The Gene Mesaki Saga part III, by Mr. Sinister

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S3 sat in his chair, relaxing. The last week hadn’t been THAT bad. Shinji was back on vacation. Ai and Brandon were in their bedroom, having ‘fun.’ Duo and Chau were playing Nintendo 64, killing one another in Perfect Dark. Ryoga was lost. Every once in a while, his screams would echo up and down the halls of the 3 bedroom, 2 bath home.

“Dammitt!” Duo screamed, breaking S3 from his thoughts, “I LOST AGAIN!”

S3 sighed, “What now?”

“She keeps on killing me! I think she cheats!”

S3 grunted, “You’re worse then my little brother. You CAN’T cheat in multiplayer.”

Just as Duo was about to complain more, an alarm at Brandon’s computer went off. EVERYONE jumped. Brandon and Ai came running out of their room. Brandon was wrapped in a towel, which was sliding off slightly. Ai was dressed in a sexy black teddy.

“WHAT WAS THAT?” Brandon shouted, grabbing his towel.

S3 sighed, “An MST. Gene Mesaki part 3. My computer was on a 3-day countdown till the alarm. It’s time to go MST.”

Ai groaned, “You broke up MY fun-fun time for THIS?” she sighed, grabbing Brandon’s arm, “Let’s go. Might as well…”

Duo got up as well. “I’ll be back soon Chau.” He grinned, “Don’t worry.”

The trio stepped into the theater.

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>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> Gene Mesaki Saga Part III
> "Truth hurts or does it?"
> By
> Mr. Sinister

Ai: Ok, fill us in. What happened?
Brandon: I’ve read the entire saga. No need for me.
Duo: Ok… Last episode, Mr. Sinister liked watching us squirm, as he purposely posted up Gene and Sesami running about, and ALMOST doing ‘it.’
Ai: He didn’t…
Ryoga: [Steps in the theater.] Nope. He screwed Washu.
Duo: Anal AND pussy!
Ai: Eww…
Brandon: As long as Robert Z’Dar isn’t here, we’ll be fine…
Ai and Brandon: I’m not gonna ask how Ryoga got here.

>
>There where many clouds in the sky.

Ryoga: [Mock surprise.] WOW! I never knew there were CLOUDS in ANY of the ‘Tenchi Muyo!’s!

>Rain was dropping from every direction.

Ai: Man, I’d HATE to wear a dress or something… The rain, apparently, would go up UNDER the skirt!

>It was 10 am but it was a dark day. Winds coming in and not a single
>ray of pure sun shine. Gene awoke in his bed and looked out side his
>window.
>
>"What did I do to her?

Brandon: To Washu? [Pause.] You’re a killer pervert, with fascinations in the anal category.

>What is it doing to me?" Gene said to himself quietly. He woke up

Duo: He was ALREADY up!
Brandon: He could have fallen asleep again, then woken up again…

>and put on a pair of shorts and a undershirt. Then he ran towards the
>bathroom, he kneeled in front of the toilet and started to throw up.

Brandon: Um… Gene is a professional model?

>
>He flushed and then he cleaned himself. He took 2 showers that day and
>he brushed his teeth 3 times. "I'm so dirty, must get clean"

Duo: Should we… be feeling something here?
Ryoga: You go ahead and do that; I’ll just hate him. It’ll work itself out.

>He said to himself a bunch of times. Then he walked out of the
>bathroom and he saw Sesami standing there.

All: RUN! Get out of there Sasami!
S3: [Over the intercom.] Um… it’s Sesami.

>
>"Hello Gene, I heard some noises so I thought I would come and check
>on you"

Duo: YOU FOOL!

>She said as she smiled and tilted her head to the side.
>
>"Thanks Sesami. But I think I might be coming down with something.
>I'll go and ask Washu for help" Gene replied to her.
>
>"Oh ok Gene well I hope you get better soon. I made a special
>breakfast today"

All: Uh oh…

>She bowed down and walked back to the kitchen.
>
>Gene went towards the door of Washus laboratory. He grabbed the knob
>with his right hand and paused. He stared at the door and said "Will
>she forgive me?

All: Yep. You’re an SI, after all.

>She is one of my last resorts"

Duo: [As Gene.] …for hot sex.

>He said a little prayer to himself and he held his breath. He opened
>the door and walked in. He looked around and saw a very peaceful
>place.

Brandon: This CAN’T be TV/Universe! Washu has a quiet lab!

>There where water falls around and he saw Washu on her holo computer.
>He looked at the screen above her head and he saw a picture of
>himself.

