Ok, so now i'm going to do the livejournal thing thanks to Holly. I'll give it a try and see how it goes. Anyhow. here is the link.

My Livejournal

DISCLAIMER!

In order to read this you must agree to the following three things... ONE These are my personal feelings spilled out, take them with a grain of salt. I wasn't thinking too hard when I wrote them, nor should you. If you feel you may be insulted by something, do not read further. I make alot of mistakes in my life and I say alot of stupid things, remember that when you read this. Of course, I don't say stupid things on purpose. TWO I always love email, so if you find something interesting or just wanna comment on a journal entry, drop a line. But be sure to stick to rule 1. If you count the number of times the word foog appears in these journals i've give you a bonus point. THREE Don't ever ever ever ever ever get mad/upset/depressed because of something i've written. Most likely I was just venting or expressing myself and I meant no harm. So if you have no choice but to get that way, either talk it out with my like a rational adult, or don't read any further. That is all.

So it's been a while since my last update. With no excuse really. This might be my last journal here as Holly got me this spiffy live journal code thingy I still need to do. Gettin hyped up for the game tourney, I will win again this year! mwahahaha. And the team format is allowing for some creativity. I think this could be the best tourney ever. Gonna have tacos for the food, cause well, everyone loves tacos! Played some DnD lately so its been a good week or so. Gotta play Dhu and he's always fun. And the high level PCs in my campaign are finally challenging epic level stuff. It's very interesting how hard a white slaad is to beat. But i'm sure they know that. Well, i'm gonna go. I'll do another one soon that actually SAYS stuff. buh bye.

Ok, it is both astounding and amazing that for two weeks straight now at least I have consistently updated the website. I guess that's what happens when you have free time like I do. I just added a new feature, my observations, and did a new movie review. All in all i've been in a half way creative mood the last few days, and I don't think the quality of my work has been very high. Hopefully you think differently. I would like to compliment KFC on an excellent chicken sandwich. The roasted chicken one without breading. All in all a decent sandwich, but the meat was a little too juicy. It doesn't make the top 10 chicken sandwiches in the world, but it is still good on its own merits. But the bun would get soggy if it wasn't eaten right away and one of the bonuses to a good chicken sandwich is staying power and longevity (not like 2 weeks, but at least a few hours). So i'm out of regular cigarettes now so i'm back to rolling my own. And i'm not too bad at it actually. I'm getting pretty good. This is what lifes all about sometimes. Having a good soda, a good smoke, good music, and relaxing. We all have to do it sometimes. I'm going to try to get a group together to play some DnD this weekend hopefully. Kevin is all hyped up and ready to play again (when is he not). So if your reading this and want to play Saturday lemme know before then! Or I might just give ya a call. Why do I have 3 pairs of scissors in the plastic container that is supposed to hold PENS! It's just not natural. I am officially addicted to Heroes of Might and Magic 3. It is such a wonderful game, and I don't use the word wonderful very often! You can even check, I don't think i've used it once on this website till now! Well, i'm enjoying adding all the new content, so I hope you are at least getting a little entertainment out of it. Be it any way you can. CRAP! I think Steph forgot to give Holly and Jesse that 5 bucks I owes them. Oh well, i'll give it to em the next time i see you, so if your reading this, we didn't forget! I hope the unpacking is going well, and congrats again! It's a wonderful house (wow, two in one day a record!) and I hope you love it. Well, staring at this piano poster thing is going to drive me insane soon so I'd better go play some more HoMM3 to distract myself before I destroy it. Peace and good will towards all moosen.

Typical day today. Went to VFG with Mel and Joe to play some Mechwarrior (as them and Skippy are the only people who play) and ended up teaching Mel how to play. Really makes your day better when you teach a prolly 35+ year old man how to play a game and win at it. He was really happy cause no one ever took the time to teach him and now he's decent at it after I tought him so it put me in a better mood. Me and Steph got like 5 whole hours alone tonight! It was awesome. We just had a little food, and watched a movie, in silience, no smartass comments, nothing. It was so great. I couldn't stand it all the time, but once or twice a week is AWESOME. Mitch came over and borrowed Castlevania Symphony of the Night, so I have shown yet another person the beauty that is that game. Best Castlevania ever by the way. Doesn't get any better. I'm in some kind of funk right now. I'm bored, but not bored. Anything I do i'm not enjoying, but I'm not NOT enjoying. Its messed up. Steph finally got her major all sorted out today. She's going to be a social worker and she's so happy she's finally found something she thinks she'll like, so I'm happy for her. Why don't people like Depeche Mode? I love em. It's amazing how many closed minded people are in the world. I hate all rap, I hate all country. Those are idiotic statements. You can't possibly hate ALL country or ALL rap. Some songs are just universal and have the right beat or that certain something that almost anyone can enjoy. Josh called today! He graduates tommorrow and is going to Mississippi on Monday to start his schooling. He will have internet and such when he gets there so he's going to email me. So if I gave ya the address and you wanna write him, don't yet. He won't be at that address for much longer. He seemed in a pretty good mood. I hope he's enjoying himself. I miss him. I can't wait to see him when he comes back for christmas. I just hope he isn't too lonely down there, and when he gets back i'll do anything I can to make it a great stay. Working on the scoring system for Jimmycon now. Cause alot of people don't have time to do the indy challenge tourneys so I'm lowering the points for them. Most points will come from the multiplayer games and the bonus games at the end. I dunno. I might just rework it completely again and let everyone vote on the games we play. I think that will be the most democratic way possible. That way I don't have to worry about time constraints etc. But the base list is still there. Screw it, I change stuff too much so i'll leave the standard games and extend the bonus round stuff if there is time. I'll just keep it the same, ignore the last three or four lines. I'm screwed up in the head. Hope Jesse and Holly got all done today, tommorrow is their last day to get out of the apartment. (today TECHNICALLY)I might just give em a call and see if they need some help. Well, I'm starting to run out of stuff to say, so cya.

