GETTING LOOT
You think you know how to get loot, Landlubber? No. You don't. Only pirates know how to get loot, and only pirates know what to do with it once you have it. Here is my step by step guide:
1: Find someone else who has loot.
2: Kill them. Keelhaul them if you want to, and then feed the bits which
haven't sunk to the ships cat.
3: Take their loot.
4: Keep the loot.
This final stage is where amateur pirates often fail. Remember, Pirates, DO NOT PAY FOR ANYTHING! NOTHING! NOT EVEN FOOD! You either make your own, or kill someone else and take theirs. Loot should be kept in a big wooden chest with an intimidating padlock and a big, ugly (and slightly cryptic but tuneful) curse written on top of it.