Ryoga: Eww! Washu’s into porn!

>There was a birds eye picture and side picture and a picture from the
>front.
>
>"What are you Gene?"

S3: Didn’t we already establish this? He’s an SI.

>Washu said. She didn't even take her eyes of her holo comp. She just
>kept on typing.
>
>"I don't know but whatever it is, it's taking me over

Ai: [As Gene.] To Wal-Mart. There are some GREAT sales on women’s underwear there!

>" He replied. Then he walked towards her and stood next to her. "I'm
>sorry about last night. If this thing wasn't in me then I wouldn't
>have done anything to you last night"
>
>She stopped and looked at him " Don't worry about it Gene. Maybe next
>time you can be a little less rough on me"

All: AAARRRGGGHHH!!!!! DAMN YOU MR. SINISTER!

>
>"Say whaa" He said as he raised one eyebrow and looked at Washu in
>amazement.
>
>"Gene I think I figured out what your virus is" Washu said as the
>quickly changed the subject. Then she became very serious. "Have you
>ever heard of Vampires, Ghouls, Angels and Devils?"
>
>"Well yeah obviously. But do you mean that people have seen them in
>real life?"

Brandon: No shit. How, do you suppose, there are LEGENDS about those things?

>Gene said as he got really confused.

Ryoga: Look! It’s Ranma!

>Then he started to scratch his head. But he knew his real secret.

Ai: So, he’s really confused about his secret, but he knows his SECRET?
Duo: Damn well better have – it’s HIS secret.

>
>"You see since the start of time on this world. There has been a virus
>that changes people. Normal evolution is from when your kind.

All: Our kind what?
Duo: S3, WHAT is this thing TALKING about?
S3: Believe me, I have NO clue!

>The humans evolved from monkey to what you see on television.

Duo: So, we evolved from monkeys to game show hosts to humans?
Brandon: I always thought that they were just above lawyers, but just below amoebas.
Ai: Ouch, low blow.
Ryoga: I think that the fic means pop stars. I mean SOMEONE has to be able to explain all those hideously deformed creatures…
S3: Might work. Either pop stars, or politicians.

>
>But this virus changes that. Vampires, Ghouls Devils and so on are
>causes of this virus."

S3: Yes, you heard it here first! This fic actually tries to explain that politicians, pop stars, and lawyers are a ‘superior’ breed of human!
Duo: It didn’t mention leeches.
S3: [Sighs.] Oh… Ok, Lemon writers.

>
>Washu said as she showed Gene newspaper articles of people seeing
>monsters.
>
>"Hmm I think I know what you mean. Like there is a virus that makes
>people into monsters?"

All: NO SHIT!

>Gene said still scratching his head. "But I don't get anything at all"

S3: That’s what we’ve been saying all along.

>
>"Don't worry about it Gene. Just go stand there" Washu said as she
>shook her head to the amazement of Gene stupidity.

Brandon: I’m amazed at the stupidity of the author.
Ai: And the fact that this guy has no spellchecker.

>
>"Ehh ok" Gene said. Then he walked over to a golden star on the ground

S3: [As the announcer from Mario Party.] You ARE the stupid star!

>"I just don't want any anal prooooooobbbbbeeeeeeessssss"

Ryoga: [Grins.] I don’t know whether to be happy or sad.

>
>He got cut off as these metal tentacles wrapped around his ankles,
>waist and wrists.

All: Bwahahahahahahahaha!!!!!
S3: [Sniggers.] You know, after seeing that fic, I’ve got NO fear of tentacles.

>Then a black table appeared and Gene got strapped to the table.
>
>"Sorry little Washu but I don't play this way"

Ryoga: ARE YOU KIDDING? On one of my travels, I ran into this guy. He was busy dating Fred Lowe from Outlaw Star.
Duo: Isn’t he straight?
Brandon: HELL no! When the animators got pissed at Toonami for editing their ‘special’ characters, they made Fred rub his ear whenever he said something gay and homo. And Toonami edited it – so as not to bruise their precious children’s minds. Can’t remove the proof of the dubbing!

>Gene said to Washu as sweat was dropping down his face.
>
>"Don't worry Gene. But there is one thing" She said
>
>"Ehh what's that?!" He replied.

Ai: [As Washu.] Well… in your sleep you mentioned a name. Who is this Fred Lowe?

>
>"This is really going to hurt, and I'm sorry Gene"

All: DON’T BE! RIP HIM APART!
Ai: We’ve reached an all-new low – rooting for anal probes.
S3: I’m forced to agree…

>She said as a tear came down her left cheek.
>
>*Holy this girl has feeling for me

Ryoga: NO. She just wanted sex.

