Cavemen Always Win

Cavemen Always Win


Chapter 5:

All of this is totally insane. It's been three weeks since the Powers that be decided to change Angel, the mamby pamby businessman, into Angelus of the nineteenth century. Three weeks is almost a month.

A month of having to deal with Angelus's innuendoes and attempts at seduction. I think I'm going to go insane. It didn't stop with the bed. I no he's playing me. I know he's winding me up and keeping me on the defensive. I can't help it if it's working.

I've decided to avoid him all day. He feed reasonably well yesterday so I think I deserve a day off. The offices are running as though nothing has happened to their fearless leader.

Ever since the negotiation that was made, Angelus has signed any and all papers with a smile on his face. Some times he has to be reminded to sign them Angel instead of Angelus, but other then that nothing has been damaged. He sneers at Gunn though. Sniffs the air when poor Charlie walks by.

Kid doesn't know what to do about it so he just walks along. so long as he's got his papers signed it doesn't matter to him although I think he'd like Angel back as much as the rest of us would.

Wesley hasn't asked any more questions. He's letting me deal with things on my own which I guess is a good thing. I don't think I could deal with his questioning. Lorne, oh poor Green Man, he's isolated himself from the group again.

He's thrown back more shots of whiskey then I've ever seen anyone do in such a short amount of time. He's not working which makes for a lot of unhappy movie stars.

And though Bossman is signing all the papers someone has to meet with the clients. Somehow that someone is me. I've met with more demon clan leaders then I ever did in my hundred years of existing. It's more then exhausting. I can't believe Angel does this everyday. I got bored in the first few seconds of listening to them drone on.

I don't understand why it has to be me that meets with the 'clients' and puts on a happy face. Luckily there aren't any meetings today so I'm just going to sit back and relax in the big chair. So what if I've got the monitor on and I'm watching Angelus intently. That doesn't matter. I'm lounging.

"Hello... Angelus." Wes was walking up to Angelus's cage. Illyria was with him. What the hell was that idiot doing? Especially with Miss I Used to Rule the World. Angelus fancies himself the leader. Likes to take charge he does. They'd end up killing each other if he and Blue got into a fight.

"Well, well, well... what do you want human." Angelus says in that same condescending tone.

"I just wanted to ask you a few questions." Wes says doing his big bad demon hunter routine. He's got a crossbow aimed at Angelus.

"Now, why would I do that. What's in it for me?" Angelus says looking out for number one as usual.

"Absolutely nothing, but you're going to talk anyway. It's concerning Spike." Wes says. Bloody hell, what is that little wanker doing?

"What about my William?" Angelus asks in a menacing tone.

"Your William. I was under the impression that Spike was his own vampire." Wes says.

"Oh he doesn't know it yet, but give it time." Angelus says.

"Well, that really isn't concerning what I came down here to discuss, despite what I think about it."

"Well what is the problem..."

"This is him. The one that the blond one talks about so intently?" Illyria asks.

"I... suppose." Wes says not sure as to what she's talking about.

"He is nothing more then a half-breed. Not worthy of such worship." She says looking disgustedly at Angelus.

"You better watch your mouth." Angelus growls.

"When I ruled your kind was squashed like worthless insects. You do not command me."

"Is this the way to gain my favor. Bring in some pretentious... whatever she is to threaten me. You obviously don't know how this works." Angelus says.

"Illyria is here because I asked her to be. She has nothing to do with what I would like to talk to you about. There are certain... facts concerning Spike's turning that are fuzzy. Certain errors that must be corrected. The Watcher's Council..."

"I should have known you were a Watcher. Concerning yourself with facts about vampires. Of course... it all fits. So you want me to divulge the secrets of vampire lore so you could write them done for future generations to read. Somehow I don't think I'm gonna wanna do that."

"I understand..."

"You understand nothing. How could you? You're just a lowly human. Food if I wasn't in this cage, but my William insists that I don't prey on humans. His blood is so much more vibrant though. I almost don't care that I haven't feed off a human in almost a month." Angelus says with a smirk on his face.

"I know what you're doing. You're trying to make Spike yours again. I can honestly say that I don't think you'll be getting him back. Spike's a very strong willed individual. He won't easily sway to your manipulation." Wes says. Oh how wrong you are Percy.

"You know nothing about our relationship. How it worked, how he needs me. To you it's a story to research." Angelus says.

"Why don't you explain to me the truth? You don't want me to go around thinking certain facts are true when they aren't." Wes says.

Angelus looks at Wes with a smirk on his face. "You're clever. You'd make a great vampire. All right what is it you want to know."


Angelus POV

When the human came in here with what looked like a demon I was ready to be menacing. It's not very hard for me. When he started talking about William I had to know what he was talking about it.

Seems this human is just curious about things. I remember him from the first day I was here. He was the one that thought Dru had sired my boy. Well I guess it wouldn't hurt for me to set the record straight.