Been a pretty uneventful week. I've been my typical idiotic self, and pissed of Steph by making fun of her movies. I'm going to have to watch one tonight to make up for it. But i'm not going to complain! It's all about the open mind tonight. Played some actual DND this weekend! It was great, I like to THINK the players liked it, of course I always do, but I always think my sessions suck. I need to get some people here for sessions. Aside from Jesse, Holly, Kevin, and Skip nobody shows up. Oh well, i'll be happy if I get four players once in a while. Better than none ever. For a special surprise, 5 bonus points if you tell Steph Jane Austin sucks! But you can only do this once, and it can be in person or on the phone, as long as she gets the message. I am amazed I am still updating the website. Its a truly amazing thing considering my forgetfullness and laziness. Gotta get the Jimmycon indy challenges going. None have been done yet or even started! Grrr. Ok, so i'm gonna get going. I gots to clean! Today's little tidbit of wisdom ... When choosing friends, always consider the ones who don't wear pink all the time. That is all.

I'm bored and full of energy, so before I go clean, here goes randamotron on winamp!

You love is like a roller coaster, baby baby, I wanna ride. Woaaaaah, my looooooove, my darling. I hunger for your touch. Last night I saw that beauty queen, she's getting high on Revlon. And what with god there, they asked him questions, like do you have to eat? Or get your hair cut in heaven? Don't give up, cause you have friends. I stop to think at a wishing well, about sitting on a carousel. Black Hole Sun, won't ya come! Won't ya coooooooooome! And I would walk 500 miles, and I would walk 500 more, to be the man who'd walk a 1000 miles to fall down at your door, surrendeeeeeeeeer! This is a public service announcement, this is only a test. Before you slip into unconsciousness, let me give you one more kiss. Here you go! Get the cool, get the cool shoe shine. And its one more night in Hollywood. If you think you might come to California, I think you should. Enguaged in crime I grasp my throat, enraged my mind starts to smoke, before some mental overload, angry again, angry again, angry! Well I don't know, but i've been told you never slow down, you never grow old, i'm tired of screwin up, tired of goin down, tired of myself, tired of this town. I've got the Dungeon Master's Guide. I've got 12 sided die. I've got Kitty Pride, and Nightcrawler too, waiting there for me, yes I do! Leave those...kids alone. Hey! Teacher! Leave those kids alone. All in all you're just another, brick in the wall. With Karate i'll kick your ass, from here to Tienemin Square, oh yeah mo.fo. i'm gonna kick your f-ing derriere. It's more than a feeling, to hear that old song play. She's a vegetarian oh oh! Poor little cow, little sheep, little fish how can I sleep. Carrot's are bleeding plants are screamin! He looked down into her brown eyes and said say a prayer for me, she through her arms around him, whispered god will keep us free. They could hear the riders comin, he said this is my last fight. If they take me back to Texas, they won't take me back alive. Face down in the gutter won't admit defeat, though his clothes are soiled and black. He's a big strong man with a child's mind, don't you take his booze away! Hey!

Ok, here's the deal. This will become a game. There are 19 songs mentioned above. You get 1 point for each song you can name (email me or tell me in person or etc.) 10 bonus points if you name them all, and 1 point per lyric error I made you point out. Good luck to everyone!

Today was a weird day. First we got the new furnace in, THANK GOD FOR HEAT! I tried to stay up till 8 AM so I could let the guys in to install it but that plan backfired. Luckily with their knocking Skip woke up and got the door and all was well. Slept most of the day away and then Kevin came over and we played video games and then Jesse came over and we talked and played video games. Wow, interesting day you say? I think i'm starting to like this web page updating thing. It might become a habit if I do it enough. Oh well. My journal sucks anyways. =) If you read it god bless you, if not, I know why. Oh yeah, and it is now my soul mission in this years game tournament to make Kevin a little b1tch. =) That is all.

Good god! Two days in a row, what the hell is wrong with me. So yesterday was a normal day. Went to the heroclix tourney and played cause they were one person short, but of course i'm judge so I can't win anything, but I won the tournament, Kevin got 2nd so he got the prize. Aaron is a little kid that shows up once in a while and even though he usually doesn't win many games, he is always a good kid in a good mood and friendly, so I gave him fellowship. (Good sportsman prize). I am going to be bored out of my mind tonight. Tommorrow will be VERY interesting for details I cannot discuss. =) Money sucks is all i'll say. Steph keeps pushing this Atkins diet, so I spose i'll give it a try, hell, I eat mostly meat anyways so how hard can it be. I need to get a smoke soon or i'll freak out again. I got the best score in Centipede I will ever achieve today. I'm not going to play it ever again because this score is THAT badass and I know i'll never beat it so i'm just going to leave it at that. But anyways, IM's flying up all over the place (a whole two of em) so i'll say bye for now.