>or maybe its a tear of joy for getting me back for last night*

All: DAMN STRAIGHT!

>Gene thought to himself.
>
>All these machines came out of the ground. They where all little black
>boxes.

Duo: So… that’s where all the black boxes from those plane crashes come from…
S3: Duo… careful… 9/11, remember?

>The first one opened up and a robotic hand came out with a needle at
>the tip of each finger.

Brandon: It’s… Freddy Kruger?

>Then the other black metal boxes hovered closer towards Gene. Each one
>had a multiple number of silver metal mini tentacles come out of it.
>
>In the living room.

Duo: …and?
S3: Not too sure. I’m still confused about what that’s trying to say.

>Every one sat around the table. "Where's Gene?" Tenchi said as he
>looked at Sesami.

S3: …and she would know WHY?

>
>"I don't know but I made him a special breakfast as a thank you for
>the trip to the mall." She looked at Tenchi and frowned.
>
>Back in the lab. The box with the needles started to inject Gene with
>some kind of green liquid.

Brandon: …some sort of poison, maybe?
Ai: We can only hope.

>Then they took blood from Gene.

Duo: So… he’s got green blood?
S3: He’s a VULCAN!

>
>On of the boxes was in front of Gene and then 2 mini tentacles went
>towards his temples. On the tip there where drills. They drilled into
>Genes temples.

All: WOOHOO!

>He started to scream out in pain.

S3: And, no, you shouldn’t be feeling sad here. The author is trying to generate pity for Gene.

>
>"NOOOOOO STOPPPP - THIIISSS WASHUUUUU"

Duo: Fic’s stuck… again…
S3:ARGH! We need to get a better theater and projector!

>Gene said as he screamed louder and louder.
>
>Then all the other boxes started drilling into him. Some where in his
>kidneys, behind his knees, in his elbows, mostly everywhere around his
>body.

Ryoga: Um… not to be disagreeable, but isn’t that the ONLY place for someone to dig into Gene?

>
>Blood ran down his face. He screamed louder and louder. The sides of
>his mouth started to rip as he screamed.

All (INCLUDING S3): O.O’’

>The louder he screamed the louder it would have torn.

Ai: …so it didn’t tear?

>
>Then the boxes started to gather energy and they started to shock him.
>He screamed louder and louder.

Brandon: Ah! I recognize this! He’s going Super Saiyan!
Duo: [Leans back.] In that case, wake me up in a few years. He should be done by then.
S3: FAT CHANCE.

>
>"What's going on?" Tenchi said as he listened to the screams of his
>brother. "Is that..?"
>
>"Its Gene!" Mihoshi said.

All: THANK YOU, CAPTAIN OBVOIUS!

>
>The group gathered around the laboratory door.
>
>"I have to get in there. What's Washu doing to him" Tenchi said as he
>tried to opened to door. "It's locked"

Duo: Be grateful; could you imagine Gene nude?
All: [Pause, then shudder in fear.]

>
>"I can do it" Ryoko said as she tried to open the door. "Its too
>tight"

Brandon: That is wrong on SO MANY levels.

>Then she threw energy balls at the door and it still didn't open.
>
>"All we can do is listen" Kyone said.

Ai: Yay!

>
>Everyone looked at each other and no one knew what to do.

Duo: Well then, why bother? Get out the popcorn and go to town!

>Then Sesami started to cry and Tenchi started to comfort her as he
>tightly hugged her. Aeka tried to help out Sesami too.

>"AGHHH ILL KILL YOU FOR THIS WASHU!"

Ryoga: [As Gene.] YOURE MAKING ME NOT USE APOSTROPHES!

>Gene screamed in his evil voice. * Can't carry on* He thought.
>
>"Gene this is for your own good. I'm trying to kill the virus with in
>you"

Brandon: So, by killing Gene, the virus dies? I’m for it!

>Washu said with a worried look on he face.
>
>Gene screamed louder and louder.

Duo: WE GET THE DAMN POINT ALREADY!

>His cheeks had been ripped into 2

All: “2” what?

>and blood came from everywhere his body. His skin was turning into red
>it wasn't his blood but it was the same color.

Brandon: So it was his muscles?

>
>Washu stood there in shock. She made here holo comp come back up. Then
>she tried to tighten the restrains on him. He screamed again.

All: WE GET THE POINT!

>But the tone of his voice darkened and it didn't sounds like his
>normal happy voice.

