A good night of Raw was started with Shane McMahon addressing Team Corporate. Vince is in Texas, looking for Austin, so he's in control again.
Shane and the Corporation enter the ring, and a loud "asshole" chant greets them. Shane sends team corporate away and starts talking about how his dad and Austin will fight, and how he can take XPac. While discussing the match his dad and Austin will be having in the cage, he requests they lower the cage down. XPac rides the cage down and attacks Shane. Chyna comes out and hits XPac with a low blow, then holds him down so Shane can hit and punch him. God, does this angle annoy me in a markish way or WHAT? It's just wrong. the role doesn't suit Chyna. I really hope they have a way out of this.
Paterson and Brisco have accompanied McMahon to Texas. They've also taken on some cowboy gear.
Shamrock comes out to do commentary for:
Billy Gunn vs Val Venis
we find out that Shamrock makes all his sister's decisions, and that Val venis is not only corrupting her, but the audience as well. Inetersting role for Shamrock, as he's playing this "moral guy" straight off the Jerry Springer show. Listening to Lawler taunt him was great. Finally, he runs in the ring, hits Val venis with a chair and then gets out. Billy Gunn grabs the chair to chase him, but Val sees Billy with the chair and assumes he hit him, so he attacks Billy. The makings of a three-way IC belt match are firmly in place. And it should be a good match.
Backstage, Mankind buys Max Mini for $487. Very strange.
Rock calls McMahon to complain about Mankind spending his money. Lots of catchphrasing.
Debra interview: Mark henry comes out to hit on her, but Owen/Jarrett come out to beat him up. Debra smiles. Mot much to this.
Backstage, Mankind gives Kurrgan stock advice, and money with which to invest. Funny stuff.
D'Lo (with PMS) vs Bossman
Pms sets the match up, in order to pay Bossman back for calling Terri a bitch. D'lo gets the win, but PMS distracts the ref, missing the count. Bossman then hits a Sidewalk Slam and wins. Ugh.
Mark Henry comes out to help D'Lo.
Blue Meanie (!) comes out and does an "audition" to test and see how dance routines work on wrestling. he's trying out to be the "Raw Boy." Damn, this is cute. The audition is cut short by Goldust, who beats him down to the ring and sets up and executes Shattered Dreams. At least we finally have an angle for Blue Meanie- I can't wait to start seeing more of him.
Henry and D'Lo are talking about PMS in front of the doctor, who tells them Terri was never pregnant and that he examined her. Of course, I saw that angle coming a mile away, and I'm glad they started in that direction. Now, hopefully, we'll see more D'Lo in the ring.
SOCKO! shirt commercial. I really like the shiirt "It's not just a sock, it's an adventure." $25 + $6 shipping... ouch.
Droz vs Kurrgan
Poor Droz. One of the Headbangers got hurt, so he had to take this angle over. I suppose it's better than LOD's crack dealer, and anything that gets Droz some exposure is good ( I TELL YOU ALL, he's a freaking star!) but Oddities are pretty sad to feud with. Droz gets the win, using a broomstick to teh throat of Kurrgan. He keeps beating on him after the bell and exits the ring when the rest of the Oddities come out. C'mon, WWF, I'm asking nicely: Droz vs Edge feud. They were GREAT in the Royal Rumble. It would work. I know this.
Undertaker (in throne), Viscera (Mabel, with a name that sounds more ominous than it is-- call him "internal organs and see if there are oohs and aahs) and Midian vs Brood
Undertaker didn't bother to come to the ring for this match, which couldn't be saved by the much better than average skills of Brood. Unfortunate. Acolytes come down, and they get a DQ brawl going and then they all take out the Brood and hang Gangrel from a noose. I'd like to add that this is the second most "NO, NO, you suck, why drag these guys down TOO?" mark out moment of the night. The first was a misunderstood one. ;) we'll get to that.
Mankind backstage, walks up to Debra: "Debra, I bought you something for your boobs." Debra:"Is there something wrong with them?" Mankind:" No,nothing. As a matter of fact, I get a tingly feeling when I see them, but I'm afraid you'll catch a chest cold, so here's a sweater, gotta go, have a nice day." One of the funniest skits in a while, short, yet effective. Mankind comes out and does a fairly unremarkable interview, which turns in to a back and forth with the Rock. Foley calls him the "biggest horse's ass in sports entertainment" which had me laughing hysterically, and the interview led to a "Last man standing" match for the next ppv. Not for nothing, but can't someone else challenge Foley for the belt? This is becoming Undertaker vs Kane part 2. We've seen it all, and that matches have been great, but I want to see some more... something else. Foley is a god, and I LOVE seeing him fight, talk, or whatever he chooses to do on tv, but damnit all, I'm tired of Foley vs Rock. It's been what? 6 straight PPVs? (counting their IC belt feuds with Shamrock)
McMahon and stooges find Austin. Turns out it's a lookalike with a gun, who vince calls a chickenshit. Straight out of Ferris Bueller, but it worked.
Road Dogg and Al Snow vs Acolytes (Hardcore match)
Road Dogg changed the intro to: Hardcore champion of the world, ditched announcing Billy, and added, "and if you ain't down with me and this belt, I've got to words for you..." Nicely done. When Al came out and did the Head dance, I found it hilarious how Road Dogg jumped back a bit. The match is intense, with Bradshaw dominating Al, and then Road Dogg dominating Farooq. Then Farooq/Al made their way backstage and outside, while Bradshaw and Road Dogg fought in the crowd, taking some nasty table shots. Bradshaw hit a fan who threw a drink at him, and though some people say it wasn't staged, I say it was- they'd never have aired it if it were legit. Mabel comes outside and throws Al through a table. Road Dogg gets double teamed by the Acolytes and out through a table for the pin. Bah. Undertaker and the druids and the rest of the misfits of science come out.... I start screaming at my TV, "NOOOOOOO!" because if they involved Road Dogg in this silliness, I think I'd have to start watching WCW. Ugh. I HATE this angle. Luckily, they just unmasked the Druids to reveal the Brood. And yes, while that sucks, at least they didn't take Road Dogg into this crap. *sigh*
Road Dogg goes outside and finds Al: he's pissed that Al wasn't there to help out. Al doesn't explain what happened, and Roaddogg gives him two chair shots. Nice set up for their feud.
HHH vs Kane (cage match) Not a bad match- slow start, then the pace picks up. Kane goes to get out, but XPac slams the door on him a couple of times. XPac climbs the cage to keep Kane in, while HHH tries to get out on the other side. Chyna comes out and goes to pull HHH down, but he kicks her down off the top rope and gets out for the win. Kane is covered in blood, it looks like from his head. He bleeds a lot, though you wouldn't know, except it had dripped all over his arm. Looked pretty nasty. Chyna grabs the mic and seems like she challenges HHH to a natch at St Valentine's Day Massacre. I hope so. And I hope they respect each other enough to give us a REAL intergender match, no gimmick, no bull. A girl can dream, can't she? --pixie
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