Ok, so I at many points have promised to update this more often, but screw that, I am not adding a months worth of journals to this damn thing again, it SUCKS. I'm just going to try to do it once a week and maybe if I don't promise it this time i'll actually get it done. So today I played some counterstrike. And its about all I've been doing for the last week. I'm getting Jimmycon stuff ready too. Got the brackets done last night and got a new high score in Centipede (good luck beating THAT everyone). I haven't seen Jesse, Holly, Jacob, Jen in quite a while so I might try to see them sometime this week/end. If they aren't busy. =) Gotta go do the heroclix thing tonight, so I should start getting ready soon. I can't believe i'm actually updating the website! Oh yeah, and if your reading this Mitch. We're having the chicken and stuff tonight. Forgot to thaw it last night so sorry. =( But yeah, your welcome to come have some tonight. It's been a relatively peaceful last week or so. Aside from needing a new furnace. It's cold as ... Antarctica ... in here. Almost said hell, that wouldn't have made sense. It was like 40 in here the other night. Oh well, they are sposed to get us a new furnace and ac system this week sometime, the fackers better call too cause this 1 little space heater (thanks Josh) isn't working out too well. Oh yeah, and Josh wrote a letter and left his address so if anyone wants it get ahold of me, I got his address, he is doing fine. How did I manage to convince myself that if I drank Orange soda this morning i'm healthy? Cause its just like Orange Juice, that was my reasoning. Stupid stupid stupid. Maybe i'll have pancakes when I get up at 2 in the afternoon next time so I can convince myself it's still morning. While i'm still in a reviewing kind of mood i'm going to throw up some more movie and game reviews. So if your reading this, the site is updated quite a bit, and there will be new reviews to read so feel free to drop me an email commenting on them. I always love feedback. So untill next time I update (prolly JANUARY) good night/day/morning/evening/afternoon/sleep, etc.

So its official. Josh is going to join the Air Force. As I think about it it probably is a good idea, but damn i'm gonna miss him. Work is sucking right now. The Big Boss Man was supposed to come in this week so we worked our @sses off this week getting the store good and clean and then he didn't friggin show up! GRRR. I hate it when that happens. But we get by. AND I get the entire weekend off! That just rocks. HOPEFULLY we'll play some DnD this weekend. But I'll be fine just hanging out at home.

I'm writing this at work so every time there is a pause it's me helping yet another idiotic customer. God people are so stupid sometimes. But that could be written in a 1000 page essay so I won't even begin to try here. I'm hungry. Steph doesn't get paid till tommorrow so I have to figure out how to wrangle up something to eat tonight. I'm all alone at home tonight, that'll be interesting. I hate hate HATE being all alone at home. it drives me insane! Josh is in Omaha doing his test tonight, Steph is workin an overnight, and Skippy...well, I dunno where he will be. I'll prolly just play some Gamecube. I might even update the lesser updated areas of the website tonight. I've just been incredibly bored lately. And I lost my friggin book AGAIN so I Have nothing to read

This is going to sound incredibly vain, but oh well here goes. How the hell does someone as intelligent as me end up in such a pathetic position as I am in right now? I mean, I'm a very smart guy most of the time. Yet I have no college degree. I work for 5.25 an hour. I own nothing of value, hell, my net worth is NEGATIVE still. And I am 3+ years away from getting any sort of degree at all, and I'm not even in school now. You wanna talk depressing and missed chances, look at me. God it sucks being me sometimes. =) Ok. I'm done ranting about that. I'm going to go get some real work done, I don't do that all to often. So hopefully i'll get all this good stuff updated this weekend sometime. Remember. Don't ever sell yourself short and never settle for less than the best. Its not fun.

Ok, so i'm sitting here at work bored out my mind, and I realize, hey, what the hell am i doing? I got an internet connection at work and I can be updating the website! This week I have done alot. In typical me fashion I trashed the rather large amount of novel I had finished, and I am starting from scratch, but I finally have a DAMN good idea. I can't believe how good this idea is, you'll love it! I can't believe I even thought of it! Its friggin awesome! I'll crank out the first chapter a.s.a.p. and let you all read it, this time I promise. I'll post the first chapter and let you guys be my editors so just keep askin and i'll send you a copy (both of you who still read this) to read over the second its finished. Been watching the football game tonight, I missed football! Josh is movin in with us, so we've been having fun playin Madden 2004 the last few days. It's been hectic workin so much lately, but I stopped caring so its good now. Now that I realize I can work on this at work i'll actually update quite a bit now! Haven't played Meridian for a few days now. It was incredibly depressing to lose the guild hall (and most of my stuff) and then be Pkd and lose everything else in one day in less than like an hour! So i'm going to work my way back up. I now feel confident enough in my knowledge of the game to build a GOOD character. Ok, so I hope we play some DnD this weekend, but I never get my hopes up anymore because we rarely get around to it. Well, there's a customer so i'll talk to you later.