S3: Ah… his ‘evil’ voice.
Duo: It’s not even menacing. More like…
Ryoga: Sad?
Duo: That’s it! Sad!

>His eyeballs turned black and his eyes turned into blood red.

Brandon: He’s got… [Dramatic pose.] QUICKSILVER MADNESS!~
Ai, Duo, & Ryoga: Eh?
Brandon: In the late TV show, “The Invisible Man,” the main star had a defective quicksilver gland. It released a poison into his body. For him to live, he’d need an injection of ‘counter-agent,’ or he’d go insane – and then die. It’s called just that.
S3: First, the entire eye goes bloodshot, leaving only the pupils black. The madness progresses through stage 3 and 4. Stage 5 happens just before dying, about 3 to 5 days later. The red turns to a silver. Then, after 24 hours, you die. Also, the Quicksilver shards that come off when he becomes visible again in that stage… well, they give others the second stage madness. It’s a LONG story.
Ai: [Brief pause. Grabs Brandon’s arm. She looks into his eyes.] Um… hon? Do YOU have this thingy?
Brandon: The gland? [Makes his hand go invisible, then visible again.] Sure. The defect? Nope. I’m fine.

>
>Washu looked at Gene and she couldn't believe it. She saw 2 cracks in
>his

Duo: -ass.

>forehead and 2 horns grew out of his forehead. His size grew bigger
>and taller.

Ryoga; He grew bigger. That’s all you need to say.

>His shirt ripped as his muscles got bigger and tightened.

Brandon: He had a shirt?

>Then his nails turned black and they grew longer and sharpened at the
>tips. She even saw a tail growing out behind Gene.

Ai: [Goes Super Saiyan.] DAMMITT! He is NOT a Saiyan! I, on the other hand, could KICK HIS ASS! [Does a cute victory dance.]
Brandon: [Rubs Ai’s tail slightly. Yep, she has one – Brandon doesn’t. ESPECIALY now.] Now THAT’S my gal.
Ai: Honey? [Yanks her tail away from him.] STOP.

>
>She didn't want to be around while Gene broke free.

All: THEN SHUT THE THING OFF!

>She quickly ran towards the door and opened it. Gene started to move
>back and forth and then he tore the machines apart and he broke free.
>
>He ripped out all the mini tentacles and he destroyed all the boxes.
>Then his body started to heal himself. All the cuts and scars started
>to disappear.

Ryoga: Damn, that was repetitive…

>
>Washu ran into the living room and she saw all the people listening.
>
>"WASHU What did you do to Gene?" Tenchi quickly said.

Ai: [As Washu.] Well… I sorta pissed him off. Hope you have your affairs in order.

>
>"I don't know, but my experiment went wrong,

All: NO SHIT!

>I must have miscalculated something, but there is no time we have to
>go outside now before he gets to us." Washu said as he hurried
>outside.

Duo: Gene can get outside JUST AS EASILY as you can.

>
>So Tenchi, Aeka, Mihoshi, Kyone, Sesami, Washu, Ryoko, Ryo-ohki and
>Nobuyuki ran outside beside the lake.
>
>"So what happened Washu?" Tenchi said as he was gasping for air.

Brandon: [As Washu.] Somebody set up us the bomb!
Duo: We get signal.
S3: What !
Ai: Main screen turn on.
S3: It's You !!
Ryoga: How are you gentlemen !!
Ryoga: All your base are belong to us.
Ryoga: You are on the way to destruction.
S3: What you say !!
Ryoga: You have no chance to survive make your time.
Ryoga: HA HA HA HA ....
S3: Take off every 'zig' !!
S3: You know what you doing.
S3: Move 'zig'.
S3: For great justice.
All: [Break out into laughter.]
Brandon: Gotta love the classics like Zero Wing.

>"He transformed" Washu said. Then she looked inside the from a
>distance.
>
>Gene got to the door but it was locked. He let out a loud growl that
>send shivers down all the girls spines.

Ryoga: Wow! They all have a collective spine!

>Then they heard banging on the door.

Ai: Jehovah’s Witness! Can we come in?

>
>BOOM BOOM BOOM Then the door broke free.
>
>"Tenchi I'm scared" Sesami said as she hugged his left leg.

All: [Taking out weapons of mass destruction.] GET AWAY FROM HIS LEG. NOW.

>
>"Don't worry Sesami, Gene wont hurt us"

Duo: Riiight…

>Tenchi said as he picked her up and hugged her.
>
>"Yes but I don't think that, that think is Gene" Washu said.
>
>Gene started to walk out the lab door dragging his tail behind him. He
>looked to his right and he saw the group stand there.

