Sunday Night Heat

The show starts off with Shane McMahon introducing Vince McMahon. Vince shows himself winning the Royal Rumble and pinning Stone Cold Steve Austin the night before on the Titantron. He tells Austin not to make him go three and zero on him. "Austin, don't disgrace yourself. We don't have to have this match... allyou have is one last chance... I guaranteed no corporate interference, and I guaranteed you and the WWF will never be the same. I have big plans. I give you one last chance to break your contract." Austin doesn't come out, and Vince is mad.

A limo arrives at the lot, and this is the only mention of said limo for the rest of the show. No one knows who is in it.

Mankind is backstage with his former trainer, Don DeLucci, Iron Shiek and Bob Backlund. They're giving him advice on the match, in some really well done/funny skits.

Test (with Bossman) vs Viscera (with Midian)
The crowd isn't terribly into this match, which is pretty much as good as Mabel (Viscera) gets. Viscera gets the win because logically, any time someone who weighs 500 lbs splashes someone Test's size, the latter will not get up.

Billy Gunn interview: He's stepping up to the ref job on the Intercontinental match because he "looks good, feels good and can count to three. Not only are bribes accepted, but welcomed. Now I have to go take care of the night manager at 7-11." (what did that mean, anyway?)

Rock auditions women, and then sends them all away for not being up to his standards.

Lalwer is announced, to a huge pop (Memphis is his hometown, after all) as "the king, and future mayor of Memphis." He interviews Debra, who calls out Ivory and says she wants to change the tag title match to a 6 man match, so they can both fight. Ivory says no, adding that D'Lo and Mark Henry will win the belts and if Debra interferes, she'll rip all her clothes off her. (Gee, wonder if the crowd wants Debra to interfere?) the two then catfight, and of course, I want to see Ivory (formerly Tina Ferrari in GLOW) actually wrestle. So far, no luck.

Billy Gunn is backstage. he gets an envelope of money, and then Ryan Shamrock walks in and sits on his lap. Hmmm.

Tiger Ali Singh vs Billy Gunn (coming out to DX music with XPac and HHH)
Somehow, the ref gets knocked out and Val Venis comes out to make the count. Shamrock runs in and there's a bit of a brawl in the ring.

Mankind is backstage with Delucci, Sheik and Backlund. They're showing him to run the stairs. He does this, and then the Rock comes in and slams him in the legs with something twice, then hits him in the back with a wooden crate top.

McMahon comes out and starts to talk about how he is fuelled by his hate for Austin. " Those of you who say "i hate this" and "I hate that"...Unless you're Vince McMahon, you don't know hate! Austin, I loathe the ground you walk on. I will do this match with as much hate as I can! Now get out here!" and he starts to count to 10. As he's almost done, music starts to play- Not Austin's... SHAWN MICHAELS! Shawn comes to the ring, and gets in McMahon's face. "Hello Vin man, how's it hangin? You remember me, dontcha, long lost buddy? It's been said if you want attention, you whisper. There is nothing Shawn Michaels would like to do more than whisper 24 hours a day... but that would be a waste of my time. I'd rather take my fist and slam it into your big, fat, ugly face."
"Austin is hiding behind your degenerate ass," says Vince.
Shawn checks behind his ass, in typical Shawn style.
Austin comes out. Shawn keeps him from hitting McMahon. McMahon spits on Austin. Austin says, "I'm not going to wipe this off- I'm going to use your blood to wipe it off after the damn cage match..."

And with that, Heat ends.
St Valentine's Day Massacre ppv

The ppv starts off with a montage of some of the current feuds, with "My Sweet Valentine" playing in the background. It's one of the best openings I've seen in a while- black and white, just really well done.

Goldust vs Bluedust
Not a bad match, though short, and Blue Meanie isn't showing half of the potential he has to be a star. Nonetheless, it was a pretty decent comedy match, with Goldust spanking Bluedust, and other such antics. Goldust gets the win when Bluedust botches a moonsault. Then, Bluedust gets shattered dreams. (notes on this match: It's good that Goldust is finally waiting until AFTER the match to do shattered dreams, since he was getting a TON of losses from the DQs. Blue Meanie deserves better. Goldust was SERIOUSLY over.)

Al Snow vs Bob Holly (Hardcore Title)
The fight quickly progresses outside, where they battle with anything in sight, including a wheelbarrel and a no parking sign. Interestingly enough, they end up on the bank of the Mississippi river, and of course, get tossed in. They said it was 30 degrees there, so that's pretty hardcore. Bob Holly gets the win after rolling Al Snow in a fence. (My notes on the match: BOb Holly? Spark Plug? Hardcore? I think not. The match consisted of Al taking the bumps, and Bob just sort of being there, for the most part. What a shame. Why not have him fight former HC Champion Boss Man, and then flush the belt and division down the toilet? BLUE MEANIE VS AL SNOW! Am i the only one that sees this?)

Bossman vs Midian
Midian leaves his eye in a jar on the commentary table, and this bothers Michael Cole and Lawler a lot. The match goes along, and it's not horrible, though neither guy is particularly over, as was proven by the "boring chant." (Note: I hate when fans do that... now, I can't stand Bossman, personally, but I'd bever disrespect the guys in the ring like that). Bossman wins with a sidewalk slam, and then the ministry surrounds the ring. They all beat on Boss Man and then take him away. (Note: See what I mean about "the REAL job squad? (Brood excepted.))