HAHA! I barely managed to squeeze this one in before midnight! Take that! So this week has been so-so. I've been workin my butt off because the boss is on vacation and he is too worthless to hire 1 more person and the other guy started school, so he can work like 3 hours a day so now i'm stuck opening and working till like 3 hours before close. I'm doin the boss's friggin job! I need a raise. I decided tonight i'm going to go to UNO (with alot of Steph's help) in the Spring. I STILL don't know what the hell I wanna major in, I got no clue. So if you have an idea let me know! I'm just going to get the last of my gen eds out of the way. I mean, my little brother Billy is getting a degree, its like mandatory I have to now. Not to mention I should have gotten it a long time ago, I just got sidetracked. I'm thinking either Philosophy, Physchology, Physics, hell, I don't know. I'm feeling old and don't know if I wanna dedicate that many years of my life to getting a PhD. I'll work on a BS first. And I always have a year to decide what major i'll take. If you have any suggestions PLEASE let me know! I got no clue! We played DnD Monday night. It was ok, it was a bit of a thrown together session, and I was using it to get back into the swing since I haven't DMed in like 2 months really. Hopefully we can start playing on a regular basis so I can actually keep my DM skills sharp. Gotta work again tommorrow morning for 9 hours. At least i'm gettin off at 7 for good now. Instead of having to go back to work at 9 to close. That sucked. I'm broke anyways, so I have to wait till tonight to eat. At least I got some soda now. Work SUCKS without soda. Oh well, i'll talk to you later everyone, i'm going to go to bed and then to work again in the morning.

From now on i'm only doing a journal one or two days a week, and i'll just summarize the half-week. =) Its much easier for me than to sit down a write every night even though I SHOULD write every night. Anyhow. This weekend was interesting. First we were going to go see Freddy VS Jason. We being, Me and Skippy. But Skippy was being an ASS about me not wanting to go for sure and kept trying to lay some guilt trip on me about i'm his "best friend" bla bla. It pissed me off to the point of not caring anymore. He still hasn't mowed the friggin lawn, and that is THE ONLY THING WE ASK HIM TO DO! Oh well. I'll get over it. I'm still thoroughly hooked on Meridian 59. Must...get...one..more..point! Online games are such crack anymore. I play em, and i'm hooked for at least a month. Gott go to work soon. Called in late cause I didn't feel like goin in at 1 and Steph had the car anyways. I'm just gonna say this once, and only once. Mug rootbeer kicks @ss. I definately need to do SOMETHING soon to relax. No DnD for a week, working 48+ hours a week, and getting maybe 1 day off each week sucks. I'm going to go insane. All I do anymore is go to the clix tourney on Wednesday night and that is just a bunch of kids and it gets ANNOYING fast. I finally saw Daredevil last night. Bastardizes the comics but it was still a decent movie. I can live with it, cause at least they didn't kill off all the villians! Well, clothes are about dry so i'm gonna go get ready for work. I seriously need to work on the DnD session. It is SOOOOOOOOOO close to done, but I keep changing things around and its going to take forever if I just don't sit down and say...this is how it is, and this is how its staying. Oh well, maybe we'll play again soon. I need to go get drunk, or play DnD, or just get out of the house and away from these people for a little while. I never see Steph anymore, so I guess "these people" means Skippy. He's not too bad, but god he gets on my nerves sometimes!!!! Ok, gotta go get ready for work. l8r.

Today was a WEIRD day. First, I got up at 11, fully expecting to go to work at 1, and I was worried if I could get the night off to go judge the clix tourney at VFG. So the boss calls, and says I can have the night off if i work tommorrow. No prob. So now I get the day off. =) Tommorrow is a 5 hour day so i'm not complainin. The tournament went good, except for one kid didn't seem to understand the championship meant the winner WINS. It was weird. I'll just have to start explaining the difference between swiss and normal brackets to him. =P The house is now officially clean. I love my mom. She took all weekend off to come over and help us get the upstairs done. =) And the living room looks kick @ss now. We reorganized it and got two new recliners. Good stuff. I'm just in a weird mood right now. I think i'm depressed. I get in these moods on occasion where I just don't enjoy anything, and no matter what I do I am just bored and depressed. I'm going to go to bed soon and hopefully i'll be better in the morning. I don't know if i'll have time to do anything this week, someone quit at work (i'm about to! blargh!) and so I have to cover their hours. God i hate work, its just not worth it for 5.25 an hour. Damn the man! Ok, i'll update the rest of the site after work (or if its slow AT work) tommorrow. Enjoy the rest of the movie. =)

Ok, I am FINALLY getting around to updating the site. I'm putting up random journals from every couple of weeks cause there were ALOT of them and i'm too lazy to read em. I'll just skim for important events and throw em on there. Don't want you all doin too much reading. I officially challenged Kevin, Jacob, Holly, and Jen to a DnD fight. Me with 1 20th level character and them with a 20th level char each. And I said i'd win. =) Should test my DM knowledge ot its FULLEST. Will definately be fun to see how it goes. I think i'm going to start playin Meridian 59 with Jesse. I'll let the world know how it goes. Hopefully I don't gotta work tommorrow so I can play all day. But i'm not that lucky. VERY hopefully I get some good news at work in the next couple of days. I'm going to start updating once a week guaranteed. If I don't make one change to the site per week and you notice it, i'll give you a dollar! Yup, you heard it here. A dollar! That adds up if everyone notices. But only if I know you, so if you are getting this link from so and so and click it just to get a free buck. no chance. Only people I know and have met personally. =) So enjoy the updates! They'll be flying in now cause i'm in a web-site kinda mood. I'll start putting journals up weekly too at least 2 or 3 a week hopefully. Tune in next week! Same Jimmy time, Same Jimmy channel!