All: ARGH! Choose a tense!

>He quickly started to walk outside.
>
>"HEEE I MEAN IT'S COMMING" Aeka said as she made a shield around the
>group.

Ai: [Snorts.] Apparently, Ayeka finds certain death funny.

>"I will protect you Lord Tenchi"
>
>Ryoko looked at Aeka in jealousy so she said "I'll kill him now" She
>powered up and started to fly.

All: GO! KILL HIM!

>
>"NOOO don't Ryoko. Gene is in there." Tenchi said in a worried look.
>He took a deep breath then he said "Do what you can, but don't kill
>him.

Ryoga: And… we’re screwed.

>Make it your last resort" He shook his head and he couldn't believe
>what he just said.

Duo: [As Tenchi.] Damn… I can’t believe I want Gene to live…

>
>Ryoko looked at his worried face and said "Don't worry Tenchi it wont
>come to that" She turned around and saw Gene standing at the house
>which is like 50 feet away from them.

S3: Ten. Ten feet. TEN FUGGING FEET.

>
>He started to clap and he said "That was truly heartbreaking, now its
>time to kill you all." He leaned forward and started to charge.

Ai: Dammitt! He IS a Saiyan!

>
>The girls all charged up and got ready for his attack.

S3: Um… Only Ryoko and Ayeka can ‘power up.’

>Mihoshi and Kyone got their lazer guns and aimed.

Duo: …at the author.

>Aeka made her shield powerfuller.

All: [Snicker.] …powerfuller…

>She summoned her guardians and they helped out.

S3: Yay! Azaka and Kamidake!

>Washu was still on her holo comp and Ryoko made a energy ball.
>
>Gene got closer and closer he was 20 feet away then 15- 10 -5 then he
>stopped.

Brandon: [Strikes a pose.] Feel the dramatic cheese!

>He felt something right next to his neck. It was the blue light sword.

All: Sword TENCHI! SWORD TENCHI!

>Which looks and sounds exactly like the light saber.

Ryoga: [As the author.] Actually it is. We just don’t wanna be sued – by either Lucas or Sunrise.

>
>He looked to see who held the sword at his neck "Well hello there
>grand father, how are you today?" He said to Yosho as he smiled.

Ai: [As Yosho.] Well, aside from my arthritis, and my constipation, and… HEY! I’m supposed to fight you!

>
>"I felt there was a evil power but I can't believe that its you Gene"

Duo: Pssch. Congratulations. A winner is you.

>Yosho said to Gene. But he wasn't the old Yosho he was the younger
>form, the powerful one.

Brandon: …which don’t exist in Tenchi TV/Universe – or Shin Tenchi/Tenchi in Tokyo.

>
>"Look Gene is gone, I'm his evil side.

Ryoga: [As Gene’s ‘Evil Side.’] I’m Fredd.
Brandon: How is that evil?
Ryoga: [As Gene’s ‘Evil side.’] It’s spelled with two ‘d’s. That makes it evil.

>Ever since he was a kid there was a great evil growing inside him.

Duo: Man! He’s ripping off Digimon! KEN ICHIJOJI!
S3: The ONLY character I liked in that dumb series…

>That evil is me. Also its not just the virus that made him like
>this..." Gene said then he quickly jumped back 5 feet

Brandon: …a coward?

>and jumped towards Yosho for an attack.
>
>Yosho flipped backwards and he charged towards Gene. Yosho aimed
>towards Genes head. But Gene knew what he was up to so he moved his
>head to the right and then he digged and cut into the side of Yoshos
>stomach.

Ai: Anybody follow that?
Duo: nope.
Brandon: I wish… that I wasn’t HERE!

>
>After their attack they finished their jump and landed behind each
>other at a distance of 10 feet.
>
>Genes tail was moving from side to side. He looked over his right
>shoulder. He looked at the back of Yosho and said. "I know all your
>moves, there is nothing you can to do beat me, you trained me too
>well."

Ryoga: Like Obi-wan trained Vader.

>
>He looked down at his left hand and saw Yoshos blood dripping of his
>nails onto the grass.
>
>"I didn't teach you everything" Yosho said as he fell to the grass.

Ai: …even though he lost. Right.

>
>"Dad" Nobuyuki said

All: FATHER-IN-LAW!