Mark Henry/D'Lo Brown (with Ivory) vs Owen Hart/Jeff Jarrett (with Debra)
All the runour sheets said Henry has an injured knee, which was obvious since non-chest protector D'Lo did most of the wrestling. Mark Henry starts the match with flowers/candy for Ivory and then fights for a little while. Not a bad match at all. Debra goes to interfere when D'Lo goes for the Lo-Down, but Ivory comes over to stop her. D'Lo breaks up the fight between them, Henry gets in the ring, and Owen Hart hits him in the knee with the guitar. (Hence, creating the "injury angle") Owen/Jarrett get the win, and Ivory starts ripping at Debra's clothes. (Note: How does ripping Debra's clothes off hurt her? She takes them off for just about every match Jarrett is in, anyway.)

Mankind interview: "the Rock was trying to make his work easier with cheap shots... but I'm about to get myself in a state of mental preparation which will make me an ugly man, if you can believe that."

Billy Gunn enters to NAO music, doing the "oh you didn't know" part. (note: *sniff* I miss Jesse already) "here comes the peacekeeper... and it happens to be Mr. Ass"
Val Venis (with Ryan Shamrock) vs Ken Shamrock
Val's intro: "So it's St. Valentine's Day... let me tell you something, ladies, the big Valbowski has a heart on for you!" Billy is playing it up well in this match, not really paying attention, making slow counts, just being a general ass to Val/Kenny. (note: and that's fine: it kept the pace well, and kept me watching a Shamrock match, which is no small feat.) There are a whole bunch of two counts, with both Val and Kenny getting mad at Billy for the counts. Finally, Val gets into an ankle lock, but gets to the rope with the help of Ryan Shamrock. Kenny yells at her, she slaps him, he then pushes Billy Gunn. Billy punches Ken, shoves him in the ring and does a super-quick 3 count for Val Venis, the new intercontinental champion. Billy and Shamrock then fight up the ramp. Kenny goes backstage. Billy runs to the ring and starts beating on Val.

HHH/XPac vs Kane/Chyna
HHH does the intro for the "jacked up bitch, come get some" and when they're all in the ring, he shows her the Chyna Syndrome shirt he's wearing, which he rips off. Shane McMahon does commentary, and coins "X-Punk". (Note: Please, someone tell him he can not say that anymore. i wanted to shoot him.) The match goes on, with Chyna never spending more than 2 minutes at a time in the ring, and not doing much. (Note: I don't know why I expected to see her allowed to really work this match- god forbid a woman should fight men well... right? also, I think she could be really great if she spent more time in the ring working matches.) Xpac bronco busters Chyna, Shane comes in and XPac chases him backstage. HHH and Chyna fight some, and as he's about to pedigree her, Kane comes in and chokeslams him. He puts CHyna on HHH for the pin. Kane then helps Chyna out of the ring. (Note: they made Chyna look so weak in this match, it was disgusting. They're killing a lot of the appeal of her character when they don't even have her kick some ass in the ring.)

Rock vs Mankind (World Title) (Last Man Standing match)
This wasn't the best of all their matches against each other. Mankind starts off with his back to the rock, which made no sense whatsoever. He then slammed the Rock with the belt. They fight all over, in the ring, outside the ring, back in the ring. Rock is working on Mankind's legs big time, including knocking him off a table so his knee hits another table. Mankind goes for a people's elbow and misses. Rock starts to sing "Smackdown Hotel" and is treated to a mandible claw. However, Hebner is knocked out of the ring, therefore, by the time Mankind gets him in the ring to make the count, Rock is up on an 8 count. Continuing on, Mankind tries to lock on a Socko claw, but is met witha knee to the midsection. he tries again, and gets rock bottomed. Both men are down. They get up, grab chairs and hit each other at the same time. Both go down. Hebner makes a double ten count, and the match is declared a draw. The crowd (rightfully so) chants "bullshit" as both men are wheeled away on stretchers. (note: What a cheap ending! Ugh! Also, since when does Mick Foley get wheeled out? From a chair shot? This guy walked out after taking TWO 16 foot falls. way to work on continuity.)

Austin vs McMahon (steel cage match)
I must say, I was impressed. Vince puts his body where his mouth is and takes more bumps than his hardcore champion or women's champion have ever taken. Ironic, no? Austin and McMahon fight outside the cage for a good long time, fighting to keep each other out of the cage, then through the crowd, and at ringside. they climb the cage, and Vince goes through a table from the top of the cage. (Note: I can't believe he did that- insane, considering he's not a wrestler and not Shawn Michaels or Mick Foley by a longshot.) At this point, the staff comes out, straps him to a board and puts a neckbrace on him. Austin is almost announced the winner, when he says, "this is bullshit- the match didn't start- there was no bell. he won't lose that easy." Austin hist the people wheeling Vince away and then rams him on the gurney into the ring. Austin then puts McMahon in the cage and the match starts. Austin dominates, and then walks out of the cage. Before his feet hit the floor, McMahon gives him the finger, so he gets back in the cage and goes after McMahon some more. McMahon manages to low blow Austin. he then climbs to the top, but Austin catches him and throws him back in. (note: this is bump #2 that had me saying, "Damn!") Austin rams his face into the cage, and we see blood. Austin almost leaves the cage again, but a bloody McMahon then gives him two fingers. Austin comes back in. He stuns McMahon. Then, Paul Wight (the giant) (note: Cole and Lawler knew who he was! Bravo! Much better than WCW's "who is this guy" when Sandman/Jim FUllington came out) breaks through the canvas and throws Austin into the cage. The cage breaks away, and Austin gets out first. Credit the assist to Paul Wight. (Note: I am shocked this turned out to be one of the more interesting matches of the night. McMahon worked the match hard, and really put his all into some of those bumps. I respect that, because he did what the people who work for him do, and he did a damn good job. Now, that doesn't mean I want to see him in the ring every week- obviously, this would get old fast. But as a one off, it was good. I'll respect him more if he knows to quit while he's ahead.)

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