Eddie Mace, born in the Indonesian village of Jakarta in 1062 B.C., began playing guitar at the ripe age
of nine, when he acquired his first guitar, a 3-stringed prototype made out of bamboo, reptile shedding,
and long-haired yak follicles.  He began playing in earnest, and quickly developed an instantaneously
recognizable signature sound.  Much to the dismay of his wife, Momma Mace, he constantly played his
3-stringed instrument, except for when he would hunt the elusive mallards that were indigenous to his homeland.
One year later, his wife abandoned Eddie and ran off with a gang of Proboscis monkeys, never to be seen again.
Fortunately for Eddie, he didn’t realize his wife had left until several years later.  In the meantime, he formed
Fire Bad with fellow Jakarta-born bass player Tommy Freese, and the two quickly forged an extraordinary
friendship that would last for thousands of years.  Though Eddie was hailed as the “Village Idiot,”
he nevertheless mesmerized his peers with his God-given talent to play the guitar, which he affectionately called
his “Third Arm.”  After the initial popularity of Fire Bad and their hit song, “I’m a Monkey Man,” Eddie acquired
an insane amount of instruments, usually adding to his collection daily.  In 1039 B.C., he boasted a collection
of 3,094 assorted guitars, drums, and other noise-making implements.  When Fire Bad entered their
three-thousand-year hiatus, though, Eddie abandoned the instrument that made him famous, and spent
most of his days hunting and eating the various wild animals that roamed his homeland.  In the 1980’s,
he reunited with Tommy and Fire Bad for a tour, then later formed Right Turn Clyde with Tommy
after relocating to Berks County, Pennsylvania.  Why Berks County?
Said Eddie, “It’s the only place you can get really good bologna!"