I FINALLY got to play some DnD again. Its amazing how much that helped get my mind off of life. I had fun, of course I always do when I'm around the gang. All in all it was a good session. I need to get back to work on my "opus". The perfect session is what i'm shooting for and dang nabbit, i'm gonna get it hopefully! Well, being broke sucks. Steph quit her job. So we are INSANELY broke. I mean, barely enough to pay the bills. Without gas/food/smokes, or ANYTHING else taken into account. Its ok, we'll get by, we always do. I'm going to finally put the intro to my novel up the second weekend in August I think. And then I can finally find out if everyone else thinks i'm even a half assed good writer. So look for a big update in the first two weeks of August. I'll even put an annonymous critique thing on the site so you can say how much you hated it and i'll never know who it was. =P I'm going to throw up some of my newer poetry too prolly. Lemme know what you wanna read and i'll throw it up there. Oh well. I'm going to go read some more. Escape from the real world is sooooo nice lately.

Ok, so i've though about it for a long long while, and I haven't done my journal in like two weeks. And I think i've finally come to the conclusion that I feel a little better. I mean talking to her again has finally brought some closure into my life. Of course it has raised ALOT of new questions, but all in all I feel a little better off...I think. It is impossible to describe how this feels. I mean I was ready to propose for christ's sake. And that takes ALOT from me. Oh well. I also finally determined what it was exactly I lost when I came back here. My ability to love unconditionally. There will always be a seed of doubt in my mind when i'm with anyone. Even now, its in the back of my head. I'll always wonder, will I get hurt again? I'd better protect myself in case. It sucks. I had true love, and i lost it in a tragic way. And i will never again know how it feels. I lost a part of my life no one should ever be without. But am I really a better person for it? Only time will tell. Anyways. I'm going to bed. Work in the morning. Still sucks, and my P.O.S. car is still broken. Stupid water pump.

Well, another birthday, another year older. My birthdays are always so insanely depressing because I don't get anything. My friends always remember to say Heppy b-day so I feel better. Man I always get depressed on my birthday. Not to mention Big Yellow Tractor Wheel IMs me out of the blue the other night. Man that one hit like a brick. Amazing how grabbing you and dragging you through icewater for a few hours and then slamming you into a pool of lava reapeating it for a few days compares to getting hit with something like "I still love you and miss you and wish we were still together." God it hurts. I'm going insane. I don't know....I'm going to go think. Long and hard. "

I still have yet to update the site. =( Oh well, I will give you all a treat one day and do one MASSIVE update. I'm finally almost kinda sorta satisfied with the intro to the novel. I think i'll release it to the public some time in July. Maybe early August, I wanna get a couple chapters into it before I start giving out things people might want more of. I hope you all enjoy it. It's been a b1tch writing it. I think i'll just wait and see how the initial reactions go before I decide if I'm going to finish it or not. Oh yeah, and Darwin is dead. That sucks. =( I will miss him. He was my only DnD character I have gotten past seven. And only the second I have ever really played for more than a session or two. May he rest in peace. I know i've said it before, but you might not see some of the journals cause most of em suck and are boring. So I'll repeat it. (The Darwin part, just post commenting) Ok, bed time for me. G'night.

Ok, I feel like abolute crap right now. I forgot Josh's birthday! I am such a bad friend sometimes. I mean, he has ALWAYS been there when I needed him and i'm almost never around when he needs a friend. I'm going to have to learn to be around more for everyone. I dunno, too much shit has gone down in the last few years. Life is facked up. have you ever noticed how when your life seems to be finally getting back on track, something smacks you in the face again? And then it comes in hordes, cause the shat just keeps on coming. Work still sucks. I think i've finally convinced myself that i'm not going to be happy working at all. Damn my non confirming self! I hate society. A society that tells people beauty is a standard set in magazines, and that there is no room for change. If you don't work a 9-5 you're whole life and live like a good American you're a failure. I can't believe how bad people feel when they are insulted or they drop out of school and dissappoint mommy and daddy. It's sad really. Life is meant to be enjoyed, not to be played or perfected or anything. You were put here to have fun, and do what makes you happy. Except no one really believes that it seems except me, and even i'm starting to doubt myself. I can't really put my finger on it, but something is very wrong with the world. I see hundreds of beautiful women each day, who wouldn't even get a second glance in today's society. I look at them, and tell myself, hey, that is a beautiful woman, I wonder if anyone has ever told her that. It's depressing when I realize most likely not. We pass over beautiful people every day and move on to the "glamorous" and "society's chosen". Give me an intelligent, humerous, interesting woman any day over a "perfect sexy model" type. I mean, seriously. It's like I have said for a while now. Too many people are ignoring the present and worrying about the gift wrap. I'm gonna go before I piss myself off anymore and get so sick of society that I shut myself off from it.

