined the fray until it almost was getting interesting at the end of the show. Bah, their loss. Yet, it sort of sucks for the band, who was totally awesome and delivered an excellent performance. As I was leaving, some guy congratulated me for my outstanding participation. Heh. Also, I spoke to some of the band's members who happened to be college acquaintances. They don't have any shows scheduled for this summer yet (which is a shame, really), but they're working on a second album due for this fall. Oh, and the lead singer actually thanked me for dancing too, if it can make you understand the situation better. :) Though it may sound desperate and actually sort of loser, their audience just wasn't the most trippy - nor fit - one.

Anyway, all in all, it was a good show. Two more weird bands were playing after The Gamblers, but I wasn't in a mood for waiting for them to set up. Even then, they just didn't look like they were worth the wait. And The Gamblers were worth my 10 bucks (CAN) all by themselves anyway. Way to go guys.

Someday I'll put some samples online. If I get their permission, that is. Support your local bands!! Unless they totally suck, of course. Then you probably should plant a nuke in their instrument storeroom, or at least spill some gasoline (or napalm if available) on it all and set 'em on fire. You'll do them a favor and save them a lot of time and humiliation.



Dare to leave a comment in The Useless Tome of Despair? *evil grin*


View My Guestbook
Sign My Guestbook


Send me a scroll!

01/04/02

On this Easter's day, I wish, oh I do wish so much life was as simple as believing in a so-called good Lord that would always be there to watch over us and accompany us in our miserable existence. Believe it or not, I just finished watching the new Jesus movie that played on TV. After all I've said about how much I didn't believe in such bullshit and about the general crappiness of religion, I am sincerly troubled. Yes, right now, I wish I could just abandon myself to your God, and know someone would be with me forever in my head, in my heart, in my soul if such a thing does exist. Someone that would be there to listen to me and help me with getting through this life. Somoeone so I wouldn't ever be alone anymore. But you see, I have almost always shun religion since my most tender age. It was the very subject I was worst in. It is the only one I ever got a D in elementary school while I then accepted only A's! I was tempted several times to believe. After all, that's what they wanted us to d o, wasn't it? That was the only way everyone could and did follow. It sounded so wonderful to be able to deeply trust such a loving and caring Lord. But it would be so easy, TOO easy to just abandon myself to someone that could comfort my sorrows and fears everytime and grab my hand and help me through every difficulty! Someone into whose arms I could just let myself plummet down and dream. Well, surprise, I finally didn't choose that path. But today, tonight, I wish I could trust in someone that would follow me and listen to me everywhere I went. Someone that would always love me whatever I did and, mostly, whoever I was. What that bearded guy said and did sort of made sense. I felt called tonight. I was again tempted to believe. Then everything crumbled in my head. I was ready to forget all I had taught myself as the only truth and slump down in His arms, only to escape the harsh reality and cry every tear from my body. Lost, I just kept listening to His words and watched as His story unavoidably unfolded.

Oh, I'm so tired of all this! All this nonsense, this madness, this... insanity! This damn life! I can't bear it anymore! I wish I could be like you and believe in something. But I can't do that. I just can't! I am here to live my own life, to face its difficulties, to bear and endure its dirty tricks it keeps playing on me over and over! I don't want nor need to be nursed by any god or whatsoever! I don't want to trust and rely on something I can't see nor feel and that would guide me through MY-very-fucking-OWN-life!! I can and will do that alone. Isn't it the very fucking least I can do? Am I not even able to do that?! Am I so weak that I need a greater power to get me through my little boring existence?

*sighs*

Damn, I wish I was.