>as he rushed to Yosho and lifted him. He picked up the light sword and
>threw it to Tenchi for safety. He put Yosho over his left shoulder and
>he ran inside.
>
>Tenchi put Sesami down and he picked up the swords and he powered it
>up. "WHAT EVER YOU ARE, I WONT LET YOU TAKE GENE" Tenchi yelled.

Brandon: Um… didn’t you hear him? He IS Gene.

>
>"What are you talking about Tenchi I could never hurt you"

Ai: Neither could either version of Kagato.

>Gene said as he looked at Tenchi.
>
>"Stop Tenchi I'll go first" Ryoko said as she charged Gene.
>
>"We all will" Kyone said. Then everyone except Sesami and Washu
>surrounded Gene.
>
>"Ha this is a joke." Gene looked around and he charged towards Kyone.

Duo: No, this is a joke. [Points at Ryoga.] Right there.
Ryoga: ARGH! Duo! Prepare to die! [They tackle each other to the floor.]
Brandon: [To Ai.] Ai, should we break this up?
Ai: [Thinks about it.] Naah…

>
>She tried to shoot him but she missed several times. He jumped side to
>side, and he dodged all her blasts.

Ai: ARGH! Those two sentences are THE SAME!
Brandon: Hey, Ryoga, could you finish that up?
Ryoga: Sure. [Strikes a stance.] HEY! DUO! Prepare for this! [Powers up.] SHI-SHI-HOKODAN! [BIG Ki blast strikes Duo.]
Duo: Aack!
[The blast misses, but Duo is thrown back into his seat.]
Ryoga: Good. Done.

>He got close to her pulled his right hand, clinched his fist and hit
>Kyone in the stomach. He looked her in the eyes and he watched Kyone
>spit out blood and run down her face onto her chin.

Ryoga: DAMN! You’re killing one of the best people in TV/Universe!

>
>He took his hand away from her stomach and he put his hand on her
>neck. He held her up. He leaned forward and stuck out his tongue
>trying to lick her blood.

Brandon: I can write something better then that!
Duo: Prove it.
Brandon: [Ahem!] Gene held his victim high. He could smell her blood, that sweet food of life. Keyone struggled against his grip – but it was like the iron grasp of a Gundam. Keyone knew that she would soon die. Her struggles began to cease. Gene, sensing imminent victory, extended his tongue to taste her red nectar. [Bows.] Thank you!
Ai: That… sounded beautiful… [Looks at him with dewy eyes.] Wow… I think you deserve a reward tonight…
Duo: Sounded like a porno.

>
>He got closer and closer. Then he got shot in the back. "AGHH" He
>dropped Kyone and turned around.

Ryoga: Keyone then shot him in the back. The end.

>He said "All right who did that?" He looked around and saw Mihoshi
>with her knees wobbling and smoke coming out of he gun.

All: MIHOSHI? HER?

>
>She had 2 tears on the side of her face. "Stay back!" She said "You -
>you are under arrest for abusing a Galaxy Police Officer"

Duo: Yeah, and I’m a gay Heero Yuy.

>
>"Yeah right like I will come in peace" Gene replied.
>
>He started to fly towards Mihoshi. He suddenly hit a little hovering
>log. "What's this?"

S3: It’s either Azaka or Kamidake. Or a piece of poop.
Brandon: WHAT?
S3: Poop. Log of crap.

>
>He looked around and he saw that he was surrounded by these mini logs.
>He couldn't move around. "What kind of trick is this? I CAN'T MOVE" He
>said as he got angrier.

All: MORE ANGRY.
Ai: Now, we’re down to grammar riffs.
S3: It’s too hard, ain’t it?
All: YES!
S3: Fine… I’ll skip ahead. Gene has knocked out Ayeka. He’s about to kill someone else.
Duo: That’s it?
S3: But… well, Azaka and Kamidake are killed in ONE sentence.
All: DAMN YOU MR. SINISTER!

>
>But just before he attacked Sesami got in the way and he cut hit her
>in the in the chest. On her left side over her heart.

Duo: I’m not up on my anatomy, but wouldn’t that be… the collarbone?
Ai: Sounds like it.
Ryoga: Well then, she’s fine!

>
>"Noooooo" Gene screamed. as he fell to the floor and he took his hand
>out of Sesami.

Brandon: HAND? He sliced Sasami with his HAND?
Ryoga: Better trim those nails.

>He wrapped his hands around her. "Sesami please don't die, I'm sorry"

Ai: [As Sasami.] DAMN STRAIGHT YOU’D BETTER BE SORRY! You just KILLED the CUTEST character in Tenchi! If I die, then the show DIES! Besides that, YOU LOVE ME! WHY DID YOU KILL ME NOW, HUH?

