The Monkees' Halloween Special
Mr. Babbit awoke the infernal pounding on his front door. He looked at the clock and groaned. He threw off the covers, grabbed his robe and stumbled out his room to the front door. He turned on the living room lamp and reached for his broom. He wanted to be sure he was armed for whatever weirdo was waiting him on the other side of the front door.
"Who is it?" he called in his demanding, nasal voice.
"It's Micky, sir."
Just what I need, a longhaired weirdo at my door, he thought to himself. He put down the broom and opened the door. Sure enough, Micky was standing on his threshold.
"Dolenz," he began irritated, "do you realize what time it is?"
"Yeah, it's eight-thirty," Micky answered perplexed at the question.
"It is?" Babbit asked surprised.
"Yeah. See?" Micky held up his wristwatch to Mr. Babbit. Babbit blink a little to get the watch into view then sighed.
"What do you want, Dolenz?" he asked hoping to get the ordeal over with quickly.
"Mr. Babbit," Micky began with a tad more confidence than he ever had when talking to his landlord, "what would you say if I told you I thought our Pad was haunted?"
"What're you talking about? Haunted. Really Dolenz, I thought you four had more sense than this."
"The other's don't believe me," Micky said. "But I was wondering about the past tenants to the Pad."
"What about them?" Babbit asked a bit hesitant at what the boy was about to ask him.
"Where any of them towel boys?" Micky asked.
"Towel boys...towel boys...nope, no towel boys. Good-night." Babbit quickly began to shut the door but Micky's foot kept the door ajar.
"Aha, you *do* know something," Micky said.
"Alright Dolenz," Babbit gave in and opened the door. "Come on in. I'll tell ya the story."
"About five years before you guys moved into that beach house," Babbit began to explain sitting with Micky at his dark kitchen nook, "a guy by the name of Jess Furrly moved into the house. He was a loner and he worked nights at a hotel in the men's bathroom handing out towels to everyone. He was a great guy. Paid the rent on time. Never made allot of noise. Good guy really. Kept the place up real nice. Never decorated it with obscene posters. Never painted the kitchen several colors. Never..."
"OK Mr. Babbit," Micky interrupted the man catching his obvious innuendo. "What about this Jess Furrly?"
"One night, Halloween night to be exact," Babbit continued, "he went to work as usual. The next morning I went to collect the rent and he was gone. I waited a week later and he was still gone. He never came back. So I started to clear out his stuff. I figured, hey, it's my place, if he ain't coming back, I'll rent it out again. Well, as the guys started moving the stuff out of the place, they noticed all these white towels in the bathroom. Then they noticed that the fridge door never seemed to want to close when they closed it. Then all this stuff began floating in mid air in the garage. Stuff like that. Well, I got hold of his sister who said that Jess always liked rearranging the garage, never closed the fridge, and always had white towels in the bathrooms."
"Did she say anything about a stuck breadbox?" Micky inquired.
"Now that you mention it, she did say something about him accidentally gluing a breadbox shut," Babbit mentioned.
"And did the breadbox door ever just float back up again?" Micky asked.
"OK, you lost me on that one," Babbit answered.
"Anything else I should know? Like how to get rid of him?"
"Well, you can't get rid of him. Believe me, I've tried. He would scare out people left and right. You've all lasted the longest since you guys are off at other places on Halloween. I'm surprised he came out this early. Although, he never did like guys with long hair."
"Oh, *now* you warn me," Micky said. "Now how am I gonna convince the guys our place *is* haunted?"
"I could help you," Babbit offered.
"You would?" Micky asked in an anxious voice.
"Well, it'd be ten dollars every day I come and talk to them," Babbit began. "And two dollars an hour after eight..." he pulled out a note pad from his back pocket. Micky slowly got up and headed for the door. "Oh and then there's a 15% tip..." Micky walked to the door backwards. Has his hand reached the knob, he opened the door and bolted out of the landlord's abode. "OH, AND THEN THERE"S SICK DAY COMPENSATIONS!" Babbit called to the boy as he ran off the man's property.
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