"So where do you want me to start?" I ask. He pulls out a notebook and what William called a pen.

"From the beginning... and don't leave out any details... oh and speak slowly and loudly." He says with a... giddy look on his face. Gone is the fa├žade of a scary frightening man. Too bad, I really liked that man.

"All right, well William was something of a conundrum. Dru said he had power, but all I could see was a withering poet. He was a momma's boy. Too much love and devotion and emotion. He was just so... weak, but Dru liked him." I say as he scribbles it all done on his pad.

"So, you didn't like him at first?" He asks. "It didn't matter what I thought of him. He was set to be a minion. Nothing more then a babysitter for Dru so Darla and I could indulge in our carnal urges." I say leering at him. He doesn't bat an eyelash.

"Please continue." He says.

"So I agreed to turn him. I go to turn him, I'm following him from his home and he's going to some back alley. I'm intrigued of course. What is such an uptight little thing as him doing going to some alley with the filthiest whores I've ever seen? So I watched him. Watched as he looked them over with a leering eye. Watched as he picked one out. Watched as he led the whore by the hand down a ways and watched as he fucked him." I say.

"Him?" the Watcher says with a look of surprise on his face.

"Yes, him. I was just as shocked as you are now. He would go there a few times a week. Always looking worse for wear as he traveled the few blocks to the alley. Like something had happened to him earlier that day. It wasn't always men. There were a few woman, but not as much as there were men. It was a mystery to say the least."

I know I have a captive audience now. He's lapping up my ever word. Even the odd looking demon is listening to me. I'm remembering back to what only seems like a few years time to me. I remember William's face on those trips to that alley. How he looked fucking those guys. It's one of my most treasured memories.

"I couldn't turn him. Not until I knew him. I just knew he made these trips to that alley. I some him go to a different alley a few times to pick up what I can only assume was opium. I wanted to know who this man was.

"How he could be at a social gathering and acting like a blundering idiot, but when he was in that alley... confidence exuded from his pores. It was such a radical transformation that made my head spin. He'd go to on of those gatherings and after they'd used him as a punching bag he'd pick up some hooker and take out all his aggression on that person. It was lovely." I say.

"I hadn't realized that about Spike's passed. The books are certainly lacking in the details." The Watcher says to me.

"He kept his secrets well hidden. He didn't have a lot of money, but enough to hide his... transgressions. It had been a month or so after I had first learned of what he was doing. I had to confront him.

"It wasn't only because Darla was getting impatient and Dru kept talking about her 'Dark Prince'. I had to confront him because I had to make him mine. He was just too precious to let go. Of course I had to play with him a bit. So I came up to him in the alley after he was done and we had our first meeting."


"You certainly gave a good show." I said to him from the shadows I was hiding in. he turned looking much like that emotional boy who stayed with his sick mother most of the day. He was startled that someone had seen him.

"W-who are you? Show yourself." He said as forcefully as he could manage.

He was back to his old self. After the hunt, and I did consider it a hunt just not the same as I had engaged in, he was himself again. Small and cowardly. I walked out of the shadows so he could see me. I don't think he knew it at the time, but he had backed away slightly.

"I must say, that made a pretty picture." I said to him.

"Why are you watching me?" He asked. "Because you fascinate me. So proper during the day, but a little deviant in the night. Such a mystery." I said and he backed away even more

"What is it you want. Money? I don't have much, but..."

"Why do you talk so much. Can't a bloke take an interest in another bloke?" I asked.

"Not when it concerns my... personal matters." He said clutching his jacket in his hands.

"Is that what you call it. Your 'personal matters'. Is that what you say to yourself so that it doesn't seem tawdry and sorted. You like it, don't you. The power you have over another person. Knowing that their life, in some form or another, is in your hands. If they wish to survive they have to bow before your every whim." I said as I walked closer to him.

"I... I don't know what you're talking about. Look I just do this to let of stress. It's nothing but that. Now, if it's not money you want then can you please tell me what you do want so I can be on my way. Mother is expecting me." He said to me a hint of defiance in his voice.

"Nothing but answers little one. I just want to know why a pretty thing such as yourself has to pay for such company." I asked.

"I wouldn't dream of proposing such a thing to the woman of society." He said in an outraged voice.

"You don't seem to mind with the woman too much. Your urges seem to be a bit more... male." I said. His eyes lit up in horror as if he hadn't even realized he was picking out men. He fidgeted a bit before glaring at me.

"What I do with my time is none of your business. Now, if there is nothing we can discuss I would kindly ask you to get out of my way." He said to me with a fire in his eyes.

"Of course. Be on your way." I say moving aside to let him move.

He looked at me with a look of anger on his face. He brushed past me probably thinking it would be the last time we would see each other.

End Flashback

"Of course it wasn't. I went after him more because I knew. I knew that fire was always there. It wasn't just there when he was angry. It was always burning bright inside him. I knew he'd make a great vampire." I say.

"You just let him go. Why?" The Watcher asks.