>
>Tenchi looked at Sesames dying body.
>
>His eyes opened wide

Brandon: Our hero: a narcoleptic.

>and he charged at Gene. He held his sword back and then he cut of
>Genes head.

S3: OH MY GOD! THE SI DIED! Wait… no… nevermind.
Ryoga: ‘course. He’s an SI.

>His head flew up 2 feet and rolled in the air as it feel onto the
>ground. Blood came squirting into the air out of Gene body.

Duo: And now, Gene’s an EVA.

>
>Tenchi took Sesami out of Genes arms and he held her tightly. Washu
>came running towards them. "Do something Washu , make her come back."
>
>Tenchi said to Washu as he cried. He gave little taps onto Sesames
>cheeks

Ai: Um… Tenchi? She’s not a computer.
Brandon: [As Sasami-computer.] Fatal systems err. Reboot? Y/N

>"Please wake up Sesami don't die on me I never told you how I feel
>about you Sesami"

All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

>
>Sesami slowly opened her eyes and looked at Tenchi. "Teeenchiiiii"

S3: Hold on, the pause button is stuck. [Swear words and button smashing is heard.] There…

>Sesami said slowly.

Ai: And, now they’re trying to pass this off as touching.
Ryoga: [Sobbing.] Oh… Death scenes always get me choked up. [Choke.] Give me a kleenex…

>
>"I love you Sesami, I always have. I want you Sesami to be by my side
>forever. I LOVE YOU" Tenchi said as his tears fell on Sesami.

All: PEDOPHILE!

>
>"Tenchi I loooovvvvv........

Ryoga: [As Sasami… er, Sesami.] -ve… the Gamecube. Microsoft is a bunch of assholes…

>" Sesami said as her eyes closed and she died.

All: WHAT?
Duo: NEXT, HE’LL KILL OFF RYOKO!
Brandon: OR, AZAKA AND KAMIDAKE!
S3: Um… he already killed the guardians.
Brandon: Crap.

>
>"NOOOOOOOO" Tenchi said as he looked into the sky, "This isn't right"

Ai: Wow. Something we agree with.

>He said to himself.
>
>"Tenchi what about meee?" Ryoko said to Tenchi as she cried and faded
>away.

Brandon: Lack of love kills? Ouch.
Ai: [Glomps Brandon.] You’d better not let that happen to me!

>
>"No wait Ryoko" Tenchi said as he put Sesami down and got up. "Bring
>them back Washu all of them" Tenchi said to Washu

Duo: …but Ryoko’s not dead. She just got upset and ran off. Again.

>
>"I can't do anything Tenchi" Washu replied to Tenchi as she looked
>down at Sesami.

S3: AH-HA! Proof at last! This is Shin Tenchi! In that one, Washu did squat!

>
>Tenchi walked slowly towards Washu and he slapped her across the face.
>"You supposed to be the greatest scientist in the Universe"

Duo: [As Tenchi.] All my base are belong to you!

>He said to her as he shook his head.
>
>He turned around and kneed in front of Sesamis dead body. He put his
>hand together and he closed his eyes and started to pray. "Please
>Tsunami, Come here and do something"

All: There IS no Tsunami. This is Shin or TV. You’re praying to a dead idea.

>
>Washu put her hand on her face and she started to cry. She looked
>around and saw Mihoshi holding Kyone and crying.

Brandon: NO SHIT! She was almost killed!

>Then she saw Aeka and went to aid her.
>
>Tenchi heard a noise and he slowly opened his eyes and he looked
>forward. He saw a red flame appear and it slowly drew into a giant
>ring of fire.

All: Fire. It’s Satan.

>Then inside the fire started to twirl like a portal.

All: Satan.

>Tenchis eyes opened wide he couldn't believe it.

Duo: What, that Satan is coming to see Gene?

>
>Slowly someone started to walk out of the portal or fire.

All: Satan.

>Tenchi first saw the shoes of the man. He wore black dressing up
>shoes. Tenchi started to look up and he saw that the man was wearing a
>sharp looking suit.

Brandon: Ah! Satan is a lawyer!
Ai: No surprise there.

>Tenchi looked up at the man face and paused.
>
>"Whhhaaaaatt who are you?" Tenchi said as he started to shake. He
>looked at the man and he looked a bit like Genes Evil form.

Ryoga: What? Satan looks like a dumbass?

>
>But the man was less muscular. He had short hair. His eyes had a v
>shape. He had a pointing noise.

