These Are For All The Star Wars Fans Ever Noticed These


'Get in there you big furry oaf, I don't care what you smell!'

'Luke, at that speed do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?'

'Put that thing away before you get us all killed.'

'You've got something jammed in here real good.'

'Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?'

'You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought.'

'Sorry about the mess...'

'Look at the size of that thing!'

'Curse my metal body, I wasn't fast enough!'

'She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid.'

'I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me.'

'Size matters not. Judge me by my size, do you?'

'There's an awful lot of moisture in here.'

'But now we must eat. Come, good food, come...'

'That's okay, I'd like to keep it on manual control for a while.'

'Hurry up, golden-rod...'

'I must've hit it pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up like that, huh kid?'

'Possible he came in through the south entrance.'

'And I thought they smelled bad on the outside!'

'Control, control! You must learn control!'

'Hey, point that thing someplace else.'

'I look forward to completing your training. In time you will call me master.'

'I never knew I had it in me.'

'There is good in him, I've felt it.'

'Hey, Luke, thanks for coming after me -- now I owe you one.'

'Back door, huh? Good idea!'

'She's gonna blow!'

'I think you'll fit in nicely.'

'Rise, my friend.'

'Wedge! Pull out! You're not doing any good back there!'


Sex Jokes

*Strip Club*
A man went to a strip club. When he got inside he noticed a seat conspicuously unoccupied in the front row. Seizing the opportunity, he took the seat.
As soon as the first dancer walked out, the guy directly behind him yelled, "Yeah baby! That's what I've been waiting for!"
The man in the front row turned around and gave him a dirty look. A few minutes into the show, the dancer did a move and snatched off her top, revealing two pasties. The guy behind our friend goes off again. "Yeah baby! Shake those things."
Our friend turned around and said, "Hey buddy, calm down!"
After a few moments, the dancer did another move, and snatched off her dress, revealing a very thin G-string. Again the man behind our friend yelled out, "Oh baby! You're almost there!"
Our friend again turned around and said, "Hey buddy, shut the hell up, will ya!"
A few minutes later, the dancer stretched out on the floor and snatched off both the pasties and the G-string, and the whole club went wild, except for the man behind our friend. Curious, our friend turned around and asked, "Say buddy, where's your enthusiasm now?"
The guy responded, "It's all over your back, dude."

*Dog Named Sex*
Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I would like to have one too!" Then I said, "But she is a dog!" He said he didn't care what she looked like. I said, "You don't understand. ... I have had Sex since I was nine years old." He replied, "You must have been quite a strong boy." When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I would like to have Sex at the wedding. He told me to wait until after the wedding was over. I said, "But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole world revolves around Sex." He said he didn't want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in his church. I told him everyone would enjoy having Sex at the wedding. The next day we were married at the Justice of the Peace. My family is barred from the church from then on.
When my wife and I went on our honeymoon, I took the dog with me. When we checked into the motel, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for me and my wife and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the motel is a place for sex. I said, "You don't understand. ... Sex keeps me awake at night." The clerk said, "Me too!"
One day I entered Sex in a contest. But before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just looking around. I told him that I was going to have Sex in the contest. He said that I should have sold my own tickets. "You don't understand," I said, "I hoped to have Sex on TV." He called me a show off.
When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married but Sex left me after I was married." The Judge said, "Me too!"
Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking all over for her. A cop came over and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the morning. I said, "I'm looking for Sex." -- My case comes up next Thursday.
Well now I've been thrown in jail, been divorced and had more damn troubles with that dog than I ever foresaw. Why just the other day when I went for my first session with the psychiatrist, she asked me, "What seems to be the trouble?" I replied, "Sex has been my best friend all my life but now it has left me for ever. I couldn't live any longer so lonely." and the doctor said, "Look mister, you should understand that sex isn't a man's best friend so get yourself a dog."