Ryoko- "Ok, Ryo-ohki, you can go out with Kin-ohki."

Washu- "If you call me Little Washu one more time..."

Ayeka- "Oh, I'm so ugly, your way prettier than me Ryoko. You should go out with Tenchi."
Ryoko- "No, Ayeka, your prettier, you should go out with Tenchi."

Kyone- "I want more snacks, please Mihoshi, can we get some more?"
Mihoshi- No! We're on a tight budget! No snacks!"

Sasami- "Ayeka, I'm not your real sister!(to self)Thank God! I am one with Tsunami!"
Ayeka- "Ok, Tenchi, call the patty wagon, Sasami has split personalites."

Katsuheto- "TENCHI! SASAMI! Stop sweeping! It's driving me crazy!"
Tenchi- "But I LOVE sweeping! I'm a neat freak!"
Sasami- "I only sweep cause I have to..."

Yukanojo- "Mihoshi, I'm glad your interested in the report on Kagato. It has some very useful information!"

Kiyone- "Is this a Rubic's Cube or what?"

Kagato- "Come to destroy you? No, I'm here for the air show! Like my ship? I call 'er Sonja."

Tenchi- "Anyone up for a game of tackle football?"
All the girls- "ME!"

Washu- "I will no longer create inventions to destroy the universe! Only to help it!"
Tenchi- "I will destroy the universe then!"
Ayeka- "And I will help!"
Ryoko- "I'm scared! Protect me Sasami!"
Sasami- "Get away from me you monster! Same to you rat face!"
Ryo-ohki- "Meow! Same to you!"

Washu- "Sure! You can all visit my lab anytime you want to!"

Ayeka- "Sasami, you really should learn to cook, bleh..."
Ryoko- "Yah, Sasami, this fuc*ing sucks."
Tenchi- "Send her to cooking school!"
Sasami- "NO! Please! Anything but that!"
Kiyone- "Grab her!"
Mihoshi- "Got You!"
Kiyone- "Good job, Mihoshi!"
Sasami- "Let me go or I'll kill you all!" Ayeka- "Shut up!" .:slap:.
Sasami- "Ouch! Ayeka you bitc*!"
Tenchi- "Tie her up!"
Noboyuki- "I'll drive her!" .:car starting:.
Ryoko- "Throw her in the trunk!"
All except Sasami- "BYEEEE!"

Kiyone- "Please, Mihoshi! One more song!"
Mihoshi- "ABSOLUTELY NOT!"

Nagi, Kagato, KAIN, Yugi, Sugaru, Hotsama, Matori, Suto Dad & Dr. Clay- "3... 2... 1... HAPPY NEW YEAR!"
Kagato- "Wow! This villans New Years party is great!"
Sugaru- "Lets do it again next year!"
Tenchi- (just walked in) "What the hell? GET THE FUC* OUT OF MY LIVING ROOM! ALL OF YOU!"
Suto Dad- "Go to hell!"
Tenchi- "Fine stay, but hand me a beer."

Katsuheto- "Tenchi! Get all of those damn free-loaders out of the house!"

Dr. Clay- "Someone stole my logo!"

Zero- "Damnit Clay! Of all the damn sluts in this house you had to pick his one for me to transform into!"

Tenchi- "YAH! 'Sailor Moon' is on!"
Sasami- "HEY! I'm waching 'Dragon Ball Z' here"

All the girls except Washu- "Where the hell is the muta fu*kin' toilet in this bathroom dimension?"
Washu- "Whoops... new I forgot something. Oh well, theres a bush in the corner ove there."

Tenchi- "Hey Sakua! Tell me about your past."
Sakua- "Well, All of my life befor coming to Tokyo I lived in Pennsylvaina, had 3 cats, 2 dogs, and a fish. blah blah ect. ect... (1 hour later) ect. ect. blah blah... I went to Penn State University and got a majoir head trama playing football so I was transfered to a hospital here in Tokyo, so here I am."
Tenchi- "ZzZzZzZ"

Sasami- "Tenchi, why are there all of these 'Playboy' magazines doing under your bed?"
Ayeka- "Noboyuki, why are there all of these 'Playgirl' magazines under your bed?"

Mihoshi- "E=mc2, what does 'E' mean?"
Washu- "God, I don't get this math stuff!"

Sasami- "Hey, Ryoko, I can make a mighty fine omlet out of that egg you got there!"

Pretty Sammy- "Ewe.. that perve over there saw me change."

Sasami- "Hey, Tenchi, have you seen Ayeka?"
Tenchi- (to self) "I'd better get rid of that corps soon." "Nope, sorry Sasami."

Tenchi- (after Ayeka sprained her ankle) "Aww... Grandpa! Why do I have to carry this snotty bitc*?"

Washu- "Mihoshi, would you help me with my homwork?"
Mihoshi- "What is it?" ::Mihoshi looks at the homework paper::
Mihoshi- "Adding and subtracting? Thats too hard for me!"
Washu- "Ok, thanks anyways. Im gonna go ask Ryo-Ohki..."

Sasami- "Miss Washu! How dare you play God!"

Tenchi- ~walking through front door~ "Hey sasami! Hello little Washu! Hey Kiyone!"
Ayeka & Ryoko- "Hey what about us?!?!"
Tenchi- "Nah... I don't Like you!"
~ryoko and ayeka run away crying~
Tenchi- "Hey how's about a game of strip poker everyone?"
Sasami, Washu, & Kiyone- "YES BABY!"
~all of them are sitting at a table. tenchi has only boxers on. everyone else is fully dressed~
Tenchi- "Washu... umm... got any 5's?"
Washu- "NOPE!" ~lying she saw all Tenchi's cards because there's a mirror behind him!~
Tenchi- "Awww SHI*" Sasami- ~wispers in Tenchi's ear~ "I'll help you get upstairs so you can get dressed."
Tenchi- "Thanks SEXY-SAMI!"
~later when Sasami finnaly got Tenchi upstairs~
Tenchi- "Thank you, you can excuse yourself as I get redressed!"
Sasami- "Nah... Could you slip in your condom for a moment please?"
Tenchi- "Sure!"