Rory's Insignificance According to Altavista
The Brunching Shuttlecocks sometimes run a feature called "The World According to Altavista," in which they run searches for specific phrases on Alta Vista. The number of matches is a flawless indicator of worldwide interest in a topic. Since it has become necessary to put Rory in his place, I have followed their example with this shocking shocker.


Lance is so cool: 8 matches
Rory is so cool: 0 matches

I am a chef: 2,953
I am a bartender: 108
I am an ex-dragon: 0

I like long hair: 109
I like short hair: 27
I like pointy hair: 0

He's so smart: 273
He's so handsome: 200
He's so effervescent: 0

Love is all you need: 717
Monopoly is all you need: 0

I love Satan: 60
I love murder: 21
I love evil: 27
I love crime: 15
I love war: 34
I love pain: 61
I love magma: 119
I love rats: 59
I love falling: 41
I love slime: 10
I love dirt: 37
I love poop: 33
I love Rory the Ex-Dragon: 0