Click here to go to Click here to bitch at us for being so fucking insensitive Click here to get anthrax Click here to FAQ off and die Click here to see all the crap on the site Click here to buy mazagines Buy our stuff...make us rich! - our auction site Click here to go to Secret Porn Gateway!!!



October 8, 2000

See it?  

Those dirty, low down Republicans and their "Grand Ol' Party"...resorting to subliminal messages to get their man, George Dubya Bush, elected.

RATS adWell, how else could they do it?  The man has a shaky history with cocaine use, drunk driving, and killing more people in Texas than any serial killer or governor in history, yet 50% of the people in the United States still may just vote for him.  Why is this so, anyway?  Are Americans just THAT stupid?  Do they still remember Tipper's anti-rock campaigns, and now that so many Tipper haters are of voting age, have decided to seek their revenge in the form of a Bush vote?

No.  It's much more basic and primal than that, claims Dr. Wilson Bryan Key, one of may favourite writers on the subject of subliminal persuasion.  Every time I renew an interest in subliminals and wonder whether crusty old Dr. Key is still alive, he always seems to make a phone call or two to the press from his home in Nevada, regarding a recent subliminal scare.  Remember the Judas Priest case?  He was there as an expert witness (he always did hate rock music, thinking it was all corrupt and evil), and he has popped up again after the GOP has allegedly issued a subliminal ad campaign.

First of all, there have been subliminal innuendos to another Bush campaign, where image placement has implied things like "Bush wouldn't hurt an innocent bird" and "Bush makes pollution go away".  Couple this with the GOP's latest effort and what do you have?

Rats, I tell you.  Rats!!!

Rats?  Who are they calling rats?  

Oh, I see (said Steve).  A clue!  The democrats are rats...

Well, actually, the word you're seeing on the screen happened to be BUREAUCRATS, not DEMOCRATS, but the implied subliminal message is still the same.  They are all a bunch of rats. 

Believe in subliminals or not, they are thought to be powerful things, and it's obvious that something other than good judgement is controlling "the will of the people".

Powered by Live365.comLimeWire [FARK]The Onion, America's Finest News Source2001  Send hate mail to