Duo: It finds fresh souls.

>A mustache and hair under his lower lip. The mans eyebrows also formed
>another v.

All: WE GET THE IDEA! Vs ARE ALL OVER THIS SATAN!

>
>"Who are you?"

All: SATAN! SATAN! Did you not hear us?

>Tenchi said knowing that he will regret that question. The man was
>also blood red with horns. He had a cigar in his mouth.

Ai: Hmm… MORE proof that smoking is BAD.

>
>He took a deep breath and inhaled. Then he walked towards Genes dead
>body and he exhaled. "You know Tenchi after Gene left this house he
>wasn't able to survive at such a young age. He virtually sold his sold
>to me to survive to see you again and to

S3: Kill you?

>find true love."

Brandon: [As Tenchi.] So… who are you again?

>
>The strange man said while he looked over to Tenchi. He smiled and
>inhaled again. "And the virus that lived inside him would have made
>him a perfect leader in my armies against heaven."

Duo: Uh...does AIDS make you some sort of superman now?
S3: That crack’s been done – by Ken of Digimon, no less.

>"Hold on... You're thh-th-the Dev" Tenchi said as he stuttered.

Brandon: [As Pyro, from Megatokyo.com] Th-th-the Developer of Daikatana: John Romero!
Duo: Get me the Necrowombicon! [It (An old, aged book. Brown cover. Wombat/Koala on the cover.) actually appears in his hands.] COOL!

>"I have many names but I am mostly known either as the Devil or as I
>prefer, Satan. That's what you will call me" Satan said to Tenchi.

S3: You know, now I have NO RESPECT for Satan.

>"Well it looks like you won Tsunami, You won the bet. Tenchi does love
>Sesami the most."

All: WHAT?

>
>He said as he looked up at a cloud that was hovering over everyone.
>
>"Tsunami?" Tenchi said to himself.

All: WHAT?

>
>"That's right Tenchi its me" Everyone looked up and saw the cloud form
>into Tsunami.

All: THIS IS TENCHI TV (or Tenchi Universe…)! …or Shin. THERE IS NO TSUNAMI!

>She slowly hovered towards the ground and she stood next to Tenchi.
>"It looks like you owe me Satan" She looked straight into the Devils
>eyes.
>
>"I don't think so Tsunami" Satan said as grinned with evil.

Duo: [Raises an eyebrow.] Is there any other sort of way for the lord of darkness to smile?
Brandon: [Shivers.] I’d hate to see a happy Satan…

>
>"I win Tenchi loves Sesami" Tsunami said as she started to get angry
>with Satan.
>
>"Yes but our bet was that Sesami will find her true love. Right?"

Ai: Um… sorry to interrupt, or offend, but Sasami is 9 YEARS OLD. She probably isn’t that knowledgeable in love.
S3: I’m 16, and I’m not even CLOSE to getting a girl! I have to agree.

>Satan said
>
>"That's right" Tsunami replied.
>
>"You see I don't care if Tenchi loves her but Sesami has to love him
>back.

S3: She loves Gene. He’s a SI. It’s obvious.

>She never said that she loves him." Satan said.
>
>"Yes she did" Tsunami said

Brandon: Actually, she said, [As Sesami.] “I looooovvvvvv……” That’s it. No ‘love.’

>
>"I'll show you!" Satan put took his cigar with his left hand and then
>he raised his right hand. He wiggled his fingers and said "Aghra-
>Marhra- Shim Sharoom"

Duo: [Looks through the Necrowombicon.] Hmm… I wanna try one of these summoning spells… [Looks up.] SUPERCALIFRAGAlISTICEXPALIDOCIOUS!
[Bright light fills the room.]
Brandon: It’s…
Ai: It’s…
Duo: Whoa…
Ryoga: It’s…
All: [in fear.] AN ATARI 2600!
S3: EVIL! GET IT AWAY!
Duo: Um… [Frantically flipping through the pages.]
Brandon: NO! I see ‘Custer’s Revenge!’ A porno… on this system… ARGH!
Ai: NO! Not… ‘E.T.: the Extra Terrestrial…’
Ryoga: NO! [Screams in pain.] Not ‘Asteroids’!
Duo: [Finds it.] Ah-ha! PENNYARCADE!
[The Atari vanishes in a puff of smoke, only to have something reappear in it’s place.]
All: A GAMECUBE!
S3: Keep it! It’s a gift from God!
All: Woohoo!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

End of part 1. Well, that one sorta sucked. I admit it. Oh well… The next one should be better…

S3, the Demon Godling