Ahhh, the end of the month. And its been a long one. GOD ITS BEEN A LONG MONTH! Shit happens way too often. Oh well. Life is still good. I have now officiall rewritten my intro to my novel about fifteen times. I can't seem to decide on a solid intro. I want it to be great too badly. I hate making things inferior. I don't think I can settle for average in my own work. And I am by far and away my own harshest critic. On the bright side i'm writing again, I almost have an entire book of poetry done. Untill I freak out again and think it all sucks and delete it. Ok, i'm going to head to bed. It's late and i'm boring.

I finally finished the intro to my novel. Maybe i'll let you all read it sometime. Knowing me though i'm going to rewrite it 50 times anyways before I release it to ANYONE. Ok. I also felt a little sentimental and wrote some poems. They were decent. I'll get around to putting some of my work up on the website on of these days. The same day I get around to making a new intro page. Well, its almost graduation and Skippy is going to be moving in. Yay. =/ It should be fun. . . yeah.... i'll keep sayin that. Who knows, won't know till it happens. So I won't comment on it now. Aqua Teen Hunger Force is the current cartoon craze in my twisted little mind. Man it kicks sooo much @ss. If you get around to watching it, I highly reccommend the Mooninites. =) Jesse and Holly keep talkin up Clone High, I think i'll download one of those sometime soon and check it out. It sounds pretty funny. And I need something funny to watch. I've finally gotten around to finding a job. I'm working at Radio Shack. It's only 5.25 an hour but hey, its a job, and its something i'll probably enjoy doing. I just hated that drive to Omaha!!!!!!! But god i miss the money. =) Oh well. Money doesn't buy happiness and I of all people know that. I am in another one of those moods where I want to go back to Washington. At least to visit. I wonder what everyone up there is up to. I haven't heard from any of them for years. It always breaks my heart all over again when I think of her, and everyone else I left behind. I have to convince myself daily that I can't go back. I'm very happy with Steph, but its a bad habit to break, wanting the past. I can't really say if i'm happier now or then. I think i'm happier now, because I know i'll never be hurt again. Steph is the best. She treats me too good. I take advantage of that sometimes and I really need to stop that. I should take better care of her. I keep trying to distance myself, and I know now that I don't have to. Oh well. It's getting late and i'm gonna get some sleep.

Ok, so my journal's have been INCREDIBLY boring lately. You can't believe how insane it is reading your own mindless babble for two hours. Anyhow. I still haven't updated the site. I'm going to have to learn to keep my promises to myself. =) Oh well. My goal for this week has been to find a good friggin book to read and finish the damn books i started a long ass time ago. Ok. So I need to finish the 7 sword of Truth Books, all the Dark Tower Series by King, The Anne Rice Books (Vampire only), The R.A. Salvatore Books (prolly only the Drizzsdt books), and the other 400 books i got sitting around to read. This looks like mission friggin impossible. My current favorite song....Land of Confusion. Cause the video friggin rocks! If you have never seen it, find it now, buy it, download it, kill someone to get it, it is hands down the greatest video ever made!!! And I will defend it till the end of time!!! Ok, that is all. I'll be more interesting from here on out. =)

Ok, so for the first time in a good long while, I actually DID do something I was gonna do, kinda. I started writing these in notepad. Yay! And hopefully some some of these are good enough to show up on the website. Not much happenning today. Just another boring day. Ok, if this one makes it on the website i'll be AMAZED. I am so boring. Anyways. Just bored out of my mind, and watching some TV. Ahhhh, TV is so beautiful. It makes everything better. I mean, how good is life when you can actually not find something to watch on 200+ channels? Ok, i'm going to list my priorities in life right now...at least the minor ones. Here we go... Beat All the Final Fantasies, back to back, within a two week period. That's really it, i'm gonna be workin on that one for a while. Ok, well, i'm bored, this sucks, your tired, i'm going to bed. CYA.

Due to my insane laziness, and my desire to expose you to as little worthless babble as possible, I am going to begin doing my journal in notepad at least four times a week and to save you time i'm going to just put the good ones in here. I really am! Of course, i'll probably forget and have to add like fourty of em in a few months. Hehe. Oh well, thats the way the cookie crumbles.

Ok, I keep SAYING i'm gonna start updating this regularly, but I never do. Oh well, once a week is better than nothing. Ok, so first off. I hope Josh found a ride to Norfolk tonight. It sucks I couldn't be there, but work work work. =( Ok. I've decided, through my random thought processes that I am going to write a novel. Not really a "new" novel, as I have written 2 before, but a novel that i'll actually SAVE and not DELETE and see if I can get it published and al that stuff. Ok. So I might post the first chapter up here if I get enough people asking to read it. I suppose I'll find out how many people read this by how many people email or ask me about it. =P Anyways. Life is pretty good. Got over 800 songs on my winamp playlist now. Had Taco Bell for supper. And I am out of smokes. =( I'll have to get some in the morning or i'll go insane. Ok. So I'm gonna go. I'll try to get the first chapter of the novel up in the next week or two. Hopefully you all like it. I'll update game and movie of the week tommorrow too. See ya!

Ok, I wait entirely too long to update this thing. So I'm putting a sticky note on the computer to remind me to do it each day, like that will help. Heh. Started playing Kings of Chaos, and like everything else I play, i'm liking it, and trying to win. I made a links page so if your reading this, go to this page... Kings of Chaos even if you don't play and click on each link once, even if you don't play the game cause it will help these people out quite a bit. =) Thanks. Ok, that's all for now, I have a training class for my new job tonight so I need to get ready. I will talk to ya later.