"It's all a matter about timing. How far could I push him, how much could I tell him before he came to me... because at some point I wanted him to come to me rather then take him by force. I knew he would with just the right shove." I say.

"So it was a game?" "In a manner of speaking. Of course Darla had to spoil my fun. She thought I was spending too much time with William. So she sent Dru to 'Sire' him. Of course, as I've said before, Dru tried to Sire sheep." I say.

"How'd you know to be there. Were you already following Spike?" The Watchers asks in an eager tone.

"Yes I was. He had just come back from a party. He had tried to woo this girl who had told him he was beneath her. Stupid girl... didn't realize what he was about to become. I followed him down an alley. I thought he was going to go to the familiar one, but I guess with my presence he didn't feel safe.

"So he went into another one and just cried a bit. He tried to compose himself, but Dru came and tried to kill him... she was punished for that... I came just in time before all his blood was drained. I yanked her off of him and pulled him close to myself. I kissed his neck and bit into an entirely different spot. I drank the remaining bit of blood and then I turned him. After that I let him run around with Dru for a bit before calling them both back in and making him mine."

The Watcher looks slightly pale from my story. I didn't even go into details. I didn't even tell him how fun it was to break my William. How much he screamed for it to stop, but how he arched into my touch even as he screamed. How most of the time he would beg me to fuck him. How he'd some times get into trouble just so I would fuck him.

All the games I played with him before and after I turned him. I never fucked him before I turned him. I sometimes wish I had, but then again he'll always be virgin tight from now on. It doesn't really matter.

As soon as I get back to my time, if that happens, I'm going to be spending a considerable amount of time with my boy. Of course he's here right now. Maybe he's this Spike, but he's still my boy deep down.

"So, what did you do after that?" The Watcher asks.

"Well I was training him. Making him a proper vampire. It's only been two years. We've been a little... busy doing other things as well. My boy is a natural seducer. Of course it's been perfected due to my influence." I say. It makes the Watcher blush and the strange demon turn her head to the side.

"I see, so he hasn't even gotten his nickname yet." He says as he clears his throat.

"Nope... he really hasn't been out much since he was turned. Some for the hunt, but that's about it. I guess that doesn't happen until later on." I say.

"Well this information will certainly be most valuable to the diaries. Thank you for your cooperation." He says. He gets up to leave and the demon follows him. I'm not exactly sure why I gave him the information so easily.

"Have you ever... that is to say, do you plan on explaining all this to Spike." He asks as he turns around to address me again.

"What's there to explain?" I ask.

"The details. When I last talked to him he didn't seem to remember any of this."

"Either that or he didn't want to tell you. Maybe he thought the details were a little too... personal." I say thinking about how William probably didn't want his little human friends to know about his life before now. Hmmm, maybe this would turn out to be a nice little head game after all.

"Oh, well, I guess. Perhaps I shouldn't have asked then. Maybe I'll just keep this information to myself." He says smiling at me in almost a pleasant manner. I wonder if he knows what I was thinking.

"Wouldn't your... how do you put it... security already know. Is that not their devices?" The demon says pointing at a small black rectangular thing hanging on the ceiling.

"Oh dear god!" The Watcher says with a look of shock on his face.

"What's the matter?" I ask eager to know what scared the shit out of him.

"Spike... he heard everything." The Watcher says still staring at the rectangle. I decide to look at it as well.

"Hello William." I say to the rectangle with a smile on my face.


Spike POV

Everything. He told them everything. I'm sure Blue doesn't care, but Wesley... he told them everything! Every last detail of my life before being a vampire. A little bit about my life after being a vampire. Wesley looked as though he didn't want to hear any of it somewhere in the middle, but he was interested in hearing what Angelus was saying. He went through every detail of our first meeting.

Things I didn't remember hearing. I knew I should have turned off that damn monitor, but I had to listen to it. Most of my meetings with Angelus before my turning were so weird and obscure that I blocked them out, but not that first meeting. I remember that first meeting very well. Down to the sounds.

Finally they stop talking and Wesley looks as though he's going to finally give up the questions. I'm not sure if I should kill him or not. I'm leaning more towards killing him. Fuck Illyria and her God like powers. So he's walking out of the cell when he turns and says something to Angelus. I'm too livid to really here it clearly. Then Angelus talks again.

"Either that or he didn't want to tell you. Maybe he thought the details were a little too... personal." He says.

Oh, well, I guess. Perhaps I shouldn't have asked then. Maybe I'll just keep this information to myself." Wesley says.

"Wouldn't your... how do you put it... security already know. Is that not their devices?" Blue says pointing to the camera.

Wesley walks closer to the camera and utters 'oh dear God!' and then tells Angelus that I heard everything which is true.

It takes a spilt second for Angelus to catch up. He turns to the camera and says, "Hello William."

He's got that self-satisfied smirk on his face that I want to smack off.

"Hope you enjoyed the story."

Chapter 6

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