Ok, today is starting out kind of slow. I had another screwed up dream. But it wasn't very interesting so I won't share it with you. I worked on my Neverwinter Nights module a bit last night. I realized I wanna up the production value a bit, so I've signed on (for free) a few artists and composers. I decided it will sound so much cooler if I got with custom made content. So i'm using all hand draw art and new music. It should add at least a few weeks to the end products release time, but I feel it will be worth it. I've taken an offshoot from the "comedic" lighthearted module and have decided to go full blow professional looking seriousness. In the end I just hope you all like it. I'll get anyone who wants one a copy when its done. Anyway. I'm still looking for the Tchaikovsky song. It's been 5 years now with no luck. How many songs can one guy have? Heh. I know, ALOT! But anyways. Skippy is coming over today. Haven't seen him in 3 weeks so it'll be good to visit for a bit. I need to scrounge up some grub. I'm getting a little hungry. I'll figure out what to do soon enough. I'll update you tonight on how a day in the life of Jimmy was spent. Read on faithful! Untill later!

Ok, she said it couldn't be done, and that I wouldn't do it! But dammit, i've had enough! Steph is now OFFICIALLY the foog's sister. Yeah, thats right. He has adopted another relative. He has his brother and now his sister! Oh yeah. On a serious note. Last night I watched what I consider quite possibly the stupidest movie i've ever seen put to film. I mean, it has a plot, as weak as it is, and the lead actress (if you can even CALL her that) has absolutely no speaking lines. So to make a long story short. Last night I watched the Piano (forced to actually) and in the end, it sucked ass, just like I thought it would. Now gimme some chicken, cause I'm hungry!

Ok, so me and the family went to the casino's Saturday night. And of course I lose all my money. And the one thing I got out of it? I would be rich right now if I had just played my Munsters slot machine like I wanted to in the first place. Instead? I'm down 40 bucks, Billy is down 40 bucks (but still buys the beers cause he's the man) Dad's down at LEAST 60 bucks, and Mom, good lord I know she dropped at least 300 bucks cause she is where me and Billy got our 40 bucks. hehe. Anyways, the lesson of the day is, avoid the dollar slots at all costs, play the quarter slots sparingly, and if you see the munsters, for gods sakes play the machine!!! That is all.

Holy crap! I wait way too long to update this thing. Ok. I know I am seriously messed up in the head now. Let me explain this dream I had first. Which is still VIVIDLY implanted in my head I might add!

Ok, so the scene unfolds (i'm not in the dream yet) and there are scared people huddled in a basement. In a side room (which is visible through a large window)there is a clown, a nurse, and a baby, as well as various surgical implements. So theres this older looking guy and he's looking in the window and crying. The clown, grabs a saw from the table, and starts lopping off the babies feet, toes, hands, fingers, etc. Its messed up. Well the old guy watching just says "Oh, those aren't really fingers or toes are they?" and there is blood spurting everywhere. (I later deduced the clown was trying to get the old man to tell him something, although I don't know what). Ok, so the clown gets a phone call, and leaves. He heads out of this basement and goes up two floors, and is in this big office room with all these important looking people of many different nationalities (my best guess is they are the UN? can you figure it out?). So they are begging the clown to stop killing people, and thats when they send in the best shot they apparently have at getting the people out alive...me. Screwy isn't it? Ok, so I'm all decked out in swat gear and repelling down this 2 story building, and I swing in an upstairs window, getting ready to head down into the basement. Well as screwed as the dream is already, I figure hey, lets turn on a lightswitch, and suddenly an alarm goes off. So I panic, look around a bit. And notice the backdoor is two feet away (didn't notice this before?) as my dream shows a cutscene of the clown freaking out and running to catch me downstairs. So I duck out the door, and I wake up...dream over. ...

Messed up, isn't it? my only analysis of this would be maybe I'm reading too much Batman lately and the clown is supposed to be the Joker? Hell, I don't know. Its just messed up. Anyways, I think thats about it for today. That dream was too messed up for me to think about ANYTHING else! Later.

Noticed today I got a little behind on my journal, so i'd better catch up. Thursday was a whole lotta nothing day. Just sat around bein a bum. Tried out Anarchy Online (they have a 7 day free trial) and its not too bad, doesn't seem like something I want to play though really. Woke up this morning and all I could think of is how badly I did NOT want to go to work. I find myself trying to convince myself to go apply and get this new job that I KNOW I will love so much, but I'm a self defeating person for the most part, and so far I keep talking myself out of it. Today's excuse for getting out of work? "I have a viral infection and the doctor said its highly contagious so I should avoid people for 24 hours" And technically, they even offered to let me have tommorrow off too. The way i'm feeling right now I want to, but I'd feel WAAAY too guilty if I did. I'll just see if maybe I can finagle my way out of it. Finalge, I'm not even sure if thats spelled right, but hell, you know what I mean. I am going to screw around all night now, and I have finally convinced myself to go apply at West Monday. Its a friggin two dollar an hour raise! And I get to screw around on the internet. Ok, so Mitch showed up and we hung out for a few hours and he talked me into it, but I did kinda convince myself, I said yes. Well, my pop supply is full, I might just get two days off this weekend I wasn't supposed to have, and I've got a great job lined up. Life is looking pretty good. =) Only bad part is I will be working either 4 till midnight, with Friday and Saturday off, or midnight to 8 am. I'm not sure which i'd rather have. Cause if I take the 4 till midnight job that pretty much rules out DnD untill this summer at the earliest (and prolly not then). And if I take the midnight to 8 am job, DnD is still possible, but I might have some semblance of a life at night. Free time will be good. God, why can't I just get a job with normal friggin hours! I'm sick of working graveyard or too many days to enjoy myself. I just want to work like 9 to 5, three or four days a week. Maybe even 10 to 6. That would be fine by me. Oh well, I'm rambling on now. I'll let you know if I got the day off tommorrow ... um ... tommorrow! See ya.

Work was actually half way decent today. No annoyances to speak of, so i'm happy about that. We played some DnD tonight, it went ok, but overall I felt the session was missing something, it was just a little boring to me. Of course I criticize ALL my sessions, its my job as a DM. We got done what I wanted to get done, so I suppose it was technically a successful session. Resident Evil is blaring on the TV right now, god I need to turn that down! brb... heh, God I love that part, you know which one i'm talking about, don't play dumb. Where the lasers cut the guy into itty bitty pieces. Damn that's cool. I'm incredibly bored right now, and I'm looking for a new game to play. The way I see it, I can play the Sims some more (which is always good, but gets old after a while) or find me a new online RPG. Cause Gemstone just isn't cutting it anymore. I'm gonna need some graphics I think. Well, I suppose I should go. Got alot of game looking to do. Need to pick up my check tommorrow too and go to Omaha and apply at West. I can't wait to have a job where the words "screw around on the internet all you want" are encouraged by the bosses! Its gonna kick so much @ss. Talk to you later devoted fanclub. Goodnight.

It's been a VERY long day. Worked on the website most of the day, got all the campaign maps up. Tommorrow i'll start the background story and hopefully get that up in the next couple of days. Kevin told me today he has Wednesdays off all month and wants to play DnD on those nights, so I have to try to get ahold of Jesse and Holly (you reading this?) and see if Wednesdays work for them. I spose i'm DMing this week too if that is ok with Jesse and Holly. They do need to finish the gauntlet. =) Of course, they SHOULD gain some levels first. The website isn't turning out too bad. I can't believe I finally got off my lazy ass and updated it, it needed it badly. Now I just have to finish it. Oh well, i'm off to a good start at least, hopefully everyone likes it. Got alot of good feedback on the Video Games intro today, so I know my work isn't all for nothing. I guess I should get a link to my email on here somewhere in case someone I DON'T know comes here and wants to comment. If you are reading this, and want to contact me but don't know me. My AIM Screen Name is Slithin, MSN is jon_the_dino@hotmail.com, and email is jforeman@rocketmail.com Feel more than free to drop me a line. I'm usually bored and wanna chat anyways. Well thats all for today. Too bad I gotta work tommorrow. But hopefully it goes quick. Talk to you tommorrow people. Buh-bye.

Ok, i'm finally finished laying down the barebones of the website, bout friggin time too. I need to redo the main page though because it's kind of bland. It is now 6 AM and I am bored, so I might as well head off to bed. Good thing I don't work tommorrow, that would suck ass. Friggin MICE!!! They are in the kitchen and you can hear em squeak once in a while and its pissing me off! We laid traps EVERYWHERE but they just keep coming. Either that or we have one super mouse, who is smarter than the traps and the cat. I'll just have to hunt the little bastard one of these days. You know what else? I'm sick and tired of cigarette prices going up all the time. Why the hell would I want to pay more so the government can build more roads? Or put more stupid commercials on TV telling me why I shouldn't smoke? I KNOW why I shouldn't smoke @ssholes, and I choose to anyway. Sometimes I think its out of spite to all those idiots who come up and "remind" me for the 5 millionth time that "that stuff'll kill ya". Stupid @ss idiots. Pisses me off. And while i'm ranting, why the hell do people change? I mean, everything was fine and dandy in my life five to ten years ago, and now its all screwed up. I've changed, my friends have changed, everyones changed. I just want it back how it was, hanging out with my friends all the time. I remember on a usual Saturday night like this we'd all be together in Keiferland's barn, drinking or playing DnD, or at my house doing much the same thing (or playing video games). Those were great times, and I don't think we'll ever see them again. To those of you who were there, and you know who you are, I miss you all, and I still love ya. That's it for this mornings rant, brought to you by nostalgia and tired crankiness. Enjoy. ~Jimmy~

Got plenty of sleep today, woke up, and Skippy and Steve came over and we played some Quake 3. Its too damn addicting. Got my ass kicked though, so I definately need to practice. Worked on the webpage for a bit. Made a nifty new video for the Video Games intro, god it rocks. ALOT of friggin work though, don't know if it's worth it yet. Skippy and Steph helped with it, so it turned out pretty good if I do say so. Listening to a woodman's theme song over and over, and oddly, it isn't getting annoying yet. I'm sure it will soon. Bought groceries today, so now i'm fully stocked on the greatest thing on earth, JELLY FILLED WAFFLES, man it doesn't get any better. Ok, gonna go work on the webpage some more. So i'll write tommorrow. This is the stupidest thing i've ever done, but I needed filler. As Jesse says..